cloning

Do it Yourself Projects

Human Cloning

Designer Genes!

If you're tired of giving your children up for adoption just because of their looks, this do-it-yourself project is just the ticket!

What to do first.

Ovulate

Scout out shopping malls and gyms for very good looking people. (This is usually where they congregate).

When you see the perfect specimen go up very close and scratch them. The arm is good but the inside of the mouth is perfect--it's just harder to do without them noticing.

Preserve the tissue under your fingernails.

Remove your unfertilized egg and remove all genetic material. Tip: It is best to do this at home and not at the mall. (You may also need a magnifying glass and a lab.)

Remove the nucleus from the goodlooking donor's cell and place it next to the egg.

Force a tiny spark of electricity across the two by scuffing your feet repeatedly on a nylon carpet. The two cells will then fuse.

Once the fertilized egg grows to 50 to 100 cells, implant the embryo in a woman's womb. (You, or perhaps your housekeeper, but it is just plain courteous to tell them in advance).

The egg thinks it's been fertilized and gets a full set of genes, it divides and becomes an identical twin!!

Voila!!!!

Note:

There has been some concern that when cloning, the chromosomes could match the age of the donor. for example a 10 year old would look like a 20 year old and a 20 year old would look like a 40 year old, as a result, the potential for cancer and heart disease increases will increase.

Also, genes that have been "turned off" that we do not know how to turn back "on".

If that does happen, it's probably best just to use the person for spare parts.

Wasn't that fun?