Transcription of Hawkins' Suicide Note
OMAHA, Neb. (AP) — The Omaha Police Department on Friday released a three-page suicide note left by Robert A. Hawkins, the 19-year-old who fatally shot eight people at an Omaha shopping mall before turning the gun on himself Wednesday.
The note is transcribed below, including misspellings but with expletives deleted:
I'm so sorry for what I've put you through I never meant to hurt all of you so much and I don't blame any one of you for disowning me I just can't be a burden to you and my friends any longer You are all better off without me. I'm so sorry for this.
I've just snapped I can't take this meaningless existence anymore I've been a constant disappointment and that trend would have only continued. just remember the good times we had together
I love you mommy
I love you dad
I love you Kira
I love you Valancia
I love you Cynthia
I love you Zach
I love you Cayla
I love you Mark (P.S. I'm really sorry)
To all of my friends I'm so sorry for what I've done to you and put you through. I've been a peice of (expletive) my entire life it seems this is my only option. I know everyone will remember me as some sort of monster but please understand that I just don't want to be a burden on the ones that I care for my entire life. I just want to take a few peices of (expletive) with me. I love all of you so much and I don't want anyone to miss me just think about how much better you are off without me to support. I want my friends to remember all the good times we had together. Just think tho I'm gonna be (expletive) famous. You guys have always been there for me I'm just sad that I'm gonna have to go this alone. You guys are the best friends anyone could ever ask for. That's all I have to say is that I (expletive) you guys.
P.S. I didn't eat that (expletive) sandwich or the toielet thing either!
I'm giving my car back to my mom and my friends can have whatever else I leave behind
Signed (Hawkins' signature)
Social (his Social Security number)