Real "issues" with The Real World
By: Ryan Muldowney

The Real World has been on the air for ten plus years, and, let's face it, has reached the "Fat Elvis Stage" of its run. What started out in 1992 as ground-breaking television has evolved into a contrived, lame, and uninteresting docu-drama. While the first season cast of New York was fresh and contained real people, the latest casts have been nothing but hybrid rehashes of previous cast members. During the first few seasons, the cast alone made the show. I'll never forget people like Andre, Heather, Jon, Judd, or Pedro. Those people, plus many other interesting cast members, are what made the show. Compare that to the last few seasons, where the producers have to create situations to make the show even remotely dramatic.

Unfortunately, two of the most annoying Real World alumni recently visited Slippery Rock University. As much as I would have loved to see ANY of the housemates from the first three seasons (the best seasons), I was stuck with Puck from San Francisco, and Julie from New Orleans. I knew it was going to be a long night. I was reluctant to go, but I finally decided to just because they were cast members.

Though Puck was part of my favorite season of The Real World, he is regarded as the most hated housemate of all time (among viewers and cast alike). Julie is one of the most annoying cast members in any season. Her constant whining, bitching, moaning, crying, etc., and being a mormon, but not acting like it, made it quite a chore to watch her. But, they were here, so I made it my duty as a former Real World fan to observe the event to see if anything good would come of it.

It was uneventful for the most part. Puck and Julie came out and the audience cheered. Puck, now with hair a little past his shoulders, brought out a tray of cookies to share with the audience. They took a seat on a couch that was placed there for them, and started talking. They partook in some "witty banter" about things that Puck should have grown out of by now. Namely, farting, pooping, and homosexuals. Puck was obviously trying to be funny, but his jokes often came up flat. Most of what he said had to do with bodily function humor, and gay bashing. It was really annoying, and I was starting to see why the six other San Francisco house mates couldn't handle him. He did make a few funny comments, though. His commentary on the music played during his season's episodes now that its in syndication was hilarious, saying that the music of him riding off into the sunset was changed from Stone Temple Pilots to elevator music.

He did seem to grow up just a tad, though. He now has a son named Bogart and a serious girlfriend (though how any woman would be able to stand him is beyond me). He is still obviously a loser, working as a guy who paints over grafiti on walls in the inner-city. He often talked about how he fed the homeless, which seemed like he was trying to justify what a jerk he is.

Julie didn't seem as annoying as she was on the show. I say as because when she talked, it was like she was preaching to us. She was giving us advice on things like sex, drinking, abstinence, and being a "good person." I have a hard time taking the advice of her seriously just because she was on a television show. Overall, she didn't seem that bad though. I'd hang with her.

There were some juicy tidbits that dealt with The Real World and MTV in general. The most interesting piece of info came about when Puck brought up that they changed a rule because of him. Before he came about, drug use was allowed, just not in the house. After Puck smoked weed all the time, the producers changed the rule, prohibiting cast members from using drugs at any time during their tenure in the house. Julie said that it was hard for one of her male cast mates to quit cold turkey. We all wondered which guy it was, but we got our answer a few minutes later. She accidentally let it slip that Danny, the token gay of the season, was a HUGE POT HEAD. Julie was visibly upset that she let it slip, but we assured her we wouldn't tell anyone. Well, there goes that promise.

They also said that they have no respect for MTV, the network that made them C-list celebrities. They criticized the fact that they rarely play actual music on MTV, something that I agree with them on. Puck made a funny comment asking what WWF wrestling has to do with Music Television.

Puck and Julie then went on a tangent, telling us why we should NEVER, EVER be on The Real World. It is a hassle to go anywhere, and you have no privacy, no television, and you are put under a microscope. Julie also said the editing is terribly manipulated and things are put on the show in a different order than it happened.

When asked what they didn't like about their cast, Julie said that it was hard to get along with people at times, and she also commented on David having a horrendous odor that smelled like tuna fish and sweat combined. Puck said that all of his cast were assholes, and he only talks to Rachel from San Francisco. I wanted him to get into why they were assholes, but he didn't, because HE IS THE ASSHOLE.

They then discussed more "life issues," which I could care less about, in reasons stated before. Namely, I don't care about their opinions. I came there to hear stuff about the show they participated on, not their view on world events. Overall, I'm glad I attended the show. Although Puck's annoying jokes and Julie's preaching did bug, it was an interesting look into two cast members. It was definitely worth the price of admission (free), and I had a good time. Didn't really learn anything, but I wasn't expecting to. After all, they are two of the most rediculously annoying cast members of all time. But hey, it's better than meeting no cast members at all.