Hype for tonight's big match. Only Shawn Michaels has pre-recorded
comments, no doubt because the 1-2-3 Kid's would have been too goofy.
Your hosts are Vince McMahon and Bobby 'the Brain' Heenan, who provide all
commentary. They discuss the big match and Vince mentions that Gorilla
Monsoon made a phone call before the show.
Shawn Michaels v. the "1-2-3" Kid in a non-title match - Lockup, to the
buckle. They trade punches. The Kid with a shoulderblock. Dueling
countermoves. The Kid with matrial arts kicks and out goes the Champ. The
Kid swandives from the top to the floor. Kid suplexes Shawn, belly to back,
back into the ring and gets a 2 count. Kid with weardown hold, Michaels
with hairpulling. Michaels goes all over the ring, but the Kid hangs on to
the hold. Finally, Michaels figures if the Kid is going to hold on, he
might as well suplex him and does. The hold is released. Michaels takes
control culminating in a flying headscissors which causes the Kid to fly
through the ropes and to the floor. Michaels goes out after him and
attempts to whip him into the STEEL ringpost, but the Kid reverses and
Michaels hits it instead. The Kid poises himself on the apron for another
aerial attack to the floor, but Michaels catches him and turns it into a
powerslam on the mat. We take an ad brea, no doubt as Michaels does
something aerial, landing on the Kid. When we come back, the Champ has
control. 2 count for Shawn. Whip into the ropes. Michaels sits the Kid up
and attempts a superplex, but the Kid punches away until Michaels falls to
the canvas. The Kid attempts a dropkick from the top, but Shawn
simultaneously attempts a dropkick, and the Kid gets the worst of it. 2
count by Michaels. Michaels with another submission hold. Arm falls twice,
Kid kicks Michaels in the head. Kid with kick and they're both down. Kid
lays an arm across Michaels for 2. They both get up and after a
clothesline, they're both down again. Rederee "Blind" Danny Davis counts,
but they both manage to get up again. They trade blows, then the Kid gives
some uncontested shots and delivers a moonsault. 2 count. Bodyslam by the
Kid. The Kid tries another somersault but lands on his back as Michaels
moves out of the way. Luckily, we take another ad break while there's no
decision. When we come back, Michaels is again in control of things. He
gives the "I'm going to give the Razor's Edge signal," and then actually
delivers a Razor's Edge to the 1-2-3 Kid. 1, 2, Michaels pulls up the Kid's
head. He gives the Kid ANOTHER Razor's Edge. Before he can give him a
third, out comes rRazor rRamon. He grabs the Kid and pulls him to the
outside. Michaels has some words with the real IC champ and then slaps him.
The chase is on, around the ring, to the curtain. Michaels trips and falls.
Ramon is ready to give out a major beating, but from behind the curtain,
Diesel clocks Ramon with that infamous right hand. Michaels destroys Ramon
and gives HIM two Razor's Edge(s?), and on the cement!!! (These look really
lame, by the way.) No decision is announced, but it should have been
Michaels by DQ.
Les Quebecois v. Bert Centeno & Mike Walsh - Johnny Polo brings a patio
chair and literature to read during this match, which should tell you how
exciting it's going to be. Jacques makes fun of Centeno's relatively
diminutive stature, so the Puerto Rican decks him and gives him a dropkick.
Then he tags out. Smart boy. Of course, Walsh flounders and the Quebecers
get their revenge after the next tag. After the pin, they place Centeno in
the chair and then clothesline him.
First Rumble Royale ad...definitely not the last. Isn't it strange that
they show you footage from the IC battle royal instead of from a Royal
Rumble? Hey, there's the MVP! Anyway...
Locker room interview with the Rocket Owen Hart. He's got a big surprise
coming up...something that will make everyone talk about him and not Bret.
Doink v. Tony DeVito - Joy of joys, Dink is brought out in a baby stroller.
Promos: "New" WWF Figures, Electronic Talking Battleship ("Yeah!"), Street
Fighter 2: Special Championship Edition Sega cart
This match goes on forever. Dink mugs while Doink...er...wrestles.
Double J with a different fat guy. They meet up with some other guy. I get
Macho Man v. Fatu is the hyped match for next week.
Crush v. Tony Roy - Goody goody, Savage is on the phone from Bournemouth,
England! That means THIS match will take forever. Savage cuts in and out,
but it doesn't matter because he's babbling anyway. Pin...no head crush?
The WWF: Unbelievable! One of the Hugo brothers gets worked over by some
WWF superstars. "Was it something I said?"
Promos: GI Joe, Electronic Hot Shot Basketball, King of the Ring Nintendo
Next week: Special Undertaker interview (hint, hint, we find out the RR
main event soon), Adam Bomb in action, Smoking Scotsmen in action, Fatu vs.
Out comes Gorilla Monsoon. Gee, they've only been mentioning him ALL NIGHT.
The good news is that Bobby Heenan has won a trip, the bad news is that it's
a trip out of the building. Monsoon drags Heenan out, tosses his belongings
out to him. Heenan manages a lot of bumbling and stumbling before picking
up his duffel bag. In tears, he makes a farewell salute and takes off as we
fade out. Guys, I don't think we're seeing him again.
*sigh* I hate it when I'm right.
Christopher Robin Zimmernan, that RAW guy