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Babes on Broadway
Music: various
Lyrics: various
Premiere: 1941
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How About You?

PENNY:
When a girl meets boy,
life can be a joy,
but the note they end on
will depend on little pleasures they will share;
so let us compare.

I like New York in June,
how about you?
I like a Gershwin tune,
how about you?
I love a fireside
when a storm is due.
I like potato chips,
moonlight and motor trips,
how about you?

I'm mad about good books,
can't get my fill,
and Franklin Roos'velt's looks
give me a thrill.

Holding hands at the movie show,
when all the lights are low
may not be new,
but I like it,
how about you?

I like Jack Benny's jokes.
TOMMY: To a degree.
PENNY: I love the common folks.
TOMMY: that includes me
PENNY: I like to window shop on 5th Avenue.
TOMMY: I like banana splits, late supper at the Ritz, how about you?
PENNY: I love to dream of fame, maybe I'll shine.
TOMMY: I'd love to see your name right beside mine.
PENNY: I can see we're in harmony
TOMMY: Looks like we both agree on what to do
BOTH: And I like it, how about you?
TOMMY:
I'm so delighted I've ignited the spark within you.
Let me continue to make it burn.
PENNY:
With you I will be like a Trilby,
so let's not dally.
Come on Svengali, I've lots to learn.
TOMMY: When you're arisin', start exercisin' daily.
PENNY: For example, just a sample?
TOMMY: Bend and touch the floor fifty times or more.
PENNY: Ha! A fine start to be a Bernhardt!
TOMMY:
A dictionary's necessary but not for talking,
it's used for walking the Ziegfeld way.
PENNY: Is this OK?
TOMMY: That's the trick, you're catching on quickly.
PENNY: Should I take a bow?
TOMMY: A-ho! Let me show you how!
PENNY: Just like partners on the stage.
TOMMY: If you can use a partner, I'm the right age.


Hoedown

PENNY:
When our grandmas and our grandpas were just girls and boys,
they seemed to have a lot more fun than we.
Their party clothes were calicoes and homemade corduroys,
and a big event was called a husking bee.
A banjo, and a fiddle, and a big old fashion barn was all the prepartion that they made and
if they tell you otherwise, dismiss it as a yarn, refreshments were confined to lemonade.
Now you may say it's corny, and I guess I must agree, but it was good enough for grandma,
it was good enough for grandpa, and it's good enough for me.
Hoedown, the country's gone hoedown. It's puttin' its toe down,
and kickin' its heel.
Hoedown is really a rare dance, a pioneer square dance but with a new deal.
One, two, swing your partner lightly while you hold her ever so tightly.
Hoedown, and bring your best beau down, we're facin' a showdown and gotta make hay,
'cause hoedowns on its way. Stand in line and do the turkey like a Yankee Doodle Dandy.

TOMMY: When you turkey, do it jerky, that's the trick. Now you're hoein' on down.
CHORUS: Sashay, sashay, sashay around while you're hoein' on down.
PENNY: Form a circle in the middle, everybody allemande.
TOMMY: Boys keep tempo with the fiddle, and your gal in the calico gown.
CHORUS: Ho ho, ho ho, ho hoe on down with your calico gown.
PENNY: do-si-do around, it's very romantic.
CHOURS: Do-si-do
TOMMY: Do-si-do some more and maybe she'll fall
CHORUS: Do do do do hi-ho
BOTH (Penny and Tommy):
Now it's time to do your honors,
then when you've gone through your honors promenade the hall.
CHORUS: Da da da da da da
BOTH:
Hoedown, the countrys gone hoedown.
Its puttin' its toe down, and kickin' its heel.
Hoedown is really a rare dance, a pioneer square dance but with a new deal.
One, two, swing your partner lightly while you hold her ever so tightly.
Ho-ho-hoedown, and bring your best beau down, we're facin' a showdown and gotta make hay.
CHORUS: Hoedown today
BOTH: 'cause hoedowns on its way....
CHORUS: Hoedown and bring you best beau down, we're facin' a showdown we gotta make hay....
ALL:
So hoedown, showdown, the hoe downs on it's way!!


Chin Up! Cheerio! Carry On!
PENNY:
From the dark cafes of Paris, from the streets of Amsterdam,
from the homes of old Vienna to the shores of Uncle Sam,
wherever freedom's hope is true each heart cries out to you.
Don't give up, Tommy Atkins, be a stout fella,
Chin up! Cheerio! Carry on!
Keep a stiff upper lip when you're in
doubt, fella, Chin up! Cheerio! Carry on!
Oh, the sun's sure to smile on your tight little isle,
so hang on to your wits and you'll turn the blitz on Fritz,
there's a whole world behind you shoutin' "stout fella!"
Chin up! Cheerio! Carry on!

BOYS:
Don't give up, Tommy Atkins, be a stout fella,
Chin up! Cheerio! Carry on!
Keep a stiff upper lip when you're in doubt, fella,
Chin up! Cheerio! Carry on!
Oh, the sun's sure to smile on your tight little isle,
so hang on to your wits and you'll turn the blitz on Fritz,
there's a whole world behind you shoutin'
"stout fella!" Chin up! Cheerio! Carry on!

ALL:
Don't give up, Tommy Atkins, be a stout fella,
Chin up! Cheerio! Carry on!
Keep a stiff upper lip when you're in doubt, fella,
Chin up! Cheerio! Carry on!
Oh, the sun's sure to smile on your tight little isle,
so hang on to your wits and you'll turn the blitz on Fritz,
there's a whole world behind you shoutin' "stout fella!"
Chin up! Cheerio! Carry on!...Carry on!!!


Mary's a Grand Old Name


PENNY:
For it is Mary, Mary plain as any name can be,
but with propriety, society will say "Marie".
But it was Mary, Mary long before the fashions came
and there is something there that sounds so square,
it's a grand old name.

CHOURS:
But it was Mary, Mary long before the fashions
came (Penny joins in) and there is something
there that sounds so square, it's a grand old name.


Rings on My Fingers and Bells on My Toes

PENNY:
Sure, I've got my rings on my fingers and bells on my toes,
Elephants to ride upon, my little Irish Rose.
So come to your nabob on next Patricks Day,
Be Mistress Mumbo-Jumbo Jij-Ji-Bo J. O'shea.
(chorus joins)
Sure, I've got my rings on my fingers and bells on my toes,
Elephants to ride upon, my little Irish Rose.
So come to your nabob on next Patricks Day,
Be Mistress Mumbo-Jumbo Jij-Ji-Bo J. O'shea.


Yankee Doodle Boy

TOMMY:
I'm a Yankee Doodle Dandy,
Yankee Doodle do or die.
A real live nephew of my unlce Sam,
I was born on the 4th of July.
I've got a yankee doodle sweetheart,
she's my Yankee Doodle joy.
Yankee doodle came to London,
just to ride the ponies.
Say, I am a Yankee Doodle Boy.

PENNY:
He's a Yankee Doodle Dandy,
a yankee doodle do or die.
A real live nephew of his uncle Sam,
born on the 4th of July.

TOMMY & CHORUS:
I've got a yankee doodle sweetheart,
she's my yankee doodle joy.

TOMMY & PENNY:
Yankee doodle came to London,
just to ride the ponies. I am a Yankee Doodle boy.


Bombshell Over Brazil


ANNE(her character didn't have a name!): Run for your lives!
HAMMY: Stay where you are!
BARBARA JO: Make alot of noise!
RAY: Keep still!
PENNY: A bombshell just fell over Brazil.
HAMMY & RAY: Lay down your arms
ANNE & BARBARA JO: Run up your flags
4 GUYS: You'll surrender to this jill
PENNY:
This bombshell that fell over Brazil.
Her contribution to the art of elocution
is apt to start a revolution
among the ladies at the Ritz.
In Rio de Janeiro, when she sings "Mamãe, eu quero"
every local caballero admits that it's a blitz.

ALL:
So, give up the ship, throw in the sponge,
get ready for a great big thrill,
for here comes that bombshell from Brazil.

TOMMY:
Mamãe eu quero
Mamãe eu quero
Mamãe eu quero mamar
Dá a chupeta
Dá a chupeta
Dá a chupeta pro bebê não chorar
Mamamamamam eu quero
Mamãe eu quero
Mamãe eu quero mamar
Dá a chupeta
Dá a chupeta
Dá a chupeta pro bebê não chorar
Hey, Ma!

Blackout Over Broadway

ALL 6:
Here we are, six characters, depressed and melancholy.
Here we are, six characters, in search of a finale.
We've racked our brains and taxed our minds
to find a trick that's new,
but still we haven't got the slightest idea what to do.

BARBARA JO:
[spoken] We might try a Russian ballet,
but a ballet might disclose that I am more
athletic than aesthetic on my toes.

HAMMY:
[spoken] Say, how about a circus? We could all go acrobatic.
Now, here's a trick I learned in school, to strenghten my...sciatic.

ANNE:
We could all go South American,
and cut a South American rug.
Ah, but I'd never arrive,
I ain't hep to their jive![
I'm just a Brooklyn jitterbug.

RAY:
[spoken] Hold everything- I've got it, pals!
Let's do an aquacade.
It's true that I can't swim a stroke, ah, but you oughta see me wade!

PENNY: What's wrong with doing something old? Something tried and true
TOMMY: Well, how about a minstrel show (PENNY joins) does that appeal to you?
PENNY: A good old-fashioned minstrel show
4 OTHERS: {spoken] That suits us
TOMMY: [spoken] Well, then let's go!

ALL 6:
Go and tell New York to grab a piece of cork
and join that blackout over Broadway.
Everybody's gonne be dancin' on air

BARBARA JO & RAY: When they hear 'em playin' "Swanee River" in Times Square
ANNE & HAMMY:
Every southern lass is gonna cook with gas,
and boy, that southern cookin's ok!

PENNY & TOMMY:
And when you hear that moan on the slide trombone,
you'll wanna black up (others join) for that blackout over Braodway.

PENNY & TOMMY:
Go and tell the town they oughta come on down
and join that blackout over Broadway

BARBARA JO & RAY: You'll see Andrew Jackson Brown, straight from the south
BARBARA JO: and if he don't entertain you, you can shut my mouth!
ANNE & HAMMY:
There'll be so much fun
that long before we're done those angels up in Heaven will say

PENNY & TOMMY:
Ain't got no time to stall, spread your wings,
you all, and start to black up for that blackout over Broadway.

CHORUS:
Every southern lass is gonna cook with gas,
and boy, that southern cookin's ok!
And when you hear that moan on the slide trombone,
you'll wanna black up for that blackout over Broadway!

Minstrel Show

HAMMY:
[spoken] Gentlemen, be seated.
[singing] Mr. Tambo, Mr. Tambo, how do you do?
And incidentally, how do you feel?

MR. TAMBO (PENNY):
[spoken] Well, now, I-I-I feels just like a stovepipe, n-nothing else b-buddy

HAMMY: [spoken] You feels just like a stovepipe?

MR. TAMBO (PENNY):
[spoken] A-yeah, sooty! Hee hee hee hee, hyah hyah hyah hyah
(CHORUS scats)

HAMMY:
Now, Mr. Bones, Mr. Bones, it's good to see you,
and incidentally, Mr. Bones, how do you feel?

MR. BONES (TOMMY):
[spoken] How does I feel? Well, man, I feels just like a fireplace here of late
HAMMY: [spoken] You say you feels just like a fireplace?
MR. BONES (TOMMY): [spoken] I said it, I feels "grate" *laughter* (CHORUS scats)

HAMMY:
We all expect some dancing when the minstrels come to town,
snow may I present to you,
Mr. Rufus Rastus Jefferson Davis Brown.

CHORUS sings:
"By The Light of the Silvery Moon"

RAY:(dances)

Franklin D. Roosevelt Jones

MEN: Oh, Oh, Mr. could there be something wrong?
WOMEN: We are waiting just to hear Mr. Tambo do his song.
HAMMY: Mr. Tambo, do you feel good and strong?
CHORUS: Then get right up and the folks how you can sing that song.
MR. TAMBO (PENNY): I hear tell there's a stranger in the Jones household
CHORUS: Ye, sirree, yes, sirree
PENNY: That's what I'm told, I hear tell there's a new arrival six day's old
CHORUS: Yes, sirree, yes, sirree
PENNY:
Worth his wait in gold.
Come right in and meet the son,
christening's done,
time to have some fun

CHORUS: Yes, sirree, yes, sirree
PENNY: Yes, sirree
CHORUS: Yes, sirree, yes, sirree

PENNY:
It's a big holiday everywhere, for the Jones family has a brand-new heir,
he's a joy, heaven-sent, and we proudly present Mr. Franklin D. Roosevelt Jones.
When he grows up, he never will stray with a name like the one that he's got today.
When he walks down the street, folks will say,
"Pleased to meet, Mr. Franklin D. Roosevelt Jones.
" What a smile, and how he shows it.
He'll be happy all day long, what a name, I'll bet he knows it.
With that handle, how can he go wrong?
And the folks in the town all agree, he'll be famous, as famous as he can be.
How can he be a dud or a stick-in-the-mud, when he's Franklin D. Roosevelt Jones?
Go to sleep, my baby and maybe you'll balance the budget by and by.
Oh, you're a lucky baby with Franklin D. for your name.
Mrs. Jones' baby boy is a welcome president,
give him a fishing rod for a toy, he's the future president!
When this rascal goes to school ABC's won't matter,
teach him plain old 'rithmetic, and of course some fireside chatter.
My friends, my friends, let's all shout hooray!

CHORUS:
It's a big holiday everywhere for the Jones family has a brand-new heir

PENNY:
We'll be proud to affirm when he serves his fourth term, just you wait and see

CHORUS: Yeah!
PENNY: He'll make history
CHORUS: Yeah!
ALL: 'cause he's Franklin D. Roosevelt Jones!

CHORUS:
Oh, ring, ring the banjo for Franklin Roosevelt Jones,
but when you hear the banjo, it's played by Mr. Bones

MR. BONES (plays "Swanee River" on the banjo)


Waiting for the Robert E. Lee


BARBARA JO:
Way down on the levee in old Alabamy,
there's Daddy and Mammy, there's Ephraim and Sammy.
On a moonlight night you can find them all.
While they are waitin', the banjos are syncopatin'

ANNE:
Oh, what's that they're sayin'?
Oh, what's that they're sayin'?
While they keep playin', and hummin' and swayin',
it's the good ship Robert E. Lee that's here to carry the cotton away.

PENNY:
Ah-ha-ha, watch them shufflin' along, see them shufflin' along!
Go take your best gal, your real pal, go down on the levee,
I said to the levee, and we'll (CHORUS joins) join that shufflin' throng.
Hear that music and song.
It's simply great, mate,
waitin' on the levee,
waitin' for the Robert E. Lee!

DANCE SCENE

Babes on Broadway

PENNY, TOMMY, BARBARA JO, HAMMY, RAY, & ANNE:
We're babes on Broadway,
we're goin' places, when our new faces appear.
It's wonderful street for babes like us to be on,
we're here because we want to see our names in neon.
We left Topeka, we left Eureka and came to seek a career.
Oh, we're milkin' applause instead of milkin' a cow,
'cause we're babes on Broadway now!

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