From Encyclopedia Dramatica

Riley; sporting his best look and a product placement.

Riley34470 (RileyNRA), AKA Michael Eugene Riley, or Pillow Fucker for short, is a horny bottom boy who is going down in the anals of internet history as the first Indian faggot to lose his arrows over being ruined by the hate tribe: Anonymous. In a distant past, Riley made his debut when prehistoric transgender faggot GayDiamond roamed the land searching for the remains of Matthew Shepherd's maggoty corpse.

Blessed with a ridiculously kosher jewnose and a delusion of grandeur that would make Kanye West unable to let you finish, the veracity of Riley's lack of social skills is exemplified by early forum posts he made envying the accomplishments of other people's fathers, because the only accomplishment his father was responsible for is dying of a cancerous tumor.

Wearing his trusty war bonnet, Michael Riley hit the ground running on the Ocala Town forum, where he posted under the username TheUntetheredSoul, made obvious by his jew-nosed tiki statue profile icon.

Use scrollbar to see the full image

The warning his neighbor gave him fell on deaf ears, and a giant nose

A Lolcow Under The Radar

Riley stains some shorts with his comeuppance.

Looking for a gard cock.

Riley, or Chief Worksnomore, as his friends call him; went beyond the call of duty to transcend the definition of antisocial. He won the title of big nosed Jew through his nonstop complaining about taxation and the government's unfair persecution of fellow Indians, while being unemployed and collecting welfare from the same institution he aptly despised. This delicious hypocrisy is a recurring theme in the Michael Riley universe, as well as autofellatio, which is only proverbial, as he's limited by a stout chode. The way Riley gravitates contempt toward himself is often imitated but never replicated by trolls everywhere.

	“   Don't make me put you name address, and pics of you home here.You stupid *** dinosaur, your computer may get a virus on this message board be careful.. I hear there is one out there on this message board. Or at least that's what my "queer" computer software is telling me. It starts at about 45.00 an hour to have you puter worked on so be careful how you use your computer Just some friendly advice. I've warned a few about it, it your not one, **** off.   „   —Riley34470 on being butthurt   “   Being part Native American , albeit a small part, it is a shame you diminish the Otoe Indian Tribe using thier name, Riley please go back to mer2000.   „   — pilotbob   “   Dang...I thought you died.   „   —ItsMeTalkingToYou   “   You have yet to explain why You and your camera were outside the courthouse.You do state however, that your taxes payed for it, appearantly your not employed right now. Why don't you spend your time doing something useful for our community such as volunteering your spare time a local soup kithen or boys and girls club.   „   —kboston8   “   Don't worry bout trying to hate on me in this local forum. I deal with Haters on an International basis on all my sites and you people are small time. The video's out there mission accomplished.   „   —Riley showing off his e-fame   “   You must have Brittney Spears disorder!   „   —InternetBandit   “   The more you run my name down it increases my exposure.I love it! More hate comments!!!! Please :-)   „   —Riley34470 asking for it.   “   Most of us have been able to see his "true colors" for a very long time. Perhaps his last statement should drive him to some introspection where he will discover the root cause of his situation.The problem is that our society has taught him to believe that there is no personal responsibility and he can ALWAYS find someone else to blame for his current situation.   „   —Bucsfan41 Previous Quote  |  Next Quote

Ostracized by the members of the Ocala town forum, he migrated to the land of Jewtube despite his genetic predisposition to cancer, where he encountered Gaydiamond and an army of cyberterrorists who were not pleased with Chief Worksnomore interfering with the burning of Gaydiamond's trailer, and proceeded to take Riley's land away and rape his people.

Pillow Faggotry

You're lucky I even performed for you bastards.

Riley's archived Gay.com profile tells us he's an Action Sex aficionado.

Anonymous used the spider expertise of Google to reveal Riley's trail of tears. His clever screenname Riley34470 turned out to be a concoction of his last name and zip code, which was conveniently linked to an embarrassing gay.com profile. Michael denied this closet faggotry at first, right before deleting the profile, but not before wholeheartedly embracing it and calling Anonymous a gang of faceless cowards. After a second examination, Anonymous Pilgrims feathered their way into Michael's Xtube profile and found a video of him getting it on with a pillow. Srsly. Some argue that pillow fucking is simply Michael's way of showing the man he's not a coward, as it takes a brave Indian faggot superstar to humiliate himself merely for other's amusement.

Edit Tits

Typical Application.

Being a well-known faggot indian superstar also means having a well-known speech impediment. Riley unintentionally coined the phrase "Edit Tits" while making a video response. Some argue that not being granted enough government handouts and unemployment checks prevented Riley from lerning2grammar. Nevertheless, this argument is void because his father Dennis left him at least 100 casinos once he choked on the cancerous tumor that was his son's dick raping his throat after being mistaken for a cushion.

The Demise of Dennis

Dennis Eugene Riley was Michael's illegitimate father. Unlike his parasitic son, he had a business crafting and selling bongo drums. According to Michael he passed away from a cancerous tumor, but scholarly Anons have developed many alternate theories of equal hilarity.

Throat Rape

The first theory is the familiar Throatrape Theory. Dennis was sound asleep in his teepee as Chief Worksnomore waddled drunkenly into his den. Unable to find his pillow, Michael found the next best thing. The allure of Dennis' drooling mouth excited Riley as it seeped onto his dear pillow. Riley viewed this as a potential quasi-threesome, with a touch of incest, and satisfied himself by profusely raping the shit out of his father's throat. Dennis was unable escape the clutches of his pillow fucking son, and perished in a horrorsome nightmare where he repeatedly choked on a baby carrot laced in ranch dressing.

Disappointing Situation

The Disappointing Situation theory insists that Dennis took his own life after becoming excessively disappoint with his son. Evidence supporting this theory has been collected in other real-world conditions. This theory implies Dennis was an honorable man and died to preserve the dignity of his tribe, regrettably leaving his son with no more than two of his casinos.

Troll's Remorse

Unlike the Disappointing Situation theory, the Troll's Remorse theory states that Dennis was an evil, heartless man who beat Michael from a young age all the way into adulthood. Apart from not leaving Riley any casinos in the will, the bastard also sexually molested little Michael when he was a baby, but this had no severe mental impact on Michael, because even as a toddler he enjoyed sodomy and any white fabric that represented a common pillow. As his faggy son grew older, Dennis perceived the causality of Riley's increasingly faggy behavior to the abusive acts of rape he was subjected to, even though they were probably helpful preventative medicine, and decided to end his life by arrowing himself through the temple out of guilt.

Man's Best Friend

Riley, being the original human being he is, once owned a dog by the exotic name of Dawga. Luckily for Dawga, it was poisoned shortly after Dennis' death, and was never raped again. There are also rumors that Riley has a cat. The cat's name and virginity can not be confirmed at this point in time.

Butthurt

Not even the ghost of Dennis can break the invincible Riley

Riley's passive aggressive behavior is a good indication of his butthurt. He often files illegal copyright claims on parody videos and remixes that use his huge-nosed likeness, after announcing that they don't bother him at all. Trolling Riley is easier than denying a nigger equal opportunity employment, because he just doesn’t know when to quit. He’ll stay in a stickam room full of lulzers so he can appear as an internet tough guy who has better things to do than be bothered by, say, all the people on the internet calling him a pillow fucking faggot.

While lacking true rage in response, Riley’s facials are similar to those of a public speaker who gets an itch in his asshole during a presentation, or a gigolo eating pussy from the fish market. Ironically, both are things Riley wouldn’t be caught dead doing, because he’s a gay jobless Indian pillow fucker with no social skills. The essence of his butthurt is so potent that even Youtube mods trolled Riley into oblivion, making no mystery out of why he refers to himself as a bottom boy.

A vigilant Harry from Youtube quickly responded:

Rick was not pleased, he wrote his e-pal Harry an threatening email:

And was subsequently B&.

Brb Doxed

With his name, address, and pictures of his home on the internet, Riley drinks his 40oz knowing he can't afford the $45 an hour service fee for his soon to be virus-infected puter

One fine day, Riley was comfortably fagging it up in his Stickam chatroom talking about the paparazzi. Playing the role bestowed upon them, the paparazzi scrambled, snapped some pictures of his soon-to-be-foreclosed residence, and called his phone for an interview. Suddenly his phone began having technical difficulties and could not be reached. Sympathizing with the abominable pillow fucker, the paparazzi ordered Riley some all-topping Pizza and chocolate pie. He fed the dessert course to Dawga while pondering how somebody can get the dox of a man who only posted his first name, last name, and zip code on every website he ever visited.

Eventually, everybody involved in the shitstorm had their greedy Indian beating hands on Riley's dox, including some IRL enemies who held their own unique butthurt grudges, notably; a knuckle dragging whore who Riley refers to as Squirrel, and his own mother; who holds the same personality traits as the latter but doesn't shower. The drama between these rednecks resulted in Riley putting on his moccasins and venturing on his way to Amarillo in order to escape an arrest warrant for possession of narcotics, and then fleeing again to Oklahoma after he ran into George and Shirlanne, two more IRL trolls who came buckets at the sight of Pillowfucker's dox.

Cool story bro

Brb Hacked

Niggerhat hacker Rebekkah pops a cap in Riley's bandwidth, looking suave like shampoo

After a year of complaining to the Youtube editors, he recovered his suspended Riley34470 account and created a new account: Riley34470FL. These two accounts would become vital to his growing fame and popularity, mainly because they were hacked within a day by his sister arch nemesis Bekkah, who took computer science III after she discovered that Riley was going to buy her social security number and sell it to illegal immigrants. Bekkah would go on to litter his login information across the internets, along with his uncrackable master passphrase:

In response to his seven passwords being strewn about like sacred arrowheads, Anonymous immediately proceeded to raid and pillage his MySpace, Facebook, and YouTube, documenting the entire process and releasing it in a convenient package for the masses to download. After countless spoilers and trade secrets were revealed, the rape brought upon Riley was too strong even for his gaping bottom boy asshole, and he receded like his tiny penor into a vegetative state. Unfortunately for the internet, this only lasted two weeks. Potato nose created another Yahoo and Youtube account, claiming that he is “hacker-proof” since 2007.

He couldn't have done it it without Le Shizzle!

Riley deviates from Fagstone's theory to reach his own bold assertion.

Fun Pack 2009

Regardless of who took Chief Worksnomore's land, the result was a godly compilation of lulz, goatse, and jenkem. During their tour of duty, fearless anons traveled afar to distant IP addresses, fighting for their god given right to colonize Riley's Internets. The first muskets aimed at the village of Myspace.

• Get your own Riley Fun Pack here!

Myspace

Friends and family were entitled to the truth.

Excuse me wtf is this?

Exposed.

DISREGARD THAT I SUCK COCKS.

Facebook

Oh Lawdy

First wave of goatse. Followed by weird nasty gross pics. Has guise look at this new trick I learned with my butthole. Everyone is tagged, noone is safe.

THIS IS AN OUTRAGE! Everyone is tagged again. They did his Myspace too! But the burrito didn't agree. The final solution.

Youtube

I put on my hide and feather hat

Before? After? Subscribers couldn't tell either. It's OK, I've got Zone Alarm. Technology is there enemy. Riley's massive block list.

Riley's YouTube background on Riley34470FL after the hack.

Improving tech allows Riley to become aroused while Fagstone is gargling his tiny dick.

Not Hacked

Even though most of Riley's personal websites and passwords were leaked and raped, two managed to survive.

Secondlife

Riley's Secondlife avatar.

Little is known about Riley's Secondlife account other than the fact it wasn't hacked. He is also in contact with Fagstone on it seeing as they both play. You can help by crashing his sim with extreme predjucide by flooding it with pillow cubes.

Stickam

Even though Riley's Stickam wasn't hacked, he was given the banhammer after a certain individual took the opportunity to spread his ass cheeks in Riley's chatroom while he was featured.

Ickeriss bans Riley by showing his asshole.

Fortunately for the internet, he never got his account back.

Damage Control

While the hackpack was distributed to all sectors of the internet, Riley thought long and hard about what could be done to extinguish the firestorm of lulz and hysteria manifested at his expense. He decided to do the smart thing, and to this very day denies having his accounts compromised. Abiding by this fallacious thinking, the blame is to be placed squarely on him, for revealing the contents of his private life to the public's weary, freckle-less eye.

“	I've never been hacked. Thanx 4 the luv tho!	„
— RileyNRA on doing it wrong

To paraphrase, the self-proclaimed public figure Michael Riley enlightened the internet of his redneck trailer trash drama. He screencapped his own e-mails and PMs, along with his hacked profiles, leaked his passwords all over the internet, and then complained about it on the one account he had left before voluntarily surrendering it to the Internet Hate Machine. It makes about as much sense as fucking a pillow and calling your mother an incubator, but that's never stopped him before. A large amount of data were accumulated and organized into a list of trivial facts.

Trivia

• Has been accused of molesting children.
  

  

  Riley loves children.
• Believes Anonymous is a series of sockpuppets
• His name is NOT Rick
• Is on his way to Amarillo
  

  

  His Major Break is still in the making.
• Was an EMT and drove an ambulance for five years while living in Ocala.
• Has a wrestling fetish.
• Suffers from sleep apnea
• Is adopted.
• Responded to a Nigerian 419 scam in the hopes of finding his real father.
• Got his door kicked down by a 17 year old, who stole his 52 inch TV.
• Is being given heads up about his mom.
• Named his dog Dawga.
• Is a flaming bottom-boy.
• Practices Christianity.
• Poisoned his dog Dawga.
• Owns a Finding Nemo blanket that he humps his pillow on.
• Has crossed swords with GayDiamond.
• Is being watched by a probation officer.
• Is still waiting for a big break in his acting career.
• Has hit the block button over 118 times.
• Is a 38 year old virgin (unless you count anal).
• Argues with children on the internet.
• Will buy your social security number and sell it to beanerfolk.[1]
• Has a beautiful eye freckle.
• Dreams of following in his father's footsteps.
• Drinks Gayfuel religiously.
• Is famous on the internet.
• Has made sock accounts to 5 star his own videos and comment positively on his own channel.
• Is banned for life from Bed Bath & Beyond.

YouTube Reactions

The typical reaction.

	Previous Video  |  Next Video

Riley chillin' out maxin' relaxing all cool and molesting some children outside of the school.

	“   His nose was punched in when he tried to raep kids.   „   —Psycatalyst   “   he thinks everyone is a sockpuppet because he can't imagine more than one person might think he is wrong. He blocked my account from leaving him messages, I bet he leaves a few for me though.   „   —Hollybear1980   “   Oh god I lol'd hard.   „   —expectanon1   “   Riley34470 you should stop making attemps of trying to win an argument with minors thus causeing you to look more like a fuck bag then you already are take this advice and jump infront of a train and save humanity   „   —munkey357   “   Riley is a pillow fucking faggot.   „   —lifterlegandpoker   “   did they have nice pillows in the year 2065????, lol, you wont post my last comment because its the truth and "it" will get mad, lol, riley im proud of you your only a half blocking comment fag these days and let me know when we can wrestle in our tidy whiteys and put it on the internet, lol   „   — MsMargiesAssPains   “   Riley fucks pillows.   „   —s0ckpuppet9   “   That's what he doesn't understand. Some people think that this youtube drama crap is exactly that, and to participate in it is undignified. He thinks that making a video makes him better than others. What a moron.   „   —AntiMatterDeath   “   Riley, WHY are your pubic hairs all over your pillow? Why do your pillows smell of crotch rot?   „   — GDTransformer3   “   hes back from the suspension pokeball   „   — WolfeeRedhead   “   oh yeah...our old friend is back. BRB securing my pillows   „   —TheBeeOBee   “   I shat bricks.   „   —ieffinlold Previous Quote  |  Next Quote

White Knighting and Brown Nosing

Every once a blue moon, Riley will attempt to "warn" people about the dangers of the internet. In one of his warnings, he even goes as far as to warn Darksidered992 about "Kick a Ginger Day" in a possible attempt to get the trolls away from him.

	Previous Video  |  Next Video

Current Whereabouts

Like every other Native American, Riley is a vagrant with no permanent residence. ITT Tech alumni rekindle hope in their lives looking at his education level and social class. However, their flame of hope is short lived because Riley is financially supported by the government and his big-nosed tribe of teepee tipping Jews. He currently resides in Oklahoma having gay sex with his brother and other interested tops he encounters via Craigslist. The sodomy is usually done on his family's ranch, and includes his grandmother, grandfather, and any other farm animals living on the premises.

Gallery of Injun

RileyNRA's claim of being 'hacker proof since 2007'.	Riley's archived Gay.com profile. He paid money to have it deleted.	Tiger Woods and Obama were in Riley's video?	Riley's archived XTube profile.
Riley's XTube profile when he put a child's picture up to hide the evidence.	He removed MindDuel's picture on his XTube profile and asks for trolls to leave him alone: "Now leave me alone. You know who you are."	Riley hugs his beloved feathery sex toy.	Enough said.

Related Articles

• GayDiamond
• Sharolaid
• Faggotry
• Retard
• Butthurt
• Fail
• Trying Too Hard
• Billoon45
• Attention Whore
• Internet Tough Guy
• Ruination

Resources

• Riley's NEW HACKER-PROOF YouTube
• [http://www.youtube.com/Riley34470 Riley's original YouTube. Hacked.
• [http://www.youtube.com/Riley34470FL Riley's YouTube after banhammer. Also hacked.
• The actual Rileypack.
• Riley's resume as seen in the Rileypack.
• YouTube account that hosted and distributed the Fun Pack.
• Riley's XTube (beware of the immense faggotry) Baleeted.
• Mirror of Riley's fap and pillow videos.
• Riley's Stickam.
• Riley's Snapvine
• Ask him questions?
• His Secondlife account, Aiden Tigerpaw.

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