Pif Magazine - ISSN: 1094-2726
editor's desk | email | submission guidelines | books and reviews | masthead | mediakit | writing contest | writers only

get pif's newsletter

enter your email address
for free monthly newsletter

search pif magazine

The Best of Pif Off-line

Order your copy today

Writer's Online Workshops - Free Information that Can Help YOU Become a Better Writer


Pif Magazine
ISSN: 1094-2726

Published by:
Pif, LLC,
PMB 248
4820 Yelm Hwy SE
Suite B.
Lacey, WA 98503-4903


After eating egg creams, they both died in their hotel room. Two days later, they were found covered with a light dusting of flour. It was a typical New York City death - it wasnít in the tabloids, it didnít cause a stir. What was interesting about dying under cover of flour? True, they were interns at the hospital, practically doctors, but they had foreign names and scrunched up black beards. It was a pity they'd gone out for egg creams, but who could have expected this? The waiter who scooped the cream into the glass and swirled it into a drink? With an indifferent flick of a towel, he pointed them to their table. He didn't care about forgetting their napkins. When he heard about the deaths, he shrugged. So what if they died covered with flour or covered with cayenne pepper? It was their fellow medical student, Alphonso Zorndogger, who examined the scene of their death. He found the receipt for egg creams crumpled in one of their pockets. He went back to the restaurant and asked the manager who kept throwing up his hands. Zorndogger even called the health department. When he finally got through, a clerk told him the restaurant was up to date with its inspections. He forgot about it until one day at the hospital when he saw a patient with a pasty complexion lying on a gurney. Hadn't those foreign interns been covered with something when they died? He realized how morbid it was to be thinking about this while on his way to have dinner with a woman, who he had discovered on their first date, loved pepper. He thought somewhat ruefully of that woman grinding pepper over her steak.

Tell us what you think. Email talkback@pifmagazine.com

Ellen Lindquist performs "To Die of Egg Cream in New York City" at Atlanta Open Mics. Her props include a pair of foreign dolls which she sprinkles flour over; a wooden spoon she stirs inside a glass; a telephone; a miniature magnifying glass (for reading the receipt for egg creams); a towel she hides in one of her pockets; an apron hidden under her shirt (which she reveals at the appropriate moment); and a pepper grinder. Her poems and micro-fiction are forthcoming in Many Mountains Moving, Art Mag and Writer's Exchange.

get a printer-friendly version of this page

© 1995 - 2001 Pif Magazine All rights reserved | Copyright Notice and Terms of Use | Preferences