the Mob's Viagra black market
file under: tres misc
I guess the mafia has gotten bored with Mario Puzo and is modeling itself after The Sopranos now.
The Gambino crime family has been stockpiling Viagra and a pharmacy full of other prescription drugs allegedly supplied by three prominent Westchester doctors, the Daily News has learned.
Monday, June 20, 2005, by Eric J
Heinz corporababble
file under: Corporate Overlords
“This acquisition underscores our commitment to become a faster-growing, more focused company,” said Heinz president and chief executive William Johnson. Buying HP Foods was “consistent with our strategy to drive growth in our profitable and expanding core condiments and sauces category,” he said.
Call me easily amused, but that quote made my day.
Monday, June 20, 2005, by Eric J
bachelor home companion: Safeway Verdi
file under: Consume Reviews
The 7” Safeway “Verdi Roasted Mushroom & Garlic Delizioso” pizzas were on sale for two bucks each, tough to pass up. I figured it would stay in the freezer a month before I got around to it, but time and hunger calls.
(I refuse to believe the word “delizioso” is real Italian, and if I’m wrong, please don’t correct me.)
The dough isn’t really pizza dough; it’s some kind of bread, which isn’t as egregious a sin as passing off puffed-up bread as bagels, but worth a demerit. The rest of it isn’t too bad. You can taste the garlic, which is a lot more than I had hoped for from Safeway© pizza.
If pizza were sex: cheap, satisfying, wouldn’t want it around all the time. Do I have to say it? This is the fuck-buddy of pizza.
previous entries:
Thursday, April 21, 2005, by Eric J
bachelor home companion: American Flatbread
file under: Consume Reviews
I’ve seen American Flatbread’s plain, white, almost Repo Man-esque boxes in the freezer at Zupan’s, and my interest lasted just long enough to set my eyes on the price tag—nearly twice that of a normal frozen pizza. No thanks. But they finally went on sale.
So: Tomato Sauce and Three Cheese Pizza Flatbread. Nice box, the lack of a photo of the pizza suggests confidence in the product. Good graphic design. And some interesting copy on the back…
I remember the afternoon I walked by the Shriner’s barn institute for Children in Boston. I looked up at the windows and tried to imagine what is was like for the kids inside: working to get well; struggling with their fears; some literally fighting for their lives. My heart ached for them. How could I help? I am neither doctor nor nurse nor social worker. What could I do? blah blah something do no harm something This is pizza with integrity.
Sally Struthers has nothing on this guy.
The dough was good, thin and crunchy in the center, not overwhelming around the edges. Obviously handmade. The cheese was some of the best I’ve had in a frozen pizza. Creamy, nicely herbed, buttery taste. The tomato sauce… bland. Really bland.
if pizza were sex: (I’m going to swap genders for no apparent reason) A good, satisfying roll in the sheets, if not the best you’ve ever had. But just when you’re starting to snuggle up and enjoy the warmth of him and the comforter, he tells you about the trip to Africa he’s planning this summer, and about the plight of the starving children, and something about the Bataan Death March, and now you’re trying to figure out how to get your clothes on and out the door without it being all weird.
Saturday, April 16, 2005, by Eric J
Dance Insurance Revolution
file under: Play
I’ve written about Get Up Move, a site that promotes Dance Dance Revolution as a way to get fit and lose weight, but the site loses a little credibility with me because it’s backed by the manufacturers of some DDR pads and the site isn’t 100% up-front about it.
But the idea is gaining legitimacy: CNN reports that a West Virginia health insurance company is hoping to cut costs by studying children who play DDR. “Today’s kids are tomorrow’s members,” said the insurance group’s Nidia Henderson. “Obesity claims last year cost us $77 million. We have to curtail those costs.”
So cool. But please, somebody tell this kid that even if he loses weight, his health benefits might be curtailed if his peers catch him dancing and wearing a “tough guys wear pink” t-shirt all the time.
Monday, April 4, 2005, by Eric J
yourcompanysucks.com
file under: Corporate Overlords
Forbes has a hysterical article on the top 10 ”___ sucks” websites. How does Walmart respond?
We have seen some corporate complaint sites. We don’t spend a lot of time on them. The people on them think they gain an advantage by doing them. Some people simply do not want us to succeed. They feel they can gain an advantage by making us look bad. We know that there is misinformation about Wal-Mart out there. We launched our own Web site in January to make sure our facts are correct, Walmartfacts.com.
Will do.
Wednesday, March 9, 2005, by Eric J
great moments in kitchen design
file under: Buy Stuff
Take that, fucker.
Wednesday, February 23, 2005, by Eric J
Moleskinerie
file under: Mind Control Buy Stuff
Moleskines are “the legendary notebook of Van Gogh, Matisse and Picasso.” It’s basically a notebook with a handy built-in rubber band to keep it shut.
But I’ll be damned if their Lomo-esque marketing hasn’t paid off—I own three of the silly things. And now there’s a whole blog dedicated to Moleskines. The blog would be insufferable if the authors weren’t so engaged in the creative use of notebooks, and even expanding their vision to quality writing materials and other topics. So it’s a blog about Moleskines, but really it’s a blog about notebooks. And notebooks are totally cool.
Tuesday, February 22, 2005, by Eric J
Jolt jolts itself
file under: Consume
Jolt Cola, the plucky little soft drink that never quite conquered the marketplace but keeps trying, has updated its look and its containers.
Jolt was originally invented by Pepsi-Cola, an attempt at competing with coffee (hah!). Somewhere along the line the brand either got spun-off or sold, and can now be found at specialty shops and Fry’s Electronics. It’s managed to carve out a nice little cult following.
The new containers are aluminum bottles with twist-off caps. In addition to three existing flavors (Cola, “Cherry Bomb,” and “Blue,” a surprisingly tasty berry soda), there’s a new zero-calorie Jolt Ultra. BevNet has a favorable review of the new offering. I can’t wait to get my hands on these—besides being a winner of a soda, aluminum bottles are fun for storing water in the fridge.
Tuesday, February 22, 2005, by Eric J
steal this idea: Trader Joe's of fast food
file under: Think Consume
Ever had one of those ideas that, given the resources and capital, you're convinced would be worth a million bucks? Me too. And since I'm quite sure I'll never have the resources or capital to follow up on a few of these, I'm gonna give 'em away in hopes that someone with resources and capital will think about it.
I was munching on some of these delicious spinach nuggets from Trader Joe's, and thought, "golly, if McDonald's were selling food like this, the company wouldn't be in such a tailspin."
But it would never work at McDonald's. For one thing, people who want healthy food don't eat at McDonald's. Also, McDee's has already tried this, with their sad little attempts at creating a healthy menu (including a salad that somehow packs more fat than a cheeseburger). McDonald's is past the point of fooling anyone. They'd do better to just follow Hardee's example and admit that they sell gross, fat food for gross, fat people (and folks who like to dilettante at being gross and fat ;). [more]
Tuesday, February 22, 2005, by Eric J
Deveroos
file under: Design
Threadless meets Underoos: artist Yoko Devereaux presents Deveroos.
Friday, December 31, 2004, by Eric J
quickies
file under: tres misc
- JFK and much, much more.
- Here’s a different way for the fast-foodies to fight obesity: bring a proof-of-purchase from Taco Bell®, Pizza Hut®, KFC®, Long John Silver’s® or A&W® Restaurants to Bally Total Fitness and get a free four-week membership.
- I’m kicking myself for not linking to the Mighty Goods blog during the holiday shopping season. Lots of neat stuff.
- Progressive Shopper, a grocery trade rag (!), reports that the first drive-through supermarkets will appear this year.
- goodbye Die Puny Humans
Friday, December 31, 2004, by Eric J
3D kiosks coming soon
file under: Science! Mind Control
And once again science is used for the embetterment of mankind.
Wednesday, December 22, 2004, by Eric J
xmas sales down
file under: tres misc
So apparently retail sales for the Christmas season suck so far. Could mean big discounts for last minute shoppers. (hooray for holiday procrastination!)
Monday, December 20, 2004, by Eric J
bachelor home companion: Trader Joe's Margherita
file under: Reviews Consume
Trader Joe’s foods are generally much cheaper, and paradoxically also of much higher quality than typical supermarket fare. So the Trader Joe’s (er, “Gianni’s”—hurr) Margherita pizza packs a lot of promise.
The first thing is, this isn’t a Margherita pizza at all. A Mergherita has tomatoes (sliced or occasionally diced), and olive oil and basil instead of tomato sauce. This pizza has tomato sauce, but no tomatoes.
The cheese is unusual; there’s a layer of crumbled grana (a yummy, hard Italian cheese), and then several slices of mozarella. I don’t know why a melted slice of cheese tastes different than melted shredded cheese, but it does, and I don’t think slices on pizza are the way to go.
It’s not bad, really, just a bit weird. And it’s not a Margherita.
if pizza were sex: This is one of those people who thinks they’re really good in bed, and has a few “moves” that they think are sexy but are really just odd. And is a strange kisser.
Interesting, but no thanks.
