I have been reading this and hearing this enough times lately from those who hold certain theological perspectives that because Jesus said:
"Everyone will hate you because of Me.." (Matthew 10:22)
"Do not be surprised, my brothers and sisters, if the world hates you." (1 John 3:13)
...that when people outside the church say they don't like Christians or when we don't see any fruit evangelistically, that is simply because Jesus told us that they would "hate" us and we can then just assume that is why they may not like us.
I fully, fully am aware that it is not human effort or evangelistic tricks that someone responds to the gospel, but it is the power of the Spirit of God who convicts someone and draws someone to their understanding of their need for a Savior.
But my questions are these:
It seems to be thought, that because Jesus said they will "hate us", we shouldn't be surprised that we are rejected if we try to share the gospel and it may even offend people as we share with them.
It strangely feels that to some Christians it is self-assuring to be "hated" by non-Christians, to prove that they must be doing the Lord's work.
I have picked up that there is a theme to how this belief may shape one's view of evangelism. It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy to expect to be "hated". So if someone expects to be hated and rejected, then it makes it pretty easy that someone can simply jump straight to laying out the facts of the gospel without taking the time to build relationships, trust, listen to the other person's belief, hang out with them, care about them, pray for them over extended periods of time etc.
Is it the gospel that is rejected or is it the personality of the Christian and the evangelistic approach that is being rejected and "hated"?
With this view, people skills then don't make too much difference or matter a ton. Our tone of voice or how argumentative we are doesn't make a difference. When and how we share about the gospel doesn't make a difference - as long as we feel we said it and got it out. So when we have people respond back that they don't want to hear it - then we feel we are simply fulfilling what Jesus said about being "hated" and we can run back to our Christian circles feeling like we have done our duty and the Lord must be pleased as we are "hated" by the world and rejected.
- Yes, I fully know the gospel is a stumbling block and people will reject the gospel. But I am wondering are people rejecting the person because of how they go about sharing the gospel, more than rejecting the gospel itself?
- Are people "hating" the personalities of the Christian and the sometimes awkwardness of the approach used than actually hating the gospel itself?
- Could it be the lack of interest that the Christian can show for the other person, the lack of listening to the other person and people skills (yes, I know the Spirit is who does it, but the basic ways we communicate do matter) - so when people say "I'm not interested", it is because we haven't really shown interest in them as a person to befriend them, hang out with them, be caring about them, going to movies with them, building trust so when we do talk about the gospel, we have earned the right and trust for them to want to hear what we say?
- Could it be, that for some people, the "they will hate us" saying of Jesus, makes it easy to stay enclosed in our Christian bubble, stay on Christian blogs and talk with other Christians all the time, and feel like we have done our job evangelistically if we have shared with a stranger on a plane or with someone new at our workplace and they didn't respond?
- Do some Christians use "they will hate us" as an excuse for lack of fruit or effort to be out among non-Christians?
I have some further theories and opinions, that I may share later - but I have heard the "they will hate us" response so many times lately, it is driving me nutty quite honestly. I know Jesus said they will hate us, but what was He specifically talking about there in that context?
- Is this what Jesus was talking about when He said "you will be hated because of Me?"
Again, I know fully well that the gospel will be rejected. I have been rejected many times when sharing the gospel with friends. But I wonder if in our culture today, the issue of when Christians are "hated" is more about Christians and the lack of "love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control" that is experienced by those who are not Christians than it is about "hating" the gospel. The lack of truly investing into the lives of people before we go and press them for a decision about the gospel.
I am wondering if some Christians in a weird way actually like being "hated"?
Because if we simply assume that, it then gives us an excuse not to be involved in lives of those outside the church and also a reason why we don't see people respond to the gospel and then we can huddle with primarily all Christians. I wonder, if some who expect to be "hated" then have the excuse to not make extra effort to break out of our Christian bubble and pray more and be out among those outside the church more, so we can gain a voice and trust and people know we really care about them, and not give up on them as friends, even if they don't immediately respond to the gospel.
I also know very well that love is telling truth, and I am not talking about holding back any truth of the gospel or lightening truth or hiding it or not talking about sin and repentance or the blood and sacrifice of Jesus. I am talking more about how we live out the truth, how we share the truth, how we care about others and are involved in their lives who may not know truth.
