QUICK QUOTES: TWX 66 1/8 (-3 1/8), SPLN 37 3/4 (+3 1/16)
WCW logo - it makes noise
Sid Vicious is apparently back in the truck, telling a tech that he wants
this tape cued when he says - or else...
Opening Credits show the Nitro Girls in happier times - this week's
ratings box tweak is TV-14-DLS - YES! The S stands for WRESTLING!
The closed captioned logo is OUT THERE, obscuring the TV ratings box -
then, just for fun, it magically warps over to the other side of the
screen. Of course, what we should probably REALLY notice is that WE ARE
LIVE from the Indiana Pacers' new home, the Conseco Fieldhouse in
Indianapolis, IN 8.11.99 and broadcast ONLY on TNT! Immediately, we start
the cavalcade or interviews 'n' talkfests as
SID VISCOUS walks to the ring and has the stick. "Cut the music! I want
to make one thing perfectly clear. See Outsiders, I'm not as dumb as I
look! Yeah, that's right. See last week you guys tried to screw me - but
it didn't work. You wanna battle wits with Sid Vicious, Outsiders? Well
then you lose ... you lose that battle. 'cause you gotta remember
something - I have the brain of a psychopath. Shaddup! Back to you in a
minute, Outsiders, but right now what I wanna talk about is
Goooldbeeeeeerg. See last week I told the world - the entire world - that
I would prove that at Halloween Havoc, Goldberg said 'I quit. I
surrender.' So, videotape does not lie - so for the entire world, I will
show you, and you can hear Goldberg say 'I quit.' Now roll the tape!"
The tape is in black and white, and appears to be overdubbed with another
(Sid's?) voice. Or else Sid was talking over the playback. Oh, I'm
confused. "Did you hear it? He said 'I quit!' He gave up! He's a
coward! And that means that I am still the US Heavyweight champ--" The
Wolfpack theme interrupts here as the commentators fail to enlighten me,
but apparently that voice on the tape was really not Sid's live voice.
We'll probably find out later. Anyway, here's the OUTSIDERS, Hall wearing
the US title around his waist and a Walter Payton jersey (nice touch,
that) while Nash is wearing an Outsiders T and no FUBU. "Hey yo - hey,
hey, uh, Einstein - if you're the US Champ, then how come the belt's down
here? I, big man, I beat you last week." "No, what you did, Scott Hall,
you screwed me. You were supposed to lay down." "Hey big fella, I don't
lay down for nobody 'cause that ain't the way the Clique operates." "Well
then maybe you'll lay down right now." Nash stops him post mic spike.
"Whoa, whoa there hot shot. Now, granted, Scott's competitive juices got
a little outta hand last week, but big man, not one of the Outsiders hit
you in the bean with that crutch. So before you get your panties in a
wad, maybe you need to call out that Canadian hero Bret Hart, 'cause I
think your problem's with him...not us." This cues the music for BRET
CLARKE, out in a Calgary Hitmen jersey. He stops at the top of the ramp.
"You guys like to talk about panties, you know what you three guys are?
You're nothing but three big [mute]. Last week, I said it last week, and
I'll say it again right here and right now, Bill Goldberg is the United
States Heavyweight champion, and before this night is over, I'm gonna come
down and take that championship - that US title - and give it to Bill
Goldberg personally myself." "Hey, uh, hey Bret, you want my gold belt?
Don't sing it...bring it!" Hart starts down the ramp...walking better
this week...but before he makes it in, and as Sid starts laying in with
forearms as he parts the ropes, COLD BEER appears over the railing, having
come through the crowd. Gutshot to Sid, off the ropes, reversed, spear.
Sid takes a powder, Goldberg grabs the stick. "Sid Vicious. I don't
think so. You know, if I remember correctly, the first chapter ended in
Vegas at Havoc with you bloodied all over the ring. Now, you know what?
That wasn't enough for me, so I got another idea. How about a match where
only you or I can decide the fate? How 'bout an 'I Quit' match? You got
the [balls]? You got it. Now as far as the Outsiders are concerned, you
wanna play games - huh - you wanna play games with me? I got a game for
ya. How 'bout a little game of hide and go seek...YOU hide, I seek...and
Your hosts are TONY SCHIAVONE and BOBBY HEENAN. Let's head over to the
brackets and see what we got tonight. Tonight, second round matchups! In
Group 1, Bret Hart takes on Perry Saturn and Norman Smiley faces Kidman.
In Group 2, Total Package and Sting have already advanced to the
quarterfinals thanks to injuries to Meng and Diamond Dallas Page. Meng
was too injured to compete? Huh. In Group 3, Chris Benoit will battle
(ha) Madusa, while Scott Hall will take on Lash LeRoux. Finally, in Group
4, it's Buff Bagwell taking on Vampiro, and Curt Hennig fighting Jeff
Jarrett. So there's six matches for tonight...in addition, the Total
Package WILL wrestle tonight - taking on Sid Vicious. And...sit
down...Sting takes on Goldberg!
MIKE TENAY stands in the back with Sting, who is flexing a bat, and
questioning the motives of his good pal the Total Package. Tonight, he's
got something to prove against Goldberg, and ah...it's showtime folks!
Meanwhile...Liz, having pronounced the coast clear, drags a hooded,
sunglassed Package into the arena...
Let Us Take You Back to Last Monday, when Kimberly ran down David
Flair while dressed as a jawa
Earlier Today, Kimberly caught up to Doug Dillenger and asked for some
extra security - apparently, David's been doing a lot of calling lately
Elsewhere, Hall asks Nash if perhaps they should get some security. Nash
says that's a good idea - he can't be bothered while he's managing Hall.
Nash brandishes his brand new mounted AND lacquered plaque holding the
license - we cut off for
Close Captioning (where available) paid for by Toy Biz' WCW Tough Talkin'
Wrestlers! "They're really talking to each other!"
Already in the ring, the FILTHY ANIMALS and TORRIE SAMUDA have some words
for the Revolution. They've got Torrie, and they can keep "their mutt."
Rey dry humps the second rope. DEAN MALENKO & ASYA come out and take
offense. Are her nipples in the wrong place or is that just me? Anyway,
Dean challenges Rey & Torrie to a mixed tag. "Hey Rey, let me ask you
something - you got a set on ya? Are you still workin' that knee, Rey?"
and he chuckles. Rey says that if he wants to unleash the freaky beast,
they'll muzzle her and take her to the pound. Now that's just
disrespectful to women!
SCREAMIN' NORMAN SMILEY v. KIDMAN (with Filthy Animals) in second round
title tourney match, oh, and now it's hardcore (Group 1) - Smiley, he of
the new moniker, comes to the ring clad in full hockey regalia, save his
lovely peach shoes. Later tonight, a Tejas Tornado ladder match for the
US title - Hall, Hart, Vicious and Goldberg. Special guest referee!
Don't you DARE change the channel! All your favourite wrestlers - twice
in one night! Just for even MORE fun, here's NASTY BRIAN KNOBBS and JAMES
HART come down to the commentary area. Knobbs is doing a lot of shouting
- I *believe* the gist is that "hardcore" is a word that shouldn't be
thrown out by Smiley. What you've missed while I've been typing this is
Kidman spanking Smiley, and Smiley putting Kidman in the wheelbarrow,
smacking him up and doing him in the butt. Knobs, who happened to have a
hockey stick handy, walked over and destroyed it on Smiley's back while
Hart was up on the apron distracting referee "Blind" Billy Silverman.
It's an easy pin for Kidman (2:12).
WCW Mayhem: the Music will be available on the 16th!
Backstage, Sting is looking for Luger - who he fails to call "Total
Package" almost completely...not behind that door, nope, not that
Meanwhile, Liz and Luger huddle near some laundry appliances. Let's hope
those cameramen don't talk to each other about where they are!
Elsewhere, David Flair walks kinda funny...and lovingly looks into the
eyes of...his crowbar. Oh, Lordy.
Promotional consideration paid for by Slim Jim, WCW Tough Talkin'
Wrestlers ("They're really...wait, I said this already!"), The Matrix on
PPV ("Whoa!"), America (ha!) Online, and Hi-Ener-G, AND Hot Pockets from
Nash is being fitted for a turban while Hall accuses him of
turning into a "cartoon character." Seeing two riot squad members walk
by, Hall leaves the room to catch up with them...
This portion of WCW Monday Nitro is brought to you by 1-800-COLLECT!
I won't be cynical when I tell you that Sting and Goldberg is at the top
of the hour. Instead, I'll tell you that Metallica's "Seek and Destroy"
brings (THIS IS) STING to the ring. "Lex Lugerrrrr! Flexy Lexy! Total
Package, whatever it is that you call yourself now, I'm giving you exactly
thirty seconds to show up right here. We can do this nice and easy...or
we can do this nice and rough." He's Ike Turner! Fonkier than a
mosquito's tweeter! The music plays...but it's LIZ alone come out to
offer Package's apology personally. He treasures their friendship more
than anything, and he'd NEVER do anything to hurt that. Sting seems to
fail to buy this, then tells her that he wants to see Luger NOW. The
music starts again and THE NARCISSIST, still wearing his Pacers hooded
sweatshirt, comes to the ring. "Stinger, as I always have, for fourteen
years, I come in friendship. NOTHING has ever been able to get between
us. We can work this thing out, Stinger." Crowd boos. "Don't listen to
these fair weather fans, this is between YOU and I. Like it's always been
down the road...and Stinger, like Liz said, I truly am sorry. I value our
friendship, come out here, from man to man, to say it myself...and
Stinger...can you believe these people? We need to mend this fence,
Stinger, 'cause you and I belong together as a team, united, as one, like
we've always been, to be the very best in professional wrestling.
Stinger? Come on, man. Please? Stinger? What I'm trying to say, man,
is I love you like a brother. I love you, man, come on, give me a hug
Stinger, come on, give me a hug. Please Stinger. Come on, man. Please?"
Sting goes to the hug - but instead takes him to the corner...got him in a
choke. "If you ever swerve me again, I'll gitcha. I'm gonna rip your
throat out next time." Luger acts surprised as the music plays.
Kimberly, alone, mutters about her missing security. She's wearing her
"porno" ensemble. Suddenly, the lights go out, and a voice speaks.
"Kimberly...do you remember me? Don't worry - you won't feel a thing..."
Tony identifies the voice as David Flair. Rather than worry about
Kimberly's safety, however, he brandishes a CAN OF SURGE and tells us that
Goldberg is on them now, so we should buy them.
MADUSA v. CHRIS BENOIT in a second round title tourney match (Group 3) -
Let Us Take You Back One Week and show you how Madusa advanced in the
tourney (frenching Karagias) and how Benoit advanced in the tourney (top
rope headbutt off a cage - basically the same thing). Lockup, hammerlock
from Madusa, reversed, and he shoves her off. Madusa complains to referee
"Blind" Johnny Boone, and we're back. Gobehing, standing switch, full
nelson, to a hammerlock, Benoit shoves her again. Now turning to Boone,
Benoit leaves himself wide open for a kick, kick, kick, kick, kick, kick,
off the ropes is reversed, Madusa up - 'rana! Benoit ducks a kick and
takes her to the corner. KNIFE-EDGE CHOP! Boone goes over to check her
chest (heh heh heh) - Now EVAN KARAGIAS is out and dragging Boone out of
the ring. Boone back in, Karagias dragging him out again. Boone back in
the ring, Karagias pulls him out a THIRD time, Boone slugs him (!), now
they're trading punches! The rest of the officiating crew comes out to
separate them, and while all this goes on, JEDOUBLEF JADOUBLEREDOUBLET
runs out and starts brawling with Benoit. Boone manages to see THIS and
calls for the bell. (DQ 1:49) Jarrett takes the stick. "Hey Madusa!
Like I said before, this is not the WWF and we do not hit women here..."
and Madusa kicks him out of the ring. Jarrett no-sells all of it, then
tells her "Let me spell it out for ya - I just screwed you out of the
tournament." What is this WWF that Jarrett is talking about? I wonder
what channel they're on?
In "Mr. Russo's" office, Chavo Guerrero says he's here for his
opportunity. The Creative Control brothers snicker in the background.
"You did a hell of a job in that ham and egger battle royal - as a matter
of fact, here's your opportunity." Chavo opens the briefcase and
discovers...Amway products. Then (the unseen) Russo tells him to get the
hell out of his office.
Last week's New Year's Evil/WCW Mayhem Match of the Week saw Lash LeRoux
defeat the Cat - and also saw Don Comfort of Stroudsburg, PA win a trip to
the Astrodome! WCW Mayhem: the Videogame is IN STORES NOW!
Hacksaw Jim Duggan is "cleaning the Power to Be's toilet." What
could I POSSIBLY do working with THAT?
MATCH OF THE WEEK: DISCO INFERNO v. RICK WOOF WOOF (no entrance) -
Steiner, who I believe holds a belt of some sort - yet deserves no
entrance - attacks before the bell and attacks and attacks. Here's C.G.
Afi, who we learn will go by TONY MARINARA, joining the commentary team to
ask Disco for his money. Apparently, he delivered ten papers to Disco's
house at twenty cents a pop - and he wants his two dollars! Two dollars!
Two dollars! Two dollars! Two dollars! Two dollars! Two dollars! Rick
Steiner, following the ol' "bucket of concrete" shot, hits a belly-to-back
suplex for the pin. (1:37) He wants his two dollars! Marinara fails to
dump the concrete on Disco, as we cut to
Sting - doing pushups!
Meanwhile, Goldberg pulls on his Kiana energy band!
In the local spot, I learn that Survivor Series is Sunday!
In the other local spot, it's an ad for WWF Attitude: the videogame.
These competitors are BRUTAL with the promos!
Here's a Special Video Look at Goldberg - whoops, it's actually a new
T-shirt ad. Never mind.
Kevin Nash is the Grand Wizard of Wrestling - is anybody old enough to
actually REMEMBER the REAL Grand Wizard still watching this show? Nash's
performance, on the plus side, is good enough to keep him from spinning in
his grave. Hall tells Nash that he feels kinda bad about what happened
with Sid, and maybe they should try to make friends with him.
GENE O. stands in the ring with the eight finalists in the Nitro Grrl
search. This thing sure got dropped like a box of hot rocks, didn't it?
Nonetheless, they do a decent enough dance routine - any of them would fit
right in, for sure. Log on to wcw.com and vote! A.C. JAZZ (a white chick
who wears FUBU) hits the ring and then has them leave, dissin' them as
skanks (which, of course, gets muted by our helpful censor). Is she drunk
or something? Of course, this brings out SPICE, wanting to know "what is
wrong with you, girl." Jazz calls her "Mary Poppins," then calls her a
bitch. Spice calls her a "ho" and at least THIS time while they're
fighting, they manage to keep from laughing. Here's the other four NITRO
GRRLS come out to break things up - diving along the same lines as last
Backstage, Kimberly's chest heaves as she attempts to hide from the
gimping psychopath. Oh no, dropped the heavy metallic object! Yes, this
IS a bad horror film.
Tony and Bobby regard this with amusement. Does NO ONE worry about this
girl's well-being now? Is it because she's already married?
Goldberg and Sting are NEXT!
"Fear me...you will..." says the voice of Ole Anderson. With a bank of
fog, flames and two wires, DUSTIN RHODES "floats" to the ring. Hey, RAW
just started! Well, at least he's got cool music, but I thought they were
axing this gimmick? "Kill the music now." The lights come up and we see
that his entire head is painted white with red around the eyes. "I want
everybody in here to take a good, long look at this crap I'm in. I left
the World Wrestling Federation for gimmicks like this. If any of you
don't know, I was Goldust and Goldust SUCKED. Goldust NEARLY ruined my
wrestling career. You see, I wanted to come back to WCW because this is
home for me, and I wanted to be just me, just me, because that's what I
could do, just be me, but the Powers That Be...came to me and they said
'Dustin, you know...Dustin sucks. Dustin is boring.' So I am here now, I
stand before you - oh, and my new name is SEVEN now, by the way - they've
dressed me up like Uncle Fester to play trick or treat all year long. Uh
uh. Powers That Be - what you can do is take Goldust and [shove it up
your ass], you can take this silly lookin' thing, Seven, and shove it up
your ass, and you both can KISS [my ass]. Now last week, my father called
me - Dusty Rhodes - and it seems that he's no longer with this company,
after 25 years of building everything that you see right here and right
now, they kicked him to the curb like he was a piece of [shit]. Well
Powers That Be, that doesn't cut the mustard and now you have to deal with
me because you disrespected my father, you disrespected the Rhodes name,
and you disrespected me for the last damn time, you understand. So for
this moment on, tonight, and to the end of your lives, I am gonna make
your life a miserable hell, I'm gonna make WCW a miserable hell, and TNT
too. So boys, I know you're back there staring your little fat faces in
the monitor looking at me, you know one thing. Tonight and forever more,
you will NEVER - EVER forget the name of...Dustin Rhodes."
Sting is WALKING! Look at all those old WCW logos stenciled on those
Meanwhile, Kimberly has followed the standard formula by hiding in a room
with no other exit. "Kimberly...I know you're in here. Kimberly, don't
you want to play with me anymore? Kimberly...Kimberly..."
I thought his name was Dustin Runnels?
That World Wrestling Federation he was talking about...what's on it right
now, I'm wondering?
Okay, let me save you a few letters by coming out and saying that if you
have to kill off a gimmick, having played all them vignettes and all, it's
better to do it THIS way than pretend it never happened. There, you
Still, that "miserable hell" comment...
The Outsiders knock on Sid's door - Nash using his Grand Wizard (I assume)
Meanwhile, Total Package thinks he has a great idea to make things right
(THIS IS) STING (with TV-14-DLS ratings box) v. COLD BEER - sadly, the
camera on Goldberg cuts out halfway through the entrance. Even MORE
disappointing, they fix it so we can see more of the entrance. So the
firing of Dusty Rhodes, that was all a work, right? Goldberg takes on
Vicious in the "I Quit" match at Mayhem - pencil it in, Herb. Goldberg's
entrance takes (3:03). Lockup, to the ropes, referee "Blind" Mickey J.
asks for the clean break, and gets it - but it's short-lived as Goldberg
comes in with kicks. Off the ropes, reversal, Sting tries the sleeper.
Is he actually going down? Well, the NARCISSIT and LIZ are out - J. is
drawn to them and ends up going down at the hands of a collision. Liz
apparently has some mace for Goldberg - but no, they mace *Sting* for some
reason. A blinded Sting gets speared! Jackhammer! 1, 2, 3! (2:13)
Geez, that was...
Backstage, the Outsiders offer an apology - and their SWAT team. This
exchange is interrupted by Rick Steiner, who says...something...or
Meanwhile, Liz and Luger walk by Hacksaw Jim Duggan, who is mopping the
floor. Luger playfully walks away with a "wet floor" pylon. One can only
IMAGINE the mirth and hilarity that can only ensue in later segments!
Promotional consideration paid for by Talkin' Nitro Area, Hot Pockets from
Hot Pockets, a credit card bank, Mag-Lite (proudly made in Ontario), the
city of Las Vegas (what, the entire city?) and Hot Pockets For a Third
Time - why not?
Kimberly somehow escaped the copier room! She finds a guy in a "WCW
Security" shirt. "Security? Oh, thank goodness you're here - oh, gosh, I
got this lunatic after me, I don't know what he's gonna do!" Of course,
he turns around and it's Flair. "I can tell you EXACTLY what he's gonna
do!" Does Kimberly just go out of her WAY to avoid areas where people
actually ARE in this building?
Mike Tenay stands with Vampiro and the Misfits. Looks like some of that
leftover makeup from Seven has gone to Vampiro. Vampiro talks about the
lifestyle of a misfit, and warns Buff Bagwell that evil DOES have a place
in WCW. Sure, at the...no, no, never mind...
BUFF BAGWELL v. VAMPIRO (with Misfits) in a second round title tourney
match (Group 3) - Buff is ambushed by the Misfits before the match - after
a short 5-on-1 he's put in the ring. Apparently, these are just mind
games with Flair and Kimberly - and it's worse than physical abuse. Yeah,
but mind games probably don't bring the protests as much. Bagwell comes
back following a corkscrew moonsault off the top rope - in the process the
Misfits go down, referee "Blind" Johnny Boone goes down to a phantom
elbow, BYRLYN comes out, waffles Vampiro with a chain, here's a
Blockbuster. Oh LORD that's confusing. (1:22) Just to FURTHER confuse
us, Berlyn's bodyguard takes out just about all the Misfits on his own.
Berlyn gets a few shots in on Vampiro. Now CREATIVE CONTROL is out to lay
a few boots into Berlyn - apparently for allowing Buff to move on in the
Backstage, Package is clutching his knee - as the "Wet Floor" pylon looms
ominously in the foreground...hmmm...
When we come back, the EMT's, having strapped Luger to the gurney, tell
"Mr. Package" that they can't find anything wrong with his knee despite
PERRY SATURN (with Shane Douglas & Asya) v. BRET CLARKE in a second round
title tourney match (Group 1) - Douglas joins the commentary team as Hart
limps to the ring. To the ropes, clean break. Lockup, takeover from
Hart, knee to the shoulderblade. Arm wringer, Hart, laying into
the bicep. Saturn reverses, Hart takes him down, legdrop to the arm.
Hart appears to have picked a body part tonight - off the ropes,
shoulderblock, up and over, dueling hiptoss attempts, clothesline from
Saturn - flying forearm smash off the ropes - only 2. Saturn puts Hart in
the corner and wraps the injured leg around the second rope. Referee
"Blind" Mickey J. forces the break at 4 - twice. Saturn drops a knee on
the back of Hart's knee - and it looked bad. Spinning toe hold to a leg
scissors. Headbutt, suplex, quebrada misses. Hart is up - and Saturn's
down at the hands of a clothesline. Side Russian legsweep. Hart comes up
lame, there's the backbreaker. Second rope elbowdrop. Asya on the apron
- Hart distracted - 2 count from the ref, Hart (I guess) picks up as he
points to Asya. As J goes over to tell Asya to get down from there,
Douglas gets off headset, into the ring and gives Hart a headshot with his
cast, knocking him out. Saturn motions for the Spicolli Driver - and hits
it. 1, 2, kickout? Yes!! Right, right, off the ropes, Hart comes back
with a crossbody. Saturn kicks him off outside the ring. DEAN MALENKO is
out to work over Hart - CHRIS BENOIT is out to even things up. Now Saturn
goes over the top rope with a dive onto both men! Hart back in the ring -
Saturn going back in, going to the eyes for a little help - Sunset flip,
Hart rolls through - Sharpshooter applied...Saturn taps. (5:01) That
match was over five minutes - somebody needs to get fired!
Kimberly has once again managed to escape - she stands outside Russo's
office, but the Creative Twins deny her entry - it's not her time yet.
Meanwhile, Nash plays Carnac for Hall's amusement. "The answer is
3:16...the number of times the Undertaker has worked a pay-per-view main
event with Austin." Hall says something about being drunk for a year -
he's not BRAGGING, is he?
Jimmy Barron, even in this cost-cutting era, still has a job - and still
The WWF buys another local spot - this time to hype their 26 November show
at the San Jose Arena.
Total Package tells us how much his knee hurts. Liz offers to get some
BOOKA T. is out "unexpectedly." We learn that Stevie Ray was suspended
for losing to Buff Bagwell last week. "You know I know I'm not supposed
to be here tonight, but I just got a couple of things on my mind. And
that is Creative Control and Jarrett. Now I tell you what - I got a
coupla things I gotta say and I'm gonna say it like this. You three punk
asses back there know what happened just a week or so ago. And I'm gonna
say it like this - huh - now either you can bring your three punk asses
down here right now...or Booker T. can unbutton his sleeve like this...and
Booker T. will walk back up this aisle and come in the back, slap you in
the face, Jeff Jarrett, drag you two wanna-be bosses right in the middle
of this ring, and kick your ass right here in front of the whole world.
Second things is this - Creative Control, you have the nerve to suspend my
brutha, I tell you like this - I will suspend your damn life. So I'm
gonna say it like this - Creative Control, Jeff Jarrett, get down here
right now, and let's take it to a good old-fashioned Harlem Street Fight.
And THAT'S the whole damn deal."
BOOKA T. v. JEDOUBLEF JADOUBLEREDOUBLET (with gee-tar) & CREATIVE CONTROL
in a Harlem Street Fight - Jarrett takes the headset and says he's not in
this match. I'm gonna guess the muted word is "slapnuts," which I still
don't really know what it means. Seeing the twins in dress shirts and
ties reminds me of Southern Justice....yup. T. manages a brief flurry,
but it's stll two on one. T. ducks off the ropes, and there's a
double clothesline. Jarrett is in with the guitar, nope, but the twins
attack from behind. Three-on-one beatdown. Jarrett directing for a
guitar shot - but SOME CHICK is in and on Jarrett...Jarrett kabongs her
with the guitar (oops, so much for THAT storyline). Nick Patrick rings
the bell (DQ? No contest? 1:28) and here's a replay of the big right
hand, followed by the (purely defensive) gee-tar shot. Booker and the
woman walk off together - I guess later we'll find out if she's his sista,
or his wife, or what.
Here's Malenko and Asya - they're WALKING!
Meanwhile, Rey and Torrie are also WALKING! Something is said but I can't
Where's WCW going? Tomorrow in Champaign, Wednesday in Ft. Wayne for
THUNDER! Friday tix on sale for New Orleans for Nitro, Mobile, and
Starrcade in Washington! Saturday on sale for Lowell!
Nash and Hall and their riot squad are still there, yup.
Mike Tenay interviews Total Package, who says he can't compete until he
gets an MRI, so there won't be a match with Vicious tonight. Tenay says
the Powers That Be have said that if he doesn't compete tonight, Luger
will be out of the title tournament. Luger turns to Liz and asks her what
she's going to do about this...she wheels him off...
RAYMOND STEREO & TORRIE SAMUDA v. DEAN MALENKO & ASYA in a mixed tag -
before Torrie can take off her dress, Malenko attacks Rey from behind. In
the corner, Torrie manages to be distracted long enough by the action to
get handcuffed by Asya. ASYA WITH THE HALF HOUR SUPLEX!! Arrogant cover
(bicep) gets 2. Malenko in - double back elbow off the ropes, kickout at
2. Dropkick to the injured knee. Off the ropes, up and Rey hits a
dropkick on the way down. Moving over to Asya, Rey pulls up. She dares
him to hit and he won't. She turns to the crowd to gloat - and Rey
dropkicks her to the floor. Right to Malenko, again, whip into the corner
is reversed - hard. Off the ropes, Rey reverses and Malenko ends up
headbutting Asya into the stomach. She's in the ring - bronocobuster
MISSES! Malenko and Asya make a wish with Rey's legs wrapped around the
post. Back in the ring, Tejas cloverleaf. Rey taps out. (2:10) The rest
of the FILTHY ANIMALS are out with bolt cutters. We look at the top of
the ramp and see the rest of the REVOLUTION congratulating Dean and Asya.
Sid Vicious (and two riot squad officers) are WALKING! Have you figure
out who's under the helmets yet?
It's weird - the entrance ramp carpet just mysteriously appears and
disappears - does it correlate to whether or not there's a woman in the
segment? I do not know...
Poor Kimberly - she just breaks down in tears! Hey, I hear the
shower - "Hey Kimberly - it's kinda like deja vu, isn't it? But this
time, it's gonna be more than a spanking!" Help me out here, in this
battle...who's the face?
SID VISCOUS (with TV-14-DLS ratings box and the riot squad) v. THE
NARCISSIST (with Liz) - Still in the wheelchair with an icepack on his
knee, Package has the stick. Luger again says he can't wrestle tonight -
he needs that MRI. He hopes he can wrestle hurt in the tournament like
Hart did. (THIS IS) STING is out and extricating Elizabeth - then
wheeling Luger to the ring, and dumping him in following a shot to the
barricade. Sid wants to strike - but isn't sure. So he removes his
shirt. What a help. Stomping away now, I guess Sid's made his mind up.
Elizabeth is back out and shielding Package - he actually pulls her in
Sid's path. Sid gently picks her up and puts her aside. Then goes back
to the attack - big-time punching. Now attacking the "bad" knee. I can
see it now, prepping Sid for this match: "Okay, Sid, baby - the BAD knee
is the one with the ice pack on it." Luger collapses instead of being
whipped. Big boot! Here's COLD BEER - the cops steps aside for him -
spear! Luger offers his hand to Goldberg - Goldberg helps him up - then
spears him. Well, I guess it wasn't the Outsiders under the hoods after
all - but the story is that they DID conspire to get Sid once again...no
closing bell, let's call it (2:10).
WCW Mayhem is 21 November!!
Another strike in the local spot with a SmackDown! ad
NASTY BRIAN KNOBS (with James Hart) v. TRIPPA B in a Hardcore match -
winner to take on Norman Smiley at Mayhem - Speaking of SCREAMIN' NORMAN
SMILEY, he's joining the commentary team. Garbage can here, Surge cooler
there, next thing you know they're over the railing and Smiley follows
calling play-by-play. Here's a table, there's a basketball backboard.
Hart with the trashcan lid, Bigelow feels nothing and takes out Hart.
Trashcan. KIMBERLY, hysterical, appears and pulls Bigelow away from the
match. Referee "Blind" Johnny Boone, having nothing better to do, counts
to ten...meanwhile, Smiley is wheeling out the laundry cart that Knobs is
in. Knobs faces Smiley at Mayhem. That's a MONEY MATCH! (CO 2:54)
Hall, Nash, and many riot cops are WALKING!
THUNDER! ad features Curly Bill.
"WCW Mayhem: The Music" ad
WCW Magazine ad
Kimberly and Bigelow, wielding a baseball bat, look for David Flair...
Checking the brackets, the Group 1 Quarterfinal will have Bret Hart take
on Kidman. In Group 2, it's the Total Package and Sting. Group 3 will
have Chris Benoit take on Scott Hall, and Curt Hennig and Jeff Jarrett
will fight to see who'll meet Buff Bagwell in the Group 4 Quarterfinal.
SCOTT HALL (with the Grand Wizard and the riot squad) v. LASH LeROUX -
strange to see Hall coming out first here...isn't it? Let Us Take You
Back to Last Week and show you how Lash got here by aggravating Cat's
injured knee - he'll be out another three to four weeks. Have a
toothpick, Lash. Lockup, Hall shoves him. Lockup, arm wringer and
shoulder drives from Hall. Takedown. Standing over him and mussing up
the hair. Hall just slapping the back of his head. LeRoux manages the
back elbow, flips up and over and hits a flying something. Here's a
flying elbow. Dropkick! Hall rolls outside to consult his manager. Nash
offers the powder - the chloroform. Hall doesn't think he needs it. Hall
back in and he wants the test of strength. LeRoux checking with the
crowd...so Hall slaps him. Into the corner, knife-edge chop (woooo!),
again, mussing up the hair again. Into the other corner and following
with the lariat. Up - and down with chokeslam - but as he starts his
Giant imitation, Hall suddenly remembers the Giant isn't in the fed
anymore. Tony says Hall was "climbing the ladder" -
ahhhhhtheBULLSHIIIIIT. Hall is the last wrestler alive to use the
abdominal stretch. Wow, even adding a pull on the leg! You have to
wonder what Hall could be without being saddled with the big ol' goof.
Cheap shot by Nash on the outside, as if it's necessary. Scoop - and a
slam. Out of the corner - LeRoux puts a boot up - there's a double
axehandle from the second rope. High knee (I think) - missile dropkick!
Right, right, right, the Blues misses and Hall hits a right of his own.
Off the ropes, duck, but LeRoux's crossbody is caught - there's a fallaway
slam. I'm thinking "Thassit." Time now for the Crucifix powerbomb. We
call it the Outsider's Edge. Everybody calls it a pinfall. (6:14) The
police are called into the ring to surround the Outsiders. Then they're
asked to leave...and they all leave...but one. Nash decides it'll be fun
to play with the powder...he spins around the guard but he hits Nash's
hand into Nash's face. If you're like me (and that guy in the front row
that's just loud enough to make it on the commentator's headset), you
already know that it's COLD BEER. Spear for Hall! Too bad he didn't keep
the helmet on first - then it would have REALLY hurt. Spear for Nash!
Hit the music! Go to the ad break!
Hey, how about ANOTHER "WCW Mayhem: the Music" CD ad? It's out
Castrol GTX sponsors this replay of Goldberg taking care of the Outsiders.
Let Us Take You Back Two Weeks Ago when Curt Hennig told us that if he
suffers a pinfall, he's outta here. Here he is getting DQ'd against
LeRoux. Here's Disco Inferno leaving the ring and Hennig winning by
CURT HENNIG v. JEDOUBLEF JADOUBLEREDOUBLET in a second round title tourney
match (Group 4) - Hennig attacks on the outside before the match to get
the upper hand. Into the ring, right hadn. Off the ropes, Jarrett hits
an inside cradle for 2. Side headlock takeover for 2. Schoolboy for 2.
Hennig goes outside to tell Heenan that it's a conspiracy - even the refs
are in on it. Jarrett tries to attack from behind on the outside but
Hennig catches him and takes him repeatedly to the barricade. Knife-edge
chop, right hand, referee "Blind" Mark Johnson tries to pull Hennig back
and Jarrett gets in his shot to turn the tide. Punching away now. Hennig
getting cozy with the barricade. Rolled back in the ring, Jarrett helps
Hennig give us the "feet in the air" spot. Again Jarrett kicks the back
of the leg. Jarrett comes down hard on the knee across the bottom rope.
Knee wrapped around the ringpost as we look to the top of the ramp to once
again see CREATIVE CONTROL. Jarrett still working the back of the knee.
Hennig stops a wrap around the rope by raking the face. Jarrett trying
for the figure four - Hennig kicks him off. Off the ropes, but Jarrett
eats a punch in the gut. There's a kneelift. Right hand. 1, 2, shoulder
up. Hennig with a knife-edge chop. Off the ropes, Jarrett ducks and goes
for the Flatliner - but Hennig shoves him off - unfortunately, into
Johnson. There's the Hennigplex! But there's no ref! Here come the
twins - pulling Hennig out of the ring - into the barricade. Got him up -
LAUNCHED into the commentary table. There's a bodyslam - that breaks the
table! Johnson, having come to and apparently not noticing the broken
table, puts on the count. Jarrett tries to break the count while the
twins try to get Hennig in the ring...but he's dead weight. Johnson hits
10 - Jarrett wins but Hennig wasn't pinned. (COR 5:19) Finally getting
him back in the ring, Jarrett hits his Flatliner on Hennig - apparently
for Jarrett it's going to be called "the Stroke."
Backstage, Kimberly is WALKING! Unfortunately, the camera follows her a
bit too far and we see a whole buncha people in the background.
Here's another SmackDown! ad in the local spot - gotta keep the ratings
Your commentators have no table - but fortunately for us, they can still
KIMBERLY walks to the ring. "David, David Flair, I'm finished
running from ya. That's right, I'm finished. This is gonna end RIGHT
NOW. If you want me, I'm right here. Whatever you're gonna do to me,
man, you're gonna have to do in front of all these people. So come on,
come on out, come on man." Why didn't she do this two hours ago? Here's
DAVID SAMMARTINO - ERR, FLAIR doing his best Jack Nicholson on the way to
the ring. Somebody thought this would sell, right? From behind, TRIPPA B
runs up and waffles him from behind. "You wanna pick on girls, huh?"
Flair stops the onslaught when his trick knee acts up - followed by a
timely crowbar whack. With Bigelow out of the picture, Kimberly flees out
through the crowd - Flair following in deliberate fashion.
The Air Force wants you to AIM HIGH by taking a look at this replay!
If you can't wait to see what happens next, wait no further! Kimberly
RUNS to her car, David calls her name, the car keys drop, two camera
angles. She makes it inside the car - Flair climbs on top and smashes out
the windows and windshield. There's the Creative Twins...Flair runs off.
The door is opened (the door was UNLOCKED all this time? Geez Flair's
dumb) and Kim's taken off. The Powers That Be are ready to see her now...
SCOTT HALL v. SID VISCOUS v. BRET CLARKE v. COLD BEER in a Tejas Tornado
ladder match for the United States Heavyweight championship - Schiavone
runs down what happened tonight in case you just happened to flip channels
sometime between the beginning of the show and now. Sid wastes no time
laying into Hall with two intros unspoken. Here's Hart hobbling to the
ring jut as Hall starts to come back. Hall and Hart working together?
Hall offers the hand but Hart punches away on him. Here's Goldberg.
Goldberg kicking way on Vicious as Hart goes back to Hall. Sid rakes the
face. Hart with a Side Russian legsweep on Hall while Sid works on
Goldberg with punches. Here's KEVIN NASH in referee stripes with the
ladder - apparently it is *he* who is deemed the Special Referee for this
match. Hall is over the get the ladder - Goldberg meets him there.
Elbow, kick, Goldberg puts the ladder in the gut. Now on the back.
Goldberg thinks about taking it to Nash - but he's wearing the stripes.
Goldberg takes the ladder in the ring and to Sid while Tony announces that
a David Flair/Kimberly match has been signed for Mayhem. Oh...boy.
Random brawling until RICK WOOF WOOF walks out. There's a top rope
bulldog for Sid - Steiner almost landing on the back of Goldberg's legs in
the process. Goldberg and Steiner brawling - why not. Nash gives a big
boot to Goldberg, just for fun. Nash has a crowbar (who gave it to him?)
and he's just WAITING for Hart to grab the belt for some reason. There's
the Gillooly on Hart - who drops the belt in Nash's arms as he falls to
the mat. Nash holds the belt at the top of the ladder as Hall staggers up
the ladder. Got it. No opening bell, no closing bell, let's guess it as
(4:44). Now THAT'S a ladder match! Ladies and gentlemen, we have a new
United States Heavyweight Champion. We're outta here...no overrun? How