The Third Leader: Tap dancing
Published: 16 November 2007
I s the tide turning in favour of tap? A new poll for the National Consumer Council has found that 70 per cent of people think restaurants charge too much for bottled water. Eighty three per cent believe waiters should offer tap water off their own bat, rather than waiting to be asked.
The Third Leader: Supermarket sweep
Published: 30 October 2007
Grocery is much in the news. While Tesco strives to inhabit yet more of the country, and the manoeuvrings for control of Sainsbury's continues, we also await the result of the Competition Commission's inquiry into the sector.
The Third Leader: Funny women
Published: 16 October 2007
A list of Britain's top wits of all time featuring Baroness Thatcher as its first woman, at 12th, is the sort of joke you would expect from a television channel renaming itself Dave.
The Third Leader: A bug's life
Published: 12 October 2007
Something of a pause in this department yesterday when we were advised of new research showing that aunts have a sense of their own mortality. An image of these much-loved creatures caught in an autumn and pensive mode was dispelled by the correcting intelligence that the species involved was, in fact, the ant.
The Third Leader: Whose practices?
Published: 11 October 2007
Iberian dismay, we note, over use of the phrase, "Spanish Practices", to describe the serpentine arrangements enjoyed by postal workers which, depending on view, suggest either a proper insistence on proper remuneration, or not so much as can do as can't do without large amounts of extra dosh, squire.
The Third Leader: Mistaken identity
Published: 10 October 2007
Our watchword in this space is sympathy, not condemnation. Others have been giving the Prime Minister rather a tough time over his dithering, prevaricating and general thrashing about in the matter of whether to call a general election.
The Third Leader: Unseasonably silly
Published: 09 October 2007
Sun shining, mellowness, but a certain something else in the air: I am intrigued to see that a phenomenon I first noticed last year is back: the Late Silly Season, an Oktoberfest of giddy oddities usually reserved for when there's nothing else going on. Only this time, it seems even bigger. No one is safe, as Australia, New Zealand, Lewis Hamilton, the post and the Prime Minister can all testify.
Charles Nevin: Shedding light on the evil of trick or treating
Published: 08 October 2007
The Church of England, I notice, is taking on the forces of evil. That unholy alliance of Satan and Mammon, Hallowe'en, is being confronted by the Bishop of Bolton.
The Third Leader: Space oddities
Published: 04 October 2007
Beep, beep. It's 50 years today since Sputnik became the planet's first artificial satellite (we should probably discount those who argue that the moon, given its exact positioning and necessity for our existence, was placed there by entity or entities unknown).
The Third Leader: Knot enough
Published: 28 September 2007
More bad news for ties: only a minority of larger British companies now insist on them, while to turn up in one anywhere else is merely to encourage that always amusing speculation about a pressing court engagement.
The Third Leader: Pipe dreams
Published: 27 September 2007
The Prime Minister, speaking at his question-and-answer session in Bournemouth yesterday, once again stressed his desire to bring all manner of people into his big tent. It seems, then, only polite to respond.
The Third Leader: Energy saving
Published: 26 September 2007
Worrying portents and indications are attracting increasing attention. Our stern Prime Minister declares that he will not rest and neither will we in his quest to maximise our talents. Meanwhile, our students are accused of being the least hard-working in Europe, and another report discloses that the fitness levels of all of us are at an all-time low. In short, it's not looking at all good for anyone who prefers to take things lying down.
The Third Leader: Stop wining
Published: 25 September 2007
Hurricanes happening in Hampshire, the Credit Crunch continuing: is there to be no end to our present alliterative strife? First, the calamitous effect of cold air colliding with hot air coming, we understand, from the general direction of Bournemouth; next, reports that the City is staggering under the influence of a fall in the price of fine wines.
Charles Nevin: You make your own luck, so have a flutter
Published: 24 September 2007
Some recent events have been making me think about luck, a subject which has fascinated many great penseurs, and that great putter, Gary Player: "It's funny, the harder I practice, the luckier I get."
The Third Leader: Special pleading
Published: 21 September 2007
Well, well. A special one, indeed. Under intense pressure after some lacklustre performances, with votes of confidence glaringly absent, he maintained his dignity and spirit, and must have felt a great measure of vindication as copious tributes were offered yesterday.
The Third Leader: Political brief
Published: 19 September 2007
Some muttering, we note, about the Prime Minister's wish to limit the speeches of his cabinet colleagues at the forthcoming Labour Party conference in Bournemouth to seven minutes. Suggestions, indeed, of a desire to control, and a feeling that all ministers should have the freedom to expatiate, won by his dashing deputy, Ms Harman.
The Third Leader: House of mirth
Published: 18 September 2007
An Italian comedian, Beppe Grillo, we report today, is having a powerful effect with his campaign to turn up the volume of the voice of the people and effect a change in the always interesting ways that many members of his country's political classes traditionally like to run things.
The Third Leader: Nettles and custard
Published: 14 September 2007
Further evidence has emerged, I see, of people with fancy ideas introducing them at the expense of unfussy traditional native practices that have been absolutely fine with our ancestors and their ancestors and never did them any harm, thank you very much.
The Third Leader: Brand values
Published: 13 September 2007
Sympathy for our governors is rarely fashionable, but sometimes you do have to fight it. De Gaulle pondered on the difficulties of running a country with 265 kinds of cheese; now, I see, our Prime Minister has to contend with a nation whose top 20 favourite brands include Aston Martin, eBay, Tate Modern and Virgin Atlantic.
The Third Leader: Parrot fashion
Published: 12 September 2007
Farewell to a dead parrot. Alex, the prodigiously vocal African Grey, has fallen, if you and he will forgive me, off the perch suddenly at home, his two by three foot cage in an American university laboratory. He was 31.
The Third Leader: Tears of joy
Published: 11 September 2007
Often, when studying events and announcements, it is possible to conceive that there are few surprises left. But then not only do England win well at football but there is also positive news of Naomi Campbell, who is organising a fashion show to raise money for victims of this summer's floods.
The Third Leader: Commercial breaks
Published: 06 September 2007
Cue advert, all sepia and class, with familiar Continental art movie music. A man bearing a striking resemblance to Rene in 'Allo 'Allo crouches behind bar, dolefully surveying ruck going down on other side featuring snarling pink faces employing their limited foreheads for offensive purposes while other parts of them propel furniture and each other over prone figures slumped serially. A slogan appears: "Damage: reassuringly extensive."
The Third Leader: Room with a view
Published: 05 September 2007
Sometimes it can be testing, maintaining the enthusiastic, open outlook which distinguishes this newspaper and this space in particular. Still reeling from the news that many journalists are writing their own Wiki entries, I now read that some of the purportedly independent online reviews of hotels are not as they seem.
The Third Leader: Lost leaders
Published: 04 September 2007
It is often unwise to expect too much from world leaders. Their unprepared thoughts and instant aperçus tend especially to disappoint those seeking any great insights.
The Third Leader: Funny food
Published: 31 August 2007
Unpalatable news for our more fastidious foodies to digest: the British appetite for ready meals, already the biggest in Europe, seems insatiable.
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