Date: Fri, 25 2003 22:57:25 -0700 (PDT)
From: “Hans Shizricht” <Rshxxx@yahoo.com> |
Subject: Teens and drugs
To: MDugan@xxxx

Hi Officer Dugan,

I have a 12 year old stepson who has been acting a little strange lately. He seems to be tired all of the time, he quit the baseball team, and his grades are slipping. I have a hunch that he might be experimenting with marijuana. How can I be sure? What are the warning signs? His mother simply won't believe that her baby boy is smoking loco weed. I have to know for sure before I confront her. I hate to bother you, but I don't know who else to ask. I've heard that DARE officers are trained in this area. Hope to hear from you soon,

Hans Shizricht (it's me, Shizzy)

From: "Michael Dugan" <MDugan@xxxx>
To: “Hans Shizricht” <Rshxxx@yahoo.com>
Subject: RE: Teens and drugs
Date: Sat, 26 Apr 2003 12:39:05 -0400

Hans,

I want refer to you to the below links to give you more information. The NIDA is great source and should help you. A drastic change in a child’s behavior can be an indication of experimentation with drugs. You are right to suspect that something is up. Hopefully your son isn’t using drugs. There are many indicators that can serve as warning signs for drug use. From the description that you have given, there is obviously a change in lifestyle. Now you need to determine the source of the change.
If you need further info, please do not hesitate in calling me at 2xx-xxxx. Here are some helpful websites that can help you deal with the situation.

http://www.drugabuse.gov/NIDAHome.html

http://www.nida.nih.gov/Infofax/marijuana.html

http://www.drugabuse.gov/MarijBroch/Marijparentstxt.html


Best Regards,
Officer Michael Dugan

Date: Mon, 28 Apr 2003 11:23:56 -0700 (PDT)
From: “Hans Shizricht” <Rshxxx@yahoo.com> |
Subject: RE: Teens and drugs
To: "Michael Dugan" <MDugan@xxxx>

Dear Officer Dugan,

Thank you so much for your reply. I visited some of the sites you linked me to and they were a big help. After browsing through them for awhile I came to the conclusion that Sam is probably smoking the devil's weed. I was suspicious enough to start looking around his room for drug paraphernalia. Not only did I find a sock with five fatties rolled in it, but I also found one of those giant hookas that he must have bought at the little Indian gift shop down the block. I confronted my wife with the drugs and she went nuts. She ripped apart his room and found more weed, a fifth of liquor, some hits of acid, and worst of all, an unbelievable amount of porno. Right now Sam is at school. This kid has no idea of how badly his mother is going to beat him. And she's no small woman.

I thought my wife could handle the drugs but the beat-off mags are a whole other story. Hopefully she will beat that kid so silly, he won't remember he found them in my closet.

Anyway, I found a scale and some baggies and I think this little son of a bitch is selling drugs out of my house. Can't I get arrested for this? I don't know what to do. I don't want my kid to go to jail, but at the same time maybe that would teach him a lesson. Give him some of that "tough love" I always hear about. I'm sure you deal with this all of the time so if you could give me advice on exactly how much"tough love" we could give without getting arrested, that would be terrific.

Thanks for your help.

Hans

From: "Michael Dugan" <MDugan@xxxx> |
To: “Hans Shizricht” <Rshxxx@yahoo.com>
Subject: RE: Teens and drugs
Date: Tue, 29 Apr 2003 12:21:45 -0400 --

Mr. Shizricht,

I'm glad that I could be of some assistance to you and your family. If your son is keeping illegal drugs in your house you can be charged with possession. The scale and the baggies are strong indicators that your son is not only using marijuana but selling it. That puts him into much more trouble than if he were just using recreationally. If he is selling drugs he could face multiple felony charges. While I am all for "teaching a kid a lesson," you might not want to beat him too severely. Let your son know that this kind of activity could potentially ruin his life. I strongly urge your wife to call me ASAP and hopefully we can avert disaster. 22x-3xxx

Best regards,
Officer Michael Dugan

Date: Wed, 30 Apr 2003 20:01:42 -0700 (PDT)
From: “Hans Shizricht” <Rshxxx@yahoo.com> |
Subject: RE: Teens and drugs
To: "Michael Dugan" <MDugan@xxxx>

Officer Dugan,

I'd like to give you a call, but I chipped my tooth on my wife's cassarole and I'm hopped up on drugs to ease the swelling. Don't worry they're legal drugs. Or so the doctor tells me.

Anyway, I have some interesting news. It turns out my stepson isn't the drug dealer we thought he was. The liquor bottle we found was filled with urine, not Cuervo Gold. I guess It's a prop he's going to use for his high school play. That's what he tells us anyway. I was too busy wondering if my son turned fruity by suddenly being interested in school plays to question him about why he's pissing in a bottle.

It turns out the pieces of paper that we thought were hits of acid are actually small stamps from Malaysia. Sam aparently started collecting stamps. First school plays and now stamps -- I think I have a lot more to be worried about then drugs.

As for the baggies of pot, my stepson confessed to us that he's been selling fake pot exclusively to my wife’s 86-year-old father, who suffers from glaucoma. Apparently he has been getting high off of the dirt and oregano Sam sells him.

We should have trusted Sam. Not some paranoid cop we don't even know (nothing personal) It turns out that his odd behavior is because of a breakup with his longtime girlfriend. We’ve decided to let Sam continue selling fake pot to his grandpa. We don’t see the harm in it. The only thing we're concerned about is the incredible amount of porno Sam has amassed. Thankfully I won't need to take Sam to jail. Unless of course it turns out that he's selling porn. Hope not.

Thanks for the help and keeping our streets clean.

Hans