Lucha TV Report for
February 27th, 2001
EMLL
[Note: I’m doing this report a little impaired because the sound for
the lucha shows this week was terrible. It sounded like they turned
the volume on the TV up after hitting the mute button. So my copies of the
shows are completely silent.]
(Arena Coliseo) Villano IV, Mr Niebla, Brazo del Plata vs. Emilio Charles,
Scorpio Jr, Bestia Salvaje
Primera Caida- Porky does a sexual dance with his ring girl while
entering the ring, thus producing a terrible mental image. Villano IV locks
up with Scorpio Jr to start the match, and they actually do some good matwork.
Villano IV had a title shot against Scorpio for his IWRG Hwt. Belt a while
back. Porky then tags in and does his typical comedy spots with
the Guapos, finally knocking the wind out of their sails with a Bronco Buster.
As Scorpio gets to his feet, he gets hit with Niebla’s cartwheel reverse
tope and then tied up in La Neblina, while Porky squashes Salvaje with his
planet-like ass.
Segunda Caida- Guapos start triple teaming anyone who enters
the ring. They almost get the Villano in la careta, but Porky breaks that
up and the tecnicos go back on offense. Niebla takes out Salvaje with a pescado,
while Villano IV ties up Scorpio in the corner, so Emilio takes the
oppurtunity to low blow Porky…. here comes Shocker for the save…
No! Shocker attacks Porky while he is down, getting the Guapos DQed.
[.25] Your standard boring Coliseo match, though I thought the Shocker
run-in was a run-in done right for once. He purposely attacked the tecnicos
so his team would lose, since he is having "problems" with the addition of
Emilio Charles .
(Arena Mexico) Ultimo Guerrero, Rey Bucanero, Tarzan Boy vs. Juventud
Guerrera, Atlantis, Negro Casas
Primera Caida- The teams start this off cleanly, as Juventud starts
the match with Tarzan Boy. Juventud does some kipuppy armdrags while Tarzan
does a lot of posing and waistlock takedowns… not my choice
for the opponent for Juventud to work against, but hey he looks like (a roided
up) Billy Kidman, maybe Tarzan can be carried like him too. Next Atlantis
and Bucanero do some simple, solid work, Atlantis would finally put
a headscissors on Bucanero and use his arms to spin him about like a helicopter,
in a cool spot. What made it cooler was the fact Rey’s nuts hit the
bottom rope being thrown from it and the announcers made a big deal
and even argued if it should be a low blow disqualification or not.
Now Ultimo and Casas are in, Casas shows all of his moves, such as
the mighty kick and chop, then catches Guerrero in a side armbar and gets
the submission. Juventud enters and suprises Bucanero who was sprinting to
break that hold with a flip-up into a facejam for the pinfall.
Segunda Caida- Infernales have to regroup outside the ring after Atlantis
sends each one of them to the floor in a different manner. Whatever they
said in the huddle pays off because they are able to blindside him in the
ring and then start their trademark three-on-one offense. Atlantis gets press
slammed on Tarzan’s boots, Casas gets powerbombed, double flying headbutted
and posed on top of, then Juventud gets flapjacked, powerslammed, and placed
on the turnbuckle for a killer Reverse Superplex (welcome to EMLL, Juvy!)
from Mr. Guerrero and that’s that.
Tercera Caida- Infernales continue to hold down the ring for themselves,
until Atlantis pulls Guerrero out as he runs the ropes. Casas uses
some more of his impressive offense, while Juventud hits a great missile
kick on Bucanero. The tecnicos then brawl outside the ring a bit, including
Atlantis monkey flipping Guerrero on his back on the floor. In the ring,
Juventud and Tarzan Boy have a bit of a showdown. First Tarzan hits
a big clothesline, and looks for a press slam but Juvy flips out and that
starts a waistlock sequence. Juventud then does a backflip into a reverse
cradle, and then a bulldog out of a wheelbarrow suplex like pickup for two
counts. Tarzan then knocks him back down with a clothesline and hits
a pumphandle powerslam for two. He tries another but Juvy slides down his
back, hits a kick to the midsection and then a JUVY DRIVER! One… nope
not even(I would have so loved to see Tarzan no-sell Dr Wagner’s version,
oh boy would he be in for a beating) as Tarzan decides to no-sell the move
as he staggers to his feet, Juvy gets a running start and does a rana, then
spins around and takes Tarzan Boy over the ropes, also pulling down his sweatpants
along the way. So those guys are on the floor, Guerrero procures a full nelson
but Casas elbows out, Atlantis hits headscissors dizzying Guerrero, then
Bucanero enters the ring and gets spun into La Atlantida while Casas hits
his Casita so that the tecnicos win the match!
[full point] Despite Tarzan Boy’s incredibly jerkish no-selling
of the most protected move in lucha, this was a pretty good match. Juventud
has fit in with EMLL pretty well so far while the Infernales continue to
be the most reliable tag team out there…
MOMENTOS ESTELARES-
Zeta with a no-hands tope con giro with full-spin(meaning he did a complete
sommersault over the ropes) !!! Insane spot, he better be careful doing that
though…
Rencor Latino with a spinning underhook faceslam which almost landed Tigre
Blanco on his head.
Ricky Marvin armdrags Virus off the apron onto his back, Virus gets back
up and takes a PERFECT top rope quebrada into the seats. Gala should air
these matches instead of the worthless junk from Coliseo.
El Veneno with an assisted over the top rope tope con giro
Ultimo Guerrero with a flawless reverse superplex
Shocker with a backspringboard into a 180 dropkick while Scorpio does a camel
clutch.
Rayo de Jalisco, Villano III, Perro Aguayo vs. Universo 2000, Cien Caras,
Mascara Ano 2000- Cut to the chase, they did almost nothing but brawl,
eventually Perro reversed a rollup on Universo and got the winning pinfall
then once again challenged him to a mask vs. hair match.
[no points] It’s a Perro match!
AAA
The show begins with a horribly bad skit in which Moronas walks around this
haunted house with these screwed up red lights and is being stalked by monsters
of all sorts. See I don’t have a problem with a skit like this it’s
just that…
(From Monterray) Los Monsters (Uncle Lucas, Franky, Phantasma de la Opera
c/ Chucky) vs. Alebrije, Mascara Segrada, and La Parka Jr.- Pena has
a lot of fucking nerve to run a freakshow like this in Monterray of all places.
Let me tell you about the Monsters. Uncle Lucas(supposed to be Fester) is
an amazingly fat guy in a fester outfit with a shitty mask I could buy at
Spencers Gifts that has this insane heroin shooting grin on it. He tends
to make it worse by hopping around and dancing. Franky is Frankenstein, in
Black Jeans and a leather coat no less, while Phantsma de la Opera is you
guessed it…. THE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA!!! OHHH!! And let us not forget
Chucky, as to make this little ensemble of poop complete, they took one of
the dwarves(Gulliver?) and had him dress like Chucky the Doll from Child’s
Play and a horrid WCW angle you might have seen. And Chucky isn’t
even viscous here, the most he does is kick Kuije around, but who doesn’t!
The Monsters get pinned in the first fall, then in the second FRANKY shows
his massive strength by throwing Segrada over the ropes onto Parka on the
floor getting them DQed. This was just… ugh.
[zilch] An early candidate for worst match of the year and completely embarrasing.
This should never have aired.
(Rerun from Sn. Luis) Mascara Segrada Jr, Oscar Sevilla, Pathfinder vs.
Kuervo, Apache, Cementario- They have aired this three, maybe four times
now. You’d think they do something productive with that extra 30 minutes
on Galavision like maybe show an undercard match but nooooooo…..
(From Monterray) Headhunter I, Psicosis, Electro Shock, Maniaco
vs. Silver Cat, Picudo, Espiritu, Jerry Estrada-
Primera Caida- LLL takes control early, until Maniaco accidently slides
under the ropes into the Vatos hands, they toss him into the crowd
and then control the match, eventually Espirtu would end up on Maniaco’s
shoulders, Psicosis climbed the top ropes to deliver a doomsday device, but
Espiritu did a victory roll on Maniaco and Psicosis hit nothing except the
mat, allowing Silver Cat to hit a splash off the top for the pinfall.
Segunda Caida- Estrada works over Psicosis with some powerbombs, Espiritu
armdrags Maniaco a little bit, Silver cat does a few headsicssors to Electro
Shock then makes him take a salida to the floor. Estrada gets back in but
gets double teamed by Maniaco and Psicosis, who give him the Mamalukes old
alley oop powerslam(only poorly) and get the pin, while Headhunter splashes
Picudo off the top rope.
Tercera Caida- It looks like Picudo was hurt from that big fat splash
off the top(Boy, I could NEVER have seen that coming) so he spends some the
time on the floor. The Vipers have an easy 4-on-3 advantage and use
it for a bit then the Vatos and Jerry fight back. All four Vatos combine
to backdrop the Headunter, which takes him out of the match so they can enjoy
a 4 on 3. And all is well until Haytor, Pimpi, Nygma, some kickboxing guys,
Ninjas, Aliens, the roman legion do a run-in, ending the match on a "WTF?"
note.
[zero points] A big waste of time.
Overall: [1.25 EMLL - 0 for AAA] Well EMLL was the same story, one
good match and a bunch of fluff, I expect that until the timeslot is expanded
or Perro leaves. AAA put on the most boring, crappy show they have in quite
a while. A re-run, a comedy match as funny as patricide, and a lame brawl
ending with a run-in of some guys we will not see again for another month
or so. I want my IWRG tapes, damnit.