Cinematical

In this week's Whip It, director-star Drew Barrymore shines a loving light on one of the most brutal and devilishly entertaining sports around: roller derby. If you've ever seen a derby match, you know what I'm talking about: 60 minutes of fast-skating, bruising action between players with names like Axles of Evil and Juana Beat'n. In celebration of the badass beauties of the roller derby world and their Whip It counterparts – including Ellen Page as "Babe Ruthless," Kristin Wiig as "Maggie Mayhem," Barrymore as "Smashley Simpson," and Zoe Bell as "Bloody Holly" – here's a Cinematical Seven remembering some of the scariest, fiercest movie characters to ever lace up a pair of roller skates.


1. Rollergirl - Boogie Nights


In Paul Thomas Anderson's Boogie Nights, Rollergirl (Heather Graham) is a fixture in Jack Horner's porn family who's up for anything but never, ever takes off those skates. She's young, blonde, and always ready like Freddie for some fun – but don't cross Rollergirl, or you might get a face full of wheels in return. When one unlucky frat boy insults her – and her fine feature films – he gets a sidewalk beating from Jack (Burt Reynolds) before Rollergirl glides over to give him the business end of her silver '70s four-wheelers.

If you've been arguing with your friends and family about the arrest and detainment of Roman Polanski in Switzerland last week, don't feel bad -- you're not the only one with an opinion. There's a debate brewing in Hollywood over the acclaimed director and his current legal predicament, and everyone has jumped into the fray. Polanski fled from the US after a conviction for unlawful sexual intercourse with a minor back in 1978, and with his recent arrest some of the biggest names in Hollywood have been publicly showing support. Recently, filmmakers like Michael Mann, Darren Aronofsky, Terry Gilliam, and Woody Allen (ahem, yes, even Woody Allen) signed a petition demanding the filmmaker's release from a Zurich jail. On the other hand, there is a very real possibility that not everybody is on board the love train, and the problem is that those people aren't talking.

Hollywood is a business, and just like in any other business, reputation can be everything. If you think of Hollywood as the world's biggest high school, then you can see how nobody wants to be excluded from the 'cool table' -- and it doesn't help that the pro-Polanski faction has Woody Allen and Martin Scorsese, and the opposition has Sherri Shepherd and 'Nellie Olsen'. In a piece for the LA Times, independent producer Melissa Silverstein said, "I think people are afraid to talk in Hollywood. They are afraid about their next job." Sure, that might sound slightly paranoid, but power players like Harvey Weinstein are writing op-eds in support of the director, so maybe she's not completely off the mark.

After the jump: making excuses and Hollywood vs. Middle America...

I am obsessed with all things even vaguely related to The Mighty Boosh, a bizarre comedy from the UK that features besties Howard Moon, a gloomy jazz fan, Vince Noir, an androgynous mod, Naboo the shaman, and Bollo the talking gorilla as they go on "a journey through time and space." (Incidentally, the DVDs of the show are finally available for region 1 DVD players!)

There have been rumors of a Boosh movie, and Noel Fielding is also in a bizarro fake documentary called I Spit on Your Rave as the Zombie King. (It's described as "a mockumentary by director Chris Boyle about the first post-apocalypse zombie music festival" and is due out in 2010.) But meanwhile, I'll sate my ravenous hunger for more of the Boosh crew with their new movie, Bunny and the Bull. Boosh director Paul King wrote and directed the screenplay, and fans will be excited to see Boosh regulars Julian Barratt (Howard Moon) and Noel Fielding (Vince Noir) among the cast, as well as Simon Farnaby, who plays Bunny, and Richard Ayoade. It sounds as bizarre and hard to describe as The Mighty Boosh, based on the write-up on the TIFF website.

Here's a quick look at what's opening in limited release this weekend. If they're not playing where you live, keep an eye out as they make the rounds. And if all else fails, there's always DVD....

More Than a Game (pictured) is a documentary about basketball phenom LeBron James and four of his Akron, Ohio, high school teammates. Reviews are about evenly split so far, though none are terribly negative. I get the feeling that fans of James and/or basketball will love it while those with a more casual interest might find it lacking. Playing in L.A., New York, and several theaters in the Akron area (nice touch!). The official website has a schedule of when it's opening in other cities.

Afterschool premiered at Cannes last year and has subsequently played at several other festivals, including South By Southwest. It's a drama about students at a New England prep school in the aftermath of a tragedy involving some of their classmates, and how they retreat into YouTube and the Internet to deal with their feelings. About three-fourths of the reviews so far are positive, with critics calling it a sobering, honest look at 21st-century youth. Playing in New York City now.

A Beautiful Life is about a runaway teenage girl and an illegal-immigrant teenage boy whose paths cross in Los Angeles. It's based on a play called Jersey City. Bad news, though: All six of the reviews posted so far are negative: melodramatic, heavy-handed, poorly acted, etc., etc. Playing in New York, L.A., Chicago, and San Francisco.

By: Monika Bartyzel, reprinted from the Toronto International Film Festival 9/12/09

This is the dark comedy that Joel and Ethan Coen have been working towards. A Serious Man is the culmination of their lives, reminiscent both of their own suburban childhoods in the '60s, and of their cinematic successes over the last twenty-five years. It grabs the magic of local flavor and charm we saw in Fargo with a cast widely filled with unknown names (that pack as much of a cinematic punch as any star-studded roster you can think of), to the rapidly escalating drama of Burn After Reading. A Serious Man is cohesive and slick from stem to stern. It's serious about the craft of storytelling, both in form and function, with a dedication to characterization, pitch-perfect performances, and a cinematic backdrop that is both severely nostalgic and completely immersive.

In many ways, A Serious Man is a modern-day Candide. But rather than a hapless hero who is continually undaunted by the neverending drama that plagues him, the Coens' hero isn't a ray of sunshine. Larry Gopnik (perfectly embodied by renowned stage actor Michael Stuhlbarg) is a man utterly at a loss to explain his life's severe turn for the worse; he is a man desperate for answers. The classic Candide optimism shines down in the form of the rabbis he consults with as he tries to make sense of things. But rather than sage advice, they deliver wholly inadequate responses to life's trauma that don't speak at all to the nature of Larry's life.

Usually, soap operas provide the gateway to bigger gigs. One could go on and on about the big-time names that popped up in the overly dramatic worlds of the soaps. Brad Pitt was in Another World; Kevin Bacon drank a lot on Guiding Light; Leonardo DiCaprio spent time on Santa Barbara; and Meg Ryan dealt with life As the World Turns. General Hospital alone let loose Demi Moore, Rick Springfield, John Stamos, Jack Wagner, and Mark Hamill. And now the famous hospital in Port Charles is attracting Hollywood talent.

Collective jaws dropped yesterday as word hit that James Franco would be picking up a guest spot on the popular ABC soap General Hospital. We're not talking a 1-off appearance. SoapNet reports that he'll start on November 20 and be there for a number of weeks, making life difficult for Jason Morgan. But that's not the kicker. They claim Franco was the one who came up with the idea. (Although that could just be misinterpreting a quote expressing the surprise that someone of his "caliber would choose to spend some of his valuable time" on the soap.)

None of this makes sense. There's been a lot of chatter about the struggles of soap operas these days, so it's not exactly an irresistible sort of gig. While the economy is bad, Franco has been busy with a lot of projects, so he can't be strapped for cash. So what makes a popular Hollywood actor decide to (maybe) approach a soap opera and sign on for a pretty long stint? There has been mention of Franco having the same manager as Steve Burton (Jason Morgan), but that's a pretty weak reason.

Are we witnessing a new, and baffling, trend?

Welcome back to another edition of insert caption -- the game that's, well, more than a game ... (okay that one was too easy). Last week we asked you to whip up some captions for a photo from that new coming-of-age flick starring Ellen Page and a pair of badass rollerskates called Whip It. Congrats go out to our three winners for successfully pushing and shoving their way to the top.

1. "With Ellen Page as the lead, critics were extremely surprised at the success of the new hit show on Broadway: Peter Pan - The Full Contact Musical." -- Evan T.

2. "Her teammates began to notice that Ellen's fish grew larger every time she told the story." -- James H.

3. "This is a never before seen casting session photo of Ellen Page trying to convince Sam Raimi, et al. that she would make a perfect Green Goblin." -- Stephen C.

See full image and all captions


This week we're running up and down the court with basketball's golden boy, LeBron James, who stars as himself in a very entertaining coming-of-age documentary about friendship and overcoming adversities in order to achieve your goals. It's called More Than a Game, and it's in theaters now -- so check it out. In the meantime, the b-ball haters behind our three favorite captions this week will fast-break away with one More Than a Game poster, one More Than a Game soundtrack, one More Than a Game T-shirt and one More Than a Game calendar. So put on your game face and sound off below ...



Read the official rules for this contest

Will a video game movie based on a game with no characters or storyline whatsoever be more successful than a Max Payne or Tomb Raider? Fox and EA are going to give it a shot and find out, as Variety reports that they are setting up Spore as a feature film. Chris Wedge is attached to direct, with Greg Erb and Jason Oremland writing the screenplay.

Spore is a colorful, family friendly game that allows you to build a variety of fanciful creatures. But perhaps most notably, it allows you to evolve them. Your creatures start out as microscopic organisms, develops into a complex animal, and becomes a social and intelligent creature. You help guide its society from a primitive stage all the way to space travel. It's a very organic game not only in its single-player conception, but because it allows you to share your creatures and your worlds with other gamers, and create a comprehensive universe at the Sporepedia. Fittingly, the Sporepedia acted as kind of historical documented, and recorded everything glorious and dubious about the player created worlds.

So, when a game is all about playing Supreme Being, how do you make a movie out of it? Wedge isn't sure yet, but he feels the property is rich in possibility. "I'm always looking for unique worlds to go to in animation. From every perspective -- visually, thematically and comedically -- the world of Spore provides the potential to put something truly original on the screen." It might just create something quite original off, if they kept a bit of evolution in its storyline. Haven't you always wanted to see a cartoon picketed by Kirk Cameron?

Warm, witty, and wise are all words I would happily use to described The Invention of Lying. Ricky Gervais, who co-wrote and co-directed with Matthew Robinson, stars as a screenwriter in an alternate universe. (Jennifer Garner, Jonah Hill, Rob Lowe, and Louis C.K. also star.) It's a world that resembles our world, except that everyone is compelled to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, at all times -- not simply be honest when asked, but volunteer all manner of unflattering information. It's a cute premise that allows the dark, droll humor of Gervais to prevail, resulting in a very funny movie that eventually morphs into a treatise -- some would say a broadside, but I think it's far too kind and empathetic -- on religion, spirituality, and the importance of leading a "good" life.

Here's the rub: Gervais' character is also a wee bit hypocritical. (OK, a whole lot.) As he admits in the film, he's a middle-aged, overweight, snub-nosed little man, not much in the physical looks department. His charming personality, keen intelligence, and acerbic humor all serve to balance the books nicely as an overall package, but not in the eyes of Jennifer Garner, who plays a shallow-minded woman. All she wants is a good match in the gene pool, and Gervais doesn't measure up. So why does he pursue her?

It's no Citizen Kane. It's not meant to win awards. I watch movies to enjoy them. These standbys are frequently trotted out before us fuddy-duddy critics whenever we decide that a movie ostensibly meant to be two hours of pure mindless fun simply isn't very good at doing just that. More often than not, it seems that films are championed for their laziness, their relentless adherence to formula, and rarely do these formulas serve a story that's worth more than the sum of its beats. School of Rock managed to work wonders with its wholly predictable plot; I'd vouch for Fever Pitch in much the same way. And joining their ranks of surprisingly satisfying comedies is Drew Barrymore's directorial debut, Whip It, a coming-of-age tale fused with an underdog sports story that hits all the expected developments with unexpected personality and grace.