The TV Zone

No disrespect intended, but the passing of the Maharishi Mahesh Yogi, the guru to the stars, made me immediately think of one of my favorite ‘60s episodes of all time.

That would be the 1968 “Groovy Guru” episode of “Get Smart,” which captured perfectly how adult TV writers tried to get their heads around the youth culture of the 1960s. In it, Larry (“F Troop”) Storch plays the title character, whose evil spells are causing the nation’s teenagers to incessantly dance. It’s up to Max and 99 to thwart his insidious plans.

Here’s a more detailed description of the episode, courtesy of the “Get Smart”-obsessed folks at wouldyoubelieve.com:

The episode, by the way, was ranked as one of the 100 best episodes ever by TV Guide.

Again, apologies to M.M. Yogi (as the Newsday obit’s headline called him — I’ve never seen him referred to as such), but what can I say, this is how my mind works.

Photo: Larry Storch as the Groovy Guru

Even though Barry Morse appeared in more than 3,000 TV, film and stage roles, he’ll always be best remembered as the relentless Lt. Philip Gerard on “The Fugitive.” The Canadian actor died Saturday at 89, although his death was not announced until Monday.

For four seasons, Lt. Gerard doggedly pursued Dr. Richard Kimble (David Janssen), a prisoner wrongfully convicted of murdering his wife.

The series opened in 1963 with Gerard taking Kimble to the Big House to be executed when the train in which they were riding derailed. Gerard was knocked unconscious and Kimble escaped.

Their cat-and-mouse game ended on Aug. 29, 1967 in “The Fugitive’s” final episode when Gerard shot the infamous one-armed man, the true killer of Kimble’s wife. At the time, the episode was the most-watched in TV history.

“He thought it was a good show -- well filmed, well directed and well acted,” the actor’s son Hayward Morse said. “He had nothing disparaging to say about 'The Fugitive.”

And by the way, the name Gerard was inspired by Javert, the relentless pursuer in Victor Hugo’s “Les Miserables.”

Check out the opening sequence from the final episode here.

Photo: David Janssen and Barry Morse in their "Fugitive" days.

Cable’s Hallmark Channel continues its pursuit of baby boomers — the same demographic coveted by TV Land.

The channel completed one of its biggest series acquisition deals this week, grabbing rights to "7th Heaven," "Cheers" and "I Love Lucy" along with additional episodes of "Matlock" and "Touched by an Angel," according to the Hollywood Reporter.

"7th Heaven" will be the first of the three newly acquired series available to the network, where it will launch as early as January, while "Cheers" will become available later next year and "Lucy" in January 2009. The deal includes rights to all episodes of all three series.

Hallmark already airs reruns of two Boomer-friendly shows, "M*A*S*H" and "Little House on the Prairie."

"Angel," which previously aired on the network, will return in January, while the newly acquired episodes of "Matlock" will join those already running on the channel.

I love watching reruns and unexpectedly seeing well-known performers Before They Were Stars.

Last night, I stumbled yet again on a “White Shadow” rerun on YES and discovered a very young future Broadway star Brian Stokes Mitchell, then billed as “Brian Mitchell.”

Mitchell played a thuggish student named Lucius Robinson, who provoked Coach Reeves (Ken Howard) into a fight. Ever the earnest liberal, Ken tried to “understand” Lucius (the kid said his dad was an absent alcoholic, the family was on welfare and he lived in a slum), so he wouldn’t press charges.

But Ken changed his mind after seeing Lucius’ permanent record card, and cemented it by visiting his “slum” house, which turned ou to be a nice, middle-class ranch and meeting the boy's parents, including his hard-working postman father. The parents admitted Lucius was the bad seed in the family, and couldn’t understand why.

The bad seed part was certainly true — the episode ended when Lucius attempted to rape the vice-principal in her office, only to be interrupted and pummelled by Coach Reeves, who then commanded her to call the cops.

Mitchell showed great acting chops here, and of course, in the ensuing three decades, went on to a distinguished acting career, especially on Broadway. He won a 2000 Tony Award as Best Actor (Musical) for a revival of Cole Porter's “Kiss Me, Kate.”

He later added the “Stokes” to his name because there were too many other Brian Mitchells in Hollywood. Stokes, by the way, is his mother's maiden name.

I’m the first to admit that my life has been extremely influenced by Rolling Stone, to which I faithfully subscribed from 1967 to 1982.

Growing up on Long Island, I used RS as my biweekly ticket to the counterculture I so desperately wanted to be a part of. It influenced everything from my vocabulary to my musical tastes to writing style. (And no, I’m not bitter beacause I was turned down for a job there as a copy editor in 1978.)

But honestly, it hasn’t really been a part of my life for quite awhile, except as a nostalgic artifact.

In fact, I’d guess most boomers haven’t perused a copy of RS since the beginning of the Reagan administration, unless they happen to pick up their kids' (or grandkids') copy.

So I was a little skeptical when I sat down to watch the Paul Shaffer-hosted “Rolling Stone Magazine: Voice of Our Generation,” which airs Saturday at 7:30 p.m. on WLIW/21 (PBS loves boomers, as we all know.)

Celebrating RS' 40th anniversary, the show re-traces yet again the mag’s journey from counterculture San Francisco-based rag
into slick Manhattan periodical. A worthy tale, but one told many times.

And what about that “Voice of Our Generation?” ... well, maybe up to a point. It’s more likely that AARP, the magazine, with its articles about when to apply for Social Security or best arthritis cures, is today’s voice of our generation.

Nevertheless, title aside , this special does contain lots of fun clips to watch, ranging from the Beatles doing “We Can Work It Out” to Creedence Clearwater Revival’s “Down on the Corner” and Bruce Springsteen performing “Glory Days.” All those and John Denver and the Carpenters, too.

For those alone, I’d recommend tuning in.

TV fans, of course, remember the late Robert Goulet from his scores of appearances on variety and talk shows over the years.

But how many of you out there remember when he actually starred in a serious, World War II-era espionage drama?

The show in question was “Blue Light” and back in January 1966, ABC had high hopes for it.
The show debuted on the same night the network launched the soon-to-be-smash “Batman” as part of its then-radical notion of a “second season.” (Fancy way of saying our fall shows really stunk.)

In “Blue Light” (not to be confused with Kmart’s “Blue Light Special”), Goulet played David March, an American espionage agent. He posed as a foreign correspondent who had officially renounced his American citizenship. But he secretly belonged to an elite secret group called “Code Blue Light,” whose purpose was to infiltrate the Nazi high command. (Time magazine said “Robert Goulet has turned in his operetta cloak for a dagger.”)

Alas, “Blue Light” aired against “The Beverly Hillbillies.” one of the most popular shows of its era. It never attracted an audience and was gone by the fall.

If it’s Halloween, then it must be time for Zacherle to resurface.

And yep, the calendar doesn't lie. Cool Ghoul John Zacherle, now 89, the legendary host of NY TV’s horror/comedyfest “Chiller Theatre” way back in the day (before moving into a successful radio career at the original WNEW-FM and elsewhere), still walks among us.

Zach will be heard doing his thing Halloween night on the new-and-improved WCBS-FM/101.FM night between 8 and 10 p.m.

Now, if only some local TV brainiac would bring back “Chiller Theatre!”

Pardon me, but I’m about 30 years late on this one.

I have discovered a great TV drama: “The White Shadow.”

The back story: I was bored watching Game One of the World Series last night so I wanted to see what other sports might be on. I clicked to YES and what I found there wasn’t sports per se, but a rerun of the drama about a white ex-NBA player who now coaches at a predominantly minority L.A. high school.

I never watched it back in 1978 and ‘79. But, bored, I stuck around and found myself riveted for the entire hour.

This episode featured Peter Horton, a decade before “thirtysomething,” as a wealthy kid whose father transfers him from a ritzy high school to the inner-city Carver High because — there are rumors the boy might be gay. (Of course, the word used throughout the show isn’t gay, but “homosexual.”) And of course, the rumors dog the boy at his new school.

Per that time, the issue gets tiptoed around but enough for Ken Howard’s Coach Ken Reeves to smell something akin to McCarthyism (guilty until proven innocent). The teenaged Horton puts on a compelling performance.

It was all so earnest — and Afros, sideburns and bad fashion aside — it made for great viewing.

Much more compelling than the BoSox’ blowout.

I can’t wait for the next episode.

Classic TV faves shuffle in the TV Land schedule starting Monday, Oct. 15.

Joining the early morning lineup weekdays: “Night Court” (7 a.m.) and “Wings” (7:30 a.m.). Both sitcoms restart Monday from their premiere episodes. (“Star Trek” is starting over at 6 a.m., too.)

Added later in the morning: “Designing Women” (10:30 a.m.) and “The Brady Bunch” (11 a.m.). “Green Acres” moves to 1:30 p.m.

In prime time starting Monday, “M*A*S*H” airs at 8 and 8:30 weekdays, leading into nightly two-hour blocks (“Designing Women” Monday, “Andy Griffith” Tuesday, “Sanford and Son” Wednesday, “Good Times” Thursday, another “M*A*S*H” hour 9-10 p.m. Friday).

Check out the changes at TV Land’s just relaunched (and much crisper looking) web site, packed with show clips, interviews, episode guides, interactive goodies and more.

Feeling nostalgic these days for the New York City of 1977, are you?

If ESPN’s “The Bronx Is Burning” isn’t enough to bring you back to those halcyon days of serial killers, looting mobs and midget mayors, then VH1’s excellent ” “NY '77: The Coolest Year in Hell” (Saturday at 9 p.m.) is sure to satisfy your jones big time.

The VH1 doc crew has done its homework here. It's hard to believe the same channel that asks us to take Flavor Flav and Scott Baio seriously could produce such an insightful and fascinating film.

You want Son of Sam? You got him, along with the July blackout, The Koch-Cuomo-Beame-Abzug mayoral smackdown. Studio 54, Plato’s Retreat, the birth of hip-hop, CBGB.

Dig this commercial for Plato's Retreat, the Upper West Side swingers club (no, that's not where people like A-Rod and Barry Bonds hang). Don't worry, it's PG-rated.

And while you're being moved by the Spirit of '77, check out the Ramones rockin' the Bowery.

For more good, clean fun, head uptown to Studio 54, the disco where fascistic doormen ushered the high and mighty into its innards. Schlubs like you and me need not apply.

The two-hour doc is filled with commentary by such luminaries as Geraldo Rivera, Gloria Gaynor, pioneering deejay Jellybean Benitez, Richard Hell, Ed Koch (he utters the F-word!) and Jimmy Breslin (he says Times Square was better when it was full of whores instead of suburbanites going to see “The Lion King.”)

"NY ' 77" was co-written by Jonathan Mahler, author of “Ladies and Gentlemen, the Bronx is Burning,” the book on which the ESPN miniseries is based. But thankfully, there’s nothing about Reggie, Billy and the Yankees here. But there’s also nothing about the Midnight Massacre in which the Mets dumped Tom Seaver on the Reds for a bag of golf balls on June 15.

That's what I remember being most obsessed with during the summer of '77, not whether I could get into Studio 54, from which I most assuredly would be barred.

Those folks at WLIW/21 have unearthed a goodie Saturday night at 7.

They call it “Johnny Cash: A Man and His Vision,” but it’s really just a compilation of clips from Cash’s 1969-71 ABC show featuring one heckuva bunch of guest singers.

Like: Bob Dylan (I Thew It All Away), Neils Young (The Damage Done) and Diamond (Cracklin' Rosie), James Taylor (Sweet Baby James), Joni Mitchell (Long Black Veil), Creedence Clearwater Revival (Bad Moon Rising) and Derek and the Dominoes (It's Too Late). Let's not forget Cash's old Sun Records cronies, Carl Perkins (Blue Suede Shoes), Roy Orbison (Crying) and Jerry Lee Lewis (Whole Lotta Shakin' Goin' On).

Check out this amazing clip of Ray Charles performing Cash’s “Ring of Fire.” You’ll never think of that song in the same way again.

Definitely worth watching.

Got a hankering to see Johnny Carson? Sing the “Mister Ed” theme song? Or savor the 1960s toy Swing Wing commercial?

Then visit the Classic Television Blog, celebrating “Television the Way You Remember It.” There you’ll find a look back at the week in TV history. (This week: Lucille Ball and Garrison Keillor are born, Richard Burton dies, and filming begins on “West Side Story.”) Also, clips and recollections of classic TV moments. And some random riffs on the tube (whatever happened to slapstick?).

The blog is sponsored by R2 Entertainment, the folks behind DVD sets of Johnny Carson, Sonny & Cher, and many other vintage treats. But selling seldom gets in the way of the nostalgic fun.

You know what I really miss -- and they ain't coming back -- are summer replacement shows.

These were shows that literally took the place of an established program while it took off the summer. A quaint TV institution that has vanished in favor of an avalanche of cheap and increasingly dumber reality shows. I'm not bitter, right?

Because I don't wan't to watch "American Inventor," starting today, Boomer Tube will take a look back at some of the most memorable summer replacement shows.

Lets set the wayback machine for the summer of 1968 and tune into “The Summer Brothers Smothers Show.”

That groovy title was no doubt thought up by some sideburned, Nehru-jacketed exec at CBS for the Glenn Campbell show that took the place of the variety-comedy hour hosted by the Bad Boys of CBS Tom and Dick Smothers.

To keep the connection going between the two shows, “Smothers” regular deadpan comic Pat Paulsen appeared here each Sunday night — and why not? He was, famously, running for President. He lost, btw, to Richard Nixon.

Also on the show, “Smothers” head writer Mason Williams debuted his instrumental hit “Classical Gas,” which he touts here as the first-ever music video.

Campbell was so successful that he got his own CBS show a few seasons later. Check out this clip from "The Glen Campbell Goodtime Hour" in which Glen grooves with Stevie Wonder.

WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE SUMMER REPLACEMENT SHOW? POST A COMMENT HERE

For some folks, the Fourth of July holiday means barbecuing, shooting off firecrackers and a day off from work.

For me, two out of three ain't bad. I don't eat meat and I'm scared of firecrackers. (At least I'll be off from work.)

But what I really look forward to about the Fourth -- besides celebrating the 31st anniversary of the Bicentennial -- is the semiannual "Twilight Zone" marathon the folks at Sci Fi channel graciously provide.

This year, they're really going all out. It kicked things off at 8 a.m. on Tuesday and goes through 4 a.m. on Thursday morning.

That's a lot of Rod Serling -- and I, or rather my VCR, will be loving every minute of it.

Here is the Wednesday schedule.

And if you're looking for a one-stop "Twilight Zone" site, check out Sci-Fi's very own.

WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE 'TWILIGHT ZONE' EPISODE? POST A COMMENT HERE.

Seeing Paul and Ringo on Larry King the other night got me to thinking about the many times I’ve seen the Beatles on TV.

You know the drill: Their first appearance on "Ed Sullivan" in 1964, singing "Hey Jude" on the Smothers Brothers in 1968, the worldwide hookup for "All You Need Is Love" in '67 and so on.

There was one piece of Beatle TV-mania that's been missing, from my overstuffed mind, anyway -- something I havent seen in decades.

I'm talking about "The Beatles" cartoon series.

These were the crudely drawn adventures of the Fab 4 which ran Saturday mornings on ABC from 1965 to 1969. Two Beatles songs were usually performed on each episode. The boys were voiced by Paul Frees, a voiceover wiz perhaps best known for Cold War creep Boris Badenov on "Rocky & Bullwinkle" (John and George) and by Lance Percival (Paul and Ringo).

Everything you ever wanted to know about the show can be found here.

Thanks to the miracle of You tube (natch), I was able to watch a bunch of 'em for the first time since the beginning of the Nixon administration.

For starters, check out this episode in which they sing "I'll Follow the Sun":

:

Or this one, which was actually the final episode:

You know what? they’re still pretty tacky, but they are the Beatles, after all.

DO YOU REMEMBER "THE BEATLES" CARTOONS? POST A COMMENT HERE.

Larry King’s guests last night were a lot more of interest to me than the bimbo grilling that’s scheduled for tonight.

As you may know, the two surviving Beatles, Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr (along with the widows of John Lennon and George Harrison) sat down with LK to hype the first anniversary of the Las Vegas’ Fab 4 show, “Love.”

To see a clip from the interview, go here.

Here are some of the highlights:
McCartney and Starr on the influence of The Beatles’ music:
KING: Come on, you changed the world.
MCCARTNEY: We were just kids from Liverpool.
KING: Yes.
MCCARTNEY: And, yes, it is quite amazing, because as time goes on, it kind of becomes more and more of a phenomenon.
KING: It grows.
MCCARTNEY: And the young kids, you know, talk about it like as if it's history, which it is.
STARR: I think the most exciting thing is that, you know, we expect people our age to know the music. But, actually, a lot of the kids know the music. And if anything is left, we have left really good music. And that's the important part, not the mop tops or whatever, you know?

McCartney on the passing of George Harrison:
MCCARTNEY: Yes. We -- we all knew and he knew. But it was great. You know, in all these -- well, in, actually, in John's case -- I was going to say in all these tragedies. In George's case, in that tragedy, there were some good things about it. In John's case there weren't.
But with George, I got to see him...
KING: Oh, you did?
MCCARTNEY: ... A short time before he died. And it was just the best because we just -- we sat like this, if you don't mind. We sat and just stroking hands like this. And this is a guy, you know, I'd known since he was a little kid. And you don't stroke hands with guys like that. You know, it was just beautiful. And we just...
STARR: Not unless you're secure.
MCCARTNEY: We just spent a couple of hours and it was really lovely. It was like a favorite memory of mine.

Paul also deftly parried Larry’s “toughest” question of the night, an inquiry about “how are you doing” — obviously, a veiled reference to Paul and Heather’s unamicable split. “I’m doing surprisingly well,” said Sir Paul. “But I don’t talk about it, and that helps.”

Saw this commercial the other night for the Kia Spectra that brought me way back.

It wasn’t so much the spot’s plot: just a bunch of drivers play “musical cars” in a parking lot, jockeying for one open space. Ho-hum.
It was the music used as background.

After you’ve clicked on the above link, any boomer who grew up in the NY Metro area should instantly recognize that snippet: It's the theme song that Officer Joe Bolton used for his daily “Three Stooges Funhouse” show back in the day on Ch. 11 -- when WPIX was WPIX and not the CW/11.

BTW, the song was called “A Whistler and His Dog.” And it was written in 1905 by Arthur Pryor, a trombonist for John Philip Sousa.

I've waited 45 years to learn that piece of useless information. Gotta give a big shoutout to Kia for sparking my curiosity.

And Officer Joe, we still miss you!

Do you remember Officer Joe? Share your thoughts here.

It’s getting more and more difficult to find real old-time TV shows on TV anymore.

Nick at Nite long ago abandoned its boomer-centric menu (“Mr. Ed,” “Car 54,” etal). TV Land, despite claiming to be the home for baby boomers, showed its true colors last month by proudly trumpeting its acquistion of “Extreme Makeover: Home Edition.” reruns. The American Life Network has a terrific lineup (“I Spy,” “Combat,” “UNCLE”) but that channel is rarely available.

So what’s a frustrated boomer to do?

Head to the web. Natch.

As this article points out, the web has become a treasure trove of vintage programs, thanks largely to one old-time TV collecting fanatic named Ira Gallen who has put many of his clips on youtube.com

So now you can invest hours of your valuable time, clicking on clips from the days when Maypo was considered a health food.

I’ll be writing more about these shows individually, but to get you started. dig this clip from “Andy’s Gang,” a show that has special meaning to me, needless to say.

Magic twanger, indeed!

TV for those who remember the ‘50s, ‘60s and ‘70s — and those who wish they could

If you haven’t seen the 1969 film “Monterey Pop” in awhile (or have never seen it), check out “Monterey 40,” (Saturday at 9 p.m. on VH1 and VH1 Classic), a new “Rock Docs” film chronicling the 40th anniversary of that landmark rock festival. The doc captures the event in all in its counter-culture grooviness.

Unlike Woodstock (two summers later), the June 1967 Monterey Pop festival — which featured bands from San Francisco (Jefferson Airplane, Big Brother & The Holding Company), Los Angeles (The Byrds, Mamas & Papas), England (The Who, The Jimi Hendrix Experience) and elsewhere (Simon & Garfunkel, Ravi Shankar, Otis Redding and Hugh Masekela) — was not the focus of major media attention.

It may have been big news on the West Coast, but I recall seeing no coverage of it any New York-area newspapers at the time nor was it even acknowledged at on WOR-FM, New York’s pioneering FM rock station.

There are too many incredible performances to list here, but check out this one by Janis Joplin and her band Big Brother & the Holding Company.

Warm up for “Monterey 40” with “Hippies” (Friday at 8 p.m., History Channel), a documentary about the folks we once called “flower children.” And if you really can’t get enough, there’s also “American Experience’s” “Summer of Love” rerun late Sunday/early Monday at midnight.

MOVIES
M*A*S*H (Friday, 8 and 11:30 p.m., FMC) — The dark 1970 comedy from Larry Gelbart that inspired the hit TV series. Elliott Gould, Donald Sutherland and Sally Kellerman. Watch an interview with director Robert Altman here.

Reefer Madness (Midnight, late Friday/early Saturday, IFC) — Not made in the ‘60s, but this 1936 movie sure found a willing audience among counterculturalists who hooted at its over-the-top anti-pot message. Don't freak out when you see this.

All the President’s Men (Saturday at 10 p.m., WNET/13) -- Robert Redford and Dustin Hoffman “follow the money” and help bring down the Nixon administration. It’s followed at 12:20 a.m. by “Watergate Plus 30: Shadow of History,” with interviews with many key Watergate figures including Redford and Hoffman, I mean Woodward and Bernstein. At this point in time, you may click on the trailer to the 1976 film here.

The Exorcist (late Saturday/early Sunday, 1 a.m., FUSE) — Hey, any chance to see Linda Blair’s head spin again is cool, but what the hell is this movie doing on this music-video channel?

AND CHECK THIS OUT:
Sam Cooke: Legend (Saturday at Noon, WLIW/21) — No-warts portrait of the smooth-voiced singer of “You Send Me,” “Cupid” and many other hits. Sam performs "Blowin' in the Wind" in this rare clip from "Shindig" in 1964, a few months before his death.

And then there’s Maude. Wow, was there “Maude.” Producer Norman Lear announced his first “All in the Family” spinoff in a big way back in 1972. Star Beatrice Arthur’s mouthy suburban liberal counterpoint to Queens conservative Archie Bunker had barely hit CBS that fall when, just nine episodes into her run, she debated having an abortion.

It was a sitcom, remember. But it was the ’70s, and “All in the Family” had blown topical humor wide open with its boisterous debates on the Vietnam War, feminism, racism and so many other –isms, it was hard to keep count. This was a tough one, though. Archie and radical son-in-law Mike might debate the war, but they weren’t actually fighting it. Affluent Westchester housewife Maude Findlay, at age 47, was considering an abortion a year before the Supreme Court’s landmark Roe v. Wade decision, when the procedure was legal in only a few states like New York.

What’s surprising looking back at the two-part episode “Maude’s Dilemma,” part of the series’ first season just arriving on DVD (out Tuesday from Sony, list price $30), is how funny it aims to be. Lots of the humor is broad, with wild double-takes and double-entendres as friends and family react to Maude’s big news. Lear’s brassy, videotaped sitcoms were more theatrical than we’re used to today. There’s also frequent speechifying by the characters, blatantly advocating a position or imparting information, something else Lear’s audience was expecting.

That advocacy is the central focus of the storyline. It’s hardly a nuanced look at the issue. But we forget now that abortion then hadn’t yet become such a political lightning rod, with positions on both sides of the issue polarized by activists to motivate their supporters. Much thinking was that it was a personal matter, and that’s the way “Maude” eventually treats the tale.

“The rabbit died -- laughing, no doubt,” star Arthur deadpans upon telling Maude’s middle-aged friend her pregnancy has been confirmed. With a husband, a divorced adult daughter and an 8-year-old grandson living in the house, she moans, “An uncle is about to inherit his nephew’s potty seat.” Daughter Carol suggests “one sensible way out of this -- you don’t have to have the baby . . . When you were young, abortion was a dirty word. It’s not anymore.”

Maude does allow at one point that “part of me feels guilty for even thinking about it.” But that’s a passing doubt. Moral qualms aren’t the issue. Making the “right” decision for their family is. Husband Walter wants Maude to do what she wants, she wants to do what he wants, and there’s sitcom failure-to-communicate throughout the two-parter’s second half. Finally deciding “we’d make awful parents” at such an advanced age -- yes, it was a different era -- Maude decides not to have the baby, and Walter assures her, “In the privacy of our own lives, you’re doing the right thing.”

Contrast that with the recent no-privacy-allowed abortion debate on ABC’s “General Hospital.” The daytime drama bent over backward, forward and sideways when teen character Lulu found out she was pregnant. The scripts took pains to repeat that she and her partner had used a condom, which was defective (and manufactured by his family’s company, to boot). Her boyfriend, her friends, her brother, her relatives, his relatives -- everybody had their say, for days on end. Lulu agonized over what to do, at length, both before she did decide to have an abortion and long afterward, too.

It’s not that this isn’t a difficult topic on a personal level. But just as “Maude” gave speeches, “General Hospital” presented position papers offering equal time a bit too blatantly -- especially for a genre in which everybody gets pregnant all the time and abortion is rarely even mentioned. No matter which era visits this topic, characters get converted into mouthpieces for espousing viewpoints that threaten to overshadow the humanity we connected with in the first place. Some things never change.

Now this is a network that really has no clue what it’s doing.

It schedules an Angels in Hawaii week of “Charlie’s Angels” and doesn’t tell anybody!

The rerun-laden ION network -- originally PAX, then last fall renamed i, until last week when it changed its name again -- finally managed to send TV critics a press release touting its February highlights on Feb. 6. Which means we’d already missed Monday’s “Island Angels” hour and blew right past last night’s “Waikiki Angels,” too.

At least it’s not too late for Jaclyn, Cheryl and Tanya in Season 5’s “Hula Angels” tonight at 10 (Feb. 7 on WPXN/31). Better yet: Jaclyn, Kate and Cheryl in that immortal Season 2 two-parter “Angels in Paradise” (Thurs-Fri at 10), where Charlie is kidnapped and Jill/Farrah’s little sister Kris/Cheryl is introduced. Island crooner Don Ho is also on hand. You might consume a few tiny bubbles yourself to make your retro viewing that much merrier.

I couldn't believe it when I just saw the new Dell commercial..

The spot uses one of the coolest songs in the universe, a shot of fuzzttone wackiness straight out of 1966. And while I don't give a byte about what they're actually pushing I applaud whomever their Madison Avenue brainiacs might be for unearthing this classic.

For they are using "You're Gonna Miss Me" by the 13th Floor Elevators, one of the five greatest garage bands of all time. (The others are the Standells, the Chocolate Watch Band, Long Island's own Vagrants, and the Seeds). The song, one of the highlights of the legendary Nuggets collection, perfectly captures the tentative first co-minglings of punk and psychedelia. (sheesh, I sound like a damn rock critic here).

What it has to do with computers beats the heck out of me. On the other hand, the Elevators were from Texas and Dell is headquartered in Texas. Maybe there's some kind of Lone Star nudge-nudge wink-wink going on.

If this commercial made me refrain from hitting the clicker, I can only imagine the reaction of Roky Erikson, the Elevators' over-the-top lead singer, wherever he may be.

Do you have any favorite garage-band songs from the '60s that you think would sound great in a commercial.?Talk
back to the Boomer Tube here.

WEDNESDAY, NOV. 22, 2006

HERE'S ANOTHER CLASSIC '60s TV ROCK 'N' ROLL MEMORY....Since it got awfully lonely on "Gilligan's Island," the writers often had to think of inventive ways of dropping in "special guests" onto the island (Phil Silvers, Don Rickles, among others) to interact with the castaways and then get the hell back to civilization.

On this 1964 episode, the show's brain trust dragooned a semi-obscure faux-British band called the Wellingtons. These were the guys who sang the theme song on the show's first season, btw. (hey, I remember seeing them on "Shindig!") and pretend that they were a Fab Four-wannabee band called the Mosquitoes.
(Those grown-ups really must've thought they were brilliant with their insect analogies.)

Anyway, the Mosquitoes ended up on the island because they needed a place to avoid their rabid fans. Here. they serenaded Gilligan and Co.

A brilliant idea, no? How come Mark Burnett hasn't airlifted The Killers or Arctic Monkeys onto "Survivor" yet? Just asking.

TONIGHT'S PICK
Check out tonight's Andy Griffith Show (9 p.m., TV Land). Elinor Donahue -- yes Princess from "Father Knows Best" -- guests as a new pharmacist who comes to Mayberry. And in that vein, "Biography" (8 p.m., Biography Channel) profiles Don Knotts aka Barney Fife (or Ralph Furley if you're in that younger demo.)

WEDNESDAY, NOV. 15

Remember “The Mothers In-Law?”

It was a short-lived comedy (1967-69) about two sets of very different neighbors (Eve Arden and Herbert Rudley; Kaye Ballard and Roger C. Carmel) whose kids married each other. Great premise, but it’s not particularly well-remembered today. Although it should be.

One particularly groovy moment occurred when the proto-punk band The Seeds ( nudge-nudge wink-wink drug reference alert) performed their one and only hit, “Pushin’ too Hard” (a genuine punk classic!) on the show. You know it was one of those decisions by the show’s producers (who included Desi Arnaz) to get the “kids” will tune in. The episode originally aired on April 28, 1968 and is entitled, "How Not To Manage A Rock Group"

As you can see, it is priceless.

THIS JUST IN AND IT'S BIG:
Brady Bunch" star Barry Williams will play Mr. Howell and Dawn Wells will star as Mrs. Howell in the latest incarnation of the "Gilligan" musical.

Book me on the next plane to Florida

TUESDAY, NOV. 14

Rewinding the ‘50s, ‘60s and ‘70s on your TV

Tonight’s Pick:
EASY COME, EASY GO (ACMAX, 3:20 a.m. Wednesday, Cablevision Ch. 371)

Poor Elvis. It’s 1967 and he’s 32 years old, the youth of America are entranced by hippies and the nascent counter-culture.

Yet here he is still churning out movies, like this one, his 23rd, in which he plays a Navy frogman diving for buried treasure. And singing classics like “Yoga Is As Yoga Does” (check out “Bride of Frankenstein’s” Elsa Lanchester as the Yoga instructor).

Besides that, you might notice if you care, that the cast includes The Munsters’ Pat Priest (the second Marilyn Munster) as the bad chick and Pat “Mr. Schneider” Harrington Jr. as the frogman’s former partner.

Anyway, an Elvis Presley movie, any Elvis Presley movie is beyond criticism. It just is. Enjoy.

MONDAY, NOV. 6

Vintage fare for those who care

HEY THERE: A SAMMY DAVIS JR. SIGHTING!

Sammy Davis Jr. made one of the classic guest appearances in a 1972 episode of “All in the Family” in which he dropped in on Archie Bunker to retrieve a briefcase he had left in Archie’s cab.
Five years later, he played himself on a memorable “Charlie’s Angels” episode in which the girls become his bodyguards after several attempts to kidnap him. You can see it tonight at 9 on WPXN, which is Ch. 31 over-the-air, but airs as Ch. 3 on Cablevision.

THE QUESTION: Can you name three other series on which Sammy guested during the 1970s? Look for the answer here tomorrow.

ALSO OF NOTE

THE TWILIGHT ZONE (1 a.m. Tuesday morning on Sci Fi). One of the classics, “A Game of Pool.” A pre-Oscar, pre-Quincy Jack Klugman’s a pool shark who finds himself in the game of his life against his long-dead rival (Jonathan Winters).

THE LAST WALTZ. (11 p.m., VH1 Classic) — Martin Scorsese’s memorable filming of the Band’s 1976 farewell concert at San Francisco’s Winterland. It really was a swan song to the ‘60s (but you knew that), with performances by Joni Mitchell, Bob Dylan, Neil Young, Van Morrison, Eric Clapton and Muddy Waters.

FRIDAY, NOV 3

TV for the TV Generation

TONIGHT’S PICK: AIRPLANE! (10 p.m., TV Land)

Still brilliantly funny after 26 years. It relaunched the careers of Robert Stack and Leslie Nielsen (whose “Airplane!”-inspired series “Police Squad!” comes out on DVD Tuesday) And who can ever forget Barbara Billingsley’s turning her June Cleaver legacy upside down with her jive-talk dialogue.

And speaking of the Cleavers...
LEAVE IT TO BEAVER (5:30 a.m., Saturday, TV Land) has an amusing episode (but weren’t they all?: Wally decides to grow a moustache to impress a girl.

ALSO OF NOTE:
BIOGRAPHY (8 p.m., Biography Channel) profiles singer Brenda Lee, who straddled the worlds of rock and country. I’m guessing that by Thanksgiving weekend we’ll be hearing Little Miss Dynamite’s “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree” for the first of at least 10,000 times until Dec. 25.

DANIEL BOONE: FRONTIER TRAIL RIDER (8 p.m., Encore Westerns) — Even I didn’t know that a 1968 feature film was released based on Fess Parker’s TV series. And why should I? This clipjob apparently was put together for distribution outside the U.S. market. But here it is — in which Dan’l encounters Indians while leading a wagon train to the Kentucky valley, resulting in a servant's injury.

THURSDAY, NOV.. 2

Tonight’s TV must-see is: DEAN MARTIN :GREATEST HITS (9 p.m., WNET/13) —

OK, I know when we were younger the idea that PBS would air a Dean Martin special was ludicrous. But this isn’t your parents’ PBS anymore. This show is a compilation of songs from two TV specials by the hippest dude to ever come straight outta Steubenville. We haven’t seen the show, but we're pretty confident he's gonna sing “That’s Amore” and “Everybody Loves Somebody.”

BTW, expect to see a lot more of Dino in ‘07: the late singer’s trust made a deal last week to market his name, image and likeness. Can’t wait to buy that shot glass engarved with the Rat Packer’s mug. Anybody have any thoughts about what Dean Martin merchandise they’d want to own

ALSO OF NOTE

THE ANDY GRIFFITH SHOW (9 p.m., TV Land) — One of the show’s classic episodess, “Opie's First Love,” in which Opie's party date jilts him at the last moment.

AMERICAN MUSCLE CAR (9 p.m., Speed) — looks at the 1964 GTO, the car that started the Detroit muscle-car craze. And as you know, was one of the handful of cars to have a hit song recorded in its honor. Which reminds me: anybody out there know what ever happened to Ronny and the Daytonas?

Boomer Tube is one baby boomer’s musings on what’s on that’s of particular interest to those who think the TV and movies of the ‘50s, ‘60s and ‘70s is forever groovy.

I’m stewing today because I subscribe to Cablevision and I can’t get the American Life Network. Yeah, I realize nobody knows about this channel (which is available on satellite), but darn it, I wanna be able to see reruns of “Hawaiian Eye,” “My Favorite Martian,” “The Man from UNCLE,” “I Spy.” Yo, C’vision: you did a real solid when you added Turner Classic movies -- so how about it?

TONIGHT’S PICKS

THE LONG LONG TRAILER (8 p.m., TCM) — Lucille Bell and Desi Arnaz took a break from “I Love Lucy” to film this 1954 comedy in which they play newlyweds who splurge on a trailer for their honeymoon, which includes
Yosemite National Park.

CHARLIE’S ANGELS (9 p.m., WXPN/31, Ch. 3 on Cablevision) — Kelly poses as an unwed mother to find a girl planning to sell her unborn child to the black market. Don’t mess with Kelly.

AMERICAN MASTERS (9 p.m., WNET/13) — “Rod Serling: Submitted for Your Approval” — This doc definitely shows why “The Twilight Zone’s” creator was the coolest thing to come out of Binghamton, NY since the invention of the spiedie (if you have to ask, you’ve never tasted one).