What's this all about? Well, our fearless Internauts forage the web each week, looking for useful, bizarre and fun web sites. Sign up now (it's FREE!), and you'll receive a weekly e-mail from Linky and Dinky in which they share their latest discoveries.

Linky considers himself something of an intellectual, and tends to choose culturally enriching, "brainier" sites to share with us. Dinky, on the other hand, cannot seem to keep a serious thought in his head, and quite often veers off into the bizarre, grotesque and far-fetched. Sometimes they bicker, but as long as you get a cool link or two out of the deal, who cares?

WAIT - Breaking News!
This just in from Linky & Dinky...
May 5, 1999

LINKY WRITES (calmly critical)

I should have been suspicious when Dinky asked for gasoline. Later, when I heard the explosion, I ran to his room and asked what happened. He told me he was trying to put some more gas in his search engine.

Let *me* do it! In this case, the religious icons are babe-a-licious beauties of stage and screen, with a pandering review, list of links and dozens of photos of each starlet. Of course, it's a thinly-veiled come-on for one of those pay-to-verify-you're-really-legal deals, but these days, what isn't?

OR these...
These folks, either
What is this hamster dance craze that's sweeping the nation, subverting our youth? It's downright unAmerican, unDemocratic and should be unLawful (if it's not already). Uncle Url mentioned something about gerbils one time, but no dancing hamsters. I'm especially disturbed by the latest fish and cow editions...

Easter eggs are not just the badly-painted things forgotten in your back yard, they're also fun little surprises that computer programmers have hidden in their software. This site lists them all - like hold down CTRL-ALT-L-D-N while reading this report and see a picture of Dinky naked!

That's what I say any time I let Dinky pick the movie we go to. I suspect he finds those winners at this site, dedicated to the worst movies of all time. Of course, my taste in cinema is much more sophisticated...

"WIRED" Magazine (my second-favorite bathroom reader) found that all words in the dictionary had been registered as domain names for potential web site use - all except these 1,700 and some. Webtrepreneurs - quit your bellyaching.com! You're gonna give me apoplexy.com! I hope no one will impugn.com my scurillous.com quipping.com, but even an unkempt.com amnesiac.com should be able to see the enormity.com of this dscovery.

As for me, I'm printing the list and bringing it to our next family Scrabble tournament. Sorry if I seem longwinded.com or loquacious.com.

Secret Clubhouse Bonus Links:
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LINKY & DINKY'S SECRET CLUBHOUSE, the secluded Cabal of L&D fans.
Now with over 370 Luscious Links!
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Of all the filth on the web (and I've seen a lot of it), this site is the filthiest - and the cleanest. If it were a movie, it would be rated "G". There's no exposed flesh at all, except her feet. She loves the feet, and loves to share - it troubles me.

Sure, anyone can find a Leonardo Di Caprio fan page or "Terrier World" web site, but what about free software? There are some good shareware sites, but *this* is the best site I've seen for one-stop FREE software browsing. Search over 75 million files (what is that in bytes?). *Some* people even post their copies of commercial programs for others to download. We don't recommend that, because it would be wrong.

Once burned, twice shy? I don't think so.

-- Linky, never burned, not at all shy

DINKY WRITES (still picking hard drive splinters out of his clothes)

I guess it's a good thing I was wearing my safety goggles, just like Uncle Url always told me. Too bad I didn't have them on my head...

Exploding whale? Sounds like one of those urban legends (like the guy my sister's friend's cousin knows, who knows a guy whose brother found the original Mexican pet), but it's true! We've got the videotape to prove it... Beaurocrats decided the best way to get rid of a rotting whale that had washed up on their shore was tt blow it to bits with dynamite - *we* get to watch as rotten blubber bits rain down on everyone in sight, crushing a car (!!) and stinking up everything. Let this be a lesson to you all.

"Fill 'er up, and 'Super-Size' it!" That's what you could say if you were driving around in this van, which is fueled by used cooking oil from fast food restaurants. The concept makes me a little queasy (I'm a strict vegetarian, you know), but I must say they put the "A" in "Alternative Fuel!"

"Dear Diary - today I walked on the moon." Kind of like peeking over the shoulder of the Apollo astronauts who went to the moon, you'll find transcripts, photos, real Audio and video, etc... Like most government functions, this site seems a little slow, but it's still hip.

Dinner at Linky and Dinky's house is a quiet affair, with time to reflect on the day's events. We also like to share little stories we've read - last night, Dinky brought us all to tears with the Celebrity Snack Palace's salute to Tom Jones. This mag is all over the place, but we also enjoyed the "Snit List" and the "Primal Scream Button".

Listing of tech support contacts for many companies. Pick one at random and see what they have to say for themselves. "So, how's the weather in Seattle?" Can also possibly be used to help solve problems with your computer or accessories, but what fun is that?

Bonus Area - Secret Clubhouse Bonus Area!

The following bonus picks are available only in
LINKY & DINKY'S SECRET CLUBHOUSE, the secluded Cabal of L&D fans.
Now with over 370 Wacky Web Sites!
Click Here for details (or if you're already a member).

"WACO" or "WACKO?"
I think David Koresh and his Branch Davidians picked the right town to live in, it was just the wrong pronunciation. Take a trip to the burned-out compound (I mean "home") where they met their fate, and have a look around, and speak to an actual Branch Davidian at this site maintained by a misguided tourist.

As seen on X-Files, the web's biggest resource for the world's greatest conspiracies. UFOs? Got 'em. Bigfoot? Seen 'im. Assassination? Absolutely. My favorite corner is the "rant of the week," covering everyone from Hillary to O.J.

Take my advice - no one takes you seriously when your eyebrows are burned off. I think the singed hair doesn't help much, either.

--Dinky, sticking to unleaded from here on out

Uncle Url's Pick of the Week:

Phone numbers in Afghanistan to Zimbabwe, and all points in between! Find old friends in other nations, or pick a country at random and make new friends! Also good for making expensive prank calls - remember, in Uruguay, English is a foreign language!

Linky & Dinky's weekly reports from the Web are free for all -- educational, entertaining, and very low in sodium. Subscribe now, or tell a friend.


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