KILLER COMPANION PIECES

Everyone likes to try and pin down the best possible double feature for those nothing-to-do Saturday nights. I know that, because I too am one of the (often) socially deprived recluses, endlessly seeking a solid grind house effect to occupy a drab evening. Well, I’ve tracked down some sufficient features, sure to keep you entertained into the early a.m. hours.

EDEN LAKE/THE COTTAGE
EDEN LAKE deals with a couple who opt to vacation, heading for what seems to be a mellow, isolated area. That is, until a group of brash, atrocious youngsters ruin any plans of solitude. This group is particularly heinous, and hell-bent on making these campers pay…for no apparent reason. The film is more sadistic and savage than most films the American market is blessed with, and as a result, viewers are treated to a carnal joyride that seems destined to end in the grandest of fashion: complete disaster.

THE COTTAGE employs a similar theme, but exercises an unpredictable set of plot twists which ultimately result in one extremely disturbing set of circumstances. When two brothers kidnap a young woman, demanding a large sum of cash for her release; things backfire in a way no one could imagine. It seems the cottage in which our victim is held captive doesn’t exactly harbor friendly neighbors. One of those neighbors in particular, is extremely menacing, deformed and rapacious in his desire to claim human flesh. Another grand finale here!

After watching these two films at midnight, back to back - I encourage you to throw some Vivaldi on the headphones…in hope your dreams do not betray you.

JACK BROOKS: MONSTER SLAYER/ARMY OF DARKNESS
JACK BROOKS focuses on Jack Brooks, a young man with a nasty anger problem. After seeing his family brutally murdered by a monster as a child, Jack grew up with plenty of problems. Well, now, as a grown man, it seems those problems may be back to haunt him. After accidentally unleashing an unspeakable evil, it’s time for Jack to face his demons, and take out a gang of hilariously gruesome obscenities in order to save himself, his few friends, and who knows - maybe the whole town.

ARMY OF DARKNESS is the third installment of Sam Raimi’s EVIL DEAD series, and it’s a blast from the Alpha all the way to the Omega. Much like Brooks, it’s up to Ash to conquer a wide variety of demons, ghouls and creatures that are just about indefinable. If Ash can’t stop a medieval apocalypse, it could mean our hero is stuck in a long distant past, and the world as we all know it, could be doomed.

These two make an absolutely incredible double feature. There’s so much over the top humor, obnoxious effects and classic one-liners that it’s impossible not to get a serious kick out of these two, especially viewed in tandem.

THE HITCHER (1986)/DUEL
THE HITCHER (1986) focuses on the psychopathic John Ryder (Rutger Hauer) who has a tendency to stick his thumb out there in the hopes of finding potential murder victims. He’s quite successful in his ventures, until he picks up a young couple who are a bit more resilient than past targets. A slick game of cat-and-mouse ensues, and a whole lot of carnage builds along the way. A great film, with a terrific finale.

DUEL, a bit more docile in terms of gore, is the tale of a man on a business trip who stumbles upon a nasty load of hostility en route to his destination. When a mild traffic altercation leads to a full blown psychotic case of extreme road rage, one man must fight for survival as a menacing semi bores down, and attempts to end things the brash way.

An excellent double feature sure to instill second thoughts within those inclined to road rage - these two are a perfect antidote for any lackluster television evening.

PULSE (KAIRO)/RINGU
PULSE is, unlike the American remake, absolutely creepy. The story now is well known, friends die, and ghosts communicate, and seem to almost transfer via computer connections eventually resulting in some great death scenes. The pieces to the puzzle are on the table, but can the puzzle be solved into time to save any more lives?

RINGU features a video tape that when watched, unfortunately brings upon imminent doom. Seven days after watching the film, expect a phone call, and shortly after that - expect death. There’s a riddle to be solved here, but the question is: do the films inhabitants really want to solve that riddle? Keep an eye out for a few disturbing moments, and a rather unsettling resolution.

A great companion piece here, as both films highlight the pinnacle of true modern terror in the Japanese market. Both films are sincerely disturbing, and the best part is: it’s not all about 150 million dollar budgets, but good ole fashion high quality storytelling!

ROSEMARY’S BABY/THE OMEN
ROSEMARY’S BABY is the story of a woman eager to finally give birth. At first, all signs indicate a smooth pregnancy. But as horrific nightmares and extreme paranoia (which may or may not be warranted) begin to eat at Rosemary, panic quickly sets in. The problem is, she can’t be sure if her husband is on her side…the same could be said for those eccentric neighbors of hers.

THE OMEN centers on little Damien, an adopted child who seems to be perfectly normal. Tragedies begin unfolding in frequent succession, and it seems that the apparently innocent Damien may be behind it all. Once Damien’s true identity is revealed, it becomes a battle of good versus evil - literally.

If ever there were two films regarding children guaranteed to scare the trousers off of you, these are the two to do it. The relation between the two films is incestuous, and after viewing both back to back, it’s a safe bet you’ll feel a tad less than ‘pure’.

HAUTE TENSION/THE DESCENT
HAUTE TENSION is essentially a tale of split personalities and obsession. Two women out to get away from things venture to an isolated home, inhabited by one of the girls fathers. In what seems like a run-of-the-mill trip, people begin dying - at a rapid pace. The murder’s are gruesome, but the antagonist is the real surprise here.

THE DESCENT follows a group of thrill seekers into an unexplored cave. Unbeknownst to these adventurer’s something sinister dwells in these caves. Who will make it out is a mystery, and just who will kill who may surprise, and disturb as well.

From the cinematography to the surroundings, these two share a great number of similarities. Don’t take that to mean either film is a rip-off of the other. These two are extremely unique, extremely disturbing, and undeniably enjoyable. Be prepared for the return of the heroine, savage or not.

THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE (1974)/THE HILLS HAVE EYES (2006)
THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE is as sadistic a film could be in 1974. This tale of dismemberment and tortured children still holds a hefty impact on new viewers today, 25 years later. A group of kids stumbles upon the house of their nightmares, where Leatherface and his family of freaks like to do all nasty kinds of things to anyone fool enough to approach their lair. Needless to say, there’s plenty of gore, and very few survivors in this exciting piece of cinematic history.

THE HILLS HAVE EYES (2006) is an enjoyable remake of Wes Craven’s 1977 low budget shocker. The ‘reinterpreted’ version is exciting. The detailed gore is enjoyable, and the story moves at a steady pace. A family breaks down in the middle of the desert. Well, this desert isn’t your normal desert (so to speak). Nope, radioactively mutated creatures dwell in this desert, and guess what: they’re cannibals.

Despite the age differential between the two films, they work wonderfully together. Both serve as clearly refined depictions of insanity and desperation at work. Both are unnerving, and I guarantee you - both will make you doublecheck your Mapquest directions before heading toward the unknown.

If you don’t mind franchise exclusive nights, you may also check these cool double features: