23 feb 07SPECIAL BULLETIN
if you have a transmitter in your car that broadcasts your ipod's audio signal to your FM radio, you have probably noticed that it's not the best technology -- most of the time, there is interference, and sometimes it's so bad that the music is completely obscured by static. changing the broadcast frequency sometimes helps for a little while, but it's only a matter of time before more interference seeps in on the new channel.
those days are over.
all you have to do -- this is it -- is remove your car's antenna. just unscrew that sucker, take it right off, and toss it in the backseat. of course, this is provided you don't have one o' dem new-fangled auto-retractable antennas, in wich case your only option is to kill yourself, or maybe get some bolt cutters.
after the antenna is off, it's like a dimensional gateway to a new world of ipod sound clarity has been opened up; you may as well be listening to a CD player. well, maybe not that good, but pretty damn good. i'm sure it also depends on the quality of your car stereo (mine isn't that good), but you get my point: removing your outside car antenna brings a profound improvement in FM-transmitter/ipod sound quality, and will bring a profound improvement in the quality of your life. well, it did for me, but that's because i deliver pizzas for a living.
i discovered this at the car wash, where i was instructed by a placard to remove my antenna before being scrubbed. after i took it off, for some reason i decided to see how ipod transmission fared without an antenna; perhaps something told me a revolution was at hand. needless to say i was shocked, that fateful day at the car wash.
i suppose the lack of an antenna cuts down on the amount of broadcast signals in and around the car, since none are attracted or channeled. then, the tiny, short-range transmitter can better do its work without any competitors.
of course, this means one can no longer listen to radio stations' broadcasts, but it's a small price to pay for "metallica" and "children of bodom" coming out of one's speakers clearly.
and, of course, if you want to listen to "my word" on NPR or some crap, you can always screw the antenna back in, if you don't lose it. car antennas also make surpisingly effective weapons (imagine one whipping across your cheek), so there's that on top of that.
i hope to get the word out. there's a whole website (which happens to be down at the moment) dedicated to listening to an ipod in the car; i think i'm going to email this text to them, especially since they also and rightly condemn ipod transmitter technology.
i wonder if anyone else has discovered the secret.
by the way: don't blame me if this doesn't work and in the process of carrying it out you destroy all of your posessions and your house burns down. wonderful country we live in. usa! usa!
...or just go back to the index