Twin Teepees
7201 Aurora Ave N

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Who doesn’t want to get roaring drunk inside this round and tasty bit of Americana? One teepee houses the bar, kitchen, and restrooms, the other is the Entirely Round And Fabulous Restaurant. The bar itself is tiny, staffed by one wonderful bartender named Christine--also known as She Who Delivers Lemon Drops From the Deities. She also warned us that they were gonna be shutting the salad bar down early, so if WE WANTED SALAD WITH OUR DRINKS, we should hurry and get up there. Does anyone ever want a salad when they’re drinking? "Bring on the Fried!" we said, and they did--warm, fast, and tasty. It’s always quiet--there’s a few ancient-mariner type regulars--if you actually feel like talking to the folks you’re out drinking with, this is a great place to do it. Cell phones are a way of life here--I wondered whether some agency was supplying them to the homeless/crazy folks so it wouldn’t look like they were just talking to themselves. If the restaurant side is empty, sit there--fireplace, scary totems hanging from the ceiling, and did I mention It’s Entirely Round? Don’t fool yourself, swing kids--this is the 50s you think you’re so nostalgic for. Dark, overbearing, appropriating the hell out of every Native American item they can think of, frozen eclairs, and lots of heavy drinking. Like my old man said when he was trying not to cuss in front of us kids, "God Bless America." And did I mention that It’s Entirely Round?

Reviewed by
Jill Lightner

Booze: Full Bar

Food: Full menu all hours

Music: Live music? No

Smoking: Yes

Packed? Not packed. Probably has never been packed.

Meat Market? NOT a meat market, unless you mean the dinner special

Gay? For guys, not recommended.  For women, go for it if you don’t mind being perceived as providing some "hot lesbo action."

Age? Salty drunks of all ages, talking to their cell phones.

Beer Price: $2.25-$3.75

How stiff are the drinks? Fair-to-middlin', drink em straight with chasers if you want to be sure

Whats the conversation youll most likely overhear? "Goldammit, mumblemumble, I’ll come on home after I finish this last one mumblemumble baby"--said into cell phone by very old man.

What's the dress code? No shoes, no shirt, no service. Teepees are fickle when it comes to maintaining temperature--I recommend layers.

What does it take to get thrown out? Throwing up on the floor, pinching butts that aren’t yours to pinch.