Title: Sea Horn
Author: Rosemending email@example.com
Rating: R for mature themes
Warning: Gender fuckery! Het-ness!! But not really.
Summary: Elijah and Orlando get married and have four children.
Disclaimer: Although I have never met him, I am sure Orlando is
definitely male, for sure. Despite his name.
Author's note: So I was reading A.S. Byatt and in it they talked
about this mermaid like creature and the analysis was that the
tail was a symbol of the cock. I now derogate the idea with my
One day Elijah walked into archery practice. He found Orlando
by the water bucket, sprinkling water over her face. Orlando was
singing softly to herself and Elijah had never seen such a beautiful
Her skin glowed pink like pearls, her eyes were
deep as the sea and her form was lithe like a fish.
"Hi," said Elijah, approaching her carefully.
Orlando blushed as Elijah neared. She brushed her
blond wig out of her face and smiled shyly.
"What's your name?" asked Elijah.
"Orlando," Orlando replied.
"What a lovely name," said Elijah, his
eyes searching her gentle face.
Orlando nodded politely and made as if to go away.
"I'm sorry!" Elijah put his hand on her
sleeve. "But I must tell you, I am completely enchanted by
Orlando seemed surprised by this admission, as if
she did not know her own beauty. But she smiled at Elijah and
seemed pleased with him.
In less than a year, they were married. Orlando
was a devoted and loving wife. She modeled and acted occasionally,
but mainly, she looked after their home.
The trouble began when Orlando gave birth to their
first child. The child had Elijah's eyes but it was blind. A year
later, Orlando had twins. One of whom had scales on his skin and
the other deformed growths on his head, which looked like three
These children were clever and despite their abnormalities
they thrived. The eldest could sing like her mother and moved
people to tears when she did. One of the twins were uncommonly
strong and the other exceptionally fast at running.
Meanwhile, Elijah's career prospered and apart from
his children's oddities, his home was a happy and prosperous one.
Orlando looked after their children with great care. Yet Elijah
became bitter and angry about their misfortune. When Orlando became
pregnant with their fourth child, Elijah cast Orlando strange
"I would like, for once, to have something
natural," said Elijah. "Not another abominable creature
like what you've given me so far."
Orlando wept at this, but there was nothing she
could do to remedy what she knew would happen.
Orlando's fourth child was a monster. It, for the
sex was indistinguishable, had a tail and wings, was all teeth
and hair, its screams panicked the neighbours and it smelt like
rotten seaweed. It was so inconceivably ill-formed that it died
soon after the delivery. Elijah had the doctors incinerate the
unsightly remains and he turned his back on Orlando when Orlando
cried for its fate.
When they went home, Orlando wanted a bath. Orlando
liked to have milk baths or foam baths or put in his bathwater
sea salt, essential oils, petals and extracts. Orlando spent hours
in the bath, for it was a pleasure he could enjoy alone.
Elijah would have left Orlando to it. After all,
many years of marriage had worn away Elijah's passion for Orlando's
slim body. But this time, Elijah grew strangely curious.
What does she do when I am not there? Elijah wondered.
Listen to her, splashing and singing. I wonder if she is touching
herself in there. God knows I will never touch her again, better
that there's no more spawn from her.
Then Elijah thought, but I would like to see her
in the bath. So Elijah went upstairs and opened the bathroom door
Elijah saw Orlando sit in a pool of bubbles, washing
her torso, swiping her hands over her small breasts. Elijah saw
Orlando pull up her legs and wash her toes. She was as beautiful,
if not more, than when Elijah first met her. She had scarcely
aged and kept her figure. Her skin was tight and her flesh taut.
Humming softly, Orlando lifted her hips and washed
between her legs. The bubbles drowned and Elijah could glimpse
into the green water. There was a white thing there, bobbing up
and down. It was the size of a small lobster and had the shape
of a sea horn. Elijah watched as Orlando closed his eyes and flicked
his penis out of the water. Orlando fisted it and began to sing.
Elijah banged the door shut and ran from their home.
Orlando's singing stopped abruptly as he realised Elijah's discovery.
When Elijah returned all of Orlando's stuff were
gone. So were the children, all three had been taken. In the wake
of Orlando's departure, all the flowers in the garden had wilted
and all the window glass were broken.
Elijah could hear the sound of Orlando's singing
on the wind as it howled through his house. It sounded sweet and
throaty. And Elijah half wished that he'd never seen Orlando's
true form in the bath, and Elijah wished for Orlando and the children
to return. But what Elijah wished for most of all, was to have
had the courage to wade in.