Everything you need to know about sex

Sex and university are intrinsically linked, find out how to get the best and avoid the pests.

Sex is a serious business, but in the heat of the moment people rarely think clearly about it. Yet it can affect your health, or even land you with a child you’re not prepared for, so it’s important to consider how you want to approach it in your time at university or college.

But what’s different about sex at university/college?

Well, potentially quite a lot. For a start, you might not have had sex yet, and there’s nothing wrong with that. In fact, you might not want to have sex yet, and there’s certainly nothing wrong with that either. However, doing the maths, you’re likely to meet a lot of people you find attractive at university or college. You’ll be living independently, so your mum won’t know if you bring someone home. If you drink excessively, that can also affect the decisions you make about what to do and with whom.

But I haven’t even met anyone yet...

That’s sort of the point. If you don’t know someone, you don’t know whether you can trust them enough to do something as intimate as have sex with them. One-night stands can leave you feeling empty and used. But if you do decide to do it, it’s essential to use a condom – the only method of contraception that protects you against unwanted pregnancy and STIs.

What about STIs and HIV?

Sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) are on the rise among young people. HIV is the scariest STD, but unprotected sex could also give you the likes of herpes (painful viral blisters that are incurable, recurring throughout your life), chlamydia (often no symptoms, but causes infertility if left untreated) or gonorrhea (a thick yellow discharge which can cause pelvic inflammatory disease and/or arthritis).

I don’t fancy any of that. Where can I get a pack of condoms?

Buy them from chemists, supermarkets or from vending machines in pub and nightclub loos. Or they’re free from family planning clinics, Brook Advisory Centres (www.brook.org.uk) and many student unions and bars. Just make sure they have the CE or BSI kitemark.

My partner doesn’t want to use a condom, what shall I do?

You should think about finding a new partner, then; this one is putting your health and theirs at risk. That said, if you’re in a committed relationship, you could look into other methods of contraception, like the pill or hormone injections or implants. Your GP will be able to advise you on the best one for you. However, you should both get tested for any STIs before you have sex without a condom.

We don't use a condom, we trust each other...

Trust is irrelevant: many people don’t realise that they have STIs. You don’t need to have slept around in the past, just been unlucky.

What if we have an accident?

It’s important to act quickly if a condom splits or you’ve had unprotected sex. Emergency contraception (the morning-after pill) can be taken up to 72 hours after unprotected sex and should prevent a pregnancy, although it becomes less effective the longer you leave it within that time period. You can get tested for STIs at your local hospital, family planning clinic or Brook Advisory Centre.

Is it safe to sleep around?

Whatever kind of sex you’re having, it’s important to make it safe by using contraception. But sleeping around carries other risks – that you’ll end up feeling emotionally confused or do things you’ll later regret. You have to do what’s right for you, but just make sure you’re fully informed.