FLYING: Confessions of a Free Woman

Sooner than I could fully open my eyes on Wednesday 5th November, I rushed to my computer.  It was 6:45 am in London.  While my computer was starting up for what seemed like an eternity, I had butterflies in my stomach.  The BBC page finally uploaded.  In a split second my eyes caught the link I was quietly dreaming about:  “OBAMA’S  VICTORY SPEECH”.

But no matter how dreamlike this seemed, it was real.  Barack Obama stood proud, confident and victorious as he delivered his speech.  Before the time hit 2:10, I was sobbing.  He, like everyone listening to him, knew that this was one of those moments that will make the history books.

At 8.45am I took my daughter to school.  One of the mothers, a French-Algerian fashion designer almost jumped on me: “Can you BELIEVE IT?!?”  She could barely contain herself.  She said that both herself and her Nigerian husband were in tears this morning.

Back at my desk I listened to Obama’s victory speech again and again.  I was now paying attention to the crowd.  I listened to the vox pops from the streets of America. I looked at the pictures.  All I could see were peoples’ eyes, alive, overwhelmed and somewhat hypnotised by what they were absorbing.

But they were Americans, of course.  How could I explain my own feelings at that moment?  Me, a Bosnian Brit?  And that of my French-Algerian friend and her Nigerian husband?  The list could go on to fill the page as my phone kept ringing and my friends of all nationalities were desperate to share their excitement.

In the past few decades I moved a lot – from what used to be Yugoslavia to the USA, from the UK to Argentina and back.  Like most of my friends, I am a nomad.  I no longer see myself belonging to one country, and have lost a sense of national identity.

I belong to an increasing global community of people who see the world as one, who clearly understand that we can no longer separate national and international politics and economy, who are no longer willing to see themselves as separate from fellow human beings no matter where they come from, what the colour of their skin is or what their economic position is.

Like many people I met on my many journeys around the globe, I was completely disillusioned with the world dominated by the US politics and economic greed, and the violence and immorality with which it was pursued.  Anti-American sentiment was growing so intense that it was turning into hatred.  What happened to a country that proudly welcomed its immigrants with a Statue of Liberty?

In the days leading to the 5th November 2008 our world was disintegrating before our very eyes.  Even if those comfortably living in the West could not identify with those living in far away war zones, now they were deeply shaken by the market crash.  Collective fear of losing homes, jobs, ability to support families was spreading like wildfire.  As the world leaders were gathering to desperately save us from the catastrophe, it was clear to everyone that we could no longer only save just ourselves, either the world acts together or we are all down.

But back to the 5th November.  Even by 2pm I could not concentrate on my work.  I was still thinking of what exactly the day Barack Obama became the president of the US meant to us?  By us, I mean myself and my friends as I can only speak for what I know.  I wouldn’t be surprised though if there are millions out there who would feel the same.

It all came down to one word.  HOPE.  It is such a simple, gentle and feminine word but one that can change a human life.  One that can empower us to become stronger than we ever thought we could be and make us create what seemed impossible.  Without hope, we become disenfranchised from ourselves and from the others to the point of destruction on individual or collective basis.

For now, Barack Obama stands in our eye as a beacon of hope.  Here is a leader we all believe can stand up for a different world we so much want to see.  A world that is based on principles of political and economic justice for all, not just for a minority group of the affluent.  A world that can stop promoting greed and violence as acceptable but start creating new values.

The ecstatic reception to Obama’s election is perhaps only reciprocal to the amount of desperation we feel at the moment.  We all know that compromises and disappointments will doubtlessly follow.  Even worse, we fear for Obama’s life.

On the 5th November I listened to a lot of Dylan, especially Blowin’ in The Wind.  It felt like a good soundtrack for the day.  I looked up the date of its release.  May 1963.   That is 45 years ago.  The answers have been blowing in the wind for a very long time, but I asked myself - have the times really changed?

It was my 7year old daughter who helped me find the answer.  She came home from school the other day and asked me to tell her more about the story of Rosa Parks.   They had just learned about it in school.  Could Rosa Parks have ever imagined her single act of defiance of refusing to obey a bus driver would lead to a major historical change?  Could she have ever believed that only three years after her death a black man would be elected the president of the United States of America?

Maybe I am an idealist after all, but I do believe the change is possible.  As long as there is hope.

Duska is a filmmaker in London, UK. You can check her out at http://www.youtube.com/ddzagorac.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, November 25th, 2008 at 10:40 am and is filed under Politics, Freedom. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.