Overview
"You're probably wondering how Beavis and Butt-head got into state college. Well, it
wasn't through hard work and dedication. They're just on a field trip with Mr. Van
Driessen and the rest of the class, learning about the benefits of higher education.
So what's the challenge? Field trips are easy, right? Not this
one. Sure, there's the standard busy-work assignment, but here's the hard part: you have
to help Beavis and Butt-head try to score with college chicks.
Beavis and Butt-head get several opportunities to hit on chicks
during the field trip, but their best bet is the college party after the field trip. And
they have to complete their assignment before they can go to the party. Their assignment
is to perform tasks for different staff members and get their signatures. Once Beavis and
Butt-head get all the signatures, it's party time."
When I originally received this game for review, my first thought
was, "Why me?" Don't get me wrong, I've watched -- and even enjoyed
-- Beavis
and Butt-head. But in the computer industry, there's a long history of mediocre to
horrible games based on previously created licensed characters -- the recent South
Park game is a good example. I'm not sure why, but when you set out to translate a
popular show into an entertaining computer game, the odds are overwhelmingly against you.
Gameplay, Controls, Interface
The controls are very simple. When you move your mouse over a
usable object, a thought balloon will pop up over it with the action options inside.
Little icons let you know whether you can use, examine or talk to someone or something. An
L or R beneath the icon lets you know whether it is controlled by a left or right mouse
click. You also have a paper bag for inventory storage. I found myself playing Hunt the
Hot Spot by waving my mouse around the screen to see if I could find the clickable objects
in a scene -- annoying, because often objects which looked usable were not, and other
objects which looked like background graphics were useful. This is true of many adventure
games, though.
A quality adventure game does not give away premature hints about
an object, whether it's important or just scenery. At one point, I was in the biology lab
and clicked on a snake, thinking, "Cool! Maybe I can grab this snake." The
response was something about not being able to get the eggs. "Eggs?" I thought.
"Why do I care about snake eggs?" Of course, this was a dead giveaway that I
would need snake eggs later on. When an adventure game is well thought out, you will get
different responses to an object based on what you've already accomplished within the
game. No such planning was in evidence here.
One thing I can tell you is that while I was playing this game,
it warped my mind. Note to married men: if you do play this game, do not fall into the
trap of Beavis-and-Butt-speak. I once made the mistake of calling my wife
"Buttmunch." Being chased by a cleaver-brandishing redhead is not conducive to a
happy home.
Graphics
Beavis and Butt-head Do U. is an extravaganza of
cheesy 256-color graphics, but then the original cartoon looks pretty cheesy to begin
with, so that's understandable. (Did you really expect exquisitely-rendered 3D graphics of
the Great Cornholio?) Less understandable are the weird visual glitches throughout the
game. Regardless of the quality of illustration, I expect game graphics to work reasonably
well. Not here. Every three minutes or so, I'd get a mouse bleed-through -- my mouse
cursor would flash on the screen, and I could see my Windows background through the game.
Other occasional glitches cropped up, such as palette shifts. These kinds of technical
problems shouldn't be happening, especially in a game that seems to have 5-year-old
graphic technology.
Audio
"Heh-heh, heh-heh, heh-heh, this sucks! Heh-heh,
heh-heh." No, really! The audio blows chunks. The game appeared to use an archaic
audio engine that only allowed one sound at a time, so there was no such thing as a quick
conversation. Part of the Beavis and Butt-head experience is their silly comments
and sniggering, but after a while, conversations like this will drive you up the wall:
"Heh-heh, heh-heh, heh-heh, this sucks! Heh-heh, heh-heh." Pause. "Heh-heh,
heh-heh, heh-heh, heh-heh, yeah, heh-heh, let's find some sluts and score, heh-heh,
heh-heh, heh-heh." Pause. "Heh-heh, heh-heh, heh-heh, yeah, heh-heh, heh-heh,
cool, heh-heh, heh-heh." I don't know why Darth Vader kept saying, "Luuuke ...
<breathe> join meee ... <breathe>." He could have broken Luke's will in
five minutes flat with "Heh-heh, heh-heh, Luke, heh-heh, the Dark Side is cool,
heh-heh, heh-heh, Yoda sucks, heh-heh, heh-heh, heh-heh."
The game does have some original soundtracks by various (loud)
bands such as the Newlydeads, Union, Testament, Boiler, Crowbar and Los Gusanos. You only
get to listen to these tracks while you're in the DJ booth on campus, though.
System Requirements
Windows 95/98, P-133 or better (166 recommended), 16 MB
RAM (32 MB recommended), 2 MB video card (4 MB recommended -- but why?), 4X CD-ROM drive
(8X recommended), SoundBlaster-compatible sound card, mouse, and the patience of Job. The
system requirements are surprisingly high for a game of this dubious quality.
Parental
Warning
Rated T for older teens and adults with a sophomoric sense of
humor. As MTV likes to put it, "Beavis and Butt-head are not role models. They're not
even human." They're not subtle, either. The toilet humor, vulgar language and
frequent references to "scoring with college sluts" make this an inappropriate
game for children. Heck, this review alone is worthy of a T rating.
Documentation
Another 12-page jewel case manual. The phrase
"piss-poor" comes to mind, but that would be crass. The documentation also fails
to mention a highly critical commandthe space bar. Pressing it allows you to skip a
conversation. When you're trying several wild ideas to see if they work, it's annoying to
hear Butt-head call Beavis a dumb-ass for the umpteenth time.
Bottom Line
Beavis and Butt-head Do U. is relatively
inexpensive for an adventure game, but the word that keeps coming to mind is
cheap -- just cheap. Frankly, I can't recommend plopping down money for this unless you
are a dyed-in-the-wool Beavis and Butt-head fan and have to own everything Mike
Judge has ever created. I breezed through this game in four hours, and the only reason why
it took me that long was because I tried every possible action I could, even patently
absurd ones. The game made me laugh exactly once. I'm sorry, but if you're going to cough
up $30 for a game, you'd better get at least two laughs out of it. I give it a score of 21
because it is a pitiful game by today's standards, but it did make me laugh.
Review Posted On 20 May 1999.
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