PETE 0R PIed : Peat-Ash"
PETE 0R PIed : Ashsplits"
PETE 0R PIed : pEAT bASH
PETE 0R PIed : Peat Cured Comp
PETE 0R PIed : Peat DilemMa
PETE 0R PIed : Peat's EYEma mODE
(^This particular rodent is one of the aged rat packers , named PeatCH,
(^who lives down in the bowls of the tri lateral pig stuffers tale.--
(^anyway, I thought I'd spit this to you.
(^if/when you want any other stories, let me know.
(^OH! and.. tHERE.
have a gander at this Peatch's stored rye tail...
about where children came from
pEATe0R'sp1ashingding brian prosser( transaid may 24,1998)
Nebraska version... edit shun A
PEATCH:: (sitting inde flute chair)far future....
" I wanted to have mine own....
" That's what EYEmah's playin'...
" Peate or pump's(kin)s bouy/boy..
" a pump kin'sHellouse...."
The scAIRye jack-0H-LandTurn (woe)man.
In his other postmod life.
(image of huge pumpkin)
And that's Jack/le ant turn's wifehouse.
Eyemah Mod's H0USE of stored rage.
Subject:#p0pA: aka Peat -Ash
part won: the splitting up of old friends..
Peate R. P1ED:
(who was also Pete the piper, of later peckled frame)
Pickled peckled fame.
and he also becomes a pied piper, pre earl liar yearns..
Peat R. Pied :
(a penny whistle playing cook's helper)
Used to be a minstrel in the court of a king.
Peat was a close friend of one of the footmen.
The footman was one Clod Hopper.
What's his name? - Claude Hopper?...no.
That was his position. His job title.
His NAME was Ashley Wednesday.
He tried to steal away Ella
before the prince could find her,
Because HER nick name was Cinder
and his was Ashley.
Ash Wednesday and Peate R. Peyesquire both worked
for this once upon a time prince/now king at one time.
And because Ashley tried to steal Cinder Ella,
when the prince (now king) had
sent out the footmen to try and find her,
both are now unemployed.
Ashley was the one footman with the shoe,
with the shoe from boot hill.
The shoe that was going to be used to prove
who the prince should marry.
and Ashley was considered too old to care
about who was playing footsies with who.
when Ashley found her, he went,
"Ohm...mEYE!... oh mine....
" Cinder Ella, Ashley Wednesday..
" we are destined to be together...!
" yOur names are the puddling proof! "
He at that time, was a little old man, you know.
like in his sixties.
But he was going to escape the minutia militia,
with CinderElla, all the same.
He tries to take her away with him.
But Ash get's caught.
He then has to go live in a dung heap.
(^see late: or^))
MeanWhile... back in the court Kitchen:
-- R Peye was poetizing at an open mike nite:
Practice /auditions for the ball's fiddlers and fifepipes:
Peat R Peye tries to stand up for Ashley by spoken wording the tale,
then concludes with these lines:
" love conqures all thingKs. "
" Awed things are fair in love. "
"War'em, if they can't give a Fuck."
Not the right thing to say
especially what with Ashley being a kingsman scout.
I mean...Ashley's work is to do warish things.
((....li'l Peatey should have stuck to his penny whistling.
as a Clodd Hopper, Ashley's former job
was to clear out farmlands
to make room for the war roads.
Soe.back to Ashley:
After his break for a farmland's daughter,
and being far too old to pull off the job..
Ashley gets dishonerably discharched from his post.
with full pompuss ceremony,
Both Ash and Peate are stripped of their badged honors:
Ash for trying to covertly step beyond his bounds,
(^by up staking and claiming Ellah to be his zone^)
Peate, for overtly spreading propaghandi-liked prose.
Peate has his cook ladle broken in two.
His aprentice baker's chef hat
is ripped/punched through,
and left at his feet in threeway tatters.
His penny whistle stomped on. and he is told
to never play again.....nor try to become a cooker.
Ash ends up becoming another of the
tri-lateral pig stuffer's
can-do schtick mackerals..
s.Old man living by the side of the road.
With weeds. And dung.
(...but that's another told tale....)
about Ashes being torn apart
by military people
wanting to build a road
right through the middle
of his home.
(^soe? see the same t0ld stored rye tale:
or go on to pHeartache of Ash Wedendzdaze Clodd Hopper^)) >< I'll see what foOdder I can provide (^hmmn.. spleck ` foOdder `= fodder, foolery, footers, footgear, footmen, footwear, foamier, folders, fondled, fondles, footer, footless, footmark, footrest, footsore,+ footwork. (^that was enough 4(k)now, thanks... ================================================== (^ I feel I need a podiatrist from all the stepping stones (^ I keep stumbling across and thru. kn0W:) ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
((^**** ah. STOREDryeTALE:
ASH WEDN'SDAY'S CLODHOPPER
(^ (^There was a crooked man, who walked for crooked miles.. ((^.. let's call him Ashley; a retired kingsman's scout. (^After being let go on a charge of trying to run off with a queen, (^Ashley had set up camp in a dung heap; (^ building his house of clayfeet and timberwolves. (^Shin deep in manure, he started slapkicking the shit of his journey (^ around, looking for a lost slipped off hiking boot.. (^ As he spotted and was about to retrieve his lost ankle bracer , (^ a bunch of soldiers came stamping along the waterfront; (^straight through his home: sloshing mud. (^A newly enlisted recruit ((let's call Him/er "NewBs")) (^ had liquid soap seeping out of His/er backpack. (^Now, along with the tirading downpour (^ that always comes with reigns for "truth, just is(s), (^ and the AmWayReCAnter 's life, (^ the scrubbing bubbles left foamy crests (^of rootbeer lapping across Ashman's field of vision: (^and the boot off his right foot still sinking in the fertilizer. (^ " HAY, old man! Watch where we're STEPping! ", ((^> complained the newbe wannabe.<^)) ((^*soap still dripping out of Newb's package of trix cereBRal cortex.. ((^ dirrectly into the feces of Ashley's floorboards.^)) (^Newb: )" Can't you just wipe the brown lipstick off your face )" and get back in line?! Don't. USe see? )" 'eWE're on a MISSION! (^Ashley: (*looking around his abode..., (* as soldiers of fortune clammer through..) ( "Uh...*heehehh.. you're also IN one..mine. (^Newb: )" WHAT??! What do you mean?! )" This is OUR path! Git out of the WAY! (^Ashley: (still lying on the earthen floor of his retirement home, (Newb's foot on his back, holding him flatfaceted in the dirt.) )" I was.. just.. looking for my boots. )" they were over tHere, by the fireplace..hEarthSpace. )" see.. this place used to be my home.. (^Newb: ("well, it ISn't, anymore! Shove OFF! (" besides, if this were your house.." (^Ashley: )".. home.. I said home. (^Newb: (unhearing) (" ..you sure do keep a MESS of things! (" Why don't you clean UP this place? (" It looks like a PIGs'tie! and... ((**holding His/er nose, eyes clenched.) (^Newb: (unsee/no tasting) (" EEeewww. OWeee!.. the smell.. " (^Ashley: )".. now that you mention it, )" this once WAS a farmer's barn, B4.. (^Newb: (" What do you got? SHIT fer BRAINS? (^Ashley: )"... maybe..but in any case, I do for floors.. (^Newb: (" SHUT UP ! (glarring down an upturned nose at Ash..) (" I wouldn't allow you IN my house, (" let alone let you do MY FLOORS! (" The ` meer ` THOUGHT of it makes me SICK! (^Ashley: )"... maybe..but in any case, I use fertilizer for footpaths. (^Newb: ("you argue and interupt all the time, SEE?!! ("When's the last time you shut upped and LISTened?!! ================================================= ((^yuppers.. jest getting started.. will cont. later)) ================================================= **((^this goes on for some thyme end treason.. (^ houses growing mushroom clouds, seedlings packeting whallups, (^and jackle bean sprouts out of non-linoleumed footpaths: (^some homes are not houses.. (^and sum houses do not equate homelife. (^but, the path(s) of life continue to grow and change.. (^life,death,gestation periods and mediatorial meditations all. (^swooner nor latterial motifs combine (^ to create the grand chaos of litebreaths, and darkened memories. (^shallow grave gasps can turn into twittery laughter (^ if repeated incessantly...pixies come take your breath awy with... (^.."THEM".. ((^..laugh it up, funny bouy.. yer killing me. <--vinny on the mark of Y. (^* jestme thinks reality only SEEMS to destroy (y)Our dreams.. (^ actually.. it can be used to CREATE them... ((^..inert dreams, baby. <--vinny : X it spotmarks.
0RE:... move a HEADERS
Peate R. Peye, on the other hand....
pEAT 0RE pEYEbeam gets stuck^))
(^yet have another chapter of the other story..
(^as thanks for dreamslate starter.
party down at Peate R. Peye square..
B4:pEATe 0RE pEYEash^))
Subject:#p0pB: aka PeatBash
(part2 of many sordids..)
Peate R. Peye, on the other hand....
Moves into the inner slum of an England city.
Still plays his pipes some.
but he's lonely.
He's a little excenntric
and he wishes to have children around him.
he starts baking pumpkin pies,
And putting them out on his door step
trying to lure children over to visit.
Peate plays his little penny whistle flute,
(the one stompped on
when he was let go of by the court)
every time he puts them out on the front porch.
(Kind of like a farmer's wife ringing a bell )
(to annonce to the farmhands that diner is served.)
rats show up and start eating these pies.
All of the rats start to show up and eat the pies.
At first, he's a little upset with this.
But, beggers aren't always choosers..
\he ends up thinking..
"well.. at least they're better than NO company."
he plays his little pipe..
and the rats put up with him playing his little pipe.
La la la....
The problem is that the children of the neighborhood
are bored and typical little kids.
Doing crazy shit,
doing stuff that their parents wouldn't want to know about.
sneaking into unsafe buildings...
playing with untamed animals
that are known to cause the black death.
It's kind of a rights of passage
for the five year olders from the seven yearlings.
YunGuns ,in order to be accepted by the YunGuns,
have to try and pick up rats.
over at peter pieds house...:
Rats are always showing up.
kids start to show up too.
and Peate is so over joyed that he plays his pipe
and hes all happy.
Some of the kids are kind of nodding at him, and saying,
"yeah your funny he ha ha..".
so they can hang out and play with..
it becomes the right of passage to go
to Peate, the scurryed man's den
and pet the rats
and eat the pie
and listen to the pipe playing.
And listen to the old man talk..
"--- back when I was youngunner....
" I used to be a minsteral
" in the court of this king.
" I would play these little ditties. . . . ."
(It was like going to a bad poetry session. . . .
( You got this guy getting up there. . .
( playing his little penny whistle. .
( trying to be a wonderful showman.
And yet... the kids put up with it,
because they could pet the rats...
and the rats put up with it..
because Peate feeds them.
They (both rats and children)
become semi tame.
(k) N 0 W . . . . . . . . . . .
Date: Wed, 17 Jun 1998 02:41:19 -0700
From: see_D_pr0phF1TS <email@example.com>
Subject:#p0pC: aka Peat Cured Comp
aka:Peat 0R pEYE chillins
(part 3 of 4)
((or.."what happens when all is TOO well.."..))
They (both rats and children)
become semi tame.
(k) N 0 W . . . . . . . . . . .
unbenounced to everyone..
that particular whistle,
the particular sound frequency he plays on his pipes.
Is a very specific higher register that,
the sonic frequency kills the mites
that carry the black plague, the ill ones.
The sound itself, it's kind of like laser surgery.
You know... sonic surgery.
Just the playing of the notes causes those rats
to become immune to the plague.
And therefore ...
playing with these particular rats
does not cause the children to die either.
And everything goes along rather nicely
for quite some time.
Then slowly ....
the children grow older
(as children do.)
And the rats continue to breed
(which is what rats do.)
And they breed a stronger strain of rats.
Basically: the sonic frequencies played
on Peate's busted penny whistle pipe
cause those in close proximity to its playing
to be immune to the black plague.
. Well .
the RATS end up propagating rather nicely.
. But .
the KIDS grow up to become tween angsters.
And at that point ...
the next conspiracy of rights of passage is in play...
nextit: RATTING ON YUNGER BRATPACKS:
as a tween: your job is:
you turn in your younger brothers and sisters.
when ever under your agers try to do any crazy shit,
you turn them in, to "the adults"
and hense, build up trust points :
to be "allowed" to stay out later,
and not get caught yourself:
(after all.. the adults are too busy
(trying to catch as catch can...
(and youngerlings are good distraction...)
any of the younger brothers and sisters
of the original crowd that came through.
Told their parents
"oh yeah, we used to go over to that guys house.
that guy's a fucking crazy guy.
You shouldn't let them go anywhere near him."
So...over time....(by no means all of a sudden )
there's less and less children showing up
and more and more rats showing up.
The rats have become semi-sentient
from listening to the music.
Music quite often does...
there have been studies lately
that prove that people who play an instrument
end up with higher IQs.
Because of the amount of connectivity
needed to play a musical instrument.
It causes certain sections of the brain to grow faster.
their appreciation of the music,
their appreciation of the pumpkin pies
cause these rats to become a little more intelligent.
by hanging out with the children
the rats pick up some of the childlike mannerisms.
the children taught them little games
and little tricks :
how to stand on their back legs
and to get fed a little piece of pumpkin pie.
As the children start being less and less.
And the rats become more and more.
Peter Pied starts cutting back on making the pies.
he's a little depressed.
and the rats start thinking to themselves
now that they have sloWEly built a social structure
and come up one the intelligence level a little bit.
And they start building a community.
They decide that may be the children
are in direct competition with the rats
for the pipers affections and interest.
And the more children there are
the less pie there is for the rats.
now that there are so many rats
that some of the rats would not get fed,
if more children showed up.
the ratpack starts a conspiracy.
KNOCKING OFF THE comPETit10NS
Date: Wed, 17 Jun 1998 02:41:25 -0700
From: see_D_pr0phF1TS <firstname.lastname@example.org>
Subject:#p0pD: aka Peat DilemMa
ramifs and whats left..
the ratpack starts a consperacy.
KNOCKING OFF THE COMPETTITION:
Whenever any small children ...
Those most couragious,
the most ballsy of the smallest. . .
who would go for no other reason
than to do it for their own reward
of their own accord
to try/push their OWN luck..
the four year olds,
the five year olds,
would show up alone.
The rats would.. in a pack..
attack the child
and eat them.
this, of course..
caused the reputation of Peate's PepDen
to become even worse. (and oddly, better)
The intelegence and the courage
of those children gets psychically passed
on to the rats who eat the child.
the rats become ever more couragious
and they start to eat the children.
At that point......
Peater Pieyed kind of shrugs his shoulders..
and packs up his pipe
and gives up ever making pies again.
He wanders off to the land of Hamlen.
And that is where the story
you may have heard heard before picks up.
After the story of Hamlen...
Where a Pied piper... knowing full well
that there are a lot of rats that follow him
if he plays his pipe.
and even tho they don't get paid,
The lost rats follow him anyway,
hopig to get fed...
So he's going to bring the death...
the plague with him, wherever he goes.
(Actually.. he just brings a lot of rats with him.)
But how are the people there suposed to know,
that their all tamed rats.
And he gets a gig in hamlin:
and doesn't get paid...
and a bunch of children ....
And so it went:
he goes into this mountian.
He goes off to Shangrala with the children.
And the rats all drown.
because he figures out how
to get rid of the rats.
At this new place...
THE ROAD to/thru the passed mount:
Subject:#p0pE: aka Peat's EYEma mODE
Peatea finds a girl
he falls in love with her.
She is a very good baby sitter.
and Peate doesn't REALLY know
how to deal with kids.
He has no idea.
he just thought they were kind of fun to play with.
He liked making pies,
and since the rats have left the building,
he starts makeing pies again.
And this buttery woman
is SUCH a good nursery school teacher.
She knows how to keep the kids calm
and he learns better how to play his pipe.
(^in facet.. he learns SO WELL how to play..
(^that his musings on the pipe causes plant growth..
He becomes a minsteral in a (k)NEW court.
And this woman moves into... the...whole of a pumpkin.
then he becomes the Petete peate moss pumkin shell maker.
( days latter on is his stoRYE(s)(?)