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Saturday, June 9 
IFILM : News & Features : Hollywood Email Archive : Hollywood Email

Hell Hath No Fury Like J.Lo's Magical Butt

May 16, 2001

What's in a name?

Quite a lot of acrimony, if the below email thread is to be believed. At issue: Jennifer Lopez, er, J.Lo, and her demands, er, wishes regarding publicity for the upcoming Angel Eyes. The apparent sparring partners are a flack at J.Lo's publicity firm (Rogers & Cowan) and a flack at J.Lo's Angel Eyes studio (Warner Bros.).

Let the dissing, er, discussions begin!


Lopez J.Lo's Magical Butt Caviezel

From: Martha Hudson (martha.hudson@warnerbros.com)
To: Lucille LeSueur (lucy@rogerscowan.com)
Sent: Friday, May 4, 2001, 2:08 p.m.
Subject: RE: "Angel Eyes" tweaks


Yes, we got your fax...I thought Alan [Nierob, the publicist] said Jennifer wanted to do anything to promote this movie.

Martha Hudson
Publicity Manager
Warner Bros. Pictures, International
4000 Warner Boulevard
Burbank, CA 91522-0001


*******
From: Lucille LeSueur (lucy@rogerscowan.com)
To: Martha Hudson (martha.hudson@warnerbros.com)
Sent: Friday, May 4, 2001, 2:22 p.m.
Subject: RE: "Angel Eyes" tweaks


Of course, she wants to do *anything*. (Thought you said you got the fax.) She merely wants you to meet her halfway.

*******
From: Martha Hudson (martha.hudson@warnerbros.com)
To: Lucille LeSueur (lucy@rogerscowan.com)
Sent: Friday, May 4, 2001, 2:30 p.m.
Subject: RE: "Angel Eyes" tweaks


Lucy, how can I put this? (I suppose I should phone, but I'm too upset):

According to this fax, you're asking us to pull all the one-sheets, posters and prints of the movie in order to bill Jennifer as "J.Lo" instead of her [expletive deleted] God-given name. This is *not* going halfway—unless she intends to pay for the millions out of her own pocket.

We are talking here about a movie that opens in two weeks!! The junket is tomorrow!! Are you guys smoking crack over there with Robert Downey?

The bottom line (and I've got backup on this): She signed onto this project as "Jennifer Lopez." She—so help me—is going to be billed as "Jennifer Lopez." We can't help it if she's decided to get a diva transplant.

*******
From: Lucille LeSueur (lucy@rogerscowan.com)
To: Martha Hudson (martha.hudson@warnerbros.com)
Sent: Friday, May 4, 2001, 3:22 p.m.
Subject: RE: "Angel Eyes" tweaks


Okay, I'm going to do you a big favor, Martha. I'm not going to repeat what you just said to J.Lo. But only because I don't want to see her go to jail FOR RIPPING OUT YOUR ORGANS WITH HER BARE HANDS!

I simply can't believe the lack of respect here. Maybe you can play these games with "James" Caviezel (or is it "Jim"? ... Gee, I guess he can't make up his mind, either.) But J.Lo, clearly, is no "James"/"Jim" Caviezel. She is the world's preeminent female celebrity. She has more talent in her ass than most people have in their tiny finger.

J.Lo is not just an actress. She is not just a singer. She is not just a celebrity. She is a movement. (Why do I even have to say this?) She feels extra-determined that "Jennifer Lopez" isn't where her movement is at these days. She is "J.Lo."

*******
From: Martha Hudson (martha.hudson@warnerbros.com)
To: Lucille LeSueur (lucy@rogerscowan.com)
Sent: Friday, May 4, 2001, 3:35 p.m.
Subject: RE: "Angel Eyes" tweaks


Okay, how about this as a compromise: I've seen this critic guy on the Internet. He calls Jennifer "J.Lo's Magical Butt." That enough of a "movement" for you?

P.S.: I'd like to see "J.Lo" try to rip out my organs. I hear my liver would grow back anyway. Which is more than I can say for her movie career after this POS opens.

*******
From: Lucille LeSueur (lucy@rogerscowan.com)
To: Martha Hudson (martha.hudson@warnerbros.com)
Sent: Friday, May 4, 2001, 5:05 p.m.
Subject: J.Lo ill


Miss Hudson:

This note is to inform you that J.Lo has taken ill and will be unable to attend Saturday's press junket at the Four Seasons in Beverly Hills.

She respectfully sends her regrets.

*******
From: Martha Hudson (martha.hudson@warnerbros.com)
To: Lucille LeSueur (lucy@rogerscowan.com)
Sent: Friday, May 4, 2001, 5:42 p.m.
Subject: RE: J.Lo ill


Dearest Lucy: Kiss, kiss. We're sorry to hear about poor Jennifer Lopez. At least we won't blow our kissing-and-fawning budget tomorrow. We'll need it for that Travolta movie [Swordfish] coming up.


In case you didn't already get it, "Hollywood Email" is not real. We made it up. We even made up most of the people. (Just so we're clear: We know there are many Hollywood people who aren't keepin' it "real," but we mean "not real" in the literal sense.) Like, duh, right?


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