e3logo2.gif (3979 bytes)Chet's Notes/Rants/Reviews from E3
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A Really fat Gene Simmons* hangs out...
1st off... did I go to a different show than everyone else?  Why aren't people raving hysterically about Half-life? Maybe it was the lack of half-life dancers and strippers?  For more on half-life check out Erik's review...  This was the best game of the show...  By the way there is nothing wrong with sleeping for 15 hours straight.
Independence War/ I-war
Okay, first off, us kids in the know have been playing this game for sometime now, and I think most people would agree this is an incredible game. Probably the most favorably talked about game on the newsgroups this year.
I go to E3 expecting there to be a buzz about the 3DFX/USA version release nope. There stands Michael Powell  playing Independence War while everyone just walks by You would think he was just another talking head from the likes of the Nintendo booth
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Chet with Michael Powell from Particle-systems.

For one minute, screw Lara Croft and the ass she walked in with this is the guy who programmed the game that has made me lose the most sleep since Doom. I am sure I made an ass out of myself as I held back bowing in his presence. Look, I hate a lot of games, and I like a some games, but how in the hell does I-War get lost in the E3 Shuffle? Who gives a rats ass about warmed over RTS or isometric click fests? I look around on some other sites tonight and nary a mention Did you know Michael Powell also programmed the classic Amiga game Powerdrome? This game was so ahead of the POD/Wipeout scene its sickening I will say it right now The best moment of E3 was meeting Michael and then later getting a picture with him.

Unreal
Played it before E3 and didnt bother stopping by the booth at E3 what a bunch of pretty shit Hey who made these pretty pillows for me to lay my head down on? BORING. Terrible AI, shitty weapons hell Id should sue for this much plagiarism stupid mapping, unimaginative in everyway this game brought nothing new to the world of 3D gaming oh excuse me : one thing the most amazing over the top bullshit advanced PR ever Monsters have such great AI that, get this, they attack you! WOW!  This game has soured me on all the up and coming Quake Killers... well almost all...  Every booth would talk about great story, scripted scenes, great AI...  One and only one game actually showed it at the show, all the rest just talked about that was the last thing they were working on...  F'it...   Give me Atari 2600 blocky graphics and great AI before you give me pretty pictures that have the AI of dragons in Atari 2600 adventure.  The one game that showed what they talked about? HALF-LIFE!

Half-Life
Erik will say everything I could say what a game If you are going to give me a 3D world and ask me to become engrossed in it, please fill it with a real world Half-life does and the AI looks amazing. This is simple the game I am looking the most forward to
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Chet with Gabe Newell and Yahn Bernier of Valve Software.
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Half-Life Booth

OGRS Coverage Of E3

Way to type in those game companys press releases OGR is the fucking scum of the earth "COMING SOON THE AMAZING PONG 2!" FEATURING Jai Lai Here is wishing for a very small very powerful earthquake.

TombRaider. What version am I playing.
Wake me when virtual sex is a reality until then this game is boringly the same.

Fox Interactive, The whole stinking booth...
"Our feeling is that nobody has been able to translate the drama and excitement of tennis to the video game experience," said Jon Richmond, president of Fox Interactive. yeah passing out in front of the TV while pounding warm beer and chasing it with Fritos could pass for this same excitement Tennis is boring  if this asshole has this much bullshit to say about a tennis game, just think of what crap he is going to pile on once he gets to games people under 65 actually play. If fox wants to make a splash with their tennis game they should include a secret code so you can play as the naked Martina Hingis  As a side note:   Scully showed up for some autograph session for the X-files...  We were behind the Fox Structure checking out some game when this guy bursts through the wall and starts screaming "NO PICTURES, NO PICTURES"  I instantly start snapping photo only to realize I should take a picture of what he's hiding... its scully, but security kept everyone back and I was unable to snap a photo of here emerging from the woman's room (which they had sealed off just for her, rumor has it she stunk up the place...)

Diablo 2
I was forcibly removed from the controls of this game as my head was rested on the keyboard as a pillow new spell new weapon SAME FUCKING GAME!!!!   Blizzard sucks... have they every made anything new?  Has any game of theirs had an original idea?  Every game is a derivative of someone else's and then they franchise it by merely repeating it... Go Blizzard... I asked one Blizzard lackey about the Registry thing and he blew me off, so since he did that I won't talk now...

C&C2
I was shagged in a time warp Oh yeah new graphics new gameplay? Well it would be new if I hadnt already experienced it in Total annihilation
Ho hum at least I was promised there would be none of those crappy interior scenarios. I plan on making a pillow out of the upcoming RTS releases.. I was told that time management is an important part of C&C... or? Click Fest.
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Coolest thing about C&C2 was the burned out setup they had at the show...

Myth 2
Again I defer to Erik this is his all time favorite. I liked what I saw with some minor advancements and some bugs worked out should be fun.  At least they seemed to have put in some thought to their sequel.

Descent III/ Forsaken
I may have been drunk but I think they released these together by accident and were dismayed that no one noticed

Sin
It was one of those hard to tell demos. Everything we asked about was "coming" the AI we were shown sucked But it had a lot that impressed I would still right now take Half-life but Sin did not entirely suck

Interstate 82
I was given dirty looks when I asked if this game would break down into me driving around in circles shooting...  Who knows... the frigging missions in 76 took an hour to play, how can you tell whats up in 10 seconds?

Age Of Empires II
NOW NOW NOW. That is when I want this game cool new graphics.. with check this out blizzard NEW GAME PLAY!!!! Oh my god! Yes it can be done! YOU ARE ALLOWED TO IMPROVE THE GRAPHICS AND THE GAMEPLAY AT THE SAME TIME!!!!! They have "lifted" a few things from Myth, but that will only improve on an office favorite. These improvements include veterans and formations. I am really looking forward to this sequel.  This is probably my second favorite game of the show.

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A Giant Madden Guarded the E3 booth... at least he was silent...
Baseball Games
Alot of baseball games to compare at E3... The winner? Microsoft's 3D baseball.  The depth of info on the players goes deep, including their digitized likeness on the players head (Randy Johnson was not near ugly enough, but that kind of face should be saved for horror only games...)  For the 64 Ken Griffy jr baseball was fun, I just wonder if Nintendo is going to package a cutie to play with you? EA and Triple Play should apologize for the initial releases terrible internet problems and why does the interface scream console to me?  I have a friggin computer, make me an interface... and what are you using my voodoo card on?
Please read chet's featured review and watch him take this all back...

Chaos
This is another one of those, did anyone else notice this?  This was in the Ubisoft booth. Very cool outdoor 1st person shooter/vehicle driving game...  The demo was slightly buggy and the only people there to explain the game insisted on speaking in a fake French accent making it very hard to understand...   But this really looked cool, and, more importantly, played well. Almost like a really fast and hectic mechwarrior game...

Rayman 2
Liked the first one, and this sequel is impressive.   Compared to this, Croc is a waste...

MotorHead
1st, I did not break the game.  The women I was racing did... the subsequent squabble had nothing to do with my abusing any equipment... to be honest the game was nothing special at all... beating my Oriental Foe, that was special... she was forced to break her racer just to try and avoid defeat...  I do not know the Japanese word for loser, but she got the idea...

Cosmopolitan Makeover
F' these people.. yes Erik wants to go to the booth and get the Essence makeover...  how come that is funny and the fact that every cover of cosmo has a model leaning over showing off her breasts not funny?  I think we were given pins and a T-shirt just so we would leave.

Daikatana
There is nothing to say about this game... another boring 1st person shooter that claims this and that will be coming but the playable demo seemed like Hexen, and I hate Hexen... The thing that marveled me at the Ion Storm's booth was John Romero's giant chin...  I have never heard mention of this so I was unprepared...  This guy puts Jay Leno to shame... It terrified me so badly, Erik had to talk me out of hiding in the bathroom the rest of the show.  An added bonus, there was talk about the sequel to Daikatana... yikes!

Console Quick comment
Perfect Dark the only game that I would not mind if it was just more of the same...
Metal Gear Solid, looked very cool.

I can not remember the rest... the new ultima (Ultima IX: Ascension) looks cool,  Need for speed 3 was fun, watching super hot Japanese chicks play Special Ops was cool, Special Ops gets the just okay rating... loved the demo and then splat... the demo is almost as long as the whole game...  The new simcity looks like nothing new, I am sure I will play the new Populous,  the only thing I saw about prey was the rolling demo and played baseball with one of the developers...  can't say much except wow that boy sweated... the new duke looks cool, really Duke Nukem was the only game to ever beat out Doom if only for 10 minutes until Quake... oh well...

Also a favorite of both Erik and I was the use of "strippers" to help sell games... I am sure this is what they have in mind when they say they are marketing games toward women.... check out the women of games...


Questions? Comments?  Email Chet@murrayandsons.com
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I just want to be the first to say... I like Southpark, and their new game is sure to suck...

 

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