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04/12/98
#73
Wassenaar, Flavor Flav, Zope!

27/11/98
#72
Netscape dies, Cliffilms, Chocolata

20/11/98
#71
Phantom Menace, Patches as Art, and Wiki

13/11/98
#70
Domains, Ataris, and Tommy Flowers

06/11/98
#69
Mark thingy, Christian whatsisname, and Scawen scary name

30/10/98
#68
HipCrime, Tron and Halloweeeeen

23/10/98
#67
More Tales From The Crypt, Sunbather Falco and Roobarb

16/10/98
#66
ADSL, John Prescott, and the Anarchist Bookfair

09/10/98
#65
DVD 1 Industry 0, XFM, and Funny Food

02/10/98
#64
Sky Digitalis, Clickety-Click

25/09/98
#63
Dixons Docks, Orwell Knocks, but Flash gets it clean

18/09/98
#62
ISP trust, RISC PC busts, and homeless IT bosses

11/09/98
#61
Starr networks, Ya Basta Blasters, token Windows software

04/09/98
#60
Explorer runs out of memories, PGP 6, and Pat

28/08/98
#59
Whose whois, Gameboy hacking, San Francisco

21/08/98
Holiday Special #7
BT Highway Robbery, Bab5 Wrap Party,
CU Amiga RIP

14/08/98
Holiday Special #6
Strange Customs, OpenSource Meet, Victorian Net

07/08/98
#58
Microsoft doublethink, Beebisms, Resfest

31/07/98
#57
Net myths, Spy cams, and Hartley Hare

24/07/98
#56
Beeb Falco, Millions Lost, and Dave "King Stupid" Green

17/07/98
#55
Apple booms, DES doomed, DEFCON reaches VI

10/07/98
#54
iMacs, Script Kiddies, and Is He Serious?

03/07/98
#53
Ireland, Italy, and the End of The World

26/06/98
#52
Net censors, Psion, and dead as a SOHO

19/06/98
#51
Nominaughtiness, databastardery, and Patrick Moore event

12/06/98
#50
BT goes cheap, Doc Solomon goes West, and ICQ goes downmarket

05/06/98
#49
No news, street news, sweet news

29/05/98
#48
@Home, Ross' Foundation, Power Renames

22/05/98
#47
Gateswar!, Open Source flightsim, and a happy birthday

15/05/98
#46
MacOS X, Anarchist Studies, and bloody Killer Net

08/05/98
#45
Red Buses, Apple iMacs, more Killer Net

01/05/98
#44
Crypto policy, IMDB sales, MP3 in your car

24/04/98
#43
Falcomania, ICA knobbled, Spacewar!

17/04/98
#42
BIB rumours, Intel downturn, and Dougie Coupland

10/04/98
#41
RIPE.NET, Microsoft bribes, Richard 'Trek Wars' Barry

03/04/98
#40
Demon sales, USENET wars, MOZILLA!

27/03/98
#39
JavaOne, Edge Dunderheads, Virtual Turntables

20/03/98
#38
LineOne, Scallywag, and Fete de l'Internet

13/03/98
#37
Crypto, Technorealists, Crypto-Technorealists

06/03/98
#36
Gates and the Senators, IWF takes their PICS, Bull Electronic

27/02/98
#35
BIB backtracking, Hacker witch hunts, UKCAC

20/02/98
#34
Crypto shenanigans, Alledged Jobs nuttiness, Action SuperCross

13/02/98
#33
Key escrow, Tempest spooks, XML

06/02/98
#32
Bill flanned, Postel goes postal, mealy MILIA melee

30/01/98
#31
Compaq gobble DEC, Bill damage-limits, Time Crisis 2

23/01/98
#30
Netscape lose the source,
CU Amiga "sucks dogs", Pinker speaks!

16/01/98
#29
Excite gets kids, Dennis has kittens, Webmedia kicks bucket

09/01/98
#28
Microsoft mad, Apple make money, the zine scene

29/12/97
#27
Review of '97, big TV, readers' efforts, Happy New Year!

19/12/97
#26
Microsoft smacks back, OpenGL losses, Paarty!

12/12/97
#25
Yahoo hacked, OpenGL victories, DOJ smack Microsoft

05/12/97
#24
Cybersquatting blues, MSN puzzles, and the return of the FiReD

28/11/97
#23
Bactel spurned, hackers liberated and the erotic olympics

21/11/97
#22
Gates as Caligula, ISO Java and .NOT

14/11/97
#21
FOOF bug, Easynet goofed, good food

07/11/97
#20
E-on bust, Kashpureff nicked, Apple silly.

31/10/97
#19
StrongARM tactics, laser ban,
Sci-Fi Con 2.0

24/10/97
#18
Microsoft naughtiness, Quake II, Mark Leyner

17/10/97
#17
Cassini, Survival Research Labs, SlashCon

10/10/97
#16
Sun vs Gates, Pickering and the ZX Psion

03/10/97
#15
Worldcom, IE4.0, and Negativland

26/09/97
#14
Crypto weirdness, Easynet moneymaking and Win95 cracking.

19/09/97
Holiday Special #5
MiniNTK - by the seaside.

12/09/97
Holiday Special #4
MiniNTK - the nation mourns.

05/09/97
Holiday Special #3
MiniNTK - to "Di" for.

22/08/97
Holiday Special #1
MiniNTK - live from Mir.

15/08/97
#13
HIP fallout, surveillance and kites.

08/08/97
#12
Jobs & Gates, game.com and HIP '97.

01/08/97
#11
Boys for the Jobs, Clan Negroponte and Sci-Fi Archaeologists.

25/07/97
#10
LINX update, Virus wars, ECAL '97.

18/07/97
#9
Internic spazzes, fibre slashes, and the dreaded Ecstacy

11/07/97
#8
Amelio goes, NHS hate TTP, and Hard *ptuii* Wired.

04/07/97
#7
Windows 98, Mars, and no "Independence Day" references.

27/06/97
#6
CDA, Cousteau, Access All Areas the third.

20/06/97
#5
Psion, Iridium, and Lee Harvey Oswald.

13/06/97
#4
Comcast, Viewdata Revival Movement, Osmose.

06/06/97
#3
Microsoft in Cambridge, Arthur C. Clarke Award, Earplugs

30/05/97
#2
Sega/Bandai, Robert Anton Wilson, Perl Conference

23/05/97
#1
Crypto, Ken Campbell, the Beeb. Michelle.

16/05/97
Final Beta - Rhapsody, MIDI Karaoke, Jimmy Hill.

09/05/97
Second Beta - BIB, The Hugos, Geek Golf.

02/05/97
First Beta - Brandname tattooing, bad Deep Blue predictions.

21/03/97
Appalling first efforts.


|| HARD NEWS || ANTI-NEWS || EVENT QUEUE || TRACKING || MEMEPOOL || GEEK MEDIA || SMALL PRINT ||

 _   _ _____ _  __ <*the* weekly high-tech sarcastic update for the uk>
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|  \| | | | | ' / | '_ \ / _ \ \ /\ / / o  to majordomo@lists.ntk.net
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|_| \_| |_| |_|\_\|_| |_|\___/ \_/\_/   o     http://www.ntk.net/
        
                    
        "A Sedgwick County Juvenile Court judge will decide today
        whether four children should be removed from a home police
        found littered with animal waste... Police also found an
        abundance of Star Trek magazines, posters and memorabilia,
        and couldn't understand the father at first because he spoke
        to his wife and children in Klingon."
        - THE WICHITA EAGLE, http://newslibrary.infi.net/wichita/
                                            ...why we don't have kids
                                                           (anymore)

                                >> HARD NEWS <<
                                spitting truths

         Looks like it's not just Pinochet who thinks diplomatic
         immunity protects him from the truth. This week, it was the
         turn of the US's "crypto ambassador" DAVID AARON, who came
         bounding out of the Wassenaar conference in Vienna crowing
         that almost every other country in the world had agreed to
         adopt America's dumb-ass "no export of crypto beyond an
         NSA-crackable 64 bits" policy. Well, up to a point,
         Ambassador. Odd that the less-developed nations (like
         Germany, Canada - and even the less than strident UK) had
         switched from their semi-official "no buggering Yank spooks
         are going to tap *us*" stance in one day. Odd too, that
         Aaron's press release was out by 3:30, when agreement was
         only reached at 3:00. Could it be that Aaron was offered a
         sop to take home to Clinton: that the Wassanaar signatories
         agreed to *allow* control of 64+ bit crypto, while at the
         same time making sure that all the signatories could
         "disappear" any obligation to enforce such a control?
         http://www.wassenaar.org/
         - ambassador, with your unusual assumptions you are spoiling us 
         http://jya.com/wa-state98.htm 
                         - what, no "shut that idiot Aaron up" clause
         http://www.ntk.net/wassenaar/
                                            - those details in "full"

         Mind you, the US security services aren't the only ones to
         have an easy ride in their snooping. The EU, it seems, are
         planning to mirror the Anglo-Americans' Echelon surveillance
         system with a dandy new network of their own, designed to
         tap into mobile and Iridium communications Europe-wide. Of
         course, the cops were too busy planning this foolproof
         tapping of their citizens comms to notice when
         someone of them reversed the polarity on the paper - and
         leaked it to the excellent Telepolis. Straight back at ya,
         ENFOPOL!
         http://www.telepolis.de/tp/deutsch/special/enfo/6329/1.html
                                                 - hasta la babelfish
         
         MP3 bootleggers found some unexpected converts to the cause
         on Tuesday, when hip-hop old schoolers PUBLIC ENEMY
         unilaterally planned to stick their underpromoted album
         Bring The Noise 2000 online - all 27 tracks of it. By
         Thursday, the show had been officially "bum-rushed" by
         record label, Def Jam (or "Def Scam" as PE previously
         described them), and the page replaced by highly critical
         invective against "execs, lawyers and accountants",
         concluding "Let 'em all die". Probably not what Def Jam had
         in mind, but not quite as hilarious as US ska-punk outfit
         Less Than Jake, who inadvertently placed 3 entire albums on
         their site, due to a "mistake on the website manager's
         part". There's clearly only one way to stamp out this
         dreadful piracy problem - ban music altogether.
         http://www.mp3.com/news/140.html
                        - this one goes out to the Ninfomania crew...
    http://www.geocities.com/SoHo/Workshop/1813/communiques/comm3.htm
                     -  ...we're shorter, funnier - and later than you


                                >> ANTI-NEWS << 
                             berating the obvious
         
         now *that's* a comeback (see 1960 in the dateline):
    http://cgi.pathfinder.com/time/time100/builder/profile/merrill.html
         ... FT Business Website Award for BBC News Online
         misengraved to "BBC Online"; News plan to "burn it in middle
         of office" ... oh those original ad writers: NETWORK
         SOLUTIONS claim to be the ".com people", SUN reckon they're
         the "dot in .com"... GUARDIAN runs "Chinese mistranslations
         of film titles" http://www.topfive.com list as real (well,
         if the NYT ran it, it must be true, right?) ... are DIXONS
         trying to tell us something about the new PalmPilot?
         http://freepages.pavilion.net/users/dphelan/dixons-281198.jpg
         GUARDIAN fills column by running press releases through jive
         filter... ID SOFTWARE up for a *serious* man-beating with
         http://www.ntk.net/doh/id981203.jpg ... and what's the instant
         prize at the bottom of the http://www.camelot.co.uk/ tree?

                               >> EVENT QUEUE << 
                         goto's considered non-harmful

         "The UK hacking scene is all but dead: most of the
         community's leading lights have retired, no new hacking
         conferences are planned", writes MICHAEL MCCORMACK in this
         week's Telegraph - with his usual perfect timing, three days
         before the biggest conference of the UK haxxor calendar,
         CONSPIRACY. Here, the British computer underground will be
         celebrating their non-existence with ten hours of
         alcohol-fuelled oblivion, games of "Blinds Man's vi", and a
         old tales told around a roaring Unix LAN ("servers in a
         seperate room ... for various reasons including local
         exploits and puke"). The wake will take place at
         Manchester's Tapas Tapas Nightclub, from 1600GMT this
         Saturday 4/12/98. The venue holds two hundred persons, so be
         sure to turn up early to avoid bumping into McCormack
         sitting on his own, eyes shut and singing "lah-lah-lah" to
         block out the decks.
         http://www.dac.org/conspiracy/ - the men in cider and black
         

                                >> TRACKING <<
                  making good use of the things that we find 

         Professional Web content systems companies, switching to
         Open Source - as recommended by their own *venture
         capitalist*? That's *sick*. ZOPE is a PERVERTED hybrid of
         the widely-regarded BOBO object-oriented CGI replacement,
         and the previously commercial PRINCIPIA Web application
         system. It's also got the Aqueduct relational database
         system thrown in. It's all free, source code is included,
         and even more horrifically, it's centered on the PYTHON
         language, that politically-correct, nicely-formatted,
         easy-to-read OPEN BLOODY SOURCE scripting language. ZOPE's
         creators will be releasing the source later today, so we
         haven't had a chance to play, but we hope it's bloody
         rubbish, otherwise we'll have nothing nasty to say at all.
         http://www.zope.org/
                  - nice clean well-written Website too. CURSE THEM! 
         

                                >> MEMEPOOL << 
                              hasta la altavista

         if LARA CROFT *is* nominated as British Technology Ambassador,
         does she get diplomatic immunity for all those people she
         shot in South America? ... SIEGEL finally eats his words -
         http://www.it.fairfax.com.au/981103/webmechanic1.html ...
         Internet Explorer "Platinum Channels" now Windows Media
         Showcase... http://www.planetquake.com/titanic/ ...
         http://sgi.impact.nl.com/ - what did I miss ? ...
         http://cvs.anu.edu.au/andy/beye/beyehome.html ... DOUGIE
         COUPLAND wants a $1 mill for his next novel... we're
         assuming this isn't an official TELE*UBBIES site:
         http://newgrounds.com/tubby/ ... as if life isn't depressing
         enough: http://www.brunching.com/toys/toy-alanislyrics.html
       http://www.userfriendly.org/cartoons/archives/98dec/19981203.html
         - STALLMAN for Chewie!

                               >> GEEK MEDIA << 
                      may contain strongly-typed language

         TV>> yeah, we know, we should be doing a TV version of NTK
         for this groovy new 4 LATER strand (after midnight, most
         nights, C4 ), maybe like a webpage version of VH1 pop
         subversion classic POP-UP VIDEO (1.15am, Fri, C4)... oh, and
         please note that it's a subjunctive, not an imperative in
         the title of Bruce Lee chop-socky cracker ENTER THE DRAGON
         (10.20pm, Fri, BBC1)... more martial arts lore with Beat
         Takeshi's acclaimed SONATINE (1.10am, Sat, BBC2)... and
         Verhoeven uses the "and then I woke up and it was all a
         dream" excuse for the euphoric violence (and hair-trigger
         Sharon Stone performance) of class Arnie sci-fi TOTAL RECALL
         (9.55pm, Sat, ITV)... 4 Later offers North London slacker
         sitcom TOTTENHAM 2 (12.20am, Sat, C4) followed by '70s cop
         spoof (and "Funky Squad" inspiration) THE MOD SQUAD
         (12.50am, Sat, C4)... and further Sharon Stone shenanigans
         in underrated Sam Raimi designer Western THE QUICK AND THE
         DEAD (10pm, Sun, C4)... disappointingly, new pathology
         one-off MCCALLUM (9pm, Mon, ITV) isn't about the adventurs
         of eternal special guest star David McCallum, trapped in
         endless series of satellite sci-fi shows, struggling to find
         his way back home... ADULT RICKI (10.45pm, Tue, C4) tackles
         the very modern dilemma of how to get sex videos back from
         your ex (Pamela Anderson, Kelsey Grammer please note)... a
         buttock-numbing *two-and-a-half hours* devoted to animation
         in new run of DOPE SHEET (11.30pm, Tue, C4) - probably
         without even a Disney musical number to change the pace -
         seems unlikely to trouble the intermittent return of
         SEINFELD/ THE LARRY SANDERS SHOW (11.10pm, Tue, BBC2)... 
         the showing of stupid-dumb overlong Queen video HIGHLANDER
         (9.30pm, Tue, BBC1) is inexplicably "postponed in some
         regions from 24 November", presumably due to some clashing
         news story about decapitation, immortals or Sean Connery...
         and you'd hope that, coming from Roger & Me / TV Nation
         leftist prankster Michael Moore, CANADIAN BACON (10pm, Thu,
         C4) would be a cooler, funnier version of "Wag The Dog".
         You'd be wrong...

         FILM>> turning a bug into a feature, top-notch non-stop
         action spoof RUSH HOUR (imdb: police / trust / bravery /
         detective / friend / hero / hostage / kidnapping) neatly
         sidesteps Jackie Chan's delicate grasp of the English
         language, and lets The Fifth Element's Chris Tucker - and
         Jackie's fists - do all the talking... George "Mad Max"
         Miller ditches the farmyard promotion milieu of the first
         film for the darker, crueller, more ironic odyssey of BABE:
         PIG IN THE CITY (imdb: animals / kids-and-family / sequel /
         talking-animal), doing for singing mice what Scream did for
         slasher films... and seeing Kathy "Waynetta Slob" Burke and
         Meryl Streep on the same screen may be the only reason for
         oestrogen-heavy Oirish blarney DANCING AT LUGHNASA (imdb:
         based-on-play / sisters) - no pronunciation info available
         at present, we suggest you try "Lufthansa" and the box
         office people will understand...

         DEAD TREE>> it's following in the steps of Martin "Invasion
         Of The Space Invaders" Amis, but LARA'S BOOK (Prima,
         UKP15.99) is one of the one-in-three terrible Douglas
         Coupland novels, with maybe one perceptive comment (around
         p18), dull tips (no Tomb Raider 3!), an appalling
         "action/adventure comic" that sounds like it's written by a
         12 year-old ("and then there was a hurricane and Lara got
         blown up into the air onto an aeroplane and she climbed in
         through the window") - plus many many renders of the
         overexposed heroine looking increasingly like a blow-up sex
         doll... despite the usual uncritical fawning over Tomb
         Raider, Myst etc, pricey video game coffee table tome
         RE:PLAY (Laurence King Publishing, UKP19.99) scores bonus
         points for including shots of Speccy classic Way Of The
         Exploding Fist, big maps of Sim City and Zaxxon, and
         printing Goldeneye grabs small enough so you can't see the
         horrible N64 anti-aliasing... taking a slightly broader
         view of life, John Horgan's THE END OF SCIENCE (Abacus,
         UKP8.99) purportedly ponders the future of empirical
         research via the hilarious technique of going round and
         interviewing the biggest names in philosophy of science
         (Karl Popper, Thomas Kuhn, Noam Chomsky, Steven Jay Gould,
         Marivn Minsky - even Roger "Quantum Consciousness" Penrose)
         - and then *taking the piss out of them*... could make
         useful reading before attempting Greg Egan's masterful
         compilation LUMINOUS (Millennium, UKP9.99), featuring
         post-cyberpunk science-heavy shorts from '93 to '98, and
         confirming Egan's rep as the *hardest* sci-fi author ever.
         Also good to see he's not spending all his time indexing:
         http://www.netspace.net.au/~gregegan/IZ/index.htm ... and
         finally, Andrew Calcutt's WHITE NOISE: AN A-Z OF THE
         CONTRADICTIONS IN CYBERCULTURE (Macmillan, UKP14.99) is
         pretty much the mix of provocative concepts and sociologist
         nonsense you'd expect from someone who's worked for Channel
         Cyberia and LM magazine (Living Marxism, not Leisure
         Monthly), and has learned everything from reading The
         Guardian, the Telegraph's Connected section, and .net
         magazine. Living up to its contradictory subtitle, the front
         even claims that the book is "Copyright 1999" so you've got
         a whole month to rip it off if you like...


                               >> SMALL PRINT <<

       Need to Know is a useful and interesting UK digest of things that
         happened last week or might happen next week. You can read it
       on Friday afternoon or print it out then take it home if you have
     nothing better to do. It is compiled by NTK from stuff they get sent.
         It is registered at the Post Office as "ahem! cough cough"
						http://www.dti.gov.uk/e-envoy

                                 NEED TO KNOW
            THEY STOLE OUR REVOLUTION. NOW WE'RE STEALING IT BACK.
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|| HARD NEWS || ANTI-NEWS || EVENT QUEUE || TRACKING || MEMEPOOL || GEEK MEDIA || SMALL PRINT ||