Yes, friends. The last day of 2008 is nigh and it's time for us to run down what made the year worthwhile for Maxim readers. We polled the masses in everything from music to video games to even the best thing to happen to guys and, well, here...we...go...

MOVIES
1. The Dark Knight, 70.59 percent of the vote
This one was a laugher. Heath Ledger and Christian Bale combined to score first place in your hearts, and a billion dollars (and counting) at the box office. Bats had some stiff competition this summer, but no crystal skulls or flying playboys could touch Gotham's nuttiest.


The Best of the Rest:
2. Iron Man, 12.67 percent
3. Pineapple Express, 3.85 percent
4. Quantum of Solace, 3.39 percent
5. Wanted, 2.49 percent
6. Burn After Reading, 2.26 percent
7. Rambo, 2.04 percent
8. Cloverfield, 1.36 percent
9. The Incredible Hulk,  0.9 percent
10. The Foot Fist Way, 0.45 percent



VIDEO GAMES
1. Grand Theft Auto IV (Xbox 360, PS3), 21.39 percent of the vote
When a game is both critically acclaimed and breaks sales records, it makes our job of awarding "Best Ofs" quite easy. While this year's crop of video games had a wide range of spectacular games, it's hard to not go with one that outsold every movie, including The Dark Knight, and had every video game journalist, New Jersey wannabe gangsters, and even Conan O'Brien singing it's praises. Niko Bellic's story of revenge-driven immigration and Rockstar's decision to take the series in a new direction–you're not trying to become the crime Kingpin, rather trying to take them all down–are just a couple of reasons why this one stands out from the rest and with downloadable content coming soon to the Xbox 360, it's sure to continue spinning in your console well into 2009.


The Best of the Rest:
2. Gears of War 2 (Xbox 360), 19.48 percent
3. Metal Gear Solid 4 (PS3), 15.91 percent
4. Fallout 3 (Xbox 360, PS3), 12.09 percent
5. Rock Band 2 (Xbox 360, PS3, PS2, Wii), 6.52 percent
6. Fable 2 (Xbox 360), 5.57 percent
7. Super Smash Bros. Brawl (Nintendo Wii), 5.3 percent
8. Left 4 Dead (PC, Xbox 360), 4.96 percent
T-9. Resistance 2 (PS3), 2.7 percent
T-9. Dead Space (Xbox 360, PS3), 2.7 percent
11. Little Big Planet (PS3), 2.26 percent
12. God of War: Chains of Olympus (PSP), 1.13 percent



MUSIC
1. Metallica - Death Magnetic, 32.65 percent of the vote
Addressing complaints that the sound on Death Magnetic is too compressed and tinny, Lars told us recently that "part of being Metallica is that there's always somebody who's got a problem with something that you're doing." Most don't have a problem though with the Rick Rubin-produced album, and would agree that it's Metallica's best in years.


The Best of the Rest:
2. Lil Wayne - Tha Carter III, 27.89 percent
3. AC/DC - Black Ice, 15.99 percent
4. Death Cab For Cutie - Narrow Stairs, 7.99 percent
5. TV on the Radio - Dear Science, 5.78 percent
6. My Morning Jacket - Evil Urges, 4.76 percent
7. Bon Iver - For Emma, Forever Ago, 2.89 percent
8. Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds - Dig, Lazarus, Dig!!!, 1.02 percent
9. Stephen Malkmus and the Jicks - Real Emotional Trash, 0.51 percent
10. Hayes Carll - Trouble in Mind, 0.51 percent



TV
1. Chuck/Entourage -- Tie, 16.14 percent of the vote
Whether it's a goofy computer geek hanging out with a smoking hot government agent or a movie star and his crew sampling Hollywood's smorgasbord of ladies, this year readers proved that must see TV involved guys getting lucky, or at least doing their best to get lucky. Well done lads. And while strong showings by Lost and Mad Men certainly kept us entertained, in the end, sci-fi, 60s-throwback and other creative scenarios proved no match for titties, and the scoring there of. Hmm, sounds a lot like a Web site we know...


The Best of the Rest:
3. The Office, 15.79 percent
4. Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles, 11.58 percent
5. Dexter, 11.23 percent
6. Fringe, 8.07 percent
7. 30 Rock, 7.02 percent
8. The Daily Show/Colbert Report, 6.32 percent
9. Mad Men, 4.56 percent
10. SNL, 3.16 percent



DVDs
1. Batman Begins [Blu-Ray], 25.93 percent of the vote
It really was the year of the Bat. Maybe it was the inclusion of the Dark Knight bank heist scene, maybe it was the cool packaging, maybe it was the fact that having a movie like this only available on HD-DVD seemed a cruel joke—whatever it was, this one rocketed to the main spot on your shelf.


The Best of the Rest:
2. Casino Royale: Collector's Edition [Blu-Ray], 25.93 percent
3. Pirates of the Caribbean Trilogy [Blu-Ray], 22.22 percent
4. The Godfather: The Coppola Restoration Set [Blu-Ray], 12.96 percent
T-5. Jack Skellington Bust Nightmare Before Christmas Collector's Editon, 4.63 percent
T-5. Mystery Science Theater 3000: 20th Anniversary Collection, 4.63 percent
T-7. Columbia Pictures Best Pictures Collection, 3.7 percent
T-7. Spaced: The Complete Series, 3.7 percent
9. Zodiac: Two-Disc Collector's Edition, 2.78 percent
10. Salo or The 120 Days of Sodom Criterion Collection, 1.85 percent
11. Planet of the Apes Collection [Blu-Ray], 0 percent

Honorable Mention:
The Dark Knight [Blu-Ray] - It was unfair to ask you to vote on a DVD you hadn't seen at the time of the voting, but we're pretty sure this one would be the undisputed No. 1 had it come out earlier.



GUY MOMENTS
1. Guy Ritchie gets rid of Madonna; gets $76 million in settlement, 39.91 percent of the vote
We love women. We really, really do. But, while things from the 80s seem to be making a fierce comeback, the mere sight of Madonna makes us want to pull on our Alf jammies and hide underneath our bed covers. The memo must have reached the 40-year-old film director as he and the pop icon have split up. Even better for him, he netted a nice going away present by way of a divorce settlement. Who says the judicial system is broken?


The Best of the Rest:
2. Scientists may have found the female G-spot, 22.48 percent    
3. Presidential politics got hotter with the pick of Sarah Palin, 19.72 percent           
4. The world was introduced to the cheeky Wii Fit Girl, 7.8 percent
5. David Letterman called out the utterly worthless Spencer Pratt, 6.88 percent
6. Paul Krugman wins Nobel Prize in Economics, 2.29 percent
7. Bill Gates retires from Microsoft, .92 percent




SPORTS MOMENTS
1. David Tyree's helmet catch on game-winning Super Bowl drive, 25.42 percent
Some may say that NY Giants quarterback Eli Manning's scramble away from the Patriots offensive linemen was a miracle unto itself, but Tyree, a little used receiver in the regular season, made a catch that will forever be known by the East Coast city dwellers as the "holy mother f---ing hell" catch. Not only did it lead to the eventual game-winning touchdown, but also spared the rest of America the sight of seeing another parade down the filth-infested Mass Pike.


The Best of the Rest:
2. Jason Lezak runs down the French for Michael Phelp's seventh gold in the 4x100-meter swimming relay, 21.19 percent
3. Tiger Woods winning the US Open on one leg, 18.64 percent     
4. Usain Bolt breaks three world records in the 100-, 200-, and 4x100-meter relay, 10.17 percent
5. Mario Chalmers' buzzer-beating three-pointer to send the NCAA title game into OT, 8.47 percent
6. Kevin Garnett wins his first NBA title after 13 years in the league, 6.78 percent        
7. Morgan State receiver Edwin Baptiste makes an amazing 60-yard grab, 4.24 percent      
T-8. No. 10 seed Davidson makes the Elite 8, defeating a No. 2, No. 3, and No. 7 seed, 2.54 percent
T-8. The Tampa Bay Rays make the playoffs for the first time in team history, lose in the World Series, 2.54 percent            
10. Jimmie Johnson becomes the second person to ever win three straight NASCAR Sprint Cup championships, 0 percent

Craziest Playing Field Unleveled
The Cowboys’ New Billion-Dollar Ranch
With their brand-spankin’-new enormodome of a stadium, the most hated/loved franchise in sports is either taking that old “everything is bigger in Texas” maxim to heart or Jerry Jones is overcompensating for an incredibly small penis. The billion-dollar behemoth is set to open in time for the Boys' 2009 campaign. So just what does a $1.3 billion price tag get you?

• Dubbed “Jerry World,” the stadium will accommodate up to 100,000 10-gallon-hat wearing, yippee-ki-yaying fanatics.
• Two 180-by-120-foot retractable glass doors for the ol’ in and out…
• 286 concession stands, to load up on beer, hot links, and brisket.
• 1,600 toilets to help fans dispose of all that beer.
• You think you’re hot shit with that 48-inch flat-screen in the den? The new stadium comes equipped with a 600-ton, 180'x50' LCD screen hanging midfield, as well as this bad boy at the door.
• 200 luxury suites for all the down-home rootin’, tootin’ good ol’ boys who can afford the $100K–$500K price tag.
• A ceiling so high that the Statue of Liberty could stand inside without torching the roof. Wait, the Statue of Liberty is alive? Run!
• An even bigger version of the Cowboys’ famed “hole in the roof,” so God can see every fumble.

Priciest Mistake Remover
Pharrell’s Flesh
Laser tattoo removal is for the poors. Hip-hop producer Pharrell Williams is spending hundreds of thousands of dollars to have a company in North Carolina grow him new skin in a lab, which he’ll then have surgically placed over his current slate of outdated tats. “It’s basically like getting a skin graft, but you’re not taking skin from your ass or your legs,” the painfully rich body art pioneer explained. After the surgery and healing have taken place, Pharrell can move on to phase two of his plan: getting a brand-new batch of stupid tattoos!

Most Hyped Movie Makeovers
Year of the Franchise Reboot
FRIDAY THE 13TH (February 13)
Where it left off: Jason Voorhees emerging from Crystal Lake holding the laughing, severed head of Freddy Krueger in 2003’s Freddy vs. Jason.
What they’re doing to it: Mashing the pivotal events of the first three movies (Jason’s drowning, his mom’s revenge, Jason’s return) into one fun-filled heap.
Big change: Fans with not much else to live for are complaining that the new Jason is “too buff” and is dressed “too hip.”
Silver lining: Stars O.C. alum Amanda Righetti as Whitney, a hot girl who presumably runs around in a tank top screaming.
Will it work? It’s produced by Michael Bay’s Platinum Dunes, which also brought us remakes of The Hitcher and The Amityville Horror…so probably not.

STAR TREK (May 8)
Where it left off: An ill-fated mashup between fat, old Kirk and wrinkly Jean-Luc Picard in 1994’s Generations. It went where no man should ever, ever go.
What they’re doing to it: Geek God J.J. Abrams is starting from scratch, following the early careers of the Enterprise officers.
Big change: A whole new crop of actors playing iconic characters, though Leonard Nimoy is rumored to turn up as an older Spock who meets himself thanks to time travel. Mind fuck!
Silver lining: Abrams knows how to do geeky without leaving you crippled with self-loathing.
Will it work? Beam up a nerd boner, Scotty!

TERMINATOR SALVATION (May 22)
Where it left off: The T-X comes back in time to kill John Connor and his future wife, only to be foiled by the original Terminator, who has been reprogrammed to be all nice.
What they’re doing to it: Fast-forward time! It’s 2018 and John Connor (Christian Bale) is leading the humans against Skynet.
Big change: No muscular, liquefied or hot Terminators you’d want to bang.
Silver lining: Batman kicks ass!
Will it work? After seeing footage, Arnold Schwarzenegger said, “I wasn’t sure who the Terminator was. I don’t know if there is one or if he’s the star or the hero.” Maybe it was a tumor?

Late-Night Tightrope Walker
Jimmy Fallon
You’re taking over Conan O’Brien’s seat this year. How have you been preparing?
Drinking raw eggs in the morning, pounding frozen sides of beef, yelling at my wife’s brother Paulie, running up steps someplace in Philly, sculpting a statue of myself, studying Clubber Lang films, and getting arrested in Australia for possession of steroids.

Is there anything you can tell us about how you’ll put your stamp on Late Night?
Let me put it this way. I’ve told one person. They went mad.

Is your show going to be the bee’s knees or the cat’s pajamas?
Neither. It’s going to be “the horse’s foreskin.”

What celebrity do you pray does not wind up on your couch this year?
Definitely not Dr. Lincoln Wolfenstein. By primarily concentrating on connecting theoretical physics to experimental observations, his work on weak interaction has, in my opinion, tainted his studies on the presence of electrons in Earth and solar matter and their effect on neutrino prop­agation. MSW effect or not, for a particle phenomenologist to focus solely on neutrino oscillation in matter…I mean, c’mon, bro. You don’t bring that shit to my house.

What are you most looking forward to in 2009?
Hair plugs.

You clearly know how to party. Any tips for readers on proper New Year’s Eve etiquette?
Always bring apology notes to a party in the event that you black out on Jägermeister and throw an ottoman through a window.

What are you least looking forward to sacrificing in order to keep up with your new rigorous schedule?
All-night crunchfests with Mario Lopez.

Hottest Lap
Danica Patrick
For three years Danica Patrick had more than held her own in the Indy Racing League, but her detractors always had a trump card: When is she gonna win a race? She shut them up in 2008. Patrick took the checkered flag at the Indy Japan 300 for her first victory—and the first victory for a woman behind the wheel of an IRL car. “When I saw her initially, it was just like any other driver getting that first win,” says Jack Arute, an ESPN analyst for 25 years and the first person to interview Patrick after her victory. “Then her mom got there, and an emotional avalanche occurred. She’d been dealing with those gender issues for most of her career, and she was relieved that the questions would now be over. She’d done something no woman had ever done.” To celebrate she unzipped her racing suit and...OK, no she didn’t. But, God, that would have been awesome. This year, besides raking in heaps and heaps of sponsorship dough, Danica has her eyes set on the ultimate prize. “My goal is always to win the Indianapolis 500,” she says. “I don’t know if there’s a bigger goal in motor sports.” Hear that, fellas? Danica’s coming for you fast.

Most Useful Accessory
GPS Chip
Attention, fashionistas: The must-have style item south of the border is the size of a grain of rice, encased in crystal, and costs four grand. But trust us, it is worth every peso. With kidnapping rates in Mexico up a whopping 40 percent in the past few years, thousands of affluent trendsetters are having GPS chips implanted in their arms so they can be easily tracked by el fuzz when they are inevitably abducted. Viva la fashion!

Highest Track Marks
New Music Anticipation-O-Meter!
Eminem • We’re hoping it comes out this year so we can settle our bet on which relative he’ll fantasize about chopping up.

Pearl Jam • We get a contact high just thinking about it

Wilco • Expect, as always, a reinvention—and songs to back it up.

Interpol • Rock’s dark knights unlikely to go soft, making our eardrums wish they were never born.

Lily Allen • Adorable scamp to bring sunshine and cursing into our lives.

It's oh-so-close before we close down Maxim HQ for a couple of weeks of drunken revelry, but there's always time for a little office prank. Our tools for "Operation Shock and Haha" (just made that up; totally awesome) include the new video-enabled Blackberry Storm and a box of old snaps that happened to be hanging around in our pile of ripped-to-shreds boxes, B-rated DVDs, and six-month old fruitcake. The result: precious time before the holidays being wasted by office terrorists. Mission accomplished!

See More Here >>

Sexiest Geek Goddess
Watchmen’s Malin Akerman
The Watchmen graphic novel was pretty dark. What can we expect from the movie?
After reading the script, I was prepared for the darkness and absolutely loved that aspect of the film. It really should be rated double R—the movie is just out of control.

You play Silk Specter II, the love interest of Dr. Manhattan (played by Billy Crudup). What’s it like filming a love scene between you and a bald, glowing blue guy?
Oh, my God, Billy was wearing this white sort of one-piece pajama suit with blue lights all over it and dots all over his face and a skull cap. We have some serious scenes together, and I looked at the director like, "Are you joking? Really?" I think everyone had the same reaction to Billy. Poor Billy.

For some reason we still don’t feel sorry for him. Is Watchmen going to change the way we see superhero movies in the future?
I hope so. There are so many aspects to the movie that people can relate to. The psychology of it, like all the heroes are just regular humans going through their everyday lives. Nothing in it is typical.

Most Eagerly Awaited Supercar
The Lexus LF-A
Let’s get one thing straight here : The LF-A ain’t your orthodontist’s Lexus. If test-track spy shots are to be believed, in 2009 the luxury brand known for quiet, stately sedans may finally release its hopped-up 200-plus mph supercar, a Japanese beast destined to compete with the big boys from Italy. The supersexy, low-slung coupe should get a front-mid-mounted V-10 putting out more than 500 horses and a retractable rear wing. Early reports are setting the LF-A’s price just north of $225,000. Hey, that’s exactly the amount left in your PayPal account!

Greenest Life Recycler
Old-School Calendars New Again
Before calendars could sync with BlackBerries, they hung on walls, welcoming every month with a new swimsuit model or sports car. And then when 12 months were over, they were tossed. Well, here’s a neat tip: Calendars can only be configured in 14 different ways, and 2009 has the exact same days and dates as 1970, 1981, 1987, and 1998. So dance on over to eBay and grab yourself a year’s worth of hippie playmates, Def Leppard, Salt-N-Pepa, or the cast of Dawson’s Creek!

The Happiest Birthdays
Creepy in ’08, Just Fine in ’09
This year each of these lovely young ladies will celebrate her 18th birthday. Until that blessed day arrives, Maxim thinks of them as we would our little sister.

Jamie Lynn Spears (April 4) The younger Spears sibling has a radiant smile and the voice of a sweet songbird. And, miracle of miracles, she’s got a child! No part of us wants to see her sparsely clothed in a salacious pictorial called “Pop Stars: Proud and Pantless!”

Emma Roberts (February 10) She’s Julia Roberts’ niece, but if you ask us, Emma is the real Pretty Woman! We’d never, ever contact her management to pitch an 18th-birthday spread featuring Ms. Roberts emerging from a waterfall. Ever.

Jordan Hinson (June 4) So you’re an actress and a gymnast? Your family must be so proud! Now pardon us while we wipe out some illegal mental pictures by imagining Bruce Vilanch licking a lollipop.

Salt of Swine
Hey, ever catch yourself thinking, You know what this salt lick could use? A nice hunk of ham. Two words: Bacon Salt. The high-blood-pressure-inducing porkish delicacy’s four flavors of amazing are even available in zero-calorie, zero-fat, easily sprinkled form (and it’s somehow kosher!). That’ll do, pig; that’ll do. $5, chefsresource.com

Pop off
The EasyPop Popcorn Maker ensures a perfectly popped kernel every time. Plus, built-in moisture vents mean you won’t have to nurse steam burns during the next Gimme a Break! marathon on TV Land. $70, cuisinart.com

Bubble Fever
Good: Martini & Rossi Asti Spumante, $10
Better: Perrier-Jouët Grand Brut Champagne, $30
Best: Veuve Clicquot La Grande Dame, $145

Veg Out
Skip the supermarket spice rack and pluck fresh herbs right in your kitchen with the hydroponic AeroGarden Pro 200. This self-contained countertop garden is big enough to grow, um, vegetables. $200, aerogardenonlinestore.com


Grindhouse
Be your own sultan of schnitzel with the Waring Pro meat grinder. This statuesque stainless-steel beauty comes with two easy linking attachments, and the 450-watt motor is powerful enough to give bone and gristle a beat-down. Sausagefest! $200, chefscatalog.com

Power steering
Stop measuring your steak by the ounce—real men measure beef by the quarter ton. Save money, add flavor, and eat healthier by stepping up and buying a whole grass-fed cow. The meat is lower in fats, has higher levels of healthy omega-3s, and most of the time tastes better. Plus, these cows aren’t injected with hormones or raised in stalls, but roam in chemical-free pastures until, you know, they’re tricked into the killing barn. After you order (some farms will even let you pick the lucky cow), they’ll butcher it and ship in bulk or in regular installments. Be sure to give your delivery guy a heads-up—a beef steer will net you about 250 pounds of heart attack meat. $3,000–$5000, eatwild.com

Very little was known about the Blackberry Storm before its long-awaited debut. What kind of phone would it be? Would it flip? Slide? Cartwheel somersault? With a name like Storm (or its working title, Thunder), you would have probably been closer to the mark thinking the phone caused torrential downpours of antioxidant-infused fruit. But, it's here, folks. Yes, feast your eyes on the next gadget you'll be giving up your first born for. The Storm is Blackberry's first attempt at a touch screen...with a twist. Or, should we say, a click. (Har har!) That's right: Say hello to tactile functionality. C'mon, say hello already, damnit!

The phone's screen is supported by something funny called a "popple dome" which allows it to bounce on the spring in back of it. What's that mean for ol' Grubby Hands McGee? Well, if you have an iPhone, you know it takes quite a long time before the device recognizes when your thumb slides over the A key instead of the S key by accident. The Storm, on the other hand, will highlight the key you are touching and then, when you click the screen, will input that key. It eliminates a lot of errors when you're doing important things, like drunk-texting your friend and telling him to meet you at the "mall" instead of at the "nail."

When you've sobered up and are stuck in Archaeology class, you'll be happy to know the phone features everything you'd expect your time-wasting device to have, like wireless e-mail, Internet, organizer, a 3.2 megapixel camera, and, oh yeah, a phone, all in a compact 5.5 oz. case. You want even more? Okay, how about a video recorder and a built-in GPS and we'll throw in 15 hours of standby battery life.  And that's not all! Call in the next four seconds and we'll set you up on a date with Scarlett Johan–awww, too late. You'll just have to settle for an awesome phone, sucka!

PC You
It’s midway through freshman year, and the only thing you’ve stared at more than girls on treadmills is your laptop screen. So you might as well upgrade to a notebook with an awesome one, like Gateway’s MC series, which has an ultrabright 16-inch full-glass display. The 16:9 screen is wider than most on the market, which makes this machine ideal for multitasking—watching movies and keeping Facebook open next to a blank Microsoft Word doc. Its HDMI port will even link to your roommate’s plasma, so you can watch your GPA crumble in HD. $1,000, Gateway.com

Finger Prince
Touchscreens, like the one on the iPhone, use electrical impulses from your skin to figure out where you push. Normal gloves render your digits useless, but Dots gloves solve the problem with conductive metal specks. Pretend you’re Magneto! $15–$20, Dotsgloves.com


Vaporization Nation
Golly, the Digital Volcano Vaporizer sure looks cool. Too bad we have no idea what this German instrument does. But trust us, just rip out this page and convince the heir in your dorm to order one. $669, thevolcanovaporizer.com

Touch Down
BlackBerries were once the go-to gadget for rifling off mission-critical business e-mails at 4 a.m. With the advent of the touchscreen Storm, they will become the go-to gadget for sending mission-critical booty texts and illicit photo messages. $TBA, verizonwireless.com

You Boob Tube
The bawdy antics of your college years will never fade if you record them with the Kodak Zi6, a pocket-size cam that records up to 32 GB of video. Its futureproof 720p HD footage will even look crisp on your grandkids’ hologram walls. $180, kodak.com


Pen Ultimate
If Adderall binges aren’t cutting it as study aids, the Livescribe Smartpen is for you. It records audio as you take notes on proprietary paper, then syncs the sound with your notes. Later you can point the pen at your writing, and the professor’s rants on a phallocentric world will play back in their man-hating glory. $199, Livescribe.com

Pack In Time
Ironically, book bags have gotten bigger over the years even as our need for carrying physical books has ceased. The JanSport Heritage Series bucks the trend with compact ca. 1980 designs that’ll fit a Macbook Air and some pop rocks. $155, Jansport.com