The FANLESS Homepage!!

In the illustrious words of one Paul Harvey, “Oh, hey!” I just realized that I have been back at this place that I work at for 1 year now. That means that one year ago a lot of people in South Florida didn’t have any power. I can’t believe I haven’t seen anything on the innenrnets about the anniversary of Hurricane Wilma. Maybe I’ll put some pics from that on the net tonight.
Oh, wait… It’s Halloween! I should probably find something better to do than looking at old pictures.

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I feel kind of bad for Bandon’s mom who has spent the last few days in South Florida. I just noticed it is currently 11 degrees in Yakima Washington!
I’d probably feel bad for my own mom, who lives in Yakima, but she hasn’t been to Florida since 2000!

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Hello, what happened to The Miami Podcast? It’s been like 6 weeks since the last one.
Ok, it wasn’t the best podcast in the world or anything, but are there any other/better Miami/South Florida podcasts? If so, please direct my attention to them.
My listening material is getting so weak, I’m resorting to Linux/Ubuntu podcasts!
Oh, also… I updated my blog to the newest version of WordPress (2.0.5) tonight, and I updated 6 plugins. I think my recent comments thing is fucked up though. It should be showing only 3 days worth of comments.

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Hey, lqqk at me! One of my pictures is on Wikipedia!

And if you like that one, there are a bunch more here.

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LOOK MA, NO HANDS!!

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Man, if I didn’t have my tight whip sitting next to me, I’d think someone had stolen my bike and put it on ebay! It seems like whoever bought that one and this one got pretty good deals. $300 is a lot less than the $1799 they were brand new.
Also, if someone had never seen my GT Show, then they might think that this one was mine. Especially if they had seen my Hoffman EP!
ANd if you didn’t already know, that bike got jacked on April Fool’s day in 1999, but I’m slowly rebuilding a new EP.

I stayed up really late last night so I could watch the final MotoGP race live on the innernets. I got pretty close… I think within 5 minutes of the warmup, but then I fell asleep. Then once I woke up I had to stay away from the net until I could watch the race on TV at 3:30 PM.
I really didn’t think Nicky Hayden would be able to win the championship… Well, not after the last race! …but I knew he wouldn’t go down without a strong fight, so I was very moist with anticipation for this race to happen. Imagine my disappointment last saturday night when I realized I was a week too early. That made this past week really long.
Anyways, I finally got to watch the race, and the end result was worth all of the bother. After lap 4 the race was rather uneventful, but it was still fairly nerve-wracking just hoping Nicky could keep his bike running and on 2 wheels.

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Based on the fact that I am pretty much over life and can’t wait to check out, I’m pretty sure I will live forever.
Having said that, if you would like to be able to say “I slept with Christian way back when he was just 31 years old.” some day, then you need to get on the stick! I have just 2 weeks left as a 31 year old.
(this offer is only applicable to single females born before 1988. I am available for appearances anywhere within a 10 block radius of the Miami Beach jail. Further, if traveling expenses are paid. hey, traveling expenses are way cheaper than what some are charging![link possibly not safe for work])

Also… Uh… I want to say something about iSpeed but I don’t know what. Apparently it was developed by a 13 year old kid and that has placed me in a conundrum.
One one hand, it seems kind of awesome that a 13 year old can/would develop apps.
On the other hand, I can’t really say anything about iSpeed because I haven’t tried it yet. I’m too scared it will jack up my Mac. After all, it was developed by a 13 year old.
But wait… I thought it was awesome that a 13 year old can/would develop apps?
Well, yeah… But I’m still too skurred to try his app.
(actually, I wouldn’t have tried it even if it was made by a 45 year tech veteran because it’s not in english. I AM DUM AMERICAN AND I BARELY KNOW 1 LANGUAGE!!)

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This is Myles Richmond. Can you tell that I am very much into the sequence thing? If I had a better/newer camera I could have added a couple more shots to this. Like him taking off and landing. Oh, and in case you can’t tell, he’s actually traveling from right to left!

This is Robbie Maddison. This isn’t really a sequence deal, but neither of these picture were all that great on their own. I really liked that he was looking right at me so I stuck them together. Plus, I just really like whips!

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This is Drake McElroy at the last round of the 2006 Dew Action Sports Tour in Orlando Fl.
Drake can do tricks on a motorcycle.
You can email Drake by clicking on this word here.

He is designing a new site for you.

Be patient.

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Is this hot? Because one part of my brain is saying “Yes, you dickfur!! This is hot! WATCH IT AGAIN!” and another part is like “Um… this looks kind of ridiculous and she should clean her room and I think this girl might actually be young enough to be my daughter so I’m probably going to hell (or jail!) for watching this!”
PLZ ADVISE!

Also…

Same scenario.

Oh, this reminds me of last year’s Halloween when I was on Lincoln Road! I have no Halloween plans as of this moment. Maybe I’ll be on Lincoln Road again and MAYBE those girls will be there again too. That would be awesome.

P.S.: Further surfing of the tubes has lead me to the epitome of… I don’t even know where to start. If these girls were drnk when they made this video (and I’m assuming they were not), can you imaging how embarrassed they would be the next day? For fucks sake, I think I’m embarrassed for them! Is this a sure sign of me getting old? I mean, in the illustrious words of Funkmaster Flex, be clear. I have contributed countless dumb videos of me and my friends to the innernets. (more here)And maybe some people are embarrassed for me, but I’m not. Do you think that the fact that I can’t conceive what these girls were thinking when they uploaded these videos to the net means I am REALLY old?
That kind of scares me.

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These are the RSS feeds I am currently subscribed to (using RSS Menu).
Please advise if you know of a feed that I should add (even if it’s your own).

Also, please let me know if something like RSS Menu exists for Windows.

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Do you know what’s worse than having to listen to shitty music coming out of a PowerMac G5’s shitty little speaker?
Listening to people sing shittily to shitty music coming out of a PowerMac G5’s shitty little speaker!
Seriously, where is the reset button for life?

Other things annoying me at the moment:
People forwarding emails to me,instead of replying.
Also, people that write the entire text of their email in the subject line, and nothing in the body.

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…so there I am at work, and I look up and I see this guy making a fort out of truck doors and I knew exactly what was going to happen because I’ve done similar things a million times before. The main difference is that I was always in the middle of nowhere (or drnk!) when I’ve had to pee outside.

…and then the guy was like LOL PLZ DON’T REPORT ME, K?

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If you want to buy me a totally awesome birthday present, please get me a XXL TWiT hoodie!
I’m serious! I want one really REALLY r1lly bad!
Also, anything from Studio 411, SX Exposed, in particular, and I already have Nitro Circus 1-3, but I think Lock and Load is coming out next month and I am moist with anticipation for that!

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If I were the overlord of the innernets and I could control anything on the net I wanted by simply clicking on a button, these are the 5 things I would do first:
1) Bring back Amy and Steph’s blogs. Amy’s blog has been gone for only a couple of days, but I already miss it.

2) Threaded comments. I’ve tried to add threaded comments to fanless.com a couple of times, but it never worked exactly how I wanted it to. Actually, I never got them to work at all, but I blame a lack of documentation, not a lack of fully functioning brain cells. I think threaded comments are what I miss most from my liveurinal.

3) Theme changer. Back in 2000, one of the things I wanted most on a website was the ability to easily change its look. I think that for the most part, my blog would look how it looks now, but I would also have skins or whatever that were mostly black and mostly green. And maybe one that was mostly blue or red. Oh, I would also want these skins to be selected randomly on each visit.

4) Wider content area! One thing I hate about the theme I am using now is that I can’t post 800 pixel wide pictures. I can’t even post 640 px pics. I mean, I CAN, but then they run into the sidebar and that isn’t good. I like the lightbox thing well enough, but sometimes I’m too lazy to click on pics to make them bigger and 400-450 pixel wide images are just too small for me. I have a big-ass screen for a reason, ya know!

5) What am I listening to? You see that list of stuff I’ve been listening to on the sidebar? It probably lists a bunch of podcasts and maybe some Chamillionaire or rap from the 90s. Well, those tracks are clickable but clicking on them won’t take you anywhere. When I implemented that into the page, I was running dottunes and you COULD download the tracks. But then I got a little scared I was going to get sued or something and it was totally sucking up my bandwidth from home and then I moved my iTunes library to my G3 and when I tried to run dottunes on that computer I found out that my registration was tied to my iMac G5 and it was too much bother to get a new serial number. Maybe I’ll look into getting that fixed tonight.

I think I had a couple more things to add but I forgot them. OH YEAH!! At this moment I have 19,056 pictures in my iPhoto library (all taken within the last 2 years). If it were as simple as clicking a button, they would all be online right now.

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I was too lazy/over it (I spent about 90 minutes making these!) to find/create a solution for the skips.

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This is Mia. Her dad got upset when I handed her my beer, but I told him it was OK as long as her mom didn’t see!

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I don’t know who this kid is, but he was digging so hard I thought he was going to pull his brain out for sure!

As always, click on the images to make them bigger and then click on the right or left side of the image to see the next or previous image.

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Do you know what really bums me out about this year’s weak hurricane season? Fewer opportunities to capture something like this!

I don’t even watch hurricane news, but I happened to have it on when this happened, and I decided to put it on youtube. (obviously this was months ago)

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As of 10:30 AM this morning, I have 38 fresh emails in my inbox, and today I am going to attempt the impossible! I will try to address each of these emails by 6 PM!
Each email usually equals one order I need to work on, and if that average holds true today, then at my usual pace I would need… 1.5-2 days to handle them all. But not today! Today I will be trying to work double time! I just hope I don’t fuck anything up.
PLZ wish me luck! (I’ll need it.)

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I still don’t know what in the Tori Anus(.com!) is going on with this post, but in trying to decipher the 700+ comments I have come to believe that if you leave your email address and/or phone number, you get sex videos!
I have no clue who is doling out these videos, and I really rilly r1lly hope it isn’t supposed to be me because, as far as I know, I have no sex videos.
However, if you’re a really really ridiculously hot, disease free, single female at least at the age of consent in the state of Florida (or maybe you have to be 18+ to be on video) and you want to star in a sex video with me, leave a comment to this post! This is, of course, assuming that all things having to do with the sex video will not cost me any money, and will in theory earn me some money!
Otherwise, STOP FUCKING LEAVING COMMENTS TO THAT POST, YA FUCKING TOWELHEADS FANLESS.com patrons! I can’t read your mumbo jumbo typing!

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Be sure to watch Spike TV’s Scream Awards show tonight at 10 PM! I think Diora gives out an award.

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