A woman on the EDSA highway stopped her car at a red light. When the light turned green, she stayed right where she was. After the light had changed several times and she still hadn’t moved, a policeman finally went to over her and inquired politely, “What’s the matter lady, haven’t we got any colors you like?”
MANILA, Philippines -- Despite the recent assurances of Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke and US Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson, the subprime mortgage industry’s problems appear to be spreading across the globe like the Ebola virus.
I promised my wife that I would not write any more jokes about her, but I must tell you about the day we were married. I could not marry in church because, at 65, I was no longer a virgin, and so the ceremony was performed by a judge.
I have received many emails thanking me for pointing out the serious situation posed by the subprime mortgages and even the prime mortgages last week. As a result, many readers liquidated or at least reduced their equity holdings before the market crashed.
I must apologize for not writing last week, but on Friday my wife cooked my favorite prawns in chili and garlic sauce, and I fear it might have been contaminated with a touch of cyanide. Anyway, I was too ill to write though I started on my obituary.
MANILA, Philippines -- Three years ago, i startled readers of the Inquirer with an article entitled, “The hottest stock in town.” It commenced, “Sell your house, sell your wife and children and invest the proceeds in Fil-Hispano,” a totally unknown company.
I suggested to my wife that tonight we should change positions. She said, “I would really like that. Tonight, you stand by the ironing board while I lay on the couch and watch TV.”