One Fine Day
One Fine Day...
It was dusk, the brave troll squad had spent 5 days dug in the trench.
Fierce fighting all around, The battle was not just with the trolls
themeselves but also with their hideous smell, wich was a cross between
burnt henbane cookies and joxers cologne.
They was dug in waiting for Joxer to return with napalm for ravenmanes
flamethrower, The other two barrels we had of napalm were all used on this
nasty troll Urth, even after he was as crispy as KFC ravenmane kept toasting
him until he looked like a smore that had been left on the campfire for 2 days.
Cathbad: Man what are we gonna do???
Zwolf: We got no weapons!
UnHoly: Well we do got these stale henbane cookies! We can chuck them at the trolls!
Cathbad: Well if that moron joxer ever gets back we can toast them.
Jetthead: Hey leave Joxer alone... he's soooo handsome.... ahhhh.
Zwolf: God! Not again.
UnHoly: Jett you been eating some of these cookies?
Cathbad: Yeah your vision must be impaired.
(crunch crunch crunch, gulp)
Ravenmane: Anyone got any milk???
Cathbad: RAVENMANE!!!
UnHoly: You ate our defense!
Zwolf: Dohhh!
(a loud clanky sound came from over the hill)
UnHoly: Hey i know that sound!
Cathbad: Yeah the sound of cheap made armor.
Zwolf: Can only be one person...
Jetthead: Yeah that hunk Joxer...
All: Shutup!
Jetthead: What did i say???
(As joxer comes closser the patrol can see he only has a small box.)
UnHoly: JOXER! Wheres the napalm?!?!?
Joxer: Ohh... i forgot it, but i did get these tasty fishcakes.
All: You idiot!
Zwolf: Now what???
Cathbad: This dosnt look good.
(just then a large thumping sound came from the near by tree line)
Zwolf: What the h*ll is that sound...
(just then the biggest nastiest troll ever seen came thru the clearing in the forest.)
Cathbad: ohh my #*^%& god!
Joxer: Uhh, i'll see you guys later......
(joxer runs of in the distance, Jetthead gives chase, yelling something about, come here lover boy.)
Zwolf: Now what???
UnHoly: Hmmm, i have an idea.
(Zwolf and Cathbad gather around UnHoly)
UnHoly: See that pouch on the trolls waste???
Cathbad: Yeah so what???
UnHoly: Let's tell ravenmane that he has some henbane cookies in it...
Zwolf: What makes you think she'll believe us??
UnHoly: ahemm... look.
(they all look over to see ravenmane, dazed from her earlier henbane cookies, sitting their singing 99 bottles of beer on the wall.)
Cathbad: Well theirs your answer.
(they stroll over to Ravenmane)
UnHoly: Hey ravenmane...
Ravenmane: Yeppers, hey cathbad when did you grow that 2nd head...
Cathbad: uhhh...
Zwolf: She must be halucinating.
UnHoly: Hey Raven, ya see that troll out their???
Ravenmane: Yep, he's a little fuzzy but i see him.
UnHoly: Well that pouch on his waste is full of henbane cookies!
(a glem of insanity showed in ravenmanes eyes)
Ravenmane: Wait here guys......
(ravenmae sprung to her feet and ran head down towards the troll, she ran head first into the troll, knocking him backwards.)
Zwolf: Come on, Kick his behind raven!
Cathbad: I say 10:1
UnHoly: I'll take those odds.
(Zwolf looks over to see cathbad and UnHoly exchanging some dinars.)
Ravenmane: I want those cookies...
Troll: ughh ughh ughh, brrrackky.
Ravenmane: Dont give me that! i know you got cookies!
(ravenmae cut into the troll like a hot knife thru butter, she toyed with him at first dancing around him, then let him have it with multiple shots to the gut.)
Ravenmae: haha take that and that!
(yelling to ravenmae)
UnHoly: HEY! He also has some nutbread in their!
Ravenmae: Nutbread!!!!
(ravenmane draws back and lays her fist across the trolls face, as he stumbles back and falls, Raven walks over and kicks him a few times to make sure he's down and out.)
UnHoly: Hey you did it!
Cathbad: Good Job!
Zwolf: We never doubted you!
(ravenmane smiles then reaches down for the pouch, she tears it from the troll and opens it.)
Ravenmane: What the hell is this!?!? Empty!?!?!?
UnHoly: Well.. uhh...see, ummm. It was Cathbads idea.
Cathbad: The heck it was it was Zwolfs....
(Just then they seen the fury in her eyes, as she belted out her battle cry.)
Ravenmane: YIYIYIYIYIYIYIYI!!!!
UnHoly: AHHH, Run for your life!
Ravenmane: Run for your miserable lives!
(UnHoly, Cathbad, and Zwolf... Ran for dear life, with Ravenmae giving chase into the sunset, their crys heard from a distance.)
Cathbad: Mercy...mercy!
UnHoly: Ahhh, for the love of god NOOOOOO.
Zwolf: Ackkkk! No please not that.....
Ravenmane: Whuhahahaha, Muhahahaha.
Tony
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Last Updated 09-Jan-97 tony@shelbynet.net