Give 'em hell, Jim

Take it up with Star Fleet, lady!!

 

Welcome to nokilli.com, no wait, that's nokilli dot khaaan. It's such a happy world we live in.

Trekkies 2 Sacramento premiere - July 2004.

The No Kill I is a Star Trek punk rock band that's been around since 1993. Don't ask me why, because I sure as hell don't know, but we were a Hogan's Heroes band for a little while. Shows are usually pretty out of control what with the booze and the destruction and the flames and the costumes and the fights and the blood and the gore and the spitting.

From a show at the Capital Garage, "That wasn't even funny, they're just a bunch of drunks."

We celebrated our 10 years as a band being filmed for Trekkies 2 on July 26, 2003. I'm sure you must've seen Trekkies. It's pretty danged good. It would've been better if they filmed us for the 1st Trekkies back when we were young loudmouths, because now we're all old retards, but gabba gabba hey...

The best quote at that show was after Cap'n Kirk had his pants pulled down. Some random girl, "He's got prettier panties than me!"

Trekkies 2 Hollywood Premiere Review!

Sacramento Trekkies 2 Premiere & Soundtrack Review!!

Check out other show reports.

Inside this chuckleheaded site mostly written by a chump with a hole in his head (another true story), there's pictures and vital info scanned in. Names and places and events known to none but ourselves. I use "known" in a theoretical sense because Gornzilla, the Cap'n, and The Abe Lincoln are playing blacked-out drunk. No, really. It's quite professional and if you don't remember doing something, you don't regret it or even have to apologize. It's a lot like going back into time. Time traveling through a bottle.

Cast and Crew:

The Singing Sassmaster - Cap'n Kirk. Or Cap'n Pike when he broke his leg and played in a wheelchair. We spray-painted a box black and stuck it over him. He sat there looking vacant flashing his lights. We had to pour beer into him. I love being in this band.

Drumming Duties - Mr. Spock or sometimes a Romulan, Andorian, or Evil Spock from Mirror Mirror

Guitar Diva - Yeoman Rand. Man, how'd we get a girl anywhere near Star Trek let alone a Star Trek band?

Keyboarding Queen - Sheman Rand (6 foot cross-dresser) So geeky, s/he owns a comic book store.

Guitar Geek - The Hard Drinkin' Abe Lincoln (if you catch that Star Trek reference you really are a geek). Formerly Red Shirt Expendable Guy. Used to be Trekkie Guy. Used to be "Dr. McCoy" with quotes, natch (not quote snatch). By the way, the real Hard Drinkin' Lincoln is available here. Well worth 2 bits. Tell them you found it through us, and Mr. Wong is even better.

Bass holder (not player) liquor pig - Mugatu. Often Gornzilla.

Other crew:

Baron von Grizman - The Red Suit Expendable Guy That Which Writes the Funny Lyrics

For a while, Mr. Spock was in Amok Time (Logan, we have a runner), and we had The Orion Slave Girl Whom No Man Can Resist on drums (s/he's too sweaty so we left shim on the Planet of the Ding Dang).

Geek Around The World! The Gornzilla Mugatu dork who writes most of this site is riding a 40-year-old Ducati 250cc round the world starting in October, 2004. Figure it'll take 4 years. But there still could be No Kill I shows (there's been offers to fly him back to the US), but who knows. If you want to give him a tour of your town or a place to stay, check out that page and send some email. I swear I'm not as bad as I make myself seem, I just like making fun of myself.

  History
  Incredibly True Show Stories
  Upcoming Events
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NKI songs for free!!

  Recording Log
  Song Lyrics
  Reviews, Links & Other Star Trek bands
  No Kill I: The Next Generation
  Shatner vs Heston
  very short (173k) No Kill I wav You should listen to it, yup.
  Message Board
 

 

No Kill I

PO Box 2414
Sacramento, CA 95812-2414

die gorn die

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Updated October 12, 2004

 

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