We thought about getting Trinny and Susannah to help us with this handiest of handy guides, but then we realised that we couldn’t really give a monkey’s what they’ve got to say so we did it ourselves. Enjoy, good people, enjoy.

1. Flip-flops

Not only do they prevent sweaty feet and look cool in the summer, they also mean your feet don’t have to come into contact with the manky, unidentifiable slime on the floor of the communal showers.

2. Tracksuit bottoms

There’s nothing like slipping into a nice pair of tracky bottoms after a few hours of hard lecturing. They are also obligatory for watching any sort of daytime TV in communal areas.

3. Hoodie

It’s practical and fashionable at the same time. Just stay away from university-branded hoodies: overpriced and a dead giveaway of your fresher status. Oh, and try not to get an Asbo.

4. Bathrobe

It’s brilliant for nightly loo visits or for those days when you simply don’t have time to get dressed due to essay deadlines. It also works well as an extra blanket if your housemates are getting stingy with the heating.

5. Beanie

Not only does it look good, it’s also great for hiding unwashed and unkempt hair. Avoid the Badly Drawn Boy “tea cosy” look, mind you: your head isn’t a teapot, so it’s common sense really.

6. Sunglasses

Great for hangovers, or hiding behind when scouting for eye candy around campus.

7. Big scarf

Obviously it keeps you warm, that’s a given. However, it can also work as a makeshift curtain if need be, unless you’ve got French windows, in which case it will have to be a very big scarf.

8. Trainers

You better bring a few pairs as you will live in your trainers during university. Not literally, of course, as then you’d need very big trainers to go with the aforementioned very big scarf.

9. Fancy dress

Fancy dress parties are an intrinsic part of university life. Whether it’s your old school uniform or a cowboy outfit you happen to have lying around (as you do), keep hold of it; you never know when you might need it.

10. Suit

Formal balls, dinners and job interviews require you to scrub up. Guys should stick to a dinner jacket and suit to cover both eventualities, and accept the fact that they’ll never look like James Bond. Girls can go mad on the dresses for parties, but go for a classy suit for interviews.

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