Yahoo! Answers
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
"Yahoo! Answers" is the correct answer to the question "Education" on all job application forms. |
Yahoo! Answers is a modern-era Indian reserve of sorts for suicide hopefuls, teenagers, retards, americunts, Eurofags (Yahoo! Answers UK), and parents shocked to find their 4-year-old children masturbating with the dog to roam wild. Unsurprisingly, a large population of trolls has also reached Y!A. It is the largest idiot breeding ground on the internets, followed by YouTube and MySpace, which are tied. Let's face it, Yahoo Answers is asking for it. Yahoo's famed answerers either respond with clever replies such as 'Good question!' to gain more points, which a recent study proved is the cause of AIDS, or with law-abiding liberal fucktard views that Michael Moore would be proud of. In response to the perfectly reasonable question of "Where can I download my faggot emo music for free?" retards will explain how doing so is morally wrong and is STEALING from the MUSIC INDUSTRY! These faggots are always basement dwelling virgins. Other such reasonable questions, such as a closet homosexual asking how to hack into his fat girlfriends chat logs to see if she would ever dream of cheating on him with that bad boy cool dude when he is 'such a nice guy!' are responded to similarly: [1]
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How to Play
Yahoo Answers works on a "point" system, where the more points you accumulate the more special yahoo abilities you access. This essentially making it an MMO, where most people grind question so that they can level up. You gain points from answering questions and voting for the best answer, lose them by asking questions and deleting your own answer. There are four main professions that a Yahoo! Answers player can choose from.
- Grinder - people who only answer questions to use up their daily limit, so that they can level-up the fastest. Typically, this means answering questions with inane comments such as "maybe" or "I don't know". These posts make up the majority of most answer threads.
- Spammer - someone who copy-pastes gigantic 20-paragraph identical responses on all questions of a similar topic, usually relating to how great Mormonism/Christianity/Atheism/Scientology/Eugorinalism is, without any real relevance to the question. Almost universally ignored.
- Troll - Here either to tell you how stupid you are when you ask a question, or to ask a stupid question in order to waste your time and piss you off. The only real use of answers, other than to produce tons of links to your website.
- Woman - These type of people ask idiotic questions, and most of them are not aware of a website called google and rather have questions answered by 12 year olds. Or Grinders.
Other strategies
- Gamer/exploiter - Unlike the "grinder", the exploiter differentiates between effectiveness and efficiency. Someone who archives answers to the most frequently asked questions (mFAQ) in a note-taking computer program in order to cut and paste the answers as soon as they appear on a category feed. The gamer/exploiter type tries to optimize the best-answer quotient. He's efficient in the Yahoo! Answers imaginary world, but a complete and total idiot when it comes to efficiency in IRL situations, since he wastes so much time on Yahoo! Answers doing repetitive work for the "Web 2.0" plantation, with no compensation whatsoever.
- Yahoo! Answers Team sycophant - This is someone who is brain-washed by "Web 2.0" utopianism, praises the Yahoo! Answers Team, the Yahoo! Answers service, or the "Web 2.0" mentality in general, uses Yahoo! Answers and "Web 2.0" vocabulary according to protocol, and thinks that the Internet runs on software, not hardware or money. A typical comment by such a user is he's addicted to Yahoo! Answers, that Yahoo! Answers is the best thing since sliced bread, yada, yada… As the good sycophant he is, he reports all lulzy posts as inappropriate. He's "politically correct" (does not tolerate anti-Jewish, racially aware or nationalistic comments) and antilulzy. Like the gamer/exploiter, a complete and utter moron who likes to be exploited by the owners of the "Web 2.0" plantation.
- Weight Loss Guru - Answer every weightloss question with "cocaine. lots and lots of cocaine."
In summary, Yahoo! Answers is exactly like 'Whose Line Is It Anyway?' - everything's made up and the points don't matter.
Answers categories ripe for trolling
- Social Science > Psychology
- Health > Mental Health
- Computers & Internet > Internet > Wikipedia
- Society & Culture > Cultures & Groups > Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgendered
- Social Science > Gender & Women's Studies
- Food & Drink > Vegetarian & Vegan
- Society & Culture > Religion & Spirituality
- Other - Cultures & Groups
How to troll specific categories
Category | Demographic | Weaknesses | How to proceed |
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Any | Idiots | "Racism" | Only refer to blacks as "colored people" |
Computers & Internet > Internet > Wikipedia | Wikipedia fans | Wikipedia cultism | Anything slightly critical of the Wikimedia Foundation or Bomis gets on their nerves. |
Food & Drink > Vegetarian & Vegan | "New Age" idiots | ignorance of biology and metabolism | Attack their biology-illiteracy and New-Agism. Also ask questions on how to cook endangered species. |
Health > Mental Health | psychiatristicists, psychologisticists, suicidal people, biology-illiterates | psychiatry's epistemological foundations (immaterialism, mentalism, society-nature dualism, mind-body dualism, "nature"-"nurture" dualism, psychism), physical weaknesses (suicidal tendencies, dependency on antidepressants, neuroleptics, self-"diagnosis") | You troll it by insinuating that psychiatry's foundations are wrong. If someone "asks" that he's about to commit suicide, kindly tell him to just do so, for the lulz. |
Politics & Government > Politics | Fringe of the left and right extremists on both sides. | Talk about non-U.S. politics. Point out the success of the glorious Soviet Union. Expose pseudoconservatism. Attack Western religion (Christianity + Judaism), "egalitarianism", "democracy", abortionism and "sex ed" advocates. Mock New World Order prophesies. Say that Jews did 9/11. | |
Social Science > Gender & Women's Studies | fans of the social sciences, tea-party "ladies" | resentment against ex-boyfriends, childlessness - make fun of Alanis Morrisette | Just approach it with the thing that annoys social-scienticists the most: the natural sciences. Tell the fucking feminists how resentful they are and what a bunch of losers they are. |
Social Science > Psychology | immaterialists, psychologisticists, attention seekers, dream "interpreters" | aversion against sociobiology, behavioral biology, biology in general, and the natural sciences (materialism), ignorance of how sleep works | The solution is to troll the fuck out of them by saying things that are even slightly materialistic, even slightly natural-scientistic, even slightly biologistic, which is just enough to get on social-science fans' nerves. |
Society & Culture > Cultures & Groups > Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgendered | homos, feminists, leftists | Ask why the people in the category chose to be gay. Also just respond with one word: "Fag". | |
Society & Culture > Religion & Spirituality | Just start making fun of atheists. | Take on the pissed-off Wiccan goth kids. | |
Society & Culture > Cultures & Groups > General Cultures and Groups | anti racist, niggers, and white nationalists | political correctness to the extreme | The key is to make any type of racists and start posting. Anything from good ol' nigger haters to nigger lovers will bring the lulz. |
Politics & Government > Elections | Democrats and Republicans | Just pick either side of the political aisle and then smear the other side for laughs and get massive amounts of thumbs-up. Pick a side and stick with it. |
Gallery
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See Also
- How is babby formed? - Meme derived from Yahoo Answers.
- WikiAnswers
External Links
- This may be the best trolling on the web
- BugMeNot's page of y!answers accounts.
- An accurate depiction of Yahoo! Answers users.
- Collection of questions from Yahoo! Answers.
- Search & Troll these 25 users
- Collection of some of the most epic threads
- Oh NOES! A petition to ip ban trolls from Yahoo! Answers. HOW TERRIFYING!
Yahoo! Answers is part of a series on Trolls. |
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Yahoo! Answers is part of a series on Web 2.0 | Web 2.0 • Social networking • Social networking sites • Blogging • Blogosphere • PHP • Hypercube • Podcasting • Wikiing • Ajax • Ruby on Rails • Internet Humanitarianism • X is not your personal army • User-generated content • ITunes Store
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