Disclaimer: Nothing about E! belongs to me. I'm just playing. I promise to put everything away when I'm done. This story is borrowed from an idea I got while watching one of my favorite episodes of Seinfeld. Nothing about that show belongs to me either. I'm not making any money on this, so please don't sue me. You'd only get about $8.42 anyway (my apologies to Gloria Truelove…) Any medical mistakes are mine and mine alone.

“You know, I really appreciate the way you know when to reaffirm my faith in your basic insanity.” Roy Desoto

Opposite Johnny

By

Morningwolf

“C'mon…c'mon…” Johnny urged as if his encouragement would actually have an effect on the long line of backed up traffic. He was going to be late again. “Cap may as well assign me permanent latrine duty, and Dwyer…he's probably ready to kill me for all the times he's had to stay late.” He clicked on the radio, hoping for some explanation as to why the normally speedy traffic on the 405 was now moving at 5 mph. As he listened to Don Henley of the Eagles belting the chorus of “Get Over It,” he had an idea.

“I should invent a phone people could use in their cars! If I had something like that, I could call the station when I'm running late and Cap would at least know I had a good excuse. And, Roy wouldn't have to pace the floor wondering if I'm stuck in a ditch somewhere. Of course, we'd probably get a lot of calls for people involved in accidents because they were trying to dial and drive at the same time. Still…this is a great idea! There's a lot of money to be…Oh, John, just stop! What are you doing? You know darn well every time you get a really good idea, someone either steals it out from under you or you end up embarrassing yourself. Just forget it…it would never fly anyway! A car phone? What was I thinking?”

Johnny sighed as he drummed his hands on the steering wheel of the Rover and inched forward another few feet. It's amazing how easy it is to have an internal monologue when sitting by yourself in traffic. He started doing just that, and when someone as quirky and talkative as Johnny has an internal monologue, it can get a little interesting.

“Man, it would be nice if I could do something important with my life. I mean, being a paramedic is important, I guess, but I mean something really great! Leave a legacy, you know? I mean, geez! I'm gonna be 30 years old in a few years! What do I have to show for it? Roy has Joanne and two great kids! I can't get a date to save my life. I mean, I'm not ugly or anything am I? Then, when I do get a chick to go out with me, it never amounts to anything. And why are bad things always happening to me? Man, I must have the worst injury record in the department! And what about stuff like that time the credit card company screwed up my bill? Or the time I got audited? Then, there was the time I had to work three straight shifts to take care of that $8000 mutt. Stuff like this doesn't happen to the other guys. And why am I such an easy target for the Phantom's pranks? Am I really that gullible?”

By this time, Johnny had inched his car forward to the place where the accident had occurred…the accident that was causing the morning gridlock. It was in the far left lane and appeared minor, but with two lanes closed, and all of the inevitable rubber necking, traffic was crawling past. He saw the guys from C-shift at the scene, and it appeared everything was under control. Johnny leaned his head out the driver's side window and asked if they needed any help. With the assurance that all was being handled, he made his way past. “At least Dwyer didn't have to stay late for ME, and I should have plenty of time to get to work and get changed before the squad gets back from Rampart.” The traffic opened up almost immediately, and within minutes, Johnny was getting off at his exit and making fast time to the station. He looked at his watch and frowned. It was 8:23 .

The internal monologue continued on the way to the station. “John Gage, you've gotta make some serious changes, man. Your life is a joke…you need to get it together. Obviously, you need to start acting differently, make better decisions. Firemen rely heavily on their instincts. That's all well and good when you're working, and you really are a pretty good fireman, except for all the injuries that is. Maybe your instincts have been wrong. Yeah…that's it! If you want to change your life, you have to reexamine every instinct you have! You need to do the OPPOSITE of whatever your instinct tells you to do, and things will have to change for the better!”

Having finally reached the station, Johnny sprinted for the door. He tried to blow past the rest of the A-shift crew who were gathered at the table, but Cap stopped him before he could head to the dorm to change. “John…are you aware it's…” he glanced at his watch, “ 8:33 ?”

Johnny's instinct was to defend his tardiness by explaining everything that happened that morning from the time his alarm went off until now, but then he remembered his new idea. “Yes, sir.”

Cap was a little taken aback at John's lack of a defense. He secretly had to admit to himself, he often got a chuckle out of the long, drawn out, stammering excuses. Besides, John did always have a good reason for being late. If there was trouble to be found, he'd find it. “I take it you were caught up in that accident traffic on the 405?”

“Yes, sir.”

Cap waited for the response he knew would follow. It didn't. “Go ahead and change clothes. By the way, you're on latrine duty today.”

“Yes, sir.” Johnny made for his locker. He didn't see the stunned expressions on the faces of his shift mates.

“What's with Johnny?” Marco asked no one in particular.

“Yeah, Roy ,” Mike continued. “Maybe you should see if he's sick or something.”

Chet looked up from his book. He was studying for the engineer exam again. “Aw…he probably just got dumped again last night. That would make what? Four times in the past three weeks?”

Cap clapped his hands together and rose from his chair. “Gentlemen…I think we have work to do, don't we?”

A chorus of “yeahs,” and “right, Caps” rang through the day room as the guys carried their coffee cups over to the sink.

Cap headed to his office to attack the never ending mound of paperwork he knew was waiting for him while Roy made his way to the locker room to see what was going on with his partner. He and Cap shared a similar thought. “It's going to be a long shift.”

Roy approached the locker area with caution. He had learned through past experience that when Johnny was in a mood, he needed to step carefully. “Good morning.”

“Good morning.” Johnny was busy attaching his badge and paramedic pin to his uniform shirt, which hung on a hanger outside his locker.

“How were your days off?”

“Fine…just fine.”

“Uh huh. Everything OK?”

“Yeah. Why wouldn't it be?”

Roy quickly realized that Johnny wasn't in the mood to discuss whatever was on his mind. Sometimes his partner was harder to read than a doctor's handwriting. “It's just that, well, you seem kind of quiet this morning.”

“What do you mean, ‘quiet'?”

“Well, for one thing, you normally are a bit more descriptive in your explanations to Cap about why you're running late.”

“ Roy , there was nothing to explain. Besides, I've decided to make some changes.”

“Changes?” Roy said hesitantly. He really didn't think he wanted to go there right now. Usually when Johnny got a new idea in his head, it wasn't good news for anyone.

“Changes. Roy , I'll be honest with you. I had a lot of time to think when I was sitting in traffic this morning…”

Oh no . The result of Johnny having a lot of time to think couldn't possibly be a good thing.

Johnny was now fully dressed and stood with one hand on his hip and the opposite foot resting on top of the bench. “I mean, I really had a chance to examine my life, you know? I finally figured it out, Roy .”

Roy really wasn't sure he wanted to know what “it” was, but it was too late. He was committed. There was nothing left to do but see it through. “Figured what out?”

“Well, you know how I keep getting into bad situations like the time my credit card bill was messed up, and the time I got audited?”

“Johnny, I wouldn't necessarily call those ‘bad situations.' I'd call them…”

“And, well, there's no secret that my injury record with the department is a mile long…”

“Maybe, but we have a dangerous job…”

“I know that, Roy . But, no one gets hurt as often as I do. Then there's the way I'm always striking out with women…”

“Johnny, what are you trying to say?”

Johnny sat down on the bench. “ Roy , it's obvious that the reason all these things keep happening is because my instincts are wrong.”

“How can your instincts be wrong?”

“You see, Roy , it's simple. A normal person's instinct would be to get away from a building that's on fire, right?”

“Yeah…”

“Don't you see? We go against natural instinct every time we run into a burning building or any other dangerous situation. I mean, I'm a pretty good fireman, wouldn't you say?”

“Johnny, you're a good fireman AND paramedic, but I really don't see…”

“That's because when I'm working, I go AGAINST my natural instinct. It occurred to me that if I just go against my natural instinct on everything else, my life will be much better.”

“You're really amazing, you know that?”

“ Roy , I'm serious!”

“So, you're saying that you're going to start doing the opposite of your natural instinct, and you think that's going to somehow cause you to avoid every road bump life throws at you?”

“Not EVERY road bump. But, you have to admit…trouble does seem to follow me around.”

“Johnny, I'll admit that maybe you do have your share of bad luck, but I really think a lot of it is just coincidence or it's brought on by your nature.”

“Exactly, Roy ! So you agree with me.”

“I agree that you sometimes get yourself into ‘situations.' That doesn't mean I think you should go against your natural instinct. Don't you think that could be dangerous in a fire?”

“ Roy , have you been paying attention to anything I said? In a fire, I'm already going against my natural instinct. That won't change.”

Roy decided he needed to end this conversation and quick. His brain was beginning to hurt. “You wanna know what I think?”

“Sure.”

“I think you're completely out of your mind.” With that, Roy headed out to the day room for another cup of coffee.

“You'll see, Roy !” Johnny called after him. “I'm serious about this! This is going to work out great!”

This IS going to work out great, Johnny thought to himself as he raised his hand to give Smokey his ritualistic two taps for good luck. Wait a minute. Johnny stopped himself. I always give Smokey two taps for good luck. Nothing good ever comes out of my giving Smokey two taps for luck. Today, I'm going to do the opposite!”

Proud of his decision and with a new resolve, Johnny closed his locker and headed to the day room.

In the dayroom, Chet and Roy were sitting at the table drinking coffee. Mike was sitting on the couch petting Henry, and Marco was busy doing dishes. Cap mentioned he wanted everyone assembled for a meeting, so everyone was waiting for Cap to arrive.

“So, Roy , what's with Gage this morning?” Chet asked.

“It's a long story.”

“Yeah, well we have time, amigo,” Marco said, turning to look at the others while drying a coffee mug.

“I have a feeling you'll all find out soon enough,” Roy assured them, taking another sip of coffee.

“Enough about Gage,” Chet chimed. “Let's talk about me.”

“What about you?” Mike offered.

“Well, my fine fireman friends...remember those Chet Kelly Human Fly Shoes that all of you poked so much fun at, huh?”

Marco was finished with the dishes and sat down at the table. “You mean those things with the suction cups on the bottom?”

“The ones that got stuck to ground?” Roy asked with a twinkle in his eye.

Snickering ensued from Chet's shiftmates, but he continued. “Yeah, yeah…go ahead and have a laugh at old Chet Kelly's expense, but you won't be laughing when you all find a pair of my human fly shoes as standard equipment in each of your inventories.”

The others exchanged glances around the room. “What are you talking about?” Mike wondered.

At that moment, Johnny entered the room, whistling an off tune melody. He walked over to the counter and grabbed a mug out of the cupboard. He picked up the coffee pot and went to pour himself a cup. Just before the aromatic elixir left the pot, he suddenly stopped. He put the pot back on the stove, and put his hand to his chin as if in deep thought.

Chet continued, “I got a letter from Kevlon Industries yesterday. You know…they manufacture all kinds of firefighter equipment? Anyway, they want to market my human fly shoes. They're going to help me get a patent!”

Johnny stood at the counter, not paying any attention to the conversation. He looked confused.

Roy noticed Johnny seemed to be arguing with the voices in his head. That would be the only explanation for why he wouldn't have jumped all over Chet's news with a snide remark. Roy stopped wondering about Johnny's apparent dilemma long enough to say, “You're kidding, right Chet?”

“ Roy , I'm hurt, pal! I told you all they were a great invention, but all you guys could do was laugh at me. Well, now I'M going to be the one laughing…all the way to the bank!”

Marco changed the subject, leaving everyone wondering if Chet was pulling their legs or if he was serious. “Speaking of laughing all the way to the bank, are we still on for poker Friday night?”

The members of A-Shift had started a new tradition recently. Once a week they all got together at Cap's house to play poker. Lately, Chet had been cleaning up.

“I don't know,” Mike called over from his perch on the couch. “I don't know if I can afford to lose anymore money.”

“Yeah, tell me about it, amigo…but, I'm hoping this week we can take back some of our hard earned cash from Mr. Maverick over here,” Marco called back, indicating Chet with a flick of his thumb and a roll of his eyes.

“You HAVE been lucky lately,” Roy stated as he got up and started walking over to his still befuddled partner. “Although…I can't complain too much I guess. I keep breaking even.”

“ Roy ,” Johnny asked, “What's the opposite of coffee?”

“You can't be serious.”

“Of course I'm serious!” Johnny was indignant. “What's the opposite of coffee?” Roy could almost SEE Johnny's BP rising.

The poker and human fly shoe discussion was now over. All attention focused on Johnny as Cap entered the room, clip board in hand, ready to go over some new department regulations.

“ Roy ?” Cap raised an eyebrow, having heard the strange outburst. “Are you sure he's OK?”

“I'm fine, Cap…but I need to know…what's the opposite of coffee?”

“Johnny,” Roy said softly, “maybe you should tell them about the little decision you made this morning.”

“I will, I will…but right now my instincts are telling me to drink a cup of coffee. Nothing good has ever come out of my drinking coffee. I want the exact opposite of coffee!”

The rest of the guys shot curious looks at Roy , but honestly they weren't too concerned about Johnny's strange rant. If it had been anyone else, they would have been worried about a concussion, mind altering drugs, or temporary insanity. They had all worked with Johnny long enough to know they should just play along, and whatever this newest obsession was, it would most likely be forgotten by their next shift.

Mike was the first to offer a suggestion. “Tea!”

“Tea!” Johnny looked relieved. “You're right! Tea would have to be the opposite of coffee, right? I mean, they always ask if you want ‘tea or coffee' just like salt or pepper…ketchup or mustard…Right! Tea! Where's the tea?” He started frantically looking through the cabinets.

“Uh, John.” Cap decided he would be the one to break the news to his junior paramedic that there was no tea in the station. “We don't have any tea. We've never had any tea.”

“Yeah, Gage! Tea is a sissy drink! Firemen always drink coffee!” Chet was already trying to figure out how to use Gage's latest preoccupation to the Phantom's advantage…as soon as he figured out exactly WHAT that latest preoccupation was.

Johnny turned around to face Chet. “I'll have you know, Chester , my people have been drinking tea for generations. It has a lot of health and medicinal benefits…”

“He's right,” Mike agreed.

“Well, it doesn't matter, because we're not going to have any tea around here, are we Cap?” Chet wouldn't be caught dead drinking anything but his favorite java.

“Kelly…if John wants to start drinking tea, I really don't see any harm in it. He could probably do with a little less caffeine anyway. It has a tendency to cause…excitability.”

“Oh, very funny.” Johnny made a mental note to stop and get some tea at that little shop on the way home that sells herbal products. He felt good about his decision, but then suddenly realized he still didn't know what to drink. “Well…I need to drink something, but there's no tea. What else could be the opposite of coffee?” Johnny mumbled the last sentence to himself as he opened the refrigerator and started rifling around.

“Johnny…” Roy started slowly, placing a hand on Johnny's shoulder. “Why don't you just have a cup of coffee?”

“No, Roy …I swear, sometimes I don't think you listen to me at all.”

“OK, well how about milk, then?”

Johnny pondered that for a minute. “No…no…won't work, Roy . You see, I drink milk all the time. It would have to be the opposite of milk…”

“What happened to ‘the opposite of coffee?'” Marco asked the others. They shrugged in unison.

“That's it, Roy !” Johnny was excited again. “CHOCOLATE milk!”

Roy really could not believe he was having this conversation. Where were the tones when you needed them? “Where are you going to get the chocolate?”

Johnny's face looked like a five year old child who had just found out there was no Santa Claus. “Oh, man! Guess I'll have to get some later.”

“There's always orange juice, John.” Cap really couldn't believe he was adding fuel to this fire, but he knew John wouldn't rest until he had a drink, and he knew that the sooner a suitable beverage was found, the sooner he could get on with his discussion.

Mike was the one to respond to Cap's suggestion. “Actually, Cap, orange juice wouldn't qualify as the opposite of coffee. You see, orange juice is acidic. So is coffee. Also, orange juice and coffee both contain antioxidants. No…I think orange juice and coffee just share too many of the same chemical qualities.”

The room fell silent as everyone stared at the normally quiet engineer.

“What?” Mike wondered as if he always spoke five sentences at a time.

“You're right, Mike, thanks! What to drink…what to drink…”

Cap had finally reached his limit. “John…do you think you could just pick something and sit down so we can get on with this?!”

“OK…OK…I guess I'll just have some water.” Johnny poured himself a glass of water from the faucet, reasoning that since you use water to make coffee, and since he hadn't put any coffee into the water, that it could safely qualify as the opposite of coffee. He sat down at the table looking very pleased with himself, took a sip of his drink, and let out a loud, “Ahhhhh.”

Cap glared at him briefly and then turned his eyes toward his notes. “Gentlemen…I have here some new department regulations to go over that will become effective next shift, so listen up…”

Suddenly, the klaxons sounded. Cap sighed. Leaving his clip board on the table, he ran to the podium. Johnny quickly gulped down the rest of his water, and set the glass in the sink before heading to the squad.

Station 51…unknown type rescue…2578 Clarendon…two five seven eight Clarendon…cross street Belleview…time out 9:14 .

“Station 51, KMG-365.”

The squad and the engine pulled up to a large A-frame house backed by a pine forest. There was a woman in the front yard waving her arms frantically. “He's in the back yard…come quick!”

Roy and Johnny started getting the equipment out of the squad while Cap asked, “What happened, ma'am?”

“It's my husband! Purrfuls, our cat, climbed up the tree out back! George…that's my husband…he climbed up to get him down! Purrfuls climbed back down the tree, but George is stuck! He can't get down! Hurry! I'll take you to him!” The woman ran towards the back yard. Roy and Johnny quickly followed.

Cap stood contemplating this scenario for a moment. “That's a new one,” he mused, then continued. “Chet, Marco…grab a ladder!” With that, he headed for the back yard.

When Johnny and Roy arrived in the back yard, Roy asked, “Which tree is it?”

“That one!” The woman pointed.

“That one?” Johnny parroted.

“Yes…THAT one! Please hurry!”

Roy and Johnny looked up at the tree. It was an immense pine tree that must have been a hundred feet tall. Squinting their eyes against the morning sun, they found George…nearly at the top, clinging to a branch for dear life.

When Cap, Chet, and Marco saw the tree, they immediately knew their ladder was not going to be long enough. Johnny was already heading back to the squad for a couple of safety belts and ropes. After all, instinct would indicate he should stay safely on the ground.

Cap shot a glance at Johnny, then at Roy . “Where's John going?”

“He went to get ropes and a couple of safety belts. He figured he'd climb the ladder, then climb the branches the rest of the way up.”

“Yeah…that'll work.”

Once the ladder was in place, Johnny stood for a minute peering up. He had a killer headache. He really didn't remember it coming on, but it was definitely there now, with bells on. Deciding it was from staring at the sun, he began to ascend the ladder. After he reached the top of the ladder, he started scaling the tree limbs. About halfway to his goal, he stopped. He felt dizzy, and his head was pounding. Oh, man…not now! He closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose, an action that was not lost on Roy or Cap. “Hey, Johnny,” Roy called. “Are you OK?”

Johnny didn't feel OK. He couldn't figure out where this headache came from. He rarely got headaches, except of course when he had a concussion, ate too much smoke, or had contracted a rare monkey virus. He knew what those types of headaches felt like. This one wasn't any worse. In fact, it probably wasn't even as bad, but it was different. He felt a little uneasy, but he was torn. On the one hand, he had already decided that the reason he was a great rescue man was because he went against natural instinct. After all, most normal people don't go around climbing 100 foot trees. Of course there was George…but look what happened to him. On the other hand, maybe the reason he was so often injured on the job was because he ignored OTHER instincts. Reasoning this to be correct in a way that could only possibly make sense to Johnny, he knew what he needed to do. “ Roy ! I don't feel so good. I'm coming back down!”

Roy and Cap looked at each other in alarm. If Johnny was stopping in the middle of a rescue, there had to be something seriously wrong. “Johnny? Do you need me to come help you?” Roy called.

“No, Roy! I can climb down, but you're gonna have to go up and get George!”

“No problem, Junior! Just be careful!”

Johnny carefully made his way back down to earth. As soon as he reached the bottom, Roy asked him what was wrong.

“Man…I've got a killer headache.”

“When did it start?”

“I don't really remember. I didn't have one before we left the station.”

“Are you gonna be OK until I can get George down?”

“Yeah, Roy . Go ahead.” Johnny sat down in the shade of another tree. He closed his eyes, and leaned back against the trunk.

Roy reluctantly left his partner to begin his ascent up the ladder. Meanwhile, Cap walked over to where Johnny was resting. He knelt down beside his young charge and put a hand on his shoulder. “You OK, John?”

Johnny opened his eyes and looked at his captain. “I'm OK, Cap, but my head is really killing me. It feels like I have a headband on that's too tight.”

Cap was well aware of Johnny's tendency to downplay symptoms, especially when he was concerned about the welfare of a victim. The fact that he did not complete a rescue that he had committed to threw up warning flags by the dozen. Cap had a feeling that Johnny felt even worse than he was letting on. He also knew that no matter how bad Johnny felt, he often balked at the idea of getting checked out by one of the Rampart doctors. Cap had decided that Johnny needed to do just that. He readied himself for the inevitable argument. He would make it an order if he had to. “John, when Roy gets back down here, you're going to let him check you out. Then, you're headed to Rampart to be on the safe side, OK pal?”

Johnny didn't want Roy to check him out, and he definitely didn't want to go to Rampart. It was just a headache…a bad headache…a mysterious headache…but a headache nonetheless…nothing that a handful of aspirin wouldn't fix. He was just about to argue with Cap when he realized that his INSTINCT was to argue. He needed to do the opposite, so instead he simply agreed. “Yeah, Cap. Sure.”

Cap gave Johnny a pat on the shoulder and stood up to check on Roy 's progress with George. Wow…John must really feel bad. I've never seen him so willingly agree to a trip to Rampart. Looking up, Cap noticed Roy had reached George. After checking him out for injuries, and finding none, except to his pride, Roy attached the safety lines and within a few moments, both he and George were safely on the ground.

“Oh, George! Are you OK, sweetie?” George's wife practically knocked him over as she threw her arms around him. “Purrfuls! Purrfuls, you come back here! Purrfuls!” The cat ran through the yard in hot pursuit of a squirrel. George quickly chased after his wife and the chattering rodent. Chet and Marco hopped in on the proceedings, cutting around in the opposite direction, hoping to cut kitty off at the pass. Chet lunged for the cat and hit his mark, only to end up with a face full of Purrfuls who was clinging on for dear life. Chet ran through the yard, arms waving frantically, with a cat attached to his face. Finally, the woman caught up with him. “Purrfuls! Get off that man's face this instant!” Then, a little more sweetly, “Purrfuls, honey…come to mama.” She reached for the crazed animal and began stroking its back. Immediately the cat calmed and released his hold. “That's it Purrfuls, baby. It's OK…mama's got you now, little puddy wuddy.”

Chet walked away, shaking his head. Baby? Little puddy wuddy? That animal is a menace!

As soon as Roy 's feet hit the ground, Cap expressed his concern for Johnny. “ Roy , I think something's really wrong with John. He said he feels like he has a constricting band around his head, and he actually AGREED to a trip to Rampart.”

Roy quickened his pace. This was obviously serious! He grabbed the drug box and headed for his partner. His mind was already racing…did Johnny hit his head during the last shift? Could this be a delayed reaction to a head injury? Cap followed him with the biophone. Both knelt down beside Johnny who was still leaning against the tree, eyes closed, rubbing his forehead. Cap started setting up the biophone. “ Roy , do you want an ambulance?”

“Yeah, Cap. Maybe we better.”

As cap called in the Code I and requested the ambulance, Johnny opened his eyes, ready to protest. An ambulance? Now this was going too far! Opposite, John…opposite! Resigned to stay true to his conviction, he didn't argue.

Roy was becoming increasingly concerned. He started taking Johnny's vitals. “What's happening, Junior?”

“It's like I said, Roy . I have a really bad headache. It just came on all of a sudden. It feels like someone's got their hand on top of my head, and their fingers are squeezing my brain.”

“Anything else? Dizziness? Nausea?” Roy was checking Johnny's pupils.

“Ow, Roy ! I felt a little dizzy up in the tree. That's why I came down. I'm not dizzy anymore though.”

“Do you remember hitting your head recently?”

Johnny thought for a minute. “No.”

Roy picked up the biophone receiver. “Rampart, this is Squad 51…”

The disembodied voice of Dixie came over the line. “Go ahead, 51.”

“Rampart, we have a paramedic down. He's complaining of a severe headache…a constricting sensation…acute onset. He experienced some dizziness earlier, but it seems to have passed. His pupils are equal and reactive. He has no recollection of a recent head injury. Vital signs are: BP 120 over 80, pulse 72, and respirations 18.”

Dixie jotted down the information as she received it. Vital signs are normal. It has to be Johnny he's calling about. There's no way Johnny would stand for Roy calling in a simple headache to Rampart. Roy must have reason to believe this is something serious. “Stand by, 51”

Dixie quickly walked over to the lounge where she knew Joe Early was having a cup of coffee. She peeked her head in the door. “Joe…you better come take this.”

Joe took the note pad from Dixie and scanned it. “Vitals are normal. It sounds like a bad headache.”

“Joe, I would be inclined to believe that IF the patient weren't John Gage.”

Alarmed, Joe looked at Dixie . “ Roy called it in?” The pair headed for the base station.

“Uh huh.”

“I can't imagine Johnny letting Roy call in a headache unless he's really feeling bad. It makes me think Roy has real reason for concern.”

“That's exactly what I was thinking.”

Joe pressed down the button to communicate with Roy . “51, do you read?”

“10-4, Rampart.”

“Are there any other symptoms? Fever? Nausea? Blurred vision?”

“Negative, Rampart.”

“51, go ahead and transport. Continue monitoring vitals in transit and notify of any significant changes.”

“10-4, Rampart.”

Within minutes, Johnny was helped onto the awaiting stretcher. Chet, who was having his scratches tended to by Marco after his encounter with Purrfuls, refused a trip to Rampart. Roy and Cap decided that was OK. The scratches weren't deep, Purrfuls was up to date on his vaccines, and Chet was up to date on his tetanus booster. It was decided Marco would follow the ambulance in the squad. Soon, the paramedics were on their way to the hospital. Chet and Cap carried the ladder back to the engine.

Mike, who had been waiting for their return, and who had also witnessed Chet's misfortune couldn't resist making a comment when he saw the scratches on his friend's face. “What's the matter, Chet? Cat got your face?”

Cap repressed a snicker, and instead opted to give Chet a friendly slap on the back.

“Ha! Ha! Very funny, Mike.” Chet took his seat, followed by Cap, and the three made their way back to the station.

E!E!E!E!

As soon as the ambulance arrived at Rampart, Johnny was quickly whisked into treatment 3. Joe Early was waiting for his two favorite paramedics. He started to examine Johnny, asking him and Roy lots of questions, trying to get to the bottom of this sudden affliction. The thing that concerned him the most was that despite the fact that Johnny's vitals were perfectly normal and he only appeared to have a bad headache, he wasn't protesting being treated. He hadn't asked yet when he could leave and go back to work. This kind of sudden personality change was worrisome. Before long, and much to Johnny's dismay, Joe had ordered every conceivable test from a full skull series to an EEG. When everything came back normal, he decided he would consult with Kel Brackett.

“It's a mystery, Kel. Johnny presents with severe, acute onset head pain. It doesn't follow the pattern of a migraine. I've done a skull series, and I've run every test in the book. Everything comes back normal.”

“Hmmm. Could it be some sort of allergic reaction? Did he have anything unusual to eat today?”

“I asked him that. He couldn't think of anything.”

“Are you going to admit him?”

“That's just it, Kel. I really can't find any reason to. I'd chalk it up to just a severe headache, hand him some aspirin and send him back to work, except there's one thing that's really nagging me.”

“Oh?”

“He's just not acting like Johnny. He's not insisting that he's fine, and trying to hop off the table and head back to work. Roy said he didn't argue at all about coming in.”

“So…either he's pretty certain it's more than just a headache or…”

“Kel…there is another possibility.”

“Psychosomatic?” At Joe's head nod, he added, “Not Johnny. It just doesn't fit.”

“You're right, Kel. It doesn't.”

“So, what now?”

“I honestly don't know. Let's go talk to them again.”

Early and Brackett entered the treatment room. Johnny's headache was no better, and he was lying on the exam table, eyes closed. Roy was standing beside him.

“Hi, Roy ,” Brackett moved to Johnny's side. “Johnny?” he summoned quietly.

Johnny opened his eyes at the sound of Brackett's voice and turned to squint up at him. “Hey, Doc.”

“Does your head feel any better?”

“No, Doc. In fact I think it feels even worse. Can I get some aspirin or something?”

“In a minute, Johnny. I want you to think hard for a minute. Are you sure you haven't had anything unusual to eat or drink this morning or even last night. It may even be something you've had before like Chinese food or something with food coloring in it.”

“Sorry, Doc. I didn't even have anything to eat this morning. I had planned to stop at McDonalds on my way to work, but I got tied up in that accident traffic on the 405. Then, when I got to the station, I guess I just forgot about it.”

Roy suddenly had a “ Eureka ” moment. “Wait a minute…”

“ Roy ?” Joe had noticed the imaginary light bulb appear above Roy 's head.

“Can't caffeine withdrawal cause headaches?”

“Yes, it can Roy . It can cause very severe headaches, but with the amount of coffee I've seen Johnny put down, I think we can safely rule that out.”

“That's gotta be it!” Roy figured it out. “It's not what Johnny ate or drank. It's what he DIDN'T.”

Johnny looked at Roy incredulously. My head can't possibly be killing me this much just because I skipped my coffee, can it?

Roy continued, addressing the doctors. “Johnny suddenly got it into his head this morning that he was going to…” he hesitated, deciding not to try explaining the whole situation. Besides, he wasn't sure he even could. “Uh…he decided he was going to give up coffee.”

Joe looked at Johnny. “Is that right?”

Johnny nodded.

Now it was Brackett's turn. “Johnny, how many cups of coffee do you normally drink by this time of morning?”

Johnny looked at his watch, then appeared to be mentally calculating numbers. “Well…it varies, you see, because we never know when we'll get called out, but let's see…I usually drink at least a cup before I leave home, but I didn't have time this morning. Then, I usually stop and get a large coffee on the way. I have that gone before roll call, usually. Then, I'll have three or four more at the station, then one or two more if we're here after a run.”

Brackett sighed. “Johnny, when your body is used to that much caffeine, it's not advisable to quit cold turkey.”

“He's right, Johnny.” Joe concurred. “My advice is to drink a few cups of coffee right now and see if your headache goes away. Then, if you really want to give it up, wean yourself off gradually.”

“Oh, OK…thanks, Doc.” Johnny was beginning to realize his dilemma.

Joe helped Johnny hop down from the table. “I think you can safely go back to work. Let me know if your headache doesn't go away or gets worse or if you develop any other symptoms. In the meantime, take two cups of coffee and call me in the morning.” Joe grinned and gave Johnny a pat on the back before heading out the door.

Roy cast a wary glance at his partner. There was no telling what could happen from here. Johnny had that same befuddled look on his face that he did earlier when he was trying to find the “opposite of coffee.” Suddenly, he looked as though he had come to a resolution.

“ Roy …”

“Don't say it.”

“Don't say what?”

“Whatever crazy reason you were going to give me for why you aren't going to walk down to that lounge right now and drink some coffee.”

“I wasn't going to say that.”

“Well, then what WERE you going to say?”

“I was just going to tell you I'm going to go get some coffee.”

Roy looked relieved. “Well, I'm glad you're done with this crazy business about doing the opposite of your instincts.”

“What do you mean? I didn't say THAT.”

“But you just said you're going to go drink some coffee.”

“Right.”

Roy 's patience was wearing thin and there were still 20 hours left in the shift. “This morning, you were so focused on…no, you were OBSESSED with finding the opposite of coffee.”

“ Roy , I can't believe you don't understand this. It's simple. You see, my instinct is to drink coffee whenever it's around. I've never actually had a doctor PRESCRIBE coffee before. I figure, since my instinct is to normally ignore instructions from a doctor, doing the opposite would be to go and have two cups of coffee.” Pleased with himself, Johnny headed for the lounge as if his behavior was the most normal thing in the world.

Roy stared blankly ahead for a moment before following him, mumbling something about “if I live to be 100” and “an absolute nutcase…”

The boys arrived back at the station just in time for lunch. There was a generous spread of cold cuts, cheese, rolls, and various condiments already on the table. Johnny was feeling much better after drinking his prescribed cups of coffee, and was ready for a good meal. He and Marco plopped themselves down while Roy headed for the coffee pot.

Cap looked up from his sandwich. “So…I take it everything's OK, pal?” Cap was actually a little surprised to see John back at work.

“Yeah, Cap…everything's fine. The Docs told me I was just going through caffeine withdrawal since I didn't drink any coffee this morning.”

“Yeah, John…what the heck WAS that anyway?”

“What was what?” Johnny asked through a mouthful of potato chips.

“Whaddya mean what, you twit!? That whole deal with the coffee this morning!”

“Oh, that…” Johnny answered, still chewing. Johnny leaned forward on one elbow, eyes sparkling at the brilliance of his new idea, and gestured with his sandwich. “Well, you see…”

“Coffee, Johnny?” Roy offered, holding the pot in front of him.

“ Roy …I thought we'd been through this already!”

Roy sat the pot back down on the stove. Without turning around, he said, “You just drank two cups of coffee at the hospital…”

“I KNOW that, Roy . That coffee was PRESCRIBED. This coffee isn't. Just get me a drink of water, would ya?”

Sighing loudly, Roy poured a glass of water for his friend and sat it down in front of him.

“Hey, thanks!” Johnny took a long sip leaving Cap and the rest of the guys anxious to hear the explanation he had started to give.

“Well?” Cap asked, taking a sip of his own brew.

Once Johnny realized all eyes were on him, he asked, “Well what?” through another mouthful of food.

“John,” Cap started. “Now, I want you to focus. The coffee, John. Remember? This morning? The coffee!”

“Oh…that's right.” Johnny went on to explain to Cap and the rest of the guys his decision to do the opposite of his instincts, fielding all their questions along the way.

Chet was the first to voice his opinion. “Gage…you're an even bigger screwball than I thought.”

“Well, Chet…it wasn't ME who was hurt at that last rescue, now was it?”

“Uh, Gage…I seem to remember you having a little trouble…you had a headache so bad you practically had Cap and Roy writing you off.”

“Maybe, but I didn't get HURT, did I?”

Marco had been taking all of this in. “I think what Johnny's trying to say is, if he had gone with his instincts, he might have fallen out of the tree or been the one to get attacked by the cat. Instead, he was safely resting under a tree. Right, Johnny?”

“Right, Marco.”

Chet got up and poured himself a cup of coffee. “Well, I still think it's screwy…”

Mike finally spoke. “I think it makes perfect sense.”

A silence fell over the day room as all eyes focused on the engineer.

“What?” Mike shrugged, popping a cookie into his mouth.

Cap stood up and walked over to the ringing phone. “LA County Fire Department, Captain Stanley speaking. Sure, Joanne. He's right here. Roy ? It's Joanne.”

Roy took the receiver from Cap. “Hi, honey…something wrong? What? You're kidding. How much? No…no, you're right. It's not worth it. We'll just have to junk it, I guess. Maybe we could sell off the parts. No, honey, that's OK. We'll figure something out. Uh-huh. OK…I love you too. I will…see you tomorrow. Bye.”

Roy walked over to the table and sat down.

“Everything, OK?” Johnny asked him, genuinely concerned.

“Yeah…well, not really. Joanne just got a call from the garage. It turns out it's going to cost more to get her car running than the car is worth. I guess we'll try to sell it for parts, but if that doesn't work, we'll have to junk it. In the meantime, she won't have a car to drive.”

“Man…that's rough.”

“Yeah. I guess we'll just have to look for another car.”

“I guess so.”

By this time, the coffee (and water) was consumed and the guys started getting up from the table to work on their various station assignments.

“Hey, Chet,” Marco teased his friend. “Those scratches on your face gonna earn you some sympathy from Elaine tonight?”

“Funny, Marco. For your information, Elaine is a very sophisticated chick.”

Cap carried his mug to the sink. “Kelly, I don't think you can use ‘sophisticated' and ‘chick' in the same sentence.”

“I'm serious, guys. She's something pretty special.”

Chet was right. They had all had the pleasure of meeting Elaine. She was beautiful, intelligent, sweet…she seemed like a real catch.

Roy was washing dishes. “You know, you've been going out with Elaine for quite a while now.”

“Three months. Guys, I never thought I'd give up my wild, bachelor ways, but I really think Elaine just might be ‘the one.' She really digs me, you know. And, I really dig her too. I might just ask her to marry me.”

Johnny nearly dropped the mug Roy had just handed him to dry. His instinct was telling him to make a comment at Chet's expense. Something like if she digs you, there must be something wrong with her. But, of course he needed to do the opposite of his instinct, so he put the mug away, walked over to Chet, gave him a friendly pat on the back, and said, “That's great, Chet. I'm real happy for you, man.” Johnny headed out the door, whistling a tune, leaving the rest of the guys dumbfounded once again.

Mike broke the silence. “Opposite.”

The guys nodded their heads in understanding as they went back to their chores.

Roy walked out into the apparatus bay and found his partner polishing the squad. He picked up a rag and started helping. They heard the phone ring and a minute later, Cap poked his head out of his office to inform Roy that once again Joanne was on the phone and that he could take the call in his office.

“Hi, honey. What?? That's great! We should really give her something…I know, but…well, I guess we can talk about it later. No…that's great! Tell her thanks! OK…love you. Bye!”

Cap followed Roy back out into the bay. “Well, you sound a little happier than you did the last time you talked to Joanne.”

“You're not going to believe this…” Roy was addressing Cap and Johnny, who had stopped polishing, and was interested in his friend's apparent good news. “Joanne just got a call from an older lady who she knows through her charity group. She's getting ready to go into a retirement home, and she asked Joanne if she knew of anyone who could use a car. She won't need hers anymore. Joanne jokingly mentioned the situation with HER car, and the next thing she knew, the lady offered her hers. Joanne didn't want to take it, but she insisted. It's only two years old, and it's only got 10,000 miles on it.”

Cap smiled. “Huh. You know who you are Desoto?”

“Who?”

“You're Even Steven.”

Johnny was about to say something when the klaxons sounded.

Station 51, Station 110, Battalion 14…structure fire…240 El Segundo Boulevard…240 El Segundo Boulevard…cross street South Alameda…time out 13:30.

“Station 51, KMG-365.”

The squad and engine pulled to a stop in front of an old, dilapidated, but apparently still inhabited duplex. One look around at the makeshift shelters and seemingly half asleep forms holding paper cups full of loose change in their laps indicated that this was not one of the finer sections of 51's response area.

“Oh, man…would you look at that.” Johnny glanced out his window at a woman picking garbage out of a discarded trash bag.

“Yeah…” Roy commented. “Makes me feel a little guilty about how we're always complaining about our paychecks…”

The fire was pretty typical. Everyone had made it safely out of the duplex, so Johnny and Roy got to be hose jockeys for a change, instead of rescue men or paramedics. That is, until Chet managed to burn his arm on a falling timber. The timber was headed right for Johnny's head, and when Chet pushed him out of the way, the flaming piece of debris struck his wrist. Luckily, nothing was broken, and the burn was minor. A quick washing with saline and a bandage, and Chet was fit for duty.

Within an hour, the fire was under control. It was decided that Johnny and Roy would drive Chet to Rampart in the squad as a precaution while the rest of the engine crew stayed to help clean up. Chet was already sitting in the squad when Roy and Johnny started packing up the equipment.

Johnny picked up the drug box. “You know, Roy . Cap's right. You really are an ‘Even Steven.'”

Roy slid the unneeded biophone into the compartment. “What do you mean?”

“Think about it, Roy . You lost a car, you got a new one. You're always breaking even at poker. Things always have a way of evening out for you.”

“Johnny…the car thing was a coincidence…”

Johnny had an idea, an idea he appeared WAY too excited about. “Hey, Roy . Give me five bucks!”

“What for?”

“Five bucks, Roy ! Just give it to me!” Johnny was frantically making a “gimme” motion with his hand.

Roy sighed and pulled out his wallet. He knew the quicker he gave in and gave Johnny the money, the quicker they could get Chet to Rampart. He was tired and dirty and didn't feel like arguing. Besides, he knew Johnny was good for it. He tugged out a five and handed it over.

Johnny walked over to a disheveled looking man who was sitting on a flattened cardboard box. His wild hair was standing straight up, and his tattered wardrobe was circa1955. “Here you go, man.” Johnny placed Roy 's five in the man's cup.

The man took Johnny's hand in a two fisted handshake. “Hey, thank you so much mister…”

“Gage.”

“Bless you, Mr. Gage.”

“You're welcome, mister…”

“Kramer.”

“Mr. Kramer…just put it to good use, OK?”

“Sure thing! Thanks!” Mr. Kramer sat back down on his cardboard mat.

Johnny walked back around to the side of the squad, feeling warm and fuzzy. He took off his turnout to stash it. He didn't even notice Roy giving him an incredulous look.

After Johnny had tucked away his turnout and closed the compartment door, Roy spoke up. “What was that!?” He pointed toward Mr. Kramer.

Johnny looked at Roy in disbelief. “He's homeless, Roy .”

Roy opened his mouth to admonish Johnny. I know he is…but that was MY five bucks…that's for ME to decide. He held his tongue at Johnny's wounded look. As big a heart as Johnny had, maybe he really just wanted to help the guy out, was a little short, and figured he'd pay Roy back later. Heck, they could even split it.

The expression in Johnny's eyes transformed from one of empathy to one of anticipation. “Let's see if you get your five bucks back!” Johnny was so excited, Roy almost caught his enthusiasm. Almost.

Roy paused, then said, “You really ARE from another planet.” He walked around to the driver's side of the squad and climbed in without saying another word.

Johnny just shrugged his shoulders and took his seat beside Chet. They made their way to Rampart.

E!E!E!E!

When Chet and the paramedics returned to the station, the engine crew was already back from the fire. Cap met Roy as he was exiting the squad. “ Roy …Joanne called again. She said to call her when you got back.”

“Thanks, Cap.” Roy wondered what Joanne was calling about this time. He headed into the day room to make the call. Johnny and Chet headed for the showers.

About 30 minutes later, Johnny entered the day room to the aroma of fresh brewed coffee. He decided he would about kill for a cup, but then he remembered he escaped injury or possibly even certain death twice today. Three times if you counted the fact that he had a mysterious headache that turned out to be nothing serious. He reasoned that his plan was working well, so he didn't want to jinx it by giving into his coffee craving, even though his headache was back in full force. He briefly thought about calling Early and getting him to prescribe some more coffee, but ultimately decided to pour himself another glass of water. He sat down on the couch to watch whatever cheesy program Chet was glued to. “Hey, Roy …what did Joanne want?”

Roy looked up from the newspaper he was reading. “Oh…she wanted to tell me our insurance company sent us a rebate check in the mail.”

“Good deal. How much was it?”

Roy paused, savoring this moment, then admitted, “five bucks.”

Johnny's jaw dropped, and he nearly choked on his water. Regaining his composure, he looked at Roy in wonderment. “Even Steven…”

Cap poked his head into the dayroom with a summons. He was dreading this conversation, but it needed to be done, and now was as good a time as any. “John? Can I see you in my office a minute, pal?”

“Sure, Cap.” Johnny walked his glass over to the sink and followed Cap out the door amidst snortles from his buddies who were acting like they were in junior high and Johnny had just been sent to the principal's office.

Once inside Cap's office, Cap motioned for Johnny to have a seat. Johnny had the look of a puppy who was about to be whipped and Cap had to stifle a smile. He was not happy that he had to have this meeting with John, but headquarters insisted, so Cap took measures to make it as painless as possible.

Johnny swallowed hard and sat up a little straighter in his chair. “What's up, Cap? Am I in trouble for something?”

“Well, not exactly pal.” Cap took a seat…not behind his desk, but in a chair right beside his anxious junior paramedic. “I got a call from headquarters the other day. It seems they've been going over the incident reports and injury records of everyone in the department…”

“And mine are a mile long.” The ‘about to be whipped puppy' now looked ‘whipped.'

“Yes, John…they are. But, now, I don't want you to get overly concerned about anything. I already explained to headquarters that you are highly competent and that your injuries have not been caused by carelessness on your part. I even went so far to say that many times, you end up carrying out the more dangerous rescues, because you're more able and agile, and because you're damn good at it.”

Johnny looked a little less whipped now. “So, what did they say?”

“John, to be honest, I don't even want to be having this conversation right now. Personally, I think it's a lot of bureaucratic bullshit…you know, how it costs the department money in insurance and overtime…yada, yada, yada. But, when the brass makes up their mind about something and hands down the orders, I have to follow through. Understand?”

“Yeah, Cap. I understand. So, am I fired or something?”

Cap's grin broke through. “No, John! You're not fired! Headquarters just wanted me to have a talk with you about it and help you devise a plan on how to avoid injuries on the job.” Cap framed his last seven words in ‘finger quotes.'

“But…if my injuries aren't from carelessness, how do I do that?”

“Simple. You don't. Now, just so I have something to show the chief, I typed up a little document that says we had this conversation. We both need to sign it and send it to HQ.” Cap handed the piece of paper to Johnny, who scanned it and sighed as he scribbled his signature on the indicated line before handing back to Cap.

Cap added his mark to the form, and placed the document in an envelope. Turning back to Johnny, he added, “Oh, and John, there IS one more thing.”

“What's that?”

“I decided to give you a little incentive to help with your injury record.”

“Oh, yeah?”

“Uh huh. My brother in law knows a guy who works for the NY Yankees. He's the assistant to the traveling secretary or something like that. Anyway…I've made arrangements with him that if you can get through the next month without a work related injury that results in a trip to Rampart or a missed shift, you can throw the first pitch in the Yankees/Dodgers game. Also…you'll have two of Dodger Stadium's best tickets for the game, VIP passes, AND you'll get to meet the Dodgers personally.”

Johnny was dumbfounded. “You would do that for me?”

“Sure, pal! Because a) I don't think you'll have any trouble doing it, and b) in a small way it makes up for the department's apparent lack of appreciation.”

“Wow, Cap! Thanks!”

“No problem, but…can I ask you something?”

“Sure, Cap.”

“This…uh…doing the opposite of your instincts thing…are you sure this is safe? I mean, I can't have you putting your safety or the safety of the rest of the guys or the victims in jeopardy.”

“Cap…trust me. I already said, nothing will change when I'm working a rescue. And by the way, I've managed to avoid one possible and one certain injury just today by using this system.”

Cap chuckled. He couldn't argue. Johnny did have two near misses today. He had no doubt that if he had not decided to do the opposite of his instincts, that he would have continued climbing that tree this morning. Sure, it was just a caffeine withdrawal headache, but…Then there was the falling timber at the fire. That one was more coincidence…or was it? “OK, John…just making sure. You're dismissed.”

“Thanks, Cap.” Johnny couldn't believe his luck. The LA Dodgers! He ran to the dayroom to find Roy .

“Hey, Roy ! Come here for a minute!”

Roy was still reading the paper. “What do you want?”

“Just come here!” Johnny was practically bouncing. He reminded Roy of Tigger when he got like this.

“Can it wait?”

“C'mon, Roy ! Pleeeeease! I gotta tell you something!”

Fully aware that he would get no peace to finish his paper until he found out what Johnny wanted, he followed him into the locker room. Roy only hoped he could find out what had Johnny so hyper AND read his paper before they got called out again.

At the lockers, Johnny took a quick look around to make sure they were alone and gushed, “ Roy …I'm busting, man. I'm tellin' ya I'm busting!”

“No kidding?” Roy was the master of deadpan. Well, maybe he was tied with Cap.

“ Roy …I'm tellin' ya…this ‘opposite' thing is the best decision I've ever made!”

“Johnny…you spent the whole morning at Rampart as a patient, a role we both know you hate, with a splitting headache. In fact, it looks like you have another one now. Please tell me how you think this is the best decision you've ever made? On second thought, don't tell me.”

When Johnny was in full rant mode, he didn't follow directions. “Let's examine the facts, Roy .” Johnny started counting off on his fingers. “One—I climbed down a tree instead of up, thus avoiding a probable fall or Purrfuls attack. B—I had a mysterious headache that turned out to be nothing but a temporary annoyance while I flush the caffeine out of my system…a decision that will prove to be VERY healthy in the long run, by the way. Three—Chet knocked that timber out of the way just in time for me to avoid a certain injury or worse. And D—this is the best part! Roy , I just can't believe this!”

“Well, don't leave me in suspense.”

“ Roy …you'll never guess what Cap wanted to talk to me about.”

“Let me guess? He found the loose seeds for your gourd?”

“Oh, ha ha! No, Roy. It seems HQ is a little unhappy with my injury record.”

“And this is supposed to be a good example of why your plan is working?”

“ Roy …will you just let me finish? Cap believes in me. He knows that my injuries aren't because I'm careless.”

“And?”

“I'm getting to it…I'm getting to it. Cap knows someone who works for the NY Yankees. If I can go a month without being injured on the job, he's arranged for me to throw out the first pitch at the Dodgers/Yankees game! I'll also get to meet all the Dodgers' players and I'll have two VIP tickets and passes! The LA Dodgers, Roy! This is a dream come true!”

Roy was legitimately hopeful for his partner. Johnny's bubble was so big he'd hate to be anywhere near if it popped. “That's great, Johnny. I really hope you can make it.” He patted Johnny on the arm.

“ Roy , don't you see? I've already avoided two injuries! If I just keep to the plan, I can't lose!”

“That makes sense, I guess.” Roy really hoped Johnny was right. There would be no living with him if he wasn't.

“Of course it does, Roy …of course it does.” Johnny walked back toward the dayroom, visions of peanuts and crackerjacks dancing in his head.

Roy followed Johnny back out to the dayroom. He poured himself a fresh cup of coffee, sat back down, and picked up his paper to resume reading. As soon as he was settled, the klaxons sounded. Sighing, Roy sat his paper and coffee down and headed for the squad.

Half way to their assignment, Sam Lanier's voice came over the radio. “Squad 51, cancel your response.”

Johnny picked up the mike. “Squad 51.”

Roy turned the squad around and they headed back to the barn. Johnny was relieved. Although he was certain his decision to do the opposite of his instincts was sheer genius, his caffeine withdrawal headache was getting worse. He couldn't wait to get back to the station and take some aspirin. Hmm…maybe I should take the opposite of aspirin, instead. Would that be Tylenol?

Roy noticed Johnny's confused expression and the way he sat with his forehead in his hand, leaning against the window. “Still have a headache, Junior?”

“Yeah… Roy ? Is Tylenol the opposite of aspirin?”

Roy wanted to scream. It really had been a long shift. It was going to be a long life if Johnny didn't get over this latest infatuation soon. He had to be confident this would be like all of Johnny's other ideas and schemes. The excitement would pass in a day or two, and his partner would be back to normal. OK…as normal as Johnny gets. If he was really lucky, he could get through the rest of this shift. There were what? Only about 15 hours left. Hopefully he could sleep through at least five or six of those. It was best to just play along. “Sure, Johnny. Tylenol would be the opposite of aspirin.”

Johnny's face lit up. He was so happy Roy realized the brilliance of his plan. “Yeah…thanks!”

When the boys arrived back at the station, dinner was on the table. Marco had made a big pot of his famous chili and it smelled heavenly. Johnny and Roy took their seats at the table. Chet was pouring coffee. When he got to Johnny, he handed him a tall glass of ice water.

“Hey, thanks Chet!” Johnny beamed, relieved that the guys seemed to be supportive.

“Hey, no problem Gage. But…uh…what about the chili? Don't you think you should eat the ‘opposite' of chili?”

“The opposite of chili…” Johnny said in a far off voice. “You know…maybe I should…”

Cap scowled over at Chet. Great, Kelly! He was happy with the water. Why couldn't you leave well enough alone? “John, don't even think about it pal! We are not, I repeat not, going to prepare a separate meal for you every shift.”

Roy inwardly smiled. This sounds like the conversation Joanne just had with Jennifer.

“But, Cap…” Kelly protested.

“And not a word from YOU, Kelly.” Cap went back to his meal, muttering something about Romper Room.

Johnny pondered all of this for a moment. He decided that drinking coffee was a voluntary act…a luxury if you will. Therefore, going against his instinct to drink coffee was warranted. However, eating was not voluntary. It was a necessity, especially in his line of work. He could not be effective at his job on an empty stomach. Besides, trying to think of what the opposite of chili would be was making his head hurt. Satisfied that he needed to eat whatever was placed in front of him, he heartily downed a big spoonful of Marco's spicy concoction.

A few hours later, Cap gave the order for lights out. Johnny had already gone to bed. The Tylenol hadn't helped his headache and he was miffed at Roy for pointing out that if his plan was truly working, then the opposite of aspirin should have made him feel better. Reasoning that NOT to be the case, the Tylenol hadn't worked simply because it wasn't the “drug” his body needed, he dismissed Roy 's argument and drifted off to sleep. Miraculously, the station was not called out at all for the remainder of the night. To Johnny, however, this was not mere coincidence. His uninterrupted night of sleep and his now absent headache were just two more pieces of evidence in support of his idea. He breezed out into the dayroom to have a bite to eat. He didn't notice the snickering of his shiftmates that hastily ceased as soon as he entered the room.

“Hey, Johnny!” Roy indicated the food on the table. “There's some cornbread here leftover from last night if you want some.”

“Yeah, thanks!” Johnny picked up a piece of cornbread and took a bite, sending crumbles down the front of his shirt and onto the floor.

“Hey, Johnny…what's the opposite of cornbread?” Marco was setting Johnny up, and Johnny had no clue.

“Wait, I know!” Chet volunteered, raising his hand. “Fruit cake!”

The guys snickered as Chet's remark earned all of them a glare from Johnny. “Ha…ha…ha!”

Mike, who walked in at the tail end of this conversation countered Chet's suggestion. “Actually, fruitcake couldn't be the opposite of cornbread because fruit and corn are both carbohydrates.”

Johnny smiled. “That's right! Thanks, Mike!”

The rest of the guys stared once again at Mike as he reached for a piece of cornbread. “What?”

One by one, the guys from B-Shift made their way into the station, helping themselves to cornbread and coffee. Station 51's A-Shift said their “goodbyes” and “see you tomorrow nights” and headed home. For the guys subjected to Johnny's latest scheme, the shift was finally and thankfully over.

E!E!E!E!

Johnny walked into the Garden of Eden herbal shop just as it was opening for the day after stopping first at the drug store to buy some more Tylenol. He started looking at the various teas that lined the shelves. His brow knit in confusion at the myriad of choices…detoxification tea, ginseng, chamomile. He heard a voice behind him, a friendly, sexy voice.

“Can I help you with something?”

Johnny turned around to see the most beautiful woman he'd ever laid eyes on, and Lord knows, he'd laid eyes on quite a few. His instinct was telling him he should ask her out before he left the store, but then he remembered he needed to do the opposite. Damn it! He almost said it out loud.

“Oh, hi! I…uh…well, I'm not really sure…”

“My personal favorite is…” the woman reached across the shelf in front of him, brushing up against his arm slightly in the process.

Man, she smells good!

She retrieved the box she was looking for and handed it to Johnny with a seductive smile. “Mayan Cocoa Spice.”

Did she really just look at me that way? Gage…get a grip!

The woman smiled at him and added, “But, of course we have many kinds of tea. Were you looking for something in particular?”

“Um, well…no. I mean, yeah. I mean…I don't know what I want. You see…I'm a fireman….” He said this last sentence as if it explained everything.

The woman's eyes lit up and she touched his arm.

What is she DOING?

“A fireman?”

“Yeah…well, it's just that we drink a lot of coffee, see. And, well…I decided yesterday to give it up.”

“Oh…I see. Well, then. You need something to give you energy, right?”

Right now, Johnny felt about as energized as was humanly possible. This girl was beautiful, and she seemed interested in him. “Yeah…and maybe something to help me deal with the caffeine withdrawal headaches in the meantime.” Suddenly his stammering stopped. This girl was remarkably easy to talk to.

“Here…try this.” She pulled down another box and handed it to him. “It's called Royal Vitality. It has ginseng in it to fight fatigue, and some other ingredients to detoxify and balance your system.”

“Oh…thanks.” His brown eyes met her green ones. “Miss…uh…”

“You can call me Sue Ellen.”

“Well, Sue Ellen…you can call me Johnny.”

Johnny took the box of Royal Vitality and the box of Mayan Cocoa spice and made his way to the counter. After paying for his purchase, he had to fight back the instinct to ask Sue Ellen out. She did after all seem like she was hinting in that direction.

Sue Ellen started writing something on a piece of paper. She handed it to him as she said with a seductive twinkle in her eye, “Oh, and Johnny…as far as the headaches go. Well, I think I can help you out with those.”

Johnny looked down at the slip of paper in his hand. It was a phone number, Sue Ellen's phone number.

“You want me to call you?”

Sue Ellen leaned across the counter and smiled. “I get off at 3:00 . Call me then, and maybe we can go get something to eat. Afterwards, I can come over and take care of your headache. Have you heard of shiatsu?”

Johnny had indeed heard of shiatsu, but didn't know much about it except that he thought it was some sort of massage technique. He remembered back to his experience with Cynthia. He figured something was wrong with her because SHE was pursuing HIM. It wasn't natural, he insisted, so he brushed her off, only to have her end up going out with Chet for a day at the beach in Mike's dune buggy. He remembered how he wanted to throw himself in front of the engine that morning. Now, Sue Ellen had asked him out. His instinct said no, so of course he said…”Yes, I have. And that sounds great. I'll call you at 3:30 , then?”

Sue Ellen smiled again and handed him his bag of tea. “I can't wait.”

Johnny bounced out to his car thinking 3:30 could not possibly come soon enough. What he didn't realize is that Sue Ellen was thinking the same thing.

E!E!E!E!

Johnny pulled his Rover into the parking lot of Star of Siam, Sue Ellen's favorite Thai restaurant. Usually when taking a girl out, Johnny would pick the place, so of course he did the opposite and allowed Sue Ellen to choose. She was very excited to introduce him to the healthy, flavorful food of Thailand . Johnny was a little hesitant, but figured that since his bachelor diet consisted mainly of cold spaghettios straight from the can and beer, that health food WOULD indeed be the opposite of his natural cuisine. Besides, Sue Ellen could have asked him to eat the spare tire on the Rover, and he would have gladly complied.

Much to Johnny's surprise, he was impressed with the food. He allowed Sue Ellen to order for him…coconut milk soup and pad kee mao. Johnny and Sue Ellen chuckled at the translation of the latter: spicy drunken noodles. Then, for dessert, jasmine sticky rice with fresh mango. The atmosphere of the restaurant itself was very exotic, fresh lilies and lotus flowers on every table, their sweet fragrances intertwining beautifully with the spicy cuisine. Sue Ellen and Johnny were fortunate to be seated at an outside table overlooking the ocean. There were lanterns hanging overhead that cast just the right amount of light, and you could just hear the waves softly breaking behind the melodic strains of the live klui flute player in the corner.

As enticing as the restaurant was, the conversation was even more so. Johnny could not remember the last time he felt this comfortable with a girl. Normally on a date, he did a lot of the talking. It wasn't that it was necessarily planned that way, but many times the girls he dated wanted to hear all about his daring rescues as a fireman-paramedic. Sue Ellen was interested in that part of his life as well, but she seemed just as interested, if not more so, in getting to know the real John Gage. It was a welcome change. By succumbing to the opposite of his instincts, Johnny allowed Sue Ellen to initiate most of the conversation, and he was amazed at how it seemed to be like a dance, with each voice surging and receding in perfect rhythm with the waves.

As Johnny handed his credit card to the waitress, Sue Ellen smiled across the table. “So, do you still want me to come over and do something about that headache?”

Johnny REALLY wanted to say yes. He did not want this fantastic experience to end any time soon, but a girl inviting herself over to his apartment? Wasn't that a little forward? He finally reasoned that it was the 70's, and besides, wouldn't allowing the girl to invite herself over to his place be the opposite of what would normally happen on a date? “Yeah, sure. If you want to.”

“Oh, I want to.” Sue Ellen countered with a gleam in her eyes.

E!E!E!E!

At Johnny's apartment, the couple was sitting on the couch, still engaged in conversation. Since Johnny would normally offer beer to a date, he picked up a bottle of wine on the way home and offered some to Sue Ellen. She graciously accepted, and before either one realized, the bottle was gone and the hour was late. Sue Ellen had explained to Johnny that it was best to wait a few hours after a meal for a shiatsu treatment, so they were passing the time getting to know each other a little better. Johnny was fascinated by Sue Ellen's knowledge of herbs and holistic medicine. As a medical professional, he never really gave much thought to the alternatives, but he was amazed at the similarities between the ancient Eastern practices and the herbalism and healing practices of his ancestors. He mused at the realization that while Western “modern” medicine had only been around for decades, alternative styles had been in existence for thousands of years.

Once it was determined it was time for Sue Ellen to demonstrate her expertise, Johnny was instructed to change into something comfortable. He exited his bedroom dressed in a pair of faded gray sweat pants. The transformation of his living room was exquisite. Sue Ellen had turned out the lights and strategically placed candles around the room. She had moved his coffee table out of the way so she could place a soft mat in the middle of the floor, and she plugged in a portable tape recorder and Johnny could hear tranquil instrumental music played at just the right volume. On the floor near the mat were a variety of small, dark colored bottles. As he took in the appearance of what was once his living room and the way the light from the candles danced around Sue Ellen's strong yet feminine features, he could only bring himself to say one word. “Wow…”

“So, you like what I did with the place?”

“Yeah…I can't believe this is still my apartment.”

“So, are you ready?”

“As I'll ever be.”

Sue Ellen had also changed into what she had previously called her “working clothes.” If these were working clothes, then Johnny surmised he was in the wrong line of work. Sue Ellen was the picture of comfort in a pair of ecru colored silk pants and a matching mandarin style top. Her long hair, which she normally wore loose, was now pulled back into a ponytail. “Come and sit down, then.” She said softly as she patted the mat in front of her.

Johnny took a seat on the mat beside Sue Ellen. She asked him how much he knew about shiatsu, and he admitted that he thought it was some type of massage, but that was about it. She proceeded to explain that shiatsu was actually another word for acupressure, but that she combined it with other massage techniques. Johnny had heard of acupressure, knew that medical science generally dismissed it as quackery, but many years of dealing with various childhood ailments by sipping concoctions made from the bitter ingredients in his grandmother's medicine bag taught him that alternatives often worked just as well.

Also, he knew alternative medicine tended to focus on the patient as a whole, treating the person, not just the problem. He and Roy both did a pretty fair job of remembering that, but sadly, not everyone did the same. Emergency medicine, especially, had a way of jading a person so that the symptoms became the main focus. Johnny sat almost mesmerized as Sue Ellen explained the concept of “ki” which she said was the “life essence” which maintains and nurtures the physical body, mind, and spirit. She went on to explain that ki is everywhere, moving and changing quickly from moment to moment, replenishing easily on a day to day basis.

“The human body,” Sue Ellen claimed, “is a field of continually moving energy, circulating through cells, tissues, muscles, and internal organs.” She moved to a spot directly behind Johnny, so that he was sitting with his back toward her.

“So, this…'ki' is moving inside of us…all the time?” Johnny was enthralled. He often felt aware of a certain omnipresent energy in nature. He supposed this was what Sue Ellen was talking about.

“Uh, huh.” Sue Ellen traced a finger lightly from the base of Johnny's skull diagonally to his shoulder blade and then straight down toward his hip as she spoke. “It moves through our bodies on pathways called meridians.”

Johnny suppressed a shudder as he felt the soft touch of Sue Ellen's hand on his skin. “Meridians?” he asked softly.

“Yes. Ki circulates through meridians to fill areas that lack energy and drain off areas where there's too much. It's called kyo and jitsu. It's similar to the concept of yin and yang. There has to be balance.” Sue Ellen picked up one of the dark colored bottles, opened it, and poured a small amount of fragrant oil into her hands, rubbing them together.

Johnny remembered a conversation he once had with one of the tribal elders on the reservation where he was raised. He taught Johnny that “good medicine” required harmony and balance, not just within one's own body, but within all of nature. “I think I understand what you mean.” His nose became aware of a dark, musky scent. It reminded him of the way the woods smell after a good rain. “That smells good. What is it?”

“It's called patchouli.” Sue Ellen placed her thumbs on either side of the back of Johnny's head, just under the occipital bone, wrapping her fingers around gently toward his face. “Relax and let your head fall forward.” As Sue Ellen started pressing and making a circular motion with her thumbs, she explained, “The body was designed to be self regulating. Most imbalances correct themselves. When a meridian becomes blocked, the ki can't flow freely, and our bodies let us know through pain or disease.”

“Like my headaches.” Johnny was already beginning to feel tension he didn't even know he carried fall away from his body, and Sue Ellen had barely begun.

“Yes…like your headaches. Right now my thumbs are over two pressure points or tsubo. These are points along a meridian where ki is most easily affected. Stimulating different tsubo will correct the energy imbalance and eliminate the symptoms or disorder…in your case, headaches.” Sue Ellen slowly moved her hands downward and began massaging Johnny's neck and shoulders.

“Well, Sue Ellen…I don't know if I know my ki from my tsubo, but whatever you're doing sure feels great.” Johnny issued a small moan of pleasure and relaxation.

Sue Ellen leaned in close to Johnny's ear and whispered, “And I'm just getting started.”

Sue Ellen placed her fingers on either side of Johnny's neck vertebrae and began moving them up and down, pressing gently as she went. When she began to move her hands further down his spine, she coaxed, “This next part will be a lot easier if you lie down.” She carefully helped him ease face down onto the mat, placing his hands beneath his head. Sue Ellen alternated kneeling at Johnny's head and at his hip as her fingers worked their magic, releasing tension everywhere they traveled. She found a scar on his left shoulder, and lightly brushed it with her finger. “How did you get the scar?”

“Huh?”

Sue Ellen leaned in a little closer. “The scar, here on your shoulder?”

“Uhh…scar? I don't remember anymore…” Johnny could not remember ever feeling this relaxed.

Once Sue Ellen had completed her shiatsu/massage, she helped Johnny to sit up. “Careful…go slowly.”

Once Johnny was sitting cross-legged on the mat, Sue Ellen moved around to face him. “Here's something you can do yourself whenever you feel a headache coming on.” She gently took his hands in hers and placed her thumbs in the web of skin between his thumbs and index fingers. She started applying light pressure once again, making circular motions. She looked up at Johnny who was focused on what she was doing. “So…is your headache gone?”

Brown eyes met green, and Johnny slid his hands out from under Sue Ellen's, until their hands were simply holding one another. Without looking away, Johnny wondered aloud, “Headache? What headache?” He leaned toward Sue Ellen as she simultaneously leaned toward him. Their lips found each other, and Johnny slowly eased backwards onto the mat, taking Sue Ellen with him in a wanton embrace.

Johnny had never felt so alive, but suddenly the little voice in his head demanded to be heard. Oh, God…not now…go away. He knew where this was headed and he REALLY wanted it to go there. But…he had already reasoned that he found Sue Ellen because he was doing the opposite of his instincts. He did not want to blow it! Think, Gage, think! Let's see…normally I would invite Sue Ellen to take this into the bedroom right now. So, as much as I hate this…I have to put a stop to it. Gotta do the opposite. Oh, Man!

“Sue Ellen…” Johnny, out of breath, started to push back to a sitting position.

“Hmmm?” Sue Ellen went with him, but was reluctant to let go.

“Sue Ellen…I'm not sure where this is headed, but…well, I really like you a lot. I feel really lucky to have met you, I love talking with you and getting to know you, and well…I just don't think I should take advantage of the moment, you know what I mean?”

Sue Ellen sat back and looked at Johnny suspiciously at first until she realized he seemed sincere. She was impressed at the amount of respect he had for her and for their budding relationship. Turning her look into one of awe, she said, “John Gage…you are the exact opposite of every man I've ever met.”

Johnny had to try very hard not to let his jaw drop open. Did she just say what I think she said? Yeah…I think she did. “Well, Sue Ellen, I just thought maybe you'd wanna take things slow…”

Sue Ellen had to think about that for a moment. She really liked Johnny. The last thing she wanted to do was spoil things between them. Maybe they SHOULD take things slow…get to know each other. She looked back at Johnny's tousled dark hair, his slender yet muscular arms, and the way the candlelight was reflecting in his chocolate brown eyes. Naaah. “Well, Johnny…” she said as she positioned herself on his lap, facing him. “Maybe you should stop thinking so much…” She deftly moved one hand inside the waistband of his sweats.

Johnny tried to fight back his impending arousal. What was that? C'mon, Gage…we've been through this before. It's just not NATURAL for the woman to be the initiator. Wait…no, it's NOT natural. Giving in right now would be the opposite of my natural extinct, wouldn't it? Oh…thank god! With that realization behind him, Johnny and Sue Ellen's lips found their way back to each other, and he pulled her back onto the floor with a desire borne of mutual respect and adoration.

E!E!E!E!

Johnny awoke to the smell of onions and green peppers. For a moment, he couldn't figure out where he was. Why am I on the floor? Oh…yeah, that's right. Sue Ellen. He pushed himself up into a sitting position and caught the lingering scent of patchouli intermingled with whatever was being prepared in the kitchen. Do I have onions and peppers? Smiling, he stood up, pulled on his sweat pants and stretched, letting out a moan and a yawn.

Sue Ellen poked her head into the living room. “Good morning, sleepyhead.”

“Mornin'” Johnny started toward the kitchen.

“I hope you don't mind. I borrowed your car to go out and get some things. You didn't have much here, and I wanted to make you my favorite breakfast. You were sound asleep, and I didn't want to wake you.” Sue Ellen was stirring something in a frying pan.

Johnny walked up behind Sue Ellen and wrapped his arms around her waist. Whatever she was making looked a little like scrambled eggs, but not quite. “No…I don't mind at all. What are you making there?”

“It's called tofu scramble.” Sue Ellen turned off the burner and began dishing out equal portions onto two plates.

Johnny had heard of tofu. He knew it was a popular health food, but he had never tried it. Doesn't that come from soybeans? Yuck. How do I tell her I don't think I'm gonna like this? Johnny reasoned that he would never under ordinary circumstances eat tofu, but these weren't ordinary circumstances. His instinct was telling him to politely accept the food and try to distract Sue Ellen long enough to secretly dispose of it. But, of course, he needed to do the opposite. “Doesn't that come from soybeans?” He tried to push his apprehension aside.

Sue Ellen placed the plates on the table, then turned to get the pot of boiling water off the stove. “Yes, it does. Have you ever eaten it before?”

Johnny started to take the pot from Sue Ellen's hands, wanting to help. She waived him off and poured the hot liquid into two waiting mugs on the table. There were already tea bags in the mugs, and when the water made contact, Johnny could smell a fragrant blend of herbs. “No, can't say that I ever have.”

“Well, sit down and try it. You're in for a treat.” Sue Ellen returned the pot to the stove.

Johnny took his place at the table. He took a generous bite of tofu scramble onto his fork and tried it. It was delicious…even better than eggs, he thought. “Wow, Sue Ellen! This is really good!”

By this time Sue Ellen had joined him at the table. “I'm glad you like it. It's healthier for you than eggs, and definitely healthier for you than the stale jelly doughnuts I found in your kitchen.”

Johnny looked a little sheepish. “Oh, those…well, let's just say cooking is not one of my biggest talents.”

Sue Ellen leaned across the table slightly and smiled devilishly. “Well, thank goodness you have other talents.”

Johnny nearly choked on his eggs…er, tofu. He wasn't sure how to respond to that, so he changed the subject. “Well, you certainly have many talents. That massage last night was incredible! Now, here you are cooking this delicious breakfast.”

Sue Ellen blushed slightly. “I'm glad you enjoyed the massage, and I'm glad it helped your headache. With your job, it would probably be a good idea to have a shiatsu treatment on a regular basis. I'd be happy to do it, of course.”

Johnny felt like the luckiest man on earth. “Well, I'm sure not gonna argue with you on that one. It really felt great!”

Sue Ellen pointed to Johnny's mug. “Are you going to try the tea?”

Up until then, Johnny was waiting for the steaming liquid to cool down. “Yeah, sure.” He took a sip of aromatic brew, and decided it wasn't coffee, there was just no substitute for that, but it was good. “Is this the ginseng stuff?”

Sue Ellen smiled. “Yes…it's the Royal Vitality. Do you like it?”

He really did. “Yeah…I do. It's…different, but it's really good.”

Sue Ellen took their plates over to the sink. Johnny started to get up to help her, but she stopped him. “I know it doesn't have the same instant kick as a cup of coffee, but it really is much better for you. Drink several cups a day. Once you have the herbs in your system, you'll be amazed at how much energy you'll have.”

Johnny took another sip of tea. “Well, I'm gonna need energy if we have any more nights like last night.”

Sue Ellen walked over to the table, stood behind Johnny and wrapped her arms loosely around his neck. She leaned in and rested her head beside his. “Oh, I think we can count on a lot more nights like last night, don't you?”

Johnny stood up and turned around, facing Sue Ellen and placing his hands around her waist. “Oh, yeah…I think we can.” He leaned toward her and they shared a good morning kiss that left both of them breathless.

E!E!E!E!

Johnny and Sue Ellen stood just inside her apartment. He had driven her home so she could shower and get ready for work. Johnny was disappointed that she had to work today, but at least he would still be able to go play poker with the guys tonight, since she wouldn't be closing the Garden of Eden until 9:00 , and then had to balance the drawer, restock, and lock up.

Johnny and Sue Ellen stood facing each other, arms wrapped around each other's waists. “Why don't you just come over here after your poker game for a little… midnight snack?” Sue Ellen tempted.

“More shiatsu?” Johnny asked hopefully, but he had more than just shiatsu on his mind.

“No…sorry, not tonight. It's best to skip a day in between treatments, but I'm sure we can come up with some other, equally relaxing things to do. I have other ways to make you forget your headache.”

“I'm sure you do.” Johnny and Sue Ellen embraced with a longing kiss that had to last each of them all day.

Johnny reluctantly turned to leave, grabbing one more smooch for the road. “Tonight.” He affirmed as he bounced down the walk.

“I'll be waiting!” Sue Ellen called after him.

Johnny made his way to the Rover, the bounce in his step even bouncier than usual. On the way back to his apartment, he had another internal conversation. Man…this opposite thing is great! First, you cheat death twice in the same day, then you get that chance at the Dodgers thing that you can't lose, then you meet Sue Ellen, who is just incredible! Those guys better watch out tonight, ‘cause John Gage is feelin' lucky!

E!E!E!E!

Johnny arrived at Cap's house to find the rest of his shiftmates already there. Marco and Chet were setting up the card table on the deck outside the kitchen. Roy and Mike were sitting on deck chairs, talking. Cap was in the kitchen preparing bowls of munchies.

Johnny bounced out to the deck and stood leaning against the wall. “Well, Chet…I hope you enjoyed your winning streak, ‘cause I am feeling lucky tonight.” Johnny noticed Chet was looking a little glum.

“Go easy on him, Johnny.” Marco advised. “He had a rough day.”

“Oh, yeah?” Johnny was fishing for ammunition to use against his nemesis and good friend.

“Yeah,” Marco continued, walking over to Johnny. He then added, in a hushed voice, “Elaine broke up with him last night.”

Johnny wanted to make a comment. He had saved up quite a few for just this opportunity. God knows Chet was the first to jump on him every time he got dumped by a girl, which was often. This was even better…Johnny had Sue Ellen. It would just add more salt to the wound. He was just about to open his mouth to speak when he remembered he needed to do the opposite. The temptation to let the Phantom have it was overwhelming, but he didn't want to blow it now. He walked over to Chet, put his hand on his shoulder, and said sympathetically, “Man…that's rough. I'm really sorry to hear that.”

Chet looked at him skeptically. “Oh, c'mon, Gage. Out with it.”

“Out with what?”

“You know what!” Chet continued to count chips, placing them in neat piles. “You're going to make some smart comment about me getting dumped, so don't keep me in suspense. Just get it over with.”

Johnny sat down and started helping with the chips. “I wasn't going to make a smart comment, Chet.”

“Yeah, right.”

“Chet…can't a guy offer a little empathy and understanding without you jumping all over him thinking the worst. Give me a little credit!” Johnny was gesturing wildly, nearly knocking the chip piles over. Roy came over and placed his arm protectively beside the chips, earning him an annoyed glance from Johnny.

At that moment, Cap appeared on the porch, clapping his hands together loudly, thus ending the conversation. Even away from the station, Cap was Cap. “Gentlemen! I could use some help bringing the food out from the kitchen.”

Mike and Roy followed Cap into the kitchen while Marco, Johnny, and Chet counted out the last of the chips and distributed them evenly amongst the six places at the table. While the food was being set down, Cap offered, “Guys…there's plenty of beer in the fridge. Help yourself.”

The guys started filing into the kitchen. Suddenly Johnny stopped. The confused expression was back. Roy reached into the fridge and handed him a bottle of Pepsi. “What's this?” Johnny looked at the soda.

Roy had hoped his partner was over this fixation by now. God, please let this be easy… “It's a bottle of pop.” Roy answered. “I figured you were trying to figure out what the opposite of beer was.”

Johnny looked relieved. “Yeah, Roy …I was…thanks! But…I'm not sure that Pepsi is actually the opposite of beer.”

“Why not? It's non alcoholic and carbonated.” It isn't going to be easy. But then, with Johnny, nothing ever is.

The wheels in Johnny's head were turning. “Well, I always heard you're not supposed to mix hard alcohol with beer. You know…I'm thinking it's like when you mix oil and water…Hey Cap? You got any vodka?”

Cap looked at Roy with one of his classic “deal with your partner” looks.

Roy placed one hand on Johnny's elbow and the other on his back and began ushering him out the door toward the deck. “C'mon, Junior.”

Johnny wrestled out of his grasp. “Will you let go of me? What's your problem?”

“Johnny, we have to work tomorrow. Do you really want to be sitting here drinking vodka all night?” Roy gestured at the table as if to say ‘sit down and shut up.'

Johnny took his seat, defeated. “Well, not ALL night. Roy …”

Mike spoke up having overheard the exchange. “Actually, I think Johnny has a point. I think vodka would be the opposite of beer. My dad always told me…”

Cap put a definitive stop to the conversation. “Listen…it's a moot point, because I don't have any vodka, so now can we just play cards?” His patience was already wearing thin and they hadn't even started.

Johnny leaned back in his chair and grinned…the Pepsi vs. vodka exchange already forgotten. “I'm ready Cap…and I'm feeling lucky!”

Chet couldn't resist. Ragging on his favorite pigeon would help get his mind off Elaine. “Yeah, Gage…you say that every week, until I take all your money.”

Johnny popped the top off his soda and took a swig. Cap was dealing the cards, and Johnny started picking his up, rearranging them to form a hand. “Yeah, well that was then, Chester B. Opposite Johnny is flying high!”

Roy tossed a chip into the middle of the table. “Well, don't look at me to fix you when you come crashing down.”

Johnny kept arranging and rearranging his cards. “ Roy …I'm serious!”

“Yeah…I know…you cheated death…the LA Dodgers…”

Johnny had found his opening. “Sue Ellen…” He was grinning now.

Five voices chimed in unison. “Sue Ellen?”

Johnny tossed his chip into the pile. “She's this really incredible ch-I mean girl I met yesterday at the Garden of Eden herbal shop on Sepulveda. I took her out for a very romantic dinner last night...”

Marco placed his cards on the table, folding this round. “What were you doing in the Garden of Eden herbal shop?”

“Buying some tea.” Johnny said matter of factly as if it was the most normal thing in the world. “So, anyway…it turns out she knows shiatsu…”

“Shiatsu…isn't that some sort of a dog?” Chet laid his cards in front of him. He had a straight.

Johnny looked annoyed. “No, Chet…it's not a dog. It's acupressure.”

“Accu-what?” Cap revealed his hand, two pair.

Roy decided he would help his partner out a little. “Acupressure, Cap. It's a type of alternative medicine. It's usually combined with a massage.” Roy had a flush.

Johnny looked at Roy with a newfound respect. “That's right, Roy . So, anyway…she knows shiatsu. She got rid of my headache real quick.” Johnny smacked his cards down on the table in triumph. “Full House! Read ‘em and weep, gentlemen!” He quickly gathered his winnings.

Roy , Chet, and Cap discarded their cards disgustedly.

Roy took the cards, shuffled and dealt them. He looked at Johnny. “I know I'm probably going to regret asking you this, but I figure you're going to tell us anyway. So, she gave you a massage last night?”

Johnny started picking up his cards and ducked behind them with a devious grin.

Mike picked up on the innuendo. “Oh…so Johnny feels lucky because he GOT lu—“

“Mike!” Cap silenced his engineer.

Johnny's smile gave them all the confirmation they needed.

The six friends played cards until 10:30 . Johnny, having done the opposite of his instincts all evening…betting and folding when he normally wouldn't have, was the big winner. As if Chet's luck weren't already bad enough with his scratched up face, burned arm, and recent break up, he lost everything he brought to the table. At one point he wanted to bet his VW bus in an attempt to wrestle Johnny's winnings away, but Cap and Marco talked him out of it. Good thing, too. Johnny won the hand. Roy , of course, broke even.

Cap rose from the table. “Well guys, I think we ought to pack it in. We have to be at the station bright and early.”

In agreement with their captain and friend, the men helped clean up, then made their way to the door. Johnny was gloating over his winnings. Chet walked beside Johnny on their way out. “Gage…I just have one question. How did you know when I was bluffing? I mean, every time!”

Johnny shrugged his shoulders, counting his cash. “Your moustache twitches.”

Chet looked at Johnny incredulously. “My moustache?”

Roy grinned at Chet and patted him on the back. “I hate to say it, but he's right.”

“My moustache…” Chet made a mental note to shave before the next game.

The guys stood together at Cap's front door, engaged in a little last minute small talk regarding the game and tomorrow's shift. Johnny tucked his winnings into his wallet, and stuffed it in the back pocket of his wranglers. “Well, guys…I gotta get going. Don't wanna keep Sue Ellen waiting.”

Roy raised his eyebrows in a question. “You're going to see her now?”

“As in tonight?” Marco finished.

“Way to go!” Mike slapped Johnny on the back.

All eyes were on Mike. “What?” He asked indignantly.

Cap eyed his junior paramedic with uncertainty. “John…bright and early, remember?”

“Don't worry, Cap!” Johnny called back to him on his way out the door.

Cap turned and walked back into his house. It's usually when he says that, he gives me something to worry about…

E!E!E!E!

“Gooooooood mornin'” Johnny entered the day room in a good mood.

“Mornin'” Roy answered, sipping his coffee. “So, are we drinking coffee yet, or should I get you some vodka.”

“Go ahead and make jokes, Pally. I'm telling ya this opposite thing is the best thing that's ever happened to me!” Johnny put a pot of water on the stove to boil, pulled out a mug, and placed a tea bag in it. He then placed the box of tea on the counter.

Roy made his way to the table. “I take it things went well with Sue Ellen last night.”

“ Roy , I've never met a girl like her before in my life. Man, she's incredible…just incredible!”

“Yeah…so you said.”

“I'm serious.” Johnny tested the water with his finger, jumped and pulled it back, shaking off the burn. “I really think she might be ‘the one.'”

This got Mike and Marco's attention. They were sitting at the table.

Roy was now sitting down. “'The one?' Johnny…you've had two dates.”

“I KNOW that Roy , but…uh…they were pretty incredible dates, if you know what I mean.” Johnny grinned as he poured hot water into his mug.

Mike and Marco exchanged impressed glances. Marco spoke. “So, Johnny. You really think all this luck you've been having lately is because you've been doing the opposite of your instincts?”

Johnny was becoming way too excited. The way he was waving his arms around while holding a cup of nearly boiling water was making Roy nervous. “All I know is that from now on first is last, hot is cold, day is—“

“Night?” Mike played along.

“Yes!” Johnny pointed at Mike emphatically, then sat down at the table with his tea and a look of complete satisfaction.

At that moment a very dejected looking Chet Kelly entered the dayroom. In addition to the numerous scratches on his face and white bandage that still covered the burn on his arm, he was limping. He made his way over to the coffee pot without looking at anyone or saying a word.

The men seated at the table exchanged glances. Marco was the first to speak. “Rough night, amigo?”

Chet poured himself a cup of coffee, then plopped heavily down into a chair, sighing loudly. “I'm being sued.”

A chorus of “what?s” echoed in the room.

“You guys remember Kevlon Industries…the ones who were gonna market my human fly shoes, right?”

The men nodded with “uh huhs” and “yeahs.”

“Well…it turns out some homeless guy named Kramer volunteered to test them. He had a little accident, now he's suing Kevlon Industries AND me!” Chet looked positively miserable.

Roy took another sip of coffee. “You're kidding.”

The look on Chet's face was confirmation that he was not kidding. “Wish I was. I got a phone call last night from some lawyer…Jackie something…anyway, he's representing this Kramer guy. He threatened to take everything I own. When I got off the phone, I was so upset, I kicked the TV stand. I think I broke my toe.”

Roy and Johnny's looks changed to looks of concern and they immediately went into paramedic mode. Roy offered, “Really? Let me see…”

Chet shook his head. “No guys, it's alright…really”

Johnny started grabbing for Chet's foot. “Now, Chet…a minute ago you said you broke your toe. Why don't you just let Roy and I…”

Chet pulled his foot away and stood up. He limped over to the counter. “I said it's fine…I taped it up last night…there's nothing more that can be done for it anyway.”

Roy and Johnny looked at each other in agreement. Chet was most likely right. Even if it was broken, they wouldn't do much for it other than tape it.

For the first time, Chet noticed what Johnny was drinking. He crinkled his nose. “Man, Gage…what IS that stuff?”

Johnny took another satisfied swig of his brew. “It's tea.”

Chet was already in a bad mood. The bitter scent of Johnny's herbal concoction wasn't helping. “Yeah? Well, get it away from me. It stinks.”

Johnny looked annoyed. “It…does it…it does not…guys? Well, nobody else complained about it!”

Cap walked in carrying his clipboard. “Complained about what? Kelly…what the hell's the matter with you? You look like ten miles of bad road.”

Chet didn't feel like going through the story again, although he knew he would eventually have to speak to Cap about his latest misfortune. “It's a long story Cap.” He quickly changed the subject. “Can you tell Gage to leave that stuff at home? It's smelling up the whole station.”

Johnny sat wounded, with a hand protectively covering the top of his mug. Cap had to repress a chuckle. “What do you have there, John?”

Johnny defended his drink. Sue Ellen gave it, well, sold it to him. Besides, it was much better for him than coffee. “It's tea, Cap. It's got herbs in it. I feel so good now that I've been drinking this instead of coffee. You wanna try some?” He indicated the pot of still hot water and the box of tea.

Cap leaned over and took a sniff. “No thanks, pal. I think I'll stick with coffee.” He looked at Chet. “It's just tea, Kelly. It may stink, but I don't see any harm in it.”

Chet poured himself another cup of coffee. “Yeah, well…we'll see if you say that after we all end up at Rampart from breathing the fumes.” He picked up the box and turned it over. “What's in this stuff anyway? Cinnamon bark…honeybush…licorice root…ginger…panax ginseng…cannabis…”

Cap froze, mug halfway raised to his mouth. “Did you say ‘cannabis?'”

Chet was still looking at the box. “Yeah…”

Cap gave Johnny a light smack on the back of the head. “No wonder you're feeling so good!”

Johnny wiped at the tea that had just spilled onto his shirt. “What?”

Roy looked at Johnny incredulously. “You mean you don't know what cannabis is?”

Johnny frowned, his brow furrowed. “Cannabis…cannabis….” Suddenly a look of dawning realization. “Oh…cannabis is…”

Cap tossed the box at him. “Marijuana, ya twit!”

Johnny couldn't believe that the tea could be harmful. They couldn't sell it if it had marijuana in it, could they? He snatched the box up. “Let me see that!” He scanned the list of ingredients, mumbling, until he got to the one in question. “It DOES say cannabis!” Johnny was dumbfounded. This couldn't be happening. His luck was so good lately. He wouldn't have to give up his new tea, would he? He opened his mouth in defense of his drink, and then stopped. Keep your cool, Gage. Remember…opposite.

Chet felt his luck turning. At least he could still pick on his favorite pigeon. “See, there you go, Cap. We can't have him drinking that stuff and working under the influence…”

Mike, who had been quiet through this whole exchange, looked up from his coffee. “Actually, marijuana has a lot of health benefits. It's been used for thousands of years for medicinal purposes. It's calming and relaxing, yet it helps keep you alert.”

Again, five pairs of stunned eyes turned on the normally reserved engineer who was becoming more of an enigma with each passing hour. Marco broke the silence. “You're really beginning to scare me, amigo.”

Cap turned to look at Johnny. “John, we'll discuss the ingredients in your beverage of the day a little later. Right now, I have some fire department business to discuss, and this afternoon, tower drills.”

Johnny refilled his mug with some more hot water and another tea bag as Cap was speaking. He took a seat next to Chet, who quickly moved down a seat, away from the offending liquid. Johnny hated tower drills, and for a brief moment, forgot to repress his natural instinct. Maybe it was the weed. “Awww, Cap! Not another tower drill! We just spent a whole afternoon doing that last week!”

Cap walked over to the young paramedic and looked him in the eye. “John…was that the OPPOSITE of what you were going to say, or was that instinct?”

John slunk down in his chair, wishing he could disappear. “Instinct,” he said quietly.

Cap's eyes remained glued to Johnny's. “Stick with the opposite, pal.” Cap took his seat and began the meeting. “OK…Effective, January 1 st —“

Cap was cut off by the sounds of the klaxons.

Station 51…man over a cliff…meet the man on Old Topanga Canyon Road approximately 5 miles off state route 27…Old Topanga Canyon Road approximately 5 miles off state route 27. Time out 8:42 .

“Station 51, KMG-365.”

The trucks pulled off the road after having seen a short, bald man waving them over. Johnny was the first one to reach the man. “What happened?”

The man pointed down over the side of the road. There was no guardrail, and there was a steep incline. “It's my friend, Jerry! We were just walking along the side of the road, and he slipped. He's down there!”

Cap, Roy , and Johnny peered over the side of the road, scanning the area for any sign of Jerry. Roy was the first to spot him. “There he is! About 100 yards down!”

All eyes moved to find the spot Roy was indicating. Johnny noticed, “He's alive! He's moving! Hang on! Don't move! We're coming to get ya!” He started for his rappelling gear, because after all, natural instinct would not be to willingly climb down a steep embankment that eventually drops off as a sheer cliff.

Johnny and Roy were tied off securely to the engine, while Marco and Chet manned their lines. The two paramedics made their way down the embankment. Suddenly, and without warning, Johnny's rope snapped, sending him tumbling head over heels down the embankment and sending Chet, who was on his line, flat on his face.

Roy heard the sickening snap of a rope breaking, then looked over to see his partner somersaulting down the steep embankment. “Johnny!” He breathed a sigh of relief when he saw Johnny's life belt suddenly catch on something and bring him to an abrupt stop. He cringed at the thought of the injuries Johnny had to have, but he knew his first priority was Jerry. He made his way down to him, relieved to see that Johnny was moving. “Johnny…are you OK?”

Johnny remained still for a long time, catching his breath, thankful his downward descent had come to a halt. Strangely, the first thought to enter his mind was: Oh, man…I blew the Dodgers game! As his body began to stop shaking, he started to assess himself. Hmmm…a little sore. Bet I'm gonna have some spectacular bruises, but I don't think anything's broken. He heard Roy 's voice asking if he was OK. “Yeah! I'm OK!”

Roy breathed a sigh of relief as he reached Jerry. He called down to his partner, “Well, just stay put! Don't move!”

Johnny looked up the steep embankment. He really felt OK. Shaken and sore, but OK. His instinct told him to climb up and help Roy , so naturally he did the opposite and stayed put. “Not going anywhere!”

Roy took one more wary glance at his friend. Knowing Johnny, if he was OK, he'd be climbing up here right now. He must be hurt. Or is he doing more of that opposite nonsense? Roy sighed and looked at Jerry. He had a scratch on his arm, but looked OK. “Hi…Jerry, right?”

Jerry nodded. “Yeah, that's right. Listen I'm fine. Just scratched my arm. Your partner there looks like he needs more help than I do. Why don't you go down and check him?”

Roy quickly took Jerry's pulse. It was a little fast, but Jerry seemed stable. “Are you sure, you're OK…nothing hurts anywhere?”

Jerry shook his head. “I'm sure…just get me out of here when you can. Go help your friend.”

E!E!E!E!

Chet had been on Johnny's line when it snapped, pulling him off balance. He fell forward, smacking his face on the road. “Ahhhh!”

Cap ran toward him. “Kelly! What the hell happened?”

Chet sat up, holding his nose, blood freely flowing out of it. His eyes were already beginning to have dark circles around them. “Cap, Johnny's rope snapped!”

“Damn it!” Cap jumped to his feet. “Mike! Come over here and take a look at Kelly! John's in trouble!” He looked over the side of the road, and saw Johnny, tumbling like a rag doll. Like Roy , he breathed a sigh of relief when Johnny's belt stopped his fall and he seemed to be moving. He heard the exchange between Roy and his partner. “ Roy ! What do you need down there?”

Roy looked up at Cap. “Jerry's OK! He just needs help getting back up there. Send me a line for him and then send down a stokes, backboard, and C-collar for Johnny.”

Cap shook his head. Well, so much for the Dodgers, pal. “You got it!”

Cap turned to look at Chet and Mike. “How're YOU doing, Kelly?”

Mike looked up at his captain. “I think he's got a broken nose, Cap.”

Cap pulled out his H.T. “LA, Engine 51. We have a Code I times two at our location. Respond an ambulance.” He then headed for the squad to retrieve the equipment Roy requested.

A line was sent down for Jerry, and Cap and Marco helped bring him up to the road. When he reached the top, he expressed his gratitude to the firemen. “Hey, thanks! I really appreciate this.”

Cap shook Jerry's hand. “We're just doing our jobs.”

Jerry rubbed his chin, in thought. “Still, I feel really guilty. I mean, I do something really klutzy and your man ends up getting hurt down there. I'd like to make it up to you.” He pulled out his wallet.

Cap noticed what Jerry was getting ready to do, and held his hand out in a halting gesture. “Sorry, but we can't accept…”

Jerry pulled out a stack of tickets, held together with a rubber band. He looked around, as if counting. He looked back at Cap. “There are six of you?”

Cap answered. “Yes, but…”

Jerry counted out six tickets and handed them to Cap. “Here. They're for my comedy show. It's next week. If you guys are off duty, come check it out…on me.”

Cap decided that would be OK, and he accepted the tickets. “Thanks! Now, let us get your arm patched up before you go.”

Marco led Jerry over to the engine's running board to treat his scratch.

Cap resumed looking down the embankment, checking Roy 's progress with Johnny. Mike was on the biophone. “Rampart, we have two injured firemen. Victim 1 has a probable broken nose. Victim 2 has fallen approximately 50 yards down an embankment and has likely suffered multiple trauma…”

E!E!E!E!

Roy finally reached his downed partner. He immediately reached for his wrist to check his pulse. Hmmm. Normal . He looked at Johnny, noticing he seemed to be fine. Is he fine? Or is he not feeling any pain because he has spinal injuries? “Johnny? Are you hurt anywhere?”

Johnny nodded. “Yeah, Roy . I'm fine. Maybe a few bruises, but that's it.”

Roy wasn't convinced yet. He was concerned Johnny was trying to get out of a trip to Rampart because of the Dodgers game incentive. “Are you sure? Does your neck hurt…or your back?”

“No. Roy …”

Roy continued. “Do you have any numbness or tingling anywhere?”

Johnny rolled his eyes. “ Roy …I'm fine. Just get me out of here, OK?”

Roy was relieved, if not slightly amazed. He couldn't believe Johnny's luck. Maybe there was something to this opposite thing after all. “Sure, partner.” He pulled his H.T. out of his pocket. “Cap? Johnny's fine. You can pull the equipment back up. Just send me a line back down and pull us out of here.”

Cap and Mike exchanged amazed looks. Cap lifted his H.T. to his mouth. “ Roy ? Did I hear you right? John's fine?”

Roy chuckled lightly. “Not a scratch, Cap!”

Cap shook his head and smiled. He remembered the ambulance he requested. “Kelly's got a broken nose. We've already called Rampart. Do you still need the ambulance?”

Roy and Johnny looked at each other in confusion, each wondering how Chet managed to break his nose. Roy depressed the talk button. “No, Cap. We can take him in the squad.”

Cap raised dispatch once more. “LA, Engine 51. Cancel the ambulance.” He began working on getting the two paramedics topside.

E!E!E!E!

The paramedics and Chet stood at the base station at Rampart. Chet did indeed have a broken nose. While they were there, Dr. Brackett also confirmed that his toe was broken. The injured fireman would be going home for the remainder of the shift, but could return on Tuesday. The boys were talking to Dix, taking advantage of the run to the hospital to replenish their supplies. Roy glanced at his watch to check the time and noticed it was gone. “Hmph. Must have lost my watch on that last rescue.”

Dix handed a box of supplies to Johnny, then turned to Roy . “Really? That's too bad.”

Roy shrugged his shoulders. “It's OK, Dix. I'll probably find another one on the sidewalk.” He took Chet's arm, smiling at his raccoon eyes and the tape that covered his nose, and began leading him down the hallway. “C'mon Bandit.”

Johnny picked up the box of supplies and before turning to follow his friends, answered Dixie 's questioning look with a shrug. “He's Even Steven.” Johnny followed his friends back to the squad, nursing a few bruises, but relieved that he was still in the running for the Dodger's game. He should have been hurt, hell, he should have been KILLED in that fall. His faith in the law of opposites was affirmed.

The boys filed into the squad. It was lunchtime and their growling stomachs were letting them know it. Johnny turned to Chet and Roy. “Hey…you guys wanna stop for lunch on the way back to the station?”

Chet looked like a pouting child. “Idzup to you guys. Wo' be abol to daste it adyway.”

Roy kept his eyes on the road and stifled a grin. “Junior, that's the best idea you've had all day. Where do you want to stop?”

Johnny thought for a moment and then offered, “There's this new soup stand on Alameda . They say the owner is a little eccentric, but the crab bisque is supposed to be unbelievable.”

Roy put on his turn signal as he approached the intersection. “OK…soup it is!”

E!E!E!E!

One Month Later: Johnny sat in his Rover, looking down at the little black, velvet box in his hands. He smiled at his good fortune. Because he had cleaned up at every weekly poker game these past four weeks, he was able to put down a deposit on a beautiful engagement ring for Sue Ellen. Tonight he would take her back to the Star of Siam, the romantic Thai restaurant where they'd had their first date, then a moonlight walk on the beach, where he would ask her to marry him. He wasn't a bit concerned about what her answer would be. To top it off, tomorrow marked the one month anniversary of his talk with Cap about the LA Dodgers game. He had gone the whole month without a single injury requiring the treatment of the good doctors at Rampart, so he was ready to cash in on Cap's promise, thus fulfilling his life long dream. Yes, life was good for the dark haired paramedic, and he owed it all to his resolve to do the opposite of his instincts. He mused at how different his life may have been if he had come to that conclusion sooner, but no matter. Sue Ellen was waiting. He slid the box into his jacket pocket, got out of the Rover, walked to Sue Ellen's door, and rang the bell.

The door opened, and Sue Ellen stepped out onto the sidewalk. She and Johnny moved into each others arms for a hungry kiss. Sue Ellen pulled back first. “If we keep that up, we'll never make it to the restaurant,” she smiled.

Johnny leaned in to kiss her again. “Mmmmm, fine by me if we just jump ahead to the good stuff.” Their lips met again in another passionate embrace.

Finally, the couple made it to the car and to the restaurant. The meal was great, the atmosphere romantic, but the company was even better. Having finished their meal, Sue Ellen started walking toward the door. Johnny lightly snatched her elbow, leading her in the opposite direction. Sue Ellen looked at him quizzically. “Where are we going?”

“You'll see. I have a little surprise for you.” Johnny led Sue Ellen down the steps of the deck onto the sandy beach.

The couple walked hand in hand in the moonlight until finally, Johnny plopped down the bag he had been carrying over his shoulder. He opened it, took out a large blanket, and spread it out on the sand. He sat down and motioned for Sue Ellen to do the same. He then reached back into the bag and pulled out two wine glasses, and a small cooler that, when opened, revealed a bottle of champagne, and some fresh strawberries. “Thought you might like a little dessert.”

Sue Ellen took in the offering on the blanket and the surroundings. The night was clear and peaceful. Before them was the vast expanse of the Pacific Ocean , the moon reflecting off the distant breakers. In the foreground was the soothing sound of tumbling waves, and in the distance, she could just make out the lilting refrains of the restaurants klui flautist. Looking behind, she could see lights of the Long Beach skyline. She looked back at Johnny. “I'm more interested in what comes AFTER dessert.” She fed Johnny a strawberry.

Johnny looked out toward the waves that were gently lapping a few yards in front of them. His eyes caught the flicker of light on a glass object along the shore, the object he had secretly planted when Sue Ellen wasn't looking. “What's that?” he asked curiously.

Sue Ellen's eyes followed Johnny's gaze until they fell upon the object embedded in the sand. “You mean that?” she pointed at the object.

Johnny stood and took Sue Ellen's hand, helping her to her feet. Together they walked closer to investigate. Sue Ellen bent down to get a better look. “It's a bottle.” She picked it up. “And, it's got a note inside.”

Johnny feigned innocence. “Really? Well, let's take it back over there and see what it says.” He led Sue Ellen back to the blanket where they took a seat.

Sue Ellen pulled the note out of the bottle. The edges were damp from the briny water, so she handled it carefully. Gently, she unrolled the paper and held it in the moonlight to read it.

Wildflowers bloom on a mountainside,

As icy waters on their tumbling ride,

Flow in haste to meet the sea,

On a cycle that will always be.

Cycles, cycles everyplace,

Even in my life, I face,

The fact that cycles often race

With no regard to proper pace.

So I was born and grew up fast,

And now I'm free to love at last,

And need you to complete the chain

Of the cycle that is in my name.

While Sue Ellen was reading, Johnny knelt in front of her. When Sue Ellen looked up, he tenderly took her hand in his. Sue Ellen gazed deep into mahogany eyes and searched for a clue to what Johnny was about to say. In his eyes she could have sworn she saw an ancient longing dissipate into a sparkle of resolute certainty. Her breath caught in her throat as realization awakened.

Finally, Johnny spoke. “Sue Ellen, for a long time I fooled myself into thinking I could be happy on my own. I had a job and friends that I loved, but something was missing. You and I are opposites in a lot of ways. You taught me that when two opposing energies combine that balance is achieved. I can't think of any better evidence of that than the harmony I sense whenever I'm with you. By helping me to find the opposite, you have opened my eyes to what it means to be complete.” Johnny reached into his pocket, pulled out the velvet box, and opened it, exposing the treasure inside. The diamond sparkled in the moonlight as Johnny continued. “Sue Ellen, I would be honored if you would accept this ring and be my wife.”

Sue Ellen silently held her left hand out in front of her. She hoped Johnny hadn't noticed it shaking. She didn't want him to think she was nervous. The truth was his words had struck her with a raw emotion which until this very moment she had never experienced. Reading her eyes, Johnny took the ring and gently slid it onto Sue Ellen's finger. The kiss that followed spoke with more affirmation than words could ever achieve. The cycle was complete.

E!E!E!E!

The next morning, Roy, Marco, Mike, and Cap were the first to arrive for their shift. Cap was in his office, and the rest gathered in the day room.

Marco was making coffee. “So, can you guys believe Johnny's luck at poker lately?”

Mike was seated on the couch, reading a magazine. “He's had more than just luck at poker lately. Have you guys SEEN Sue Ellen?”

Roy leaned against the counter. “He's got it in his head that this opposite thing is the reason for all of it…the poker games…Sue Ellen…the lucky breaks he's been having on the job. Normally I'd say he's out in left field, but I have to admit. Things really started turning around for him about the same time he started all of this.”

Chet moped into the room. He plopped down on the couch beside Mike with a sigh. If his friends weren't mistaken, they could have sworn he was ready to cry. Mike felt sorry for his friend. It really hadn't been his month. The Phantom wasn't even able to get one over on the Pigeon lately. “What's wrong?”

Chet sighed again. “My court date is next week. I can't afford a lawyer, so I have to defend myself. I'm gonna lose everything but the shirt on my back. Heck, as crafty as this Jackie guy is, I'll probably lose that too. Not that they'll get much, mind you. I'm flat broke, thanks to Gage suddenly learning how to play poker. I just don't know how he does it!”

Marco felt bad for his friend. He had really had a month from hell. He didn't know how things could get any worse for him. “Chet, I wouldn't worry too much about the court thing…my Tia knows a really great lawyer. I could—“

Chet waved him off. “No, Marco. Thanks. I wouldn't want to drag one of your relatives down into the mire with me.”

Roy walked over toward the couch. “Chet, I really think you're worrying a lot over nothing. The shoes weren't even patented. It was Kevlon's idea to use someone as a guinea pig to test them, not yours. And, they're the ones with the money. The lawyer is gonna go after them. Besides, your luck is due to change.”

Chet slunked even further down in his seat. “Oh, I wouldn't be too sure about that, Roy . I just came from Cap's office. Seems I've managed to break Gage's injury record.”

Mike looked up from his magazine. “Now, there's an accomplishment.”

Chet just glared at the engineer. “Very funny, Mike.” Suddenly Chet was struck to the core with a thought that hadn't occurred to him until now. It made his blood run cold. A look of sheer horror appeared on his face. “Oh, my God! Don't you see what's happened? I've become Gage!”

Suddenly the door burst open and Johnny bounded into the room. “Greetings, gentlemen! Great day for a ballgame!”

Mike, Marco, and Roy momentarily turned their attention from Chet's realization to their ebullient friend. Roy put a hand on Johnny's shoulder in an attempt to keep him from literally bouncing off the walls. “I take it you won the trip to the Dodgers Game.”

Johnny was beaming. “Cap just told me. One month with not a single trip to Rampart. Man, I can taste those hot dogs even as we speak!”

Roy never ceased to be amazed at the enigma which was his partner. He had just won the chance to throw out the first pitch in the game, he had VIP passes, and was going to meet the team. And, he was thinking about the hot dogs. He reached out, shook Johnny's hand and clapped him on the back. “Congratulations, Johnny. Really…that's great!”

Johnny thanked his partner, then flashed his trademark grin. “And guys…that's not all!”

Chet looked up at Johnny, and said sarcastically, “You mean there's more good news? Well, c'mon Gage. Don't keep us waiting.”

Johnny started to speak, then realized they were a man short. “Wait! I want Cap to hear this too. Cap?”

Cap had just walked in as Johnny yelled. “Right here, Gage. You don't have to wake the dead.”

Chet continued to feel sorry for himself. “Don't worry, Cap. I'm already awake.”

Cap peered at the downtrodden fireman. “Kelly, I'll just pretend I didn't hear that.”

Johnny couldn't contain himself any longer. He looked as if he would burst. Roy decided to help him out. He didn't want to clean up the mess. “Cap, Johnny was just about to tell us some good news. He wanted you to be here to hear it.”

Cap knew he had already given Johnny his bit of good news earlier. So, it must be something else. “Oh, yeah? Well go ahead, pal.”

Johnny's grin spilled over into his eyes as he spoke, “I asked Sue Ellen to marry me last night…”

Cap spoke what all the others were thinking. “And?”

“She said ‘yes!'”

The room erupted into a series of congratulations and comments about joining the ranks of the ball and chained. Johnny was ecstatic. The guys were happy for him. His expression was that of a man who knew in his soul that all was right with the world.

Suddenly, Mike had an observation. “Hey, Roy ! Do you see what's going on here?”

Roy looked confused. Yeah, Mike. My best friend's finally getting married. “What, Mike?”

Mike stood and indicated Chet and Johnny. “Well…you had a friend that was up and a friend that was down. Now…Johnny's up and Chet is down.”

Roy couldn't argue with that logic. “Yep! Things always have a way of evening out for me…”

All in unison, “Even Steven!”

Chet leaned forward and plopped his head into his hands. Has t