Vinny, who put up staggering numbers at the thin air haven known as Coors Field, is somewhat less happy these days being in Tampa. You see, Tropicana Field does not quite have the thin air of Denver, Colorado and the true Castilla has showed up and done nothing. Now, Castilla's pal Larry Rothschild has been fired and replaced by Hal McRae. To make matters worse, the D-Rays have called up third base sensation, Aubrey Huff who appears to have placed vinny out to pasture. We caught up with Vinny on this Friday morning, April 20th to get his thoughts on life in the strip club capital of the world, Tampa, Florida.
--Chat Moderator, Dingus McGee
Moderator at 6:37 a.m. ET
We are now taking questions for Vinny.
RalphWiggum4ever at 6:39
Vinny, you were never that good. How does it feel that living in Florida
finished you off so quickly like this?
Vinny Castilla at 6:41 a.m.
Look, punk, I am one of the best damn third baseman in all of Baseball. I
can still cite you my numbers from Denver and I was really good there.
RalphWiggum4ever at 6:45
Uh, Vinny, you don't get on base anymore and you have stopped hitting for
average. Let's face it, you suck and you couldn't even carry Chipper Jones'
Vinny Castilla at 6:47 a.m.
Kid, I don't have to take this....Larry will defend me. He has supported me
since day one!
Chat Moderator at 6:48 a.m.
Um, Vinny, Larry was just fired and replaced by Hal McRae who's starting
Aubrey Huff instead.
Vinny Castilla at 6:52 a.m.
That's not going to last. I know where Hal lives and if he doesn't
cooperate, I am heading up to Stamford to kick Brian McRae's ass.
Chat Moderator at 6:53 a.m.
Next Question for Vinny...
LamarsBar at 6:55 a.m. ET
Vinny, you have just been traded to the Orioles where you will back up
Ripken. No joke, you should be receiving the fax right now.
Vinny Castilla at 6:59 a.m.
Chuck, I can't believe you traded me to a bad team to be a back up!
LamarsBar at 7:00 a.m. ET
That's what you are NOW, Vinny. Don't let the door hit your sorry butt on the
way out. Hey, you wanted to be traded. Apparently no one thought you had
any talent and Angelos was the only taker.
Vinny Castilla at 7:04 a.m.
What did I get traded for?
LamarsBar at 7:06 a.m. ET
A box of Rice Krispie treats and two tickets to 'Cats.'
Vinny Castilla at 7:09 a.m.
What??? Are you kidding me! I love 'Cats!!!!' Can I have the tickets? Please
LamarsBar at 7:11 a.m. ET
No, Vinny, the 'Cats' tickets are mine but I will give you two tickets to
the Michael Bolton-Kenny G reunion tour if you are interested?
Chat Moderator at 7:15 a.m.
Well, I guess that's the end of this dicussion. On that note, we wish Vinny
the best out in Baltimore and I am sure Devil Rays will be relieved, uh, I
mean happy for him to continue his career.
Thanks and tune in next week
for our chat with former Dodger Manager Tommy
Disclaimer: This is obviously a joke. All resemblances to persons living or dead, except for reasons of satire, is coincidental. Vinny Castilla did not participate in a chat, and we don't even have the software. I, Mac Thomason, had nothing to do with this. It was all Alex. Send your nasty, loathsome, obscene, and borderline pornographic email to him.
As for the citizens of Tampa, Florida... Alex used to live there, and he hated it. Complaints from the Tampa/St. Petersburg Chamber of Commerce may also be sent to Alex.
Castilla has not actually been traded to the Orioles -- not yet, anyway. Cats closed several months ago. Complaints may be sent to Andrew Lloyd Webber.
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