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Jessica

· Interview With One of Mikes Ladies.

 Streak

· Jessica Imposter Gets Busted.


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ChimpWEB Interviews Jessica Imposter

October 8, 1999

CNN Exclusive
Halifax, Nova Scotia

Streak
This is Chris (alias Streak)

note:
The content on this page is real. That is the real log, those are real emails. ChimpWEB is known for 'bending the truth' a bit, but when we talk or casually interview someone, it's all factual.

quick links

mikes girlfriend request page
girlfriend.phtml

interviews with Mike
#1 - mike.html
#2 - mike2.html

interview with Jessica
found out later to be this guy - jessica.phtml

questions, comments?
chimps@chimp.ca

Well it appears that we've been lied to again. This time by a sick pervert who pretends to be hot chicks on the net. A couple days after the Jessica interview this young man was busted in his ring of lies. He lied to Michael first and then proceeded to lie to ChimpWEB. magoo's post interview with "Jessica" follows.


Streak- okay, so you found out, the only thing i wish to know is how you found out the web page which caused my demise, did you receive an e-mail? Or were you cruising my site in the 10 minute window that it was linked to from my news page.
ChimpWEB- Chimp has almighty powers. And you dont. But it's all ok. The thing I would like from you now is... do you have any more Jessica pics?
ST- i do have another one, but i have been asked by somebody online who knows the girl to please take her picture down from my site
CW- Who are you anyways?
ST- i'll tell you if you tell me how you found out
CW- Through the log master. Us Chimps monitor it all. So you are..?
ST- Well, my real name IS Chris, and i had my comp. science teacher spread the news around all the classes, so i'm a bit famous, and everybody though it was hillarious
CW- Well I thought it was hillarious too, hence the interview. It doesn't take a genius to know you were not that girl. so you didnt make the chimps out to be fools. Where are you from Chris? Age?
ST- suffice it to say Texas, and i'm 16
CW- So has your popularity got you any action from chicks (or guys, I'm not sure which way you swing) in your class? Have you spread Chimp word? Made people hail in the name of the Chimp?
ST- naah, chicks kinda think that's cruel, and we have our own resident monki (yes that's how he spells it)
CW- Right on I've been to monki's page. So you exploited Mike for your own personal game, lied to him and then lied to us. How does that make you feel? Can you sleep at night?
ST- course i can, i never talked with micheal again after the first letter, and i had half of the school roaring in laughter
CW- Mr. Comedian, I see. And no chicks gave you anything even for this occasion? Must hurt your self esteem a bit. Is Jessica her real name? Does she live in Texas?
ST- actually, i was in a Kali (http://www.kali.net/ ) chat room, and after showing them micheals page (mirrored from monki.tzo.com), a conversation was started about how somebody should e-mail micheal pretending to be a girl, since nobody volunteered, i did it, actually i don't know her name, and friend in chat offered it, then sombody else told me to take down her picture
CW- I am very interested in getting more pictures and talking to her. To see her take on this whole situation. Because you did use her for your own gain which led to your demise. Since you are now playing with the big boys and cant keep up. I still can't believe that you got no action for this what so ever. Not that theres anything wrong with it, but are you gay?
ST- no, the chicks in my school saw it as preying on a poor defenseless innocent litte boy, that is why they didn't like it. no i am not gay
CW- Well Michael appears to be pretty innocent as i can tell. So many people have ripped him up and you're just another statistic. But when you send a pic like that with the email, ChimpWEB must look into it. So where do you go from here?
ST- apologize to this girl, aparantly she found out
CW- I'd love to do that too. Just need to find her. So you have no idea who or where she is?
ST- no
CW- You had better apologize to Mike too. He's really upset over this one. And anyone that f*cks with Mike f*cks with the Chimps.
ST- like i said, i never talked to mike again
CW- Like i said. You better. Explain your case and tell him how you lied and misled him. For the good of humanity do this. Did you make fun of ChimpWEB in your class too? Get some good laughs there. Bet you'll be suddenly quiet about the topic now. When they find out you were busted who knows what reaction they'll give. Also you might get some action from the chicks in your school if you show them how kind and compassionate you are when you apologize to poor innocent Michael.
ST- no, and everybody knew that i was busted today when my comp. science teach told them, but they still found it funny
CW- Was there a mass hailing to the chimp after that? To bring humility into the classroom?
ST- no
CW- Well I think that should be mandatory for next class. Before class begins ask Mr. Teacher if you can have a moment of the classes time. Then get everyone saying together, "Hail to the Chimp, hail to the mofo Chimp".. repeat four times then have a seat and continue with the class. I think it will improve your grades. Humbling yourself always makes you think clearer.
ST- well, so you know, the girl who is in the picture found out about it, and i have found out her name is steph, and have already written an apology to her where girl.htm used to be. nice talking to you, i'm off to my hot tub to heal my throbbing back after this season's first hockey practice
CW- You're a good man. You're repenting and that makes the Chimp smile. If you come across Steph again, please tell her that I would like to chat. Take it easy. And remember, keep your stick on the ice.