I go to U of I for Halloween, 2001. On the night after Halloween, Nov 1 for you morons who don't know what comes after Oct31, we go to my friends local hangout, Gully's. All my friends are there, we're boozing, taking shots, getting hammered because we have to stay up all night so I make my 6am flight back to Arizona State.

So, as I go to order a drink at the bar, I start talking to this girl standing next to me. I start talking, spittin a little game, and I can tell that she is into me. We have a few drinks, chat a bit. She, like me, is at U of I from another school. Unfortunately though, she couldn't find her friends, which really was too bad. My friends see me talking to this girl, and, for once, leave me alone. Jason walked over, I introduced him to Ashton (this is the point where I found out her name), and he gives me a handshake, with the key to his place in his hand. It was like a bad 80's movie.

I convince her that we should probably get out of the bar and go back to my friend's place. Another brilliant scheme hatched up from my incredibly intelligent mind. We get in her car, she's wasted, and driving, and I remember that I don't actually live here and am not sure how to get home, again (see: New Year's 2001) After driving around for about 15 minutes (the house is literally one turn and one block away) we arrive at my friend's place. We go up the stairs to the apartment. I locate the correct apartment, hoping that they didn't beat me home and are already doing the after-bar partying. Luckily, nobody is home.

We enter the apartment. I give her the quick tour, focusing on the bed that I will be using to hook up wth her that night. About five minutes in, it starts. We start slowly, and after about five minutes I can tell it will be a great night. Just then, the apartment door bursts open with all of my friends coming in together, being loud and obnoxious. It is almost as if they could smell that there was a female in heat and had to get in and break it up to ensure that I would not get any. As soon as they entered I knew it was trouble. Now it was just a question of how long it would take her to leave.

Now that my friends are all there, we continue to drink. It's about 2am now, my flight is at 7am, I have to be at the airport by 6am. My friend's roomate, Reggie asks Ashton if she smokes. At this point I already know what is going to happen. I can see the events three and four minutes ahead. She explains that she has smoked two of three times, ever. I can see the develish look in his eyes building. He then asks if she would like to partake this evening. She says yes, sure she'll smoke. At this point he starts to explain that he will pull the hit, and all she has to do is suck it in really really hard. Make sure that there is no smoke left. He does, she does. As she is inhaling, my friends are all cheering and being obnoxious because we all know what is going to happen next.

Sure enough, she goes into a hysterical cough. She must have coughed or five whole minutes, straight, no breaks. After that, it was over. She stayed out and attempted to hang out for a bit. After about ten minutes of that she goes into my friends bed and passes out. Now we have some random girl passed out in my friend's bed, me unhappy because now there is no chance of me getting any ass tonight, and now my friend who I came to visit has no place to sleep. Well, I decide to get even.

As 5am rolls around we realize that she has locked the door to the room that she was sleeping in. Jason tries to use the door from the balcony, but it is locked as well. He is now panicking. I tell him that I will just open the door with a credit card. For some reason, that sent him into a hysterical fit of laughter and prompted him to bet me $20 that I couldn't do it. I gladly accepted this wager, and succeeded on my first attempt. He was floored, literally. Now we're in the room.

I attempt to tap her on the shoulder to waker her up, but there is no budge. I look around and spot that her shoes are off and in the corner of the room. I decide to take one and put it in the bottom of my duffle bag, unbenounced to her. Finally, sfter several attempts, she finally wakes. She is hastily putting on her clothes and making an attempt to leave before we just kick her out to go to the airport. Here is the dialogue:

 

 

 

 

Her shoe got nailed to my wall back at ASU. I spoke with her after that, and she asked again about the shoe. The funny thing is we watched her walk to her car, with one shoe. She had one shoe! Ha-Ha-Ha!!!