12 Jul 06
Now, I’m as interested as the next guy in seeing Sylvester Stallone take an ungodly beating. So the trailer for this year’s Rocky Balboa, pitting the aging southpaw against the current world champion for an exhibition bout, does have that going for it.
That’s for Stop or My Mom Will Shoot. That’s for Oscar. That’s for Tango & Cash. That’s for Frank Stallone…
But, c’mon — for serious? Sly just turned the big 6-0, fifteen more rings around the old tree than George Foreman had when he utterly stunned the world by grabbing back the World Heavyweight belt. Even though, true to the franchise, Rocky’s goal will surely be to “just hang in there” and “not get killed,” watching a near senior citizen get his clock cleaned with a sledgehammer in the inevitable fifteen-minute climax fight starts to verge on elder abuse.
Maybe Rocky Balboa will be perfectly pitched to Boomers and near-Boomers as a fable of exertion and heart defying the ravages of age. Our Commander-in-Chief, another slightly touched fitness nut, also just turned 60. Apparently, foolish women of a certain age go in for one last botox, while their male counterparts look around for one last war.
Who to the what, now?! That’s [i]insane.[/i] Would a boxer that age even be allowed in the ring for a legitimate bout?
July 13th, 2006 at 1:21 pm
I wouldn’t think so, especially considering that Rocky had to retire in V because of severe brain damage. I DO hope that Sly respects the continuity of the franchise.
July 13th, 2006 at 1:33 pm
Rocky VII: After being killed in the ring, Sylvester Stallone returns from the dead in order to fight the King of the Zombies…
But first he has to get a pep talk from Naomi Watts. Because she knows all about rings, you know…
July 13th, 2006 at 7:37 pm
I thought it was Elijah Woods who knows all about rings.
This was one of many, many trailers that was shown before “Dead Man’s Chest.” We had a near-capacity audience, and there was a collective gasp when the trailer started (”oh, dear God, no”), then dead silence as everyone realized this wasn’t a joke. I’d heard about the inevitability of the movie, so I didn’t gasp along, but damn, I hate it when I have to feel embarrassed for someone, like old Stallone…
July 13th, 2006 at 11:52 pm
Is the title fight against Hilary Swank?
July 14th, 2006 at 9:44 pm
Come on. Rocky VI, Rambo IV, Die Hard IV. We’re looking at the resurgence of 80s action in its purest form. I can’t WAIT. Miami Vice is basically Lethal Weapon V.
July 14th, 2006 at 10:02 pm
Let’s hope so. Hilary would kick Sly’s ass.
Don’t give them any more ideas!
July 15th, 2006 at 1:46 am
I thought it was Bad Boys 2.
July 16th, 2006 at 6:46 am
I thought Bad Boys 1 was Lethal Weapon V.
July 16th, 2006 at 10:16 am
Bad Boys I came out before Lethal Weapon IV, thus making it the true Lethal Weapon IV. Lethal Weapon IV is Lethal Weapon V, and Bad Boys II is Lethal Weapon VI, thus making Miami Vice Lethal Weapon VII. And that’s if you don’t count any of these movies.
July 16th, 2006 at 1:27 pm
Me neither, especially the new RAMBO. Especially if they make it as overblown and stupid as the second one! ROCKY VI could rock too if it’s in the style of IV, one of my all-time guilty-pleasures. Come on Stallone, we need another half dozen musical montages!
July 17th, 2006 at 1:30 am
I don’t think Sly is playing this role as his own age of 60 years. Rocky will be 48-50 bracket if this is indeed based loosley on George Foremans famous comeback.
He should play the role with a bit of a belly though to give it some realism.
July 17th, 2006 at 10:04 am
The thing with the Lethal Weapon series is that the white guy was crazier than the black guy.
July 17th, 2006 at 6:12 pm
The sad part about Stallone and this sequel is that his first Rocky movie actually showed such promise. Sure, it is hardly comparable to Network or Taxi Driver but it is so much better than the films he’s made since that one can’t help wondering what happened.
Maybe Stallone owes a better debt to director John Avildson than he has yet to acknowledge…
July 27th, 2006 at 8:25 pm
You’re right, T. Kruger. The original Rocky just had a great screenplay and everyone involved was unambitious at that point in their careers. After seeing Rocky III and Rocky IV during my childhood, and parts of the Rambo movies, I finally watched the original Rocky in college (looking for a movie I could make fun of) and was just amazed. The first hour or more reminded me more of “The Deer Hunter” than anything else, although I don’t know why that association was the one that came to mind.
July 29th, 2006 at 7:08 pm