Chris Engen

Chris Engen

Last Updated: 3/23/2009

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Gender: Male
Status: In a Relationship
Age: 29
Sign: Scorpio

City: Redondo Beach
State: California
Country: US
Signup Date: 6/15/2006
May 26, 2009 - Tuesday 

Good Day. This is the first time in my life that I address an audience so vast and varied. There are a number of heated topics that have become entwined with my recent decision to quit my job, and I feel there are a number of truths that deserve to be stated, a number of untruths that deserve to be rectified, and a few of my own ideas that, by way of circumstance, I am compelled to inject into the debate.  This is the only statement I intend to make regarding this subject. I would like first to apologize, as I feel I owe a great many of you at least that. I know that a choice like this appears weak and impulsive. Honestly, it was the last thing I ever thought I’d do - the absolute LAST thing I ever wanted.

The job has been a great challenge, and my hat is off to all my fellow actors who have mastered it so gracefully. I know a great many of you have endured far worse than what you perceive to have been my circumstance, but I do not believe that just because you have suffered a particular injustice, so too must everyone else in order to understand that injustice. I want to apologize to any of my fellow actors who I may have disappointed. I would also like to apologize to those of you who feel slighted by this choice, as I have been branded a "homophobe" by several members of the press. This is, of course, absurd and many of my dearest friends are homosexuals who would be more than happy to speak on my behalf. My decision had nothing to do with religion, or anything I learned at Bishop Montgomery High School. Bishop is a great institution of learning that encourages tolerance and acceptance of others. I do not ascribe to any one religious ideology but do value the truth that exists in them all. I think the unfortunate assumption that has been made is that Catholics are intolerant of homosexuals on the basis of their Catholicism. Intolerance of anything is a product of one’s underlying belief system as an experience of limitation. It is the line we intellectually draw within ourselves that prevents us from understanding those things we reject, because it defines the boundaries of who we are as individuals. We are what we are, but we are also NOT what we are not. Intolerance is a natural reaction that, I believe, we must understand in order to defeat. It is not a fire to be stomped out by an angry foot or extinguished by a inundating stream of media exposure. Homosexuality is a quality of beingness: one of many qualities that make up the rich diversity that humanity expresses. 

True -- I was not comfortable with many of the challenges they presented before me, but I put my head down and did my job. The fact that I had an opportunity as ostensibly attractive and lucrative as this, particularly in difficult economic times and with so many talented actors and industry professionals out of work was, of course, more than reason enough to be grateful. I considered it part of the challenge and within my job description to do the best with whatever storyline was being written for me, as I was very fortunate to be getting a storyline in the first place. I understand that the writers have a very difficult task. They accomplish more in a week than what other shows do in over a month. I never stormed off the set, nor have I stormed off any set in my 18 years of struggle as an artist. I felt generally unhappy about my contribution to the show, and had greater and greater difficulty making any sense of the challenges they were asking me to face. If that makes me a limited actor, then so be it. I was allowed ONE meeting with Maria Bell, and I called in sick ONCE in my 16 months on the show. In the end, I didn’t feel that decisions were being made in my best interests, personally or professionally.

I learned a great deal in my time there and I am eternally grateful for the challenges that enriched me as an artist and as a man. As a single father, with sole custody of a 10 year-old boy, this was neither a practical decision, nor was it an easy decision to make. I believe that as an actor, and as a human being, I deserve better than to be forced to do something that I don’t feel is right on many levels, and that should have nothing to do with the choices that other people make. My visage and my craft were being utilized to tell a story that I wasn’t inspired to tell. I have a great deal of respect for the show in general and all those hard-working people who make it possible, and it is out of respect for them and a sense of duty toward them that I asked to be removed from my duties. I know this doesn’t conform to contract stipulations and it is regrettable that my personal feelings came into conflict with that precedent, although I don’t think that would have ever been the case if what was being requested of me was not unprecedented. Ultimately, the producers were very understanding and amenable and I, in fact, worked until they told me they didn’t need me anymore. I am sure that more of my colleagues would speak on my behalf if they too weren’t afraid of the possible consequences, and I don’t blame them for that. It has been a difficult journey for me, and many others, on the road to understanding the nature of artistry and what it takes to succeed. Strength is measured by what we are willing to stand for, not by what we are willing to lie down and take. I want to thank everyone who has voiced such tremendous support and encouragement. Much love and gratitude to you all. God Bless. Namaste

Chris Engen

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All the best in your future.

Posted by Stef on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 7:15 PM
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DaViE's WiFeY
Anne Petrie Rodriguez

I had no idea you left the show.... Good Luck!
Posted by DaViE's WiFeY on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 7:20 PM
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Karrie Tucker

I wish you all the best in your future endeavors!

Posted by Karrie Tucker on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 7:25 PM
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Crazy Sue

Chris, you are young and there is a lot of life left , a lot of challenges that will arise. you have to do what you feel is the best thing for you and don't worry what other may or may not say, you are a very talented actor, and i have enjoyed watching what you have brought to the show, you made it a very interesting story line.. you will be missed, but i wish you well in all that you do. now my friend , you can take that trip to Australia... many blessing to a terrific young man.

best wishes


Posted by Crazy Sue on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 7:33 PM
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I too am a single parent, there is a double responsibility that comes with raising a child. I commend , that you had to make this very tough decision,in these tough times......Children
throw everything up to a parents face while raising them. I know I have 6. There/re are no
garantees in life, but by the same token, you don't stand on the get run-over.....

         ' You got off the tracks'  ....................kudos TO YOU................we will see more of you.....
Posted by Julie on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 8:01 PM
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You made the right choice Chris! I stand completely behind you! Y&R lost a true talent. God Bless!
Posted by Kisha on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 8:08 PM
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Janet Covington

Hello Chris! So proud of you for standing up for yourself, your beliefs, your son, your life. You have to do what is best and you are the only person that can make that decision. Most of us "celeb watchers" are aware of how the tabloids and even the associated press can distort stores such as "storming out" and "refusing" and so forth...and I think the majority of us don't believe any of that junk anyway---they write it to sell magazines. I am going to miss you SO much, you have a marvelous charisma on the screen that I enjoy watching and although I haven't liked the way Y&R changed the character of Adam to be so evil, I still enjoyed the  mystery of what was coming each day. Bottom line is, you are a splended actor and no matter what you do you will have the support of your fans who truly love you. And I am one of those. The best of luck to you and your son and in your career. God bless and keep you always. -- From Texas -- Janet
Posted by Janet Covington on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 8:47 PM
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Mary-Elizabeth Gilbert
Mary-Elizabeth Gilbert


Wishing you all the best Chris and I hope to see you in something really soon!

Much Love,


Posted by Mary-Elizabeth Gilbert on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 8:51 PM
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hey chris first off i have to say thank you for gracing us with your presents on Y&R you will be greatly missed by all .  ITA the media  can very cruel  to people and report things without kowing the facts. i wish you and your son the best of luck in the fututre i hope you find what your looking for. from rocio
Posted by ILOVECHILE on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 8:55 PM
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Michelle L

Dear Chris,
I enjoyed your portrayal of Adam very much, and must say you more than 'held your own' with a veteran like Eric Braeden. Best of luck in your future endeavors; I will miss you as Adam, but understand that you did what you felt you needed to do.
Be well & God bless.
shellz -
central ny fan
Posted by Shellz on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 9:22 PM
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I knew there was more to this.  You always seemed like a class act and I found it hard to believe everything I was reading. 

Sometimes you have to do what's best for yourself.  I quit a job 7 years ago and it was one of the best decisions I ever made.  Best of luck to you.

Posted by Cindy on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 9:27 PM
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Lana pesso

Dear Chris:

I am so proud to have corresponded with you from time to time.  I am speechless at your grace and beauty.  I am so sad that the little time (I guess) we all had to savor your beautiful, spiritual nature and unending kindness.  Please let your true friends know what wonderful things occur in your life.  You are my mentor in life - as I hope to our higher power that I can stand as tall as you.  Live and Be Well!  Lana
Posted by lana on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 9:30 PM
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Chris, I am sorry to see you go.

But i respect your decision, it was your choice and I 100% support you. I'm glad that you stood up for yourself, your son and your beliefs. You are the only Adam to me, you made adam, and you have done a wonderful job. I hope to see you soon on another show!

Best luck in the future

I hope to still keep in touch and talk with you


Posted by Stefanie on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 9:32 PM
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Chrissy B

I'll miss you as Adam but ya gotta do what ya gotta do. Good luck to you in future endeavours!

Posted by Chrissy B on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 9:36 PM
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Thank you for making a statement regarding the truth behind your departure at Y&R.  I am so proud of you for standing by your convictions. I for one, could NOT stand the storyline in which your character, Adam, was being irrevocably destroyed.  I feel you are so much more an actor than this sorry excuse for a television could ever truly showcase... I hope you find much success and happiness in the future of your career.. You have a large LOYAL legion of fans who are absolutely disgusted and devastated on your behalf. 

We love you and stand behind you 100%!!!!

Much love,

Posted by Wendi on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 9:38 PM
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sharon walker

First of all, darn those Y&R writers.   You were such an interesting character when you first appeared.  Then I don't know what the heck happened??   A total disaster.   I hope we will be able to watch you work somewhere else soon.

I admire your personal courage and character.  Please continue to update us on your future plans.....we will be watching.

Posted by sharon on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 9:57 PM
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Jonathan Waggy

Good luck in y our future endeavors. I've said it before and I'll say it again -- you are a very talented actor, Chris! All the best.


Posted by Jonathan on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 10:06 PM
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Chris, thank you so much for taking the time to give us your side.  Although your true fans, including me, knew that what was being said couldn't possibly be true, it is wonderful to see such honesty and integrity in a business such as yours.  Your talents will be missed on the show, but it is their loss.  The character of Adam has been almost completely destroyed, and I know you've done the best you could with what you were given.  But at the end of the day, it's your life and you have to live it the best way you know how.  Sometimes rules must be broken, and I am proud that you had the courage to do so even knowing there could be consequences. I wish you the best of luck in your future endeavors; I know I for one hope to see you again soon. 
Posted by Katrina on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 10:07 PM
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Ashley Wilson
Ashley Wilson


I strongly believe that anyone in your circumstances would have made the same decision you have made. I not only support your decision but understand how hard it ahd to be for you to make it. Since you are a single father of a Ten Year Old Boy. We All Face Tough Challanges and we deal with them in our own way. Your true fans will not only accept that you had to leave the show but they will support whatever you choose to do next. Good Luck to you in the future. I can honestly and Proudly call you a friend. So My friend hold your head up high and be proud of all you have accomplished. By the way what happened to your sons mother? If iit is too hard for you to talk about i understand.

Posted by Ashley Wilson on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 10:12 PM
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I wish nothing but the best for you, and will miss you on the show!

Posted by Amanda on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 10:34 PM
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Thank you for sharing this.  I totaly am in agreement with what you did and wish you the best of luck in whatever you do.
Posted by Rhonda on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 10:38 PM
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Susan Strauss


Going to miss seeing you on Y&R...I'm sure things will work out for the best and you will have a lot of success in your future acting jobs. Namaste

Posted by Susan on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 10:38 PM
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Chris, you did the right thing. I'll miss watching you on Y&R, but I wish you all the best in the future!!
Posted by Amanda on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 10:48 PM
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Cathy Samuels

With Great sadness, I respect your decision.  I know you did not come by it easily and the difficulties you have faced while trying to stay true to yourself.  I will truly miss seeing you.  I hated your story line and I think the writers so absolutely went in the wrong direction this time.
Good luck to you Chris

Posted by ~Catia~ on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 10:51 PM
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April Beats.

Ah, Chris. You have inspired me so much. In the show with your increadable acting talent, and just in those few times I spoke to you, it really helped. To know that someone has given me an opinion, someone that's in the career I want to be in, someone as knowledgeble as yourself and I dunno, I think we kinda think the same. It just means a lot. I hope we can talk again though, that was enjoyable. I understand that you've been really busy but I've written to you over the past few months and ...maybe if you wanna check your inbox for those and just ....get back to me......that would be nice, hehe

In all seriousness, I hope you find another role somewhere soon. I'll be watching.


Posted by ape45 on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 11:11 PM
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April Beats.

*April replies to herself* and in that comment I posted on your profile yesterday, sorry I said it was about your religion. I really do think you did the right thing though. Standing up or yourself. You should never do something you don't feel comfortable with. I'm proud of you (that doesn't sound right cause I'm way younger that you lol). And that sucks that the tabloids always bitch about stuff and turn everything around. Your friends and fans know the truth, remember that.

Posted by ape45 on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 11:18 PM
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Charmed Fan #1
Tiffany Diaz

Hey chris I totally get why you quit and I hate it that people are giving you such a hard time. Can't wait to see all your future projects because I loved you on yandr and think you are a great actor. I actually didn't think yandr was utilizing ur talent and I don't like the path they have put Adam on. Anyway sad that you left but u gotta do what u gotta do right so I'm just looking foward to your next project. Hopefully it's something on the big screen!
Posted by Charmed Fan #1 on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 11:16 PM
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Chris, I'll miss you immensely as I loved your "Adam", but you had to make the choice that was best for YOU.  Thank you so much for clarifying some of the untruths that are circulating out there.  I wish you the best in your career and hope to see you soon again on  my tv screen.
Posted by Betty on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 11:19 PM
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I am going to miss you sooooooo much!!!  I can't imagine anyone else playing Adam.  I respect your decision and I wish you and your son all the best.  Is there a music career ahead for you???  If your ever need someone to sing with you give me a holler!!!!  I am really going to miss you alot.......
Posted by DANNI on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 11:27 PM
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Kudos to you Chris for taking the time to address this issue.  I have nothing but positive thoughts and well wishes for your future endeavours.  I look forward to your new projects!  God Bless.

Posted by Aries on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 11:40 PM
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I just joined myspace so that I can say what a great job you did as Adam. As a father who's daughter goes to a Catholic school which encourages tolerance and acceptance of others. You are great role model for those who will be pressured into doing something they don't feel comfortable in doing. Per pressure is in school and in the work place. I told my daughter to read your comment as I did. Such great knowledge from such a young man. Thank you for taking a stand for what you believe in. God bless Larry
Posted by Larry on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 11:44 PM
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We, your fans are behind you 100%.  Good luck in all you do
Posted by THE JANESTER on May 26, 2009 - Tuesday - 11:51 PM
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So sad to see you go :( but you have your reasons. Good luck with whatever comes your way! Take care, and God Bless!!

Posted by ~*mel*~ on May 27, 2009 - Wednesday - 12:08 AM
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Chris i am sorry to see you go, I've loved watching your great work.  I wish you best of luck and will look forward to seeing your work again. Dennis
Posted by dennis on May 27, 2009 - Wednesday - 12:20 AM
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I am glad you stood up for your principles. There are too many bowing down these days to do what is popular and not so much what is right. You have my utmost respect. Luck to you.
Posted by Kevin on May 27, 2009 - Wednesday - 12:28 AM
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....when one door closes, another opens! Best of Luck to you.  Take Care!

Posted by ~~m!chelle~~ on May 27, 2009 - Wednesday - 12:29 AM
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Judy Locke- Eekhof

Hi Chris,
I am so very sorry to see you leave the show, I will miss you.
I do understand your decision to leave and I respect it....
I wish you the very best of luck for all your future endeavors.
God bless you and your family!!
Please keep in touch...
Posted by Judy on May 27, 2009 - Wednesday - 12:32 AM
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♫ ♥ Stacy ♥ ♫ /Praying for Caylee

You are to  be commended for standing up for your self. I'm going to miss you on the show but I do not like what they have done to the Adam character. Be sure to update where we can see you in the future.

Posted by ♫ ♥ Stacy ♥ ♫ /Praying for Caylee on May 27, 2009 - Wednesday - 12:35 AM
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It's okay Chris. As a mere professional and not an actor, I also faced the same dilemma in the corporate world. It is a hard decision to make, knowing your life factors that need to be considered. I thoroughly enjoyed watching you and will miss your character!  Perhaps we'll see you in something else.  There's so much I could point out that I agree with, but obviously can't on here!
Take care Chris! You'll surely be missed.
Posted by RocDahl on May 27, 2009 - Wednesday - 12:50 AM
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pamela hopkins


How awesome it is to see someone take a stand for their beliefs.  You are a GREAT actor.  You are an encouragement to others.  You have shown that there are still people with morales and standards.  I truly enjoyed watching you on Y&R.  It is their loss.  It will be your gain. For in taking a stand you will be blessed.  Much encouragement I send to you. Know that you have not  letanyone down; you have shown us what a "true man" really is.
Would love to meet you.   
Pamela and Camela       

Posted by pamela on May 27, 2009 - Wednesday - 2:11 AM
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Tess {E&L Liam}
Tess Brennan

Very well said and I hope you find exactly the role you want.  You excelled in this role and I have no doubt you will excel in others. All the best.

Posted by Tess {E&L Liam} on May 27, 2009 - Wednesday - 2:24 AM
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C & S, with puppies
Caesar and Souji Tachibana

Personally I wish you all the best

Posted by C & S, with puppies on May 27, 2009 - Wednesday - 2:30 AM
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George Ramirez
George Ramirez

im gay and i believe u chris. i sent u a message and a friend request. i need help.
Posted by George Ramirez on May 27, 2009 - Wednesday - 3:03 AM
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♥Sweet Redds♥


I commend you for standing up for your beliefs... not many people would have done what you did especially in these economic times, AND with a son to raise. You are a very talented actor who had me hating, loving, hating, loving the character of Adam. It is sad that MAB & Co. decided to take Adam in that direction. It is also sad that the media labeled you a homophobe without knowing what really happened. My hope for you is that it doesn't impact you negatively in any way. I know that you will take away many lessons from this experience and you can now move on and focus on making a better future for yourself and your son. God bless you, Chris and all the best to you in your future!!!
Posted by ♥Sweet Redds♥ on May 27, 2009 - Wednesday - 3:03 AM
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Hey Chris:

hmmmm I am not sure what I feel about this; and believe me on a daily basis I have to "act" @ work and it is tough...part of me feels like you would just be acting anyway...........with this new part....however I do see it from your point of view.  I guess the selfish part of me is thinking you should just suck it up and do the "act" as that all it would be and NOT Chris.....however I do understand.  

I am sorry to see you go........and I am sure you will be scooped up sooner than later by another soap and/or network. In any case I will stay in touch....totally as you have with me....take care and that is only my opinion. As everyday I remind myself to "act" at work despite all the opposition and negativity I get.

Reena:)  xoxo
Posted by Reena on May 27, 2009 - Wednesday - 3:25 AM
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Debbera Neilson


I will miss you for sure, but  I too respect your decision. I can imagine how difficult it is to be an artist in your Industry. You are a fine actor, and I wish you all the best!  Sometimes I think, "What are those writing thinking" sometimes it just seems ridiculous.

Love & Light

Posted by Debbera on May 27, 2009 - Wednesday - 3:26 AM
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Chris, I was sorry to hear you left Y&R -- I enjoyed your work when I got to see the show. But Im still confused. Im interested as a former soap fan (a soap columnist/journalist in fact) and TV watcher. But I write this as a homosexual man who is confused by your answer. Reading between the lines, it sounds like you wanted out because they wanted you to play gay. I didn't read where you said they wanted you to be evil, or horrible, or a murderer.
I find it disturbing that straight actors never seem to have problems being rapists, child molesters, robbers of blind people, people who would push an invalid old lady down a flight of stairs, set fire to a building with handicapped kids inside...those have ALL been done on daytime. But ask the same actor to kiss a man and they have to do soul searching.
You must understand why as a gay man I find that astonishing and sad we live in a world where you would have to make a choice that you found compromising for simply displaying love or affection. In your future, when you are asked to blow people up, kill a bus filled with nuns, commit adultery, murder, steal or any number of sinful acts (as specified by your religion) I hope we are living in a society where you will feel more comfortable asking the director "where do I stand in this scene?" rather than taking a stand, that in my opinionl, is morally ambiguous at best. Thanks for listening. Good luck in your future endeavors.
Posted by Alan on May 27, 2009 - Wednesday - 3:33 AM
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Alan, with all due respect, had you been watching the show,
you would have realized that Chris wasn't objecting to playing
a gay man.  It seems apparent, he was objecting to discovering that
the character that he had been cast to play, the one he had brilliantly created,
the one who had been created irrevocably heterosexual,
is suddenly, inexplicably, and unjustifiably homosexual. 
For an actor who has been playing a character for over a year,
and knows him entirely, this is a nightmare. 

And for an actor it is a no win situation.  The audience feels the
irrationality in the sudden turn and mostly judges the actor as being bad. 
If you walk, you certainly lose the ultimate luxury for an actor,
which is an ongoing paycheck, but if you don't, you risk your
future as an actor.  If Chris hadn't left, he wouldn't have been
remembered for the year of the brilliant acting and intriguing
character.  He would be yet another hapless victim of when Soap
powers that be, demolish a character past the point of no return, turn
him ridiculous, then kill him off.

And Chris has a 10 year old child.  He appears to be a highly
intelligent and thougtful person.  He knows that everything he does
and says has an effect. 

Speaking only for myself, I feel insulted and infuriated when shows
make the choice to simply decide to turn a longtime heterosexual character gay. 
There is no integrity in the choice.  Gay characters deserve to be developed as
whole and complex as those who aren't.

I'm sorry that hearing the media tidbits of Chris Engen's story made
you feel badly, Alan.  It so saddens me that the knee jerk reaction these
days, is that people are homophobic.  It baffles me that someone
who feels the sting of judgemental people, can be so utterly judgemental yourself,
without really knowing the complexity of the action Chris has taken.

I was so struck by reading Chris' statement that I too felt compelled
to join My Space to come here and respond.  I don't like to believe this,
but maybe it takes another actor to really understand the untenable
position in which he was put. I'm envious of his courage.  I wish
I had had the same in similar situations.

Good luck to Chris and to you also, Alan.

Posted by Gilleigh on May 30, 2009 - Saturday - 8:47 AM
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What he said! Very, very well put.

Posted by Phoebe on May 27, 2009 - Wednesday - 10:15 PM
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Billy Vick

You really expressed by sentiments exactly.  I adore Chris as a performer, and I think as an employee, you do what is written for you.  No one these days believes that just because you play a murderer, you are a murderer, or that if you play a gay character it means you are 100% definitely gay.  The soaps are slowly dwindling away, as are good jobs.  I hate for Chris to have given up steady work over this issue.  How else should the public interpret his decision?  As you stated, he apparently does not have problems with "other sinful" behavior, only the ones he choses to have a problem with.  It hurts me because I truly love Chris as a performer, and will miss him terribly.  I wish he was more open-minded.  Sorry if this offends his supporters, because I have always supported him 110%.
Posted by Billy on May 27, 2009 - Wednesday - 9:52 PM
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