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The short answer: no, not specifically. This is related to something we were talking about last night at my church, actually. There are two concepts in the Bible that you have to understand: "Law" and "Grace." "Law" means a set of rules that you follow in order to keep things square with God. The Ten Commandments are the most famous example of this, but the concept is throughout the Bible. "Grace" means that you are square with God because of the sacrifice of Christ Jesus on the cross. Under Grace, whether or not you follow rules and regulations does not determine if you are right with God; whether or not you accept Jesus' sacrifice for you determines whether you are right or wrong with God.
That is not to say that there are not right and wrong things to do even if you are living under grace. For example, a Christian under grace is not allowed to rob a convenience store at gunpoint. If he does, although he is forgiven by God when he confesses his sin, he is not forgiven by the owner of the convenience store or by the local police department. There are consequences of his actions which are not wiped out by Grace. So, there are "right" things to do, and there are "wrong" things to do, even if they are not necessarily always codified in specific sets of rules in the Bible.
The reason the Bible doesn't necessarily set up specific sets of rules for every circumstance is that, first of all, God doesn't WANT us to live under a Law. Part of the reason God gave the Law to the nation of Israel was to demonstrate how impossible it is to always perfectly follow a set of rules. Living that way is a losing game. And second of all, God has actually written His Law on our hearts (see Hebrews 10:16 http://esv.to/Heb10:16). If you have accepted God's sacrifice through Jesus, your heart knows right from wrong. You know when you've crossed the line; you don't need a playbook with diagrams and a tape measure to know whether you've gone "too far." Under grace, The Law which is external becomes unnecessary, because God's Law is internal to each of us.
But you don't need a rulebook to determine whether you have sinned or not anyway, because from God's perspective, the sin is not something you do with your body, but something you do with your heart. Matthew 5:27 (http://esv.to/Mat5:27) says that if you even look at someone with the intention of having sex outside of marriage, you have already sinned, whether you actually follow through with it or not. This is not to say that you can't be attracted to someone and desire a physical relationship, because sexual attraction was created by God. But the instant of the sin is probably sometime around when you go from "I would really like to go to bed with that person" to "If given a chance, I WILL go to bed with that person."
So: the Bible doesn't particularly give specific "how far is too far" rules, although doubtless you could find some in there if you look around enough. The reason why is that you already know the limits, because God has written them on your heart; if you choose to look for rules and regulations, you don't have to look any further than there. When the sin has occurred internally, the sin has occurred from God's perspective. My advice to you is: keep your mind pure. Keep your hands from going where they don't need to go. Keep the parts of your body that need to be covered, covered. And if you make a mistake in your heart, bring it before God in prayer and make it right; don't beat yourself up about it. Live under Grace; don't go looking for the Law to tell you what to do, because the Law is merciless in meting out punishment when you mess up. -
Nope, not that I know of, and I've read most of the Old Testament and all of the New Testament. I'd say it's mostly a matter of conscience... I suspect most people fantasize while they do it, and if you're not married to the person you're fantasizing about, that's a sin in your heart. For that reason I would personally classify it as a "dangerous" activity, spiritually speaking, but I don't think it is specifically prohibited by Scripture.
(But don't go running around telling people I said it was perfectly wonderful to masturbate! I absolutely didn't say that! :) ) -
I don't know that the Bible has any particular dos and don'ts for sex between two individuals of the opposite sex who are married to each other. There's some Old Testament stuff about women on their periods which is more about ceremonial uncleanness than actually about sex (unless you are a kosher Jew, those things are not really applicable). I think the rule of thumb is going to be that you shouldn't do anything to your partner that they do not want to do or that causes them injury. I'll try not to go into an impolite level of detail, but I'll say that there is nothing in the Bible about any forbidden sexual positions, and frequency of sex is up to the appetites of the two partners.
I don't think use of pornography is appropriate, but that's because pornography is there to stimulate lust for someone not in the marriage, and Jesus said that was the same as committing adultery with the object of lust (Matthew 5:27-30). I think things that cause (or risk) actual physical injury to one or both parties are a bad idea, not because they are prohibited during sex but because a lover does not injure the one he loves. But I don't see any Scriptural prohibitions against toys, props, costumes, lotions, or whatever, as long as neither partner is using them at the expense of the other. If I wanted my wife to wear a French maid outfit and she felt degraded doing it, then if I made her do it I would be using her, not loving her.
I guess what I'm getting at is this: if the two partners are loving each other with Godly love, there are certain lines they just naturally will not cross. Prohibitions are not necessary because when love is present, the things that would have been prohibited become foreign concepts. Focus on the love relationship; don't obsess too much about the sex. Sex is to enjoy, not to figure out. :) -
I don't know of a place in the Bible that says that a man and woman cannot live in the same dwelling if they are not married. There may be some Old Testament rules/customs related to that, but I don't see a moral reason why that wouldn't be OK. Now, if you are using "live together" as a euphemism for "have a sexual relationship," that changes the picture a bit.
I can think of two reasons off the top of my head that sex outside of a marriage relationship is not the way of believers in the Bible. One reason is that the Bible is pretty clear that two individuals who join themselves in a sexual relationship "become one flesh" (see 1 Corinthians 6:16 http://esv.to/1Cor6:16). Once you have united yourself to someone else, you can't un-unite... in some ways it would be like an amputation. That's why divorce is so emotionally horrible; it's severing one flesh. So having sex with someone and not being married to them is leaving yourself open to an emotional crash later on; with the marriage commitment in place there is a higher barrier to walking out the door. The barrier is for our own protection.
The other reason is that marriage is a picture of Christ's relationship to His bride, which is the Church (consisting of all Christians, not any specific group but all believers in Jesus) (see Ephesians 5:22-33 http://esv.to/Eph5:22-33). Doing an end-run around marriage in favor of having a sexual relationship while unmarried, even a stable, long-term relationship with commitment, paints a twisted picture of Christ's love for us. Jesus loved us enough to make a commitment, and a man should love his woman enough to make a commitment to her as well.
You could find a lot more reasons and arguments out there on the Web, but those are the ones that spring to mind. You might also take a look at these lists of Scriptures about Marriage and Sex on my site.
Things the Bible says about marriage:
http://scripturemenu.com/BibleVerseList.html?topicid=75
Things the Bible says about sex:
http://scripturemenu.com/BibleVerseList.html?topicid=33 -
I found an excellent article on this at: http://www.gotquestions.org/fear-God.html
Here's part of that article:
"For the unbeliever, the fear of God is the fear of the judgment of God and eternal death, which is eternal separation from God (Luke 12:5; Hebrews 10:31). For the believer, the fear of God is something much different. The believer's fear is reverence of God. Hebrews 12:28-29 is a good description of this: 'Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe, for our "God is a consuming fire."' This reverence and awe is exactly what the fear of God means for Christians. This is the motivating factor for us to surrender to the Creator of the Universe."
Particularly look at the last paragraph of that page; for a believer, "fear of God" isn't being afraid of God, although it does involve the knowledge that God's justice says that if we sin, there are consequences.
Sorry it took me so long to get to this! I wish I had done a little research earlier; that article says exactly what I would have wanted to say, except it said it probably quite a bit better! -
I do not think that God expects us to remain in a home situation that is abusive or dangerous, either physically or mentally. I do think God wants us to love those who are unlovely and who are broken. If you are in danger, by all means, get physically out of the situation before you get hurt. But do pray for your husband, and if you can persuade him to get help with his problems, do that too. I think God loves to heal situations; He doesn't want to see marriages go down the drain if He can make them right instead. But both parties have to cooperate in order for God to be able to work it out.
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There is NEVER a lost cause with God. It's not over until it's over, and it's over when a person breathes his/her last breath. Now, as far as a marriage is concerned, I see evidence in the Bible that a divorce from an unbelieving spouse who chooses to leave is justified, but I also see throughout the Word that God continues to receive His bride (the Church) back to Him, however unfaithful we may be. That said... it's not my place, as a stranger, to tell you what to do. But I do personally think that no woman (or man, for that matter) should have to put up with serial unfaithfulness on the part of a spouse. That's my own opinion.
Dovorce happens, but there's nothing terribly good about it, except when it extracts you from a situation that is more toxic than the divorce is. -
Marriage on Earth is a picture of Christ and the Church. The Word says that the wife is to submit to her husband as the church is to submit to Christ: see http://esv.to/Eph5:22-33. This does not mean that the wife is inferior to the husband in any way; in fact, Christ cherished His bride (the Church) so much that He gave His very life for her! And it doesn't take a whole lot of searching in the world around us to find a woman who is successfully leading a business or corporation or other organization; women are perfectly capable of leadership. It's not a matter of whether women are able to make wise decisions and lead. It's about roles, and of obedience to God.
Each of us is created in the image of God (http://esv.to/Gen1:27). The roles within the marriage relationship are not a function of the importance of the individual to God (see http://esv.to/1Pet3:1-7, especially verse 7, which affirms the equality of husband and wife before God). So God is not trying to illustrate anything about the eternal value of men and women; he values each of us equally. In fact, Jesus seemed to indicate that the institution of marriage is not even something that will carry forward from this life into the next one (http://esv.to/Mat22:30). It seems that women submitting to men in a marriage relationship may be something that only occurs in this lifetime.
So if it's not a matter of the capabilities of the individual, the whole "submission" thing must purely be a matter of roles. In general, the wife and husband should find a place of agreement on decisions, but in (hopefully rare) cases where agreement is impossible, a Godly wife will defer to her husband's judgment, not because he is superior or even right, but because it is God's command that she do so. She should of course pray for her husband so that God can change the husband's mind if need be! By remaining within the role God has set out for her as the wife, she remains within God's will and is able to receive God's blessings. Notice that it does not say that the wife should "obey" her husband, but to "submit." "Obey" would mean that the wife has no choice but to do as she was told; "submit" indicates that she is willingly yielding her will to her husband's, not because he is someone more powerful but because it is the role she chooses to live within.
That said, remember that the husband also has a responsibility to fulfill. The wife is to "submit" to her husband, but the husband is to "love" the wife, and Paul also adds "do not be harsh to them" - http://esv.to/Col3:18-19. A husband who is truly loving his wife in the active sense of the word (not just emotionally feeling love for her, but showing his love through his actions) will not ignore her advice, will not steamroll over her feelings; he will value what she has to say, and take her advice when he can see the wisdom in it. So in the proper marriage relationship, the wife does not have an inferior role; her role is just as important as that of the husband. Her thoughts are taken into account and treated with respect. Her husband has no authority in the home unless she gives it to him by "submitting" her will to his. She chooses to give him that authority not only because she loves him, but because she loves God and wants to remain within God's will for her.
I strongly believe that the marriage relationship is the most potent picture of God's love for us and desire for relationship with us that exists. When someone looks at your or my Godly marriage, they should see past it to the relationship between God and His people. Even if they don't realize that's what they're seeing, they should be able to see that there is more going on there than just two people who like to live in the same house and have sex. God has painted a picture for us. He has written a play, and we are the actors. A participant in a dramatic presentation has not given up her free will in order to be in the play; she chooses to play the role in a certain way in order to tell the story that needs to be told. Even so, different actresses will play the same role in slightly different ways, even when they are given the same lines and directions. At any point they could quit playing the role they were presented with, but they choose of their own free will to play the part as written, injecting a little bit of their own personalities and life into the character but always trying to stay on-script. Godly husbands and wives have been given the task and the opportunity to demonstrate Christ's sacrifice, His love, and the Church's submission and devotion in the world. It's not a matter of who is the more important partner in the partnership; it's a matter of voluntarily living within the confines of the role we have been presented with, and by doing so, demonstrating Christ's love to the world. -
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If you are in Christ and Christ is in you, you can do all things through Christ who strengthens you! If you are in Christ and Christ is in you, ask what you will, and it will be done for you! Trust in the Lord with all your heart, don't depend only on your own understanding, acknowledge Him in all of your ways, and he will make sure the path of your life is straight and clear in front of you!
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There is a whole page of Scriptures about work on my Web site at: http://www.scripturemenu.com/BibleVerseList.html?topicid=71
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Most people know the number from the book of Revelation: "This calls for wisdom: let the one who has understanding calculate the number of the beast, for it is the number of a man, and his number is 666." (Revelation 13:18 http://esv.to/Rev+13:18 ) The fact is, nobody actually knows what it means to "calculate" the number, or what is meant by "it is the number of a man." Maybe the people at the time of the apostle John, who wrote Revelation, knew it, but we certainly don't today. Maybe even they didn't understand it, and it won't be clear until the Antichrist is revealed to the World. But the number itself isn't a particularly evil number; in fact, I ran across it the other day in Ezra 2:13 (http://esv.to/Ezra+2:13 ) in a completely innocent context. I've heard before that six is the number of mankind (created on the sixth day, etc.) and since seven is the number of God, six indicates imperfection, and since God is three-in-one, 7-7-7 would indicate God, and 6-6-6 would indicate man trying to be God. I don't know how much relevance that really has, but there you go.
I think people use 666 to symbolize evil mostly because it's just an easy symbol that everyone understands. You can spray-paint it on a building and everyone immediately knows that you thought you were being all evil. You can tattoo it on your arm and everyone knows that you're saying that you're a bad dude that shouldn't be messed with. But in the end, it's just a number. Revelation associates it with the Antichrist, but honestly, there are a lot of very CLEAR indicators of the Antichrist in Scripture. There's no reason to get concerned that if you don't understand what 666 means that you won't be able to figure out who the Antichrist is. Study out the other portions of Scripture about him, and you'll have plenty to go on. If you're here when he shows up, he will be unmistakable. -
The book of Ecclesiastes says "Remember also your Creator in the days of your youth, before the evil days come and the years draw near of which you will say, 'I have no pleasure in them' " (http://esv.to/Eccl 12/). The writer of Ecclesiastes tried everything he could think of to make himself happy - entertainment, money, superior knowledge, sex, everything. What he discovered was that anything you do in your life apart from God is meaningless. The point of the book of Ecclesiastes is to start out early, when you are a young person, following after God's will for you... and then when you get older, you won't have to look back and say, "Well, THAT was a waste of time!"
Now, as to "how" to follow God so that you don't one day look back and say that... I'm afraid that's not a question that can really be answered for you by somebody else. You probably know some of the key things you can do: learn everything you can about God's Word, spend time praying and worshiping God, that sort of thing. Another key is found in 2 Timothy 2:22 - "So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart." (http://esv.to/2 Tim 2:22/ ) By "youthful passions" Paul wasn't just talking about sexual passion (although that certainly qualifies) but he meant that you should remain cool-headed and not make big decisions based on the emotion of the moment. Check every decision against the Word of God and the voice of the Holy Spirit within you (meaning, pray about it and then listen to what God says back) and you won't spend your life messing up.
It also means that there are times when you literally should "flee" something that you know better than to get mixed up in. Recently a woman was telling my wife and me about how proud she is of her teen-aged daughters, who have a habit of calling or texting their mom when they are with friends and it looks like things might go in the wrong direction. "Mom, call me and tell me I have to come home right now!" is a text message she's received several times from her girls. They are fleeing from a situation they know they don't want to be in. A famous example of this "get out of there!" strategy is found in Genesis 39:1-23. (http://esv.to/Gen 39:1-23/ )
I would advise you to read that passage in Genesis, and also take a look at Ecclesiastes. Ecclesiastes can seem quite depressing (because the author was kind of down when he wrote it), but you need to look at it as an example of what will happen if you do not choose to follow God. I can't tell you step by step exactly what to do to serve Jesus - I don't know your situation (where you live, what needs might be around you that God might call on you to fill, what your gifts and talents might be, etc.) but I do know that young people face temptation (old people do too!) and need to resist it. And I do know that God had something in mind for you when He placed you on Earth, and He has no intention of keeping it a secret from you. Hook up to him - plug in like plugging lamp into a wall socket - by getting your mind filled with what the Bible says and by spending time in His presence in prayer and worship, and when the time comes for you to make a decision about what to do with yourself, make your decision based on God's counsel and not your own "youthful passions" and you will do just fine.
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