(Originally printed in Daily Variety - 1991)
the voice. You feel like asking her to clear her throat, but then you realize
that she's not sick, she always sounds this way. Her huskiness enters your
ears, but something happens to it before it reaches your brain. It turns
into syrup, coating your apples with caramel. You can taste it. It's a
trans-sensual voice, a gourmet vocal experience, full of burnt offerings.
If the world were populated only with blind men, Demi Moore would still
be one of the sexiest women on earth.
Then there's the body, barely gracing the current cover of Rolling Stone. You picture every father in America showing that cover to their wives, pointing out the hourglass waist, the perfectly dimpled naval, exclaiming "This is what she looks like after having two babies." Demi Moore must be to blame for more female inferiority complexes than Dolly Parton.
Of course it takes more than a body and a voice to be a superstar. Intelligence is Demi's ultimate aphrodisiac. Her head is the real secret of her appeal. She doesn't play bimbos. Her brains shine through her roles, attracting and intimidating all the men around her. With elegance and openness, she proves it's possible to be sultry and exude innocence at the same time. Guys on the make, trying to pick her up, know that the standard lines won't work. She sees through them, making them want to beg, but begging doesn't work, and neither does a million dollars, which only buys her body, not her soul.
She was born Nov. 11, 1962 as Demetria Guynes in Roswell, New Mexico. Her teenage parents moved 48 times before she graduated from high school and left home before the age of 16.
Five years later, she got her first break - a part in General Hospital as Luke's new leading lady. Laura Templeton (Janine Turner) had disappeared into a fog and was presumed dead. Enter Demi as her feisty lookalike sister Jackie Templeton. She sizzled with Luke for a while till he ditched her for Emma Samms.
Then came several wacky comedies and one widescreen 3D horror flick. Soon, her career spiraled into the stratosphere.
My personal favorites include The Seventh Sign, where Demi is pregnant with Michael Biehn's baby and the fate of the whole goddam planet is at stake. Talk about unnatural childbirth. With outrageous symbolism and intense performances, this is a film that takes the scriptures so earnestly it makes them look like bad science fiction. And so it was spoken that mankind would come to an unspeakable end through spectacular art direction. It's terrific trash.
In Mortal Thoughts, Joyce (Glenne Headley) kills her macho scumbag of a husband (Bruce Willis). Nobody really minds, much less her best friend Cynthia (Demi Moore). Their conspiracy to hide the truth gets them in trouble. It's a perfect double bill with Thelma and Louise.