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This is not your mother's wedding registry


Today's couples can go from practical to outrageous when choosing items for their kitchens

By HOLLY AUER
News Staff Reporter
3/24/2004

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SHARON CANTILLON/Buffalo News
Some couples who already have the basics may opt for something a little more elaborate like the Cuisinart food processor.

SHARON CANTILLON/Buffalo News
Mary and Sean Bobek grab a bounty of items not found on a traditional wedding registry. Above left, a good set of knives like this set from Wusthof and an All-Clad saute pan are also topping couple's lists.

Gone are the days when a young bride would walk into a department store with her mother to nervously pick out a start-to-finish wedding registry of kitchen gadgetry and appliances.

Today's brides and grooms are a little older, and a little more settled into adult life. They don't need measuring cups or a coffee maker - most have had that stuff for years.

Still, setting up a wedding registry remains one of the most exciting parts of planning a wedding. Already armed with all the basic kitchen stuff, couples today are on the hunt for upgrades and extras - the huge 14-cup food processor, the heart-shaped waffle maker, and the fancy fondue pot.

They envision a culinary life together that transcends mere sustenance.

They'll host fabulous cocktail parties, complete with monogrammed cocktail shakers and beautiful marble cheese boards. Their dinner parties will feature individual mini cheesecakes and designer martinis, not Jell-O molds and decaf Maxwell House.

And in that fantasy world, Sunbeam and Tupperware just won't cut it.

But as easy as it is to get lost among aisles of ice cream makers and espresso machines, registry consultants advise couples to be realistic and look at the big picture.

Roughly translated: Don't go overboard.

"Think about yourself as a couple, think about your extended family, and about how much you plan to entertain," said Kerry McKinnon, a sales associate at Williams-Sonoma in the Walden Galleria. "That will determine the kinds of things you need to register for."

That means if you're not a total klutz in the kitchen and both of you have families in the area, you're eventually going to be called upon to host a big holiday dinner for the whole crew.

So unless you're not ashamed to have a few people eat off your chipped, unmatched plates from college, be sure to register for enough place settings - flatware, dinner plates, salad bowls, soup bowls, dessert plates, cups and saucers - to accommodate everyone who might show up.

It may seem boring to register for something as common as plates, but they'll surely come in handy - probably a lot more handy than that rice cooker you're dying to fire up.

And, McKinnon cautions, don't forget the small stuff.
Growing up, all you had to do was open the nearest drawer to find the melon baller, can opener, or whatever it was you needed.

But even if you've been on your own for a few years by the time you get married, chances are you're still making due with a fairly small arsenal of specialty tools. So go ahead and register for a few different sized ice cream scoopers, a turkey baster and, say, some of those little skewers you stick in the ends of corn on the cob.

Be realistic

You've got to make sure you don't lose your head in this sea of gourmet accoutrements, though. After you've eaten your weight in jordan almonds at your bridal showers, you're probably going to be hauling your registry booty back to your teeny-tiny apartment kitchen.

Space constraints were a big priority for Courtney Ellis and Chris Post, who plan to marry in August, when they put together their registry at Williams-Sonoma recently.

They live together in a Buffalo apartment that's super-short on kitchen space, but it hasn't stopped them from craving a sizable kitchenware collection.

Their plan? Registry moderation.

"I think we would rather register for a few nice things and have room to use them than get a bunch of things we don't have any space for," Ellis said.

She quickly found, though, that even picking out small things required making tough choices. Ellis first gravitated to a marble rolling pin, but when she learned it's meant to be used along with a big marble board, she set her sights on a traditional wooden pin, instead.

"I'd love to have that marble board for baking, but we don't have anyplace to put it," she said.

Mentally shelving her picks, she also chose a half-sheet pan, which is more versatile than rimless cookie sheets, and rejected a popover tin, since it can only be used to make one thing.

Grooms have their say

One of the biggest changes in the registry world is the increasing role played by grooms. They don't just sit down at the table to eat those luscious dinners - chances are, they've helped make them, from boiling the water to topping the food with fresh ground pepper.

A survey conducted last month by the Knot, a bustling online community for brides-to-be, found that men are taking care of the cooking just as much - if not more - as their fiancees and wives.

Most couples reported that they take turns with kitchen duty, and many said that cooking together is a favorite activity.

Usually, brides said, whoever doesn't cook will happily take on cleanup duties, or tackle other household jobs like laundry.

When Jim Manning and Susan Giacchino, who will be married this summer, went to register at Bed, Bath, and Beyond recently, he was running the show.

"I'm doing all the kitchen stuff - picking out the knives, looking at the Cuisinarts and Calphalon stuff," said the 32-year-old Manning, a sales rep. "She's not too interested in this stuff. The bedroom stuff and decorations are more her thing."

To get china or not

Like many couples today, Manning and Giacchino, who live in Silver Creek, are unsure if they'll register for china.

They can picture themselves using appliances and electric gadgets with funky bells and whistles, but aren't quite sure if they'll need a tabletop spread fit for a state dinner.

And, as every 21st century cook knows, there's one thing about china that just doesn't mesh with the modern lifestyle - you can't put it in the dishwasher.

But the temptation to go ahead and put it all on the list is pretty intense, said Giacchino, a 25-year-old social worker.

"This is the only time in my life people will help me buy such expensive things, so I feel like I should take advantage of that," she said. "I'm never going to have this chance again."

Still, the very best china may seem like mere child's play to the truly gourmet couple.


The 21st century bridal industry even has an answer to their upscale prayers.

The Knot now features a "Create a Gift Registry" where guests can purchase American Express Gift Cheques toward a big-ticket item of the couple's choosing.

For example, maybe it's a professional Viking stove you're dreaming of - at a whopping $5,000. Or perhaps you want a series of just-for-couples cooking classes, or a fancy tile floor for your kitchen.

These days, if you can imagine it, you can register for it.


e-mail: hauer@buffnews.com




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