What She Cannot Have
Disclaimer: Paramount owns STAR TREK ... etc and so on and so forth!
My only pay here is personal joy
Summary: Another chapter to the Bonded Souls series. This one is set
after "Return To Us" and before "Gathering Together".
Inspired by Janet's challenge - Write an S/Mc where an either Spock
or McCoy meet up
with an old flame.
Archiving: Cool- if you want to- please let me know.
Feedback: Yes please! All comments are welcome
Author's Note: This is my own take on a possible future for a certain
season two guest star. My endless thanks Janet for her marvelous BETA
and for believing in my work enough to want to make it better.
NOTE - In this particular universe, Spock's trip to Gol would not
have actually taken place. This, of course, has little bearing on
this particular chapter <g> but I thought it was worth throwing
it in just to clear up any misunderstandings.
What She Cannot Have
walked the quiet corridors of the Federation station K-7, her mind
methodically dissecting and contemplating the importance of what
had occurred earlier in the station's day. She had attended this
conference out of professional and, to a lesser degree, personal
interest in the field of Xenobiology. She had also attended out
of deference to the memory of Stonn.
in his own reserved way, had adored the science of Xenobiology.
It had fascinated him. He would have wanted her to come.
trod the spacious and well lit corridors quietly, her step light,
her movements graceful. She was beautiful, entering into the height
of her maturity. She had all the slender elegance of a jade vase
and an equal measure of a comparable item's warmth.
was aloof, like most Vulcans, outwardly controlled and magnificently
distant. But as she moved through the nighttime corridors, she was
beset by a constant and powerful surge of internal conflict.
was *most* illogical.
reached the empty conference center and stood for a moment in the
silent darkness of the auditorium.
was here that she had seen him. Just one of a number of guests attending
the opening speeches.
son of Sarek, was here.
drew in a deep breath and faced her own honesty.
had made a mistake.
through the years of her life, in a ceremony that was so long ago
it almost seemed like a dream, she had turned her face away from
her chosen bondmate. She had selected another, declaring Spock unworthy
by reason of his tendency to illogical acts of heroism.
had made a mistake.
the time, she had not thought so. She had believed her logic to
be impeccable. But age and experience had granted her wisdom.
could not regret her bond with Stonn. His love for her had been
deep and intense. They had fit well together both as mates and as
colleagues. When he had lost his life in a shuttle accident, her
grief had been sincere and devastating.
as she had grown older, she had begun to dream of breaking new ground,
of pioneering, of shining at the forefront of her field. She had
wanted her name synonymous with that of her home world.
was not to be. She and Stonn had lived a moderately successful life.
Their achievements, while respectable, were hardly universe shaking.
Her name became well known throughout the scientific community on
off the planet, only Vulcans knew who she was.
so Captain Spock. Scientist, adventurer... hero. *His* name was
spoken with respect and reverence, particularly since his death
and re-birth. *His* name was known and spoken from Earth through
to the furthest reaches of the Klingon Empire.
had not been privileged to witness the ritual of fal-tor-pan that
had resurrected the living legend. She regretted that too. Perhaps
had she been there following his awakening, she might have found
the opportunity she now coveted.
retrospect she was forced to concede... she had chosen the wrong
mate. Such thoughts were allowable now that Stonn was dead. Such
thoughts could not hurt him now.
had loved her, and in her own cool way she had loved him too, but...
son of Sarek, was here.
seemed that fate had conspired to furnish her with a second chance.
To the best of her knowledge, Spock was still unmated. If he had
completed the ritual with another female, she was *certain* the
chosen bride's family would have *well* announced their fortuitous
union. Nevertheless, she had made discreet enquiries back to her
family on Vulcan just to be sure.
son of Sarek.
a final cool-eyed gaze over the empty auditorium, T'Pring of Vulcan
would make her intentions known to him tomorrow. She would present
her proposal with all due respect and advise her reasoning with
her usual unimpeachable logic.
had no doubts that she would be successful.
the dimly lit bedroom of Captain Spock's designated guest quarters,
a soft gasp of unfettered pleasure echoed quietly in the warm silence.
Other sounds followed, enticing and sensual. Limbs shifting under
cool sheets. Warm skin sliding against warm skin. Breath deepening,
becoming faster, becoming louder.
God..." A tender whisper, perhaps a prayer, perhaps an expression
increased, hands and fingers intertwined. Heat rose as two bodies
raced towards fulfillment in a perfect communion of heart and mind.
from shoulder to hip by lean muscle and warm sweat slicked skin,
Leonard McCoy, blissfully happy and languidly expectant, lay under
his beautiful mate. He welcomed this joining of their bodies and
minds as he always did.
homecoming. Pure and simple.
had been three months since Spock had returned to him and their
lovemaking was still incredibly intense. There was almost a kind
of gentle anguish to it, a nearly desperate need to get closer,
to assure each other that this was real.
invitation to the conference had been welcomed by both bondmates
as a chance for a diverting trip into space without the additional
burden of duty. Both shared an interest in Xenobiology and were
eager to bring themselves up to date via the scheduled presentations.
knew that the next time they set out with the Enterprise, things
would be very different. They would be openly sharing a quarters
for a start. They had advised the bridge crew and their respective
families of their true status shortly after their reunion on Earth.
For now it was still not common knowledge but it would only be a
matter of time before word spread.
realized that a small part of him would mourn the loss of their
unique anonymity; this secret that he and Spock had shared for so
long that it was almost like an old friend.
gasped again as he felt his mate moving inside him, deep and slow.
The rhythm of desire, the dance of physical fulfillment. He lifted
his legs, linking his ankles over Spock's surging back and allowing
his mate to penetrate deeper into his body.
Spock's silent cry into the halls of Leonard's mind carried with
it all of the Vulcan's adoration and desire.
Spock.// Leonard slid his hand down the sleek plains of his lover's
strong back. //Deeper, beautiful... get closer... closer.//
hard now, thrusting deeply, Spock slid his forearms under Leonard's
shoulders and gathered him close. Strong, slender hands cupped the
human's head as the Vulcan descended to kiss him. The mouth that
slanted over Leonard's lips was hot and searching. Needy. Stealing
his breath and his heart...
feeling of that solid shaft inside his body, stroking and stroking,
unremitting and insistent... the sensation of his own almost painfully
swollen sex trapped between their sweat slicked bodies, rubbing
deliciously against the firm flesh of Spock's belly. The heat, the
rising fire, it was too much... too much... never enough...
God!// Leonard clutched at his mate's back. Their scent surrounded
him, their sweat anointed him. //Comin' beautiful... Oh, Oh God,
me, beloved.// Spock's silent reply was a tortured mental groan,
thick with pleasure, ragged with need. //Always... with... me...//
wave crested and broke over them both; Leonard's almost wild cries
were a sudden wailing counterpoint to the deep and heartfelt groan
that was torn from his Vulcan mate's shuddering chest. The pleasure
surged and burned them, echoing back and forth between then as they
rode out this shattering climax together, feeling their orgasms
blend and merge until they were no longer certain who's they were
endless moments afterwards they lay gasping and spent, clinging
to each other as the silvery shimmers of sexual afterglow pulsed
through their bodies.
kissed Leonard deeply as he gently withdrew, allowing his mate to
pull him down and hold him tightly.
love you, Spock. You know that." Leonard's voice echoed with
touched his face gently. "I do, beloved. We are forever."
and contented, they slept tangled up together in the twisted sheets.
bided her time throughout the day reasoning, and rightly so, that
an opportunity would present itself at the evening's reception for
was forced to admit, she was a little surprised that Spock had not
so far seen fit to approach her himself. Ample opportunity to do
so had come over the course of the day, yet he had remained distant.
She reasoned that perhaps he felt that his presence would not be
intended to disabuse him of such notions in short order.
scanned the gathered crowd within the lavishly decorated function
room and found her quarry almost immediately.
eyes narrowed slightly as she took in Spock's current companion.
The human, Doctor McCoy, was yet again in Spock's company. She had
seen them together earlier in the station's day and she assumed
that they had attended the conference together as colleagues. She
knew that they had been crewmates on board the Enterprise for a
long time now and she could vaguely recall the man himself from
that brief meeting so may years ago.
found herself hopeful that the human would soon find some other
cohort to occupy his evening with. Her intended offer to Spock would
be far simpler to instigate without an audience in attendance.
if spurred by her very thoughts, McCoy began to move away, making
his way through the press of bodies towards the buffet table at
the far side of the room.
her slender shoulders, T'Pring began to weave her way through the
crowd. As she closed the distance, she began to carefully project
certain empathic signals to the tall esoteric Vulcan hybrid who
so intently watched his human colleague.
and coquettish, her silent messages of approval and interest flowed
from her in a continuous stream. The Vulcan equivalent of flirting.
was almost at Spock's elbow before he turned his head to appraise
stopped cold, almost frozen on the spot. Of all the reactions she
could have anticipated, *this* had not occurred to her.
had expected curiosity, possibly interest, perhaps even disapproval.
All of these things she had been more than ready to deal with. She
had formed her replies, her tactics, her plans. She had ensured
a response for almost any reaction.
was not however, prepared for indifference.
nod of greeting was appropriately polite, but that was all. Not
a flicker of interest showed in that obsidian eyed gaze. Not one
single encouraging sign.
knew he could sense her bafflement and she saw a certain softening
of his countenance. With an elegant arch of a sable brow, he turned
his gaze once more to the human, McCoy.
did not open himself too much, just a touch. Just enough for her
to feel the very edges of it. Unable to help herself, she gasped
softly at the sheer intensity of desire and adoration that Spock
was suddenly exuding.
the miraculous passion of a Vulcan coupled with the hot-blooded
sexuality of his human half. Overwhelming affection, unbreakable
devotion, deep and abiding love.
for the human, McCoy.
was his mate.
all the dignity she could muster, T'Pring drew herself up and nodded
both her greeting and her farewell. Then she turned on her heel
and left the reception without looking back.
she walked away the familiar echoes of regret filled her once again.
would never again lay eyes on Spock, son of Sarak.
Leonard's soft voice drew Spock's immediate attention. "I felt
something pretty damn monumental happening over here. You wanna
fill me in?"
believe the answer to your query is just about to leave the room,
beloved." Spock nodded to the exit.
his gaze, Leonard vented a low slow whistle. "Well, I'll be
damned. I didn't think she'd have the brass to come anywhere *near*
you after what happened." He frowned slightly. "What did
dark eyes turned to him, his gaze filled with warmth. "Something
she can never have."
face grew concerned as the full import of Spock's comment dawned
on him. He laid his hand on his mate's shoulder. "Are you OK,
am, Leonard." Spock's brow arched in amusement. "Although
the memories of that koon-ut-kel-if-fee are unpleasant at best,
my meeting with T'Pring *did* serve to inspire an enjoyable recollection."
The shore leave lottery that took place not long after."
regarded his mate with delight shining in his blue eyes. "Spock?"
say we go camping when we get back home?"