Belgium
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Belgium is a buffer state between France and Germany invented by Britain after pwning Napoleon Last Thursday. Noted for having the highest average beer consumption in the World, even more so than Ireland. 'Nuff Said.
It is a founding member of Europe, to avoid getting pwned by the Germans again. It covers an area of 30,528 km2 (11,787 square miles) and has a population of about 10.7 million, which would be invisible from space if it wasn't for the high light pollution going on there. As if that wasn't worse enough, Belgium is populated by Flemings (59%) and Walloons (31%), who can't see each others faces, so they decided to split up the country into two parts. A vast amount of Germans inhabit the east but most Belgians pretend these aren't there.
Belgium was originally part of the Netherlands, but was later invaded by the French, in collaboration with a number of Walloons. England and Prussia had forbidden a French Anschluß, because they were afraid France would pound their asses again, just like in Napoleon's time. So the country became independent. Needless to say, the country became a monstrosity.
Flemings speak Dutch, Walloons speak French, and the Germans speak their own language. None of these three groups can speak the original language in the right way. Walloons and Flemings really despise each other, although both of them are too lazy to cut the umbilical cord. Another reason is that they're pissed on their fruitbeer 1000% of the time, which makes them unable to tell who's Flemish and who's Walloon.
Belgians also sell the majority of their children to people in neighbouring countries, because there is no other way to pay off its highest state deficit in the world. The imported Arab community doesn't do this, which explains why Brussels, the capital, is now 100% Islamic.
The country hasn't had a functional government for decades. Michel Daerden, a French Walloon drunk, pretty much rules the country. He is Wallonia's favorite politician, because they can relate to him. Flemings hate him, because he makes fun of their little language.
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Stuff Belgium is known for
- Beer
- Waffles
- Chocolate
- Legal same sex marriage
- Child Porn
- Saxophone was made there
Stuff you should know about Belgium
Frenched fries were invented in Belgium. The idea that they were invented in France is a grammatical misunderstanding. People will usually shorten it and say "French fries" instead of Frenched fries. The verb "frenched" means to cut into slivers, slivers being very thin pieces.
List of Countries That Didn't PWN Belgium
Belgian Music
Oh and this is also from Belgium:
and
See Also
