Could This IHOP Brawl Put "I Ride The Ride" On The Catch-Phrase Map? (NSFW)

There's a lot going on in this two-minute piece of artistry from the IHOP in Orangeburg, S.C. on Saturday. Drinks being thrown. Canes being swung. Gibberish being yelled. And, a chilling effect being felt. More »
Yesterday - January 26, 2011

Here's Some Thundersnow Telestrator Dong

This red telestrator dong was brought to you by John Bolaris of Philadelphia's Fox29. Looks to be more than 100-miles long. (H/T R.A.)

Joel Monaghan Is Ready To Have A Laugh About The Whole Dog-Fellatio Thing

Remember Australian rugby player Joel Monaghan, aka "Dude Getting Blown By Dog" SHOTY nominee? Been a rough three months since Joel's lil sis saw pictures of the "drunken, dog‑related depravity that followed Canberra Raiders' end-of-season celebrations last October." More »

Football Writers Of America Feverishly Honing Their Wittiest "Troy vs. Clay" Hair Puns

Clay Matthews signed a one-year endorsement deal today. It's with Unilever's Suave brand. Matthews' "marketing agent" Ryan Williams said it involves pre- and post-Super Bowl appearances. And a whole lot of groovy questions about Troy Polamalu's mane as well. More »

Jewish Hockey Player Sues Anaheim Ducks Alleging Anti-Semitic Harassment

Jason Bailey signed a three-year contract with the Ducks organization in 2008. They assigned him to play for the minor league Bakersfield Condors where, he claimed in a lawsuit filed Tuesday, he "was subject to severe and/or pervasive harassment." More »

The Most Unlikely Basket You'll See All Day, Unless Hasheem Thabeet Gets Garbage Time Minutes

Is this planned? Probably not planned. But if I'm the kid making this inbounds pass, I'm telling everyone this went off exactly the way it was drawn up. More »

Key Fake JFK Ambulance Evidence Also Fake

Throughout the saga of the 1963 Pontiac ambulance that purportedly carried the body of President John F. Kennedy, the Barrett-Jackson auction house touted a metal plate attached to its dash as possible proof of authenticity. Trouble is, it's fake, too. [Jalopnik]

Arian Foster Is Humble, But Also Wouldn't Mind A Giant New Contract

Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Foster might be the best RB, but isn't paid like it. More »

Know Your Different Types Of Zits

Whether it's big and juicy or small with potential, there are many forms of blemishes, not limited to simply whiteheads and blackheads. Herewith, an examination of the different categories of pimples and their popping possibilities. [Jezebel]

Men's Health Editor Plagiarizes His Own Writers

Last year, we caught Men's Health editor Dave Zinczenko reusing covers. Turns out that's not the only way Zinczenko recycles content: He's been ripping other writers' bylines off old Men's Health articles and passing them off as his own. [Gawker]
#nhl

Don't Want To Play For A Crappy Team? A Former Player Says That's Too Damn Bad

Evgeni Nabokov was claimed on waivers by the Islanders, but has no intentions of reporting. Justin Bourne's been in that situation, and says Nabby needs to suck it up. More »

Caster Semenya Not Really Bothered By That "Gender Dispute" Thing

Or at least that's what she says in her first interview since being cleared to run as a female. Though she was reportedly "shattered" by the controversy, she insists, "I'm not ashamed of being myself. I know who I am." [Jezebel]

Fan Attacks Player Over Shared Girlfriend

The home fans storm the pitch after a huge upset. One punches out one of his own players. Why? Over a woman, of course. More »

Basketball Bully Uploads His Own Punch Video to the Internet

"I was at a basketball game tossing in the ball (#34) and #3 hit my eye and I punched him." So says Evan, who recently uploaded this video of him punching an opponent during a youth basketball game gone awry. [Gawker.TV]
#boosters

A Former UConn Football Player Puts Robert Burton In His Place

Booster Robert Burton made some news yesterday thanks to the obnoxious letter he sent to UConn's athletic director, Jeff Hathaway, explaining why he will no longer donate money to the school's football program. Robert Lunn, a former UConn player, responds. More »

What Formula One Cars Will Look Like In 2020

F1 cars will undergo a more radical change by 2020 than they did in the previous decade according to former Renault engineering boss Pat Symonds. Saddled with 3D cameras and a new efficiency regulations, here's a peek into the future. [Jalopnik]

Some Chick From The Bachelor Says Carlos Boozer Cheated On His Wife With Her

I know what you're thinking. An NBA player cheating on his wife? A reality TV "star" selling her story to a tabloid magazine? Hard to believe, I know. But it's true! Allegedly. More »

Last Night's Winner: Hit A Crucial Three? That's A Nut Shot

Florida and Georgia played an excellent double-OT game last night. But if you want a recap, go to the AP. If you want video of a player getting towel-whipped in the groin by his own teammate, you've come to the right place. More »
#wakeupdeadspin

Lionel Messi Shouldn't Have Wished His Mami A Happy Birthday

Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day. More »
Tuesday - January 25, 2011

Man Defecates In Store, Steals Candy, Leaves Dirty Undies, And Lashes Out At Schoolchildren

A 45-year-old Swede walks into a store in Finspång, says to the cashier, he's really, really gotta go. Female cashier says health regulations prevent her from allowing him to do so in the employees' WC. So, what'd he do? More »

Owner Shows Off BMW On Internet Forum Before His Deadly Crash

The 28-year-old killed when he split his BMW M3 in half in a suspected high-speed drunk driving incident posted photos of the car and requests for track recommendations to an M3 forum. Sadly, he never got an answer. [Jalopnik]
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