The Power 5

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The Power 5 is part of a series on Shock Sites.
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An Overview Of The Shocking Nature Of The Internets

Goatse

Hai2u

Lemonparty

Meatspin

Tubgirl

Coming from different times of different realities, The Power 5 have been owning noobs for at least 100 years. Consisting of a ragtag team of misfits with a devil-may-care attitude and nothing to lose, Goatse, Tubgirl, Lemonparty, Meatspin and HAI2U are out there in the dark corners of the internets, waiting for Baptist mothers of nine and retired online bingo players to stumble upon and flip out over. Rumor has it that every member of The Power 5 can combine together to form the mega-monster that is Last Measure, whose legendary battle cry is "HEY EVERYBODY! I'M LOOKING AT GAY PORNO!!!". It should be noted that LUE is responsible for two of these monstrosities being spread like wildfire through the series of tubes and corrupting the noobs. Nobody has yet noticed 2girls1cup because it's too ~~disgusting to watch~~ epic, and those who've watched the entire thing have been known to go crazy and/or kill themselves thus no good explanation of 2girls1cup has ever been made to include it in The Power 5.

<uniformsmoker@live.com> http://lemonparty.org <10:56>

TNX TNX TNX TNX <10:58> The Power 5 are some of the most basic shock images a computer user can stumble upon when surfing the web. Whether it is on accident (not too likely), "on accident" (most likely if they are a sick fuck), or a trap (most likely if they are a noob), naive internet users have found these images to be completely disgusting and revolting on all accounts. However, these are some of the first shock sites people are desensitized to, which is how internet users become internet abusers. After the initial "OMG WTF GAY BUTTZ OPENING" and "oh my word how disgusting I hate poo blaaaahrghdjdfdfff", the more a person sees these images, the less disgusted they are, even noticing the subtle nuances of these images, such as Goatse's gold ring, the eyeshadow on HAI2U lady being gross, and the odd, miniscule censoring of Tubgirl's vagina. The shock value continues to decrease until it becomes old meme, making it worthless as a trap. However, the knowledge of the Power 5 becomes usable ammo against known noobs, and can result in large amounts of lulz to those more net-savvy around them. EXAMPLE: A chatroom full of trolls with an e-tard.

~#*iLUVabercrombie*#~: Hay guyz, do u kno any good places to get cool glitter text for my Mypace>?
anthonyroma: Yeah, www.lemonparty.org has lots of good text options and colors
~#*iLUVabercrombie*#~: thanx!! *wink*
lostard: lol
greenacresrules: lol
oh ok: loal
~#*iLUVabercrombie*#~: YOU GUYS ARE SICK OMG WAHT THE FUKK WAS THAT OLD GUY GAY PORNO JEEZUS UR MEEN
anthonyroma: lol

And repeat the lols. However, a word of caution: This only works on the most noobiest of noobs, as after any introduction to these sites, be it 1st person trapping or even hearsay, the trapper will be called out by the noob in a "Nice try you sick fucker" fashion, and the ownage will be turned around, and we all know how much it would sting to be owned by a noob. The hunter has become the hunted.

The MySpace generation is likely so desensitized to violence, gore and sex from these images that they will probably not even look up from their poorly-designed HTML pages to notice the apocalypse. Additionally, it is entirely likely that everyone you know has seen Goatse, Tubgirl, Lemonparty, Meatspin and HAI2U, so don't even bother with them. Instead, show your 16-year-old cousin the pain series, which will make her fucking eyes bleed.

A recent challenger is Babypaste, but nobody actually knows what it's a picture of. The viewer's eyelids simply meld together within a millisecond of viewing. Another recent abomination on teh internets is 2girls1cup. Apparently if you get two chicks desperate for money to spend on crack you can justify the use of shit for erotic purposes. This lovely site pretty much trumps the power 5 though it is relatively unknown.