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chanarchive.org > archive > 4chan > /r9k/ - ROBOT9000 > Forever Alone Cure

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File :1294953383183.png-(50 KB, 514x399, alonenomore.png)
50 KB Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)16:16:2 No.12908838  
GUYS

I found the cure for being forever alone!

Currently installing, not long now...

(http://www.hongfire.com/forum/showthread.php?t=86353)
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)16:18:5 No.12908869
Screenshots? It seems to good to be true!!
>> dildo thermometer !irnZpxWqy. 1/13/11(Thu)16:21:16 No.12908891
     File :1294953676993.png-(232 KB, 839x438, aa.png)
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omgeeeeZ
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)16:23:3 No.12908910
Cure? don't you mean a cause?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)16:32:3 No.12908990
     File :1294954352718.png-(951 KB, 1596x945, neveralone.png)
951 KB
So, this is the character creation screen... lots of options.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)16:36:4 No.12909037
>>12908910
Yes, it probably does contribute to people being forever alone. Why? Because they'd rather pretend with a girl made of polygons than put up with a stupid women leeching off them like the vapid parasite she is.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)16:37:5 No.12909053
>>12909037
Misoginy? in my r9k?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)16:38:0 No.12909054
Please op, can you post some more?

Signed,

Grateful Anonymooose
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)16:38:1 No.12909056
     File :1294954692528.png-(948 KB, 1477x702, neveralone2.png)
948 KB
Plenty of options for the most critical variables
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)16:38:5 No.12909061
>>12909053
*sigh* Whatever, you know it's true femanon/pussywhipped white knight.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)16:39:4 No.12909075
ok and what exactly can you do with your new waifu?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)16:41:0 No.12909090
>>12909075
Yes. I want to know this before I download 6GB.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)16:44:0 No.12909123
     File :1294955049953.png-(1.14 MB, 1497x788, neveralone3.png)
1.14 MB
>>12909075
>>12909090

Aight, I'll just finish messing with the other variables and then see if I can load her into the game.

I decided to give her nice, natural-looking hair and eye colours.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)16:47:3 No.12909152
     File :1294955250316.png-(336 KB, 796x731, neveralone4.png)
336 KB
I picked her some character traits I thought /r9k/ would like :3
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)16:51:1 No.12909195
Come on OP :3

I can't wait to see results..
>> Resist. !R3eU2IeERs 1/13/11(Thu)16:53:32 No.12909214
>>12909152
>uneasy around men not selected
>easy around men
but she's a whore...no way r9k would approve
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)16:57:2 No.12909257
     File :1294955849499.png-(1.36 MB, 1287x994, neveralone5.png)
1.36 MB
WORLD CREATED, it will be my reward for a lifetime spent as a mighty viking warrior.

I shall import the girl, whom random generation has named "Lily".
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)16:58:4 No.12909277
>>12909152
/rk9/ has assburgers, they dont like clumsy girls
also
>uneasy around man not selected.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)16:59:0 No.12909279
>>12909123

> nice, natural-looking hair and eye colour
>grey hair and bright green eyes
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:00:3 No.12909297
Are there any of these games with males?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:01:4 No.12909309
>>12909297
Bahahahaha! Fag!
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:01:5 No.12909314
     File :1294956116500.png-(1015 KB, 1269x868, neveralone6.png)
1015 KB
Well, I seem to have spawned in a room, and there she is, standing demurely. She also seems to be missing any clothes whatsoever, I guess I was supposed to put them on her during character creation or something?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:09:2 No.12909387
     File :1294956564809.png-(1.44 MB, 1272x969, neveralone7.png)
1.44 MB
She's disappeared ;_;

I find myself at some kind of beach cafe. I have no idea where the goddamn rocket launcher is on this level.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:11:2 No.12909416
>>12909387
She just gets naked and leaves you like that?

Bitches and Whores man, bitches and whores.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:14:3 No.12909461
     File :1294956876990.png-(1.4 MB, 1414x926, neveralone8.png)
1.4 MB
>>12909416

I know, man, I know.

Anyway I tracked her down, she seemed to have decided to go to some shrine or something.

Think it might enhance the verisimilitude if I hugged a warm bag of sand at the same time my on-screen character hugs the girl?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:15:3 No.12909471
This is pathetic, I'm glad I'm being trolled...
..Right?
Right guys?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:16:3 No.12909481
can you torture it?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:17:4 No.12909496
     File :1294957069325.jpg-(58 KB, 475x414, neveralone9.jpg)
58 KB
HOLY SHIT SHE'S HOLDING HANDS WITH ME

WHAT DO I DO NOW? It means she likes me, right? Right?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:19:3 No.12909510
The lack of loli in artifical girl always bugged me.

I'm not forever alone because I have utterly vanilla taste in women, I'm forever alone because I want fucking lolis or girls with rare developmental disorders.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:20:4 No.12909523
>>12909496
Uh uh...DEAR GOD I DON'T KNOW.

The only side i ever feel of a womans hand is the back....Uh....lets go for the better.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:21:4 No.12909541
     File :1294957305768.jpg-(226 KB, 1266x862, neveralone10.jpg)
226 KB
HAHAHA

I WALKED IN ON HER TAKING A DUMP

This is the best game ever.

Its mimicry of real life is truly astounding.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:23:3 No.12909580
>>12908838
Pure women do not poop.

Game confirmed for shitty.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:27:3 No.12909639
hey faggot, put this mod on. http://girley3t.isgreat.org/
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:27:3 No.12909640
could you like... put some clothes on her?
>> R@0 01/13/11(Thu)17:28:5 No.12909665
This is entertaining..
She is always naked ?
Must be really awkward.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:29:1 No.12909671
>>12909665

No, he just didn't put clothes on her lol.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:29:3 No.12909675
>>12909640
Ferengi mode?

>I'm such a pathetic nerd ;_;
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:34:3 No.12909740
     File :1294958076678.jpg-(220 KB, 1261x925, neveralone11.jpg)
220 KB
She doesn't seem to like me that much, I can hug her, but she doesn't like to progress to kissing.

See how she stands, looking down at me disdainfully with her leg clipping through the sofa.

>>12909640
I assume I missed the option in the creation dialogue, in my haste.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:35:2 No.12909747
>>12909740


Even naked one-legged girl you designed for yourself doesn't like you.

;_;
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:37:5 No.12909771
>>12909747
oh god this made me laugh

bloxxxxxx
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:43:0 No.12909836
     File :1294958580751.png-(1.02 MB, 1245x888, neveralone12.png)
1.02 MB
D:

WHY WON'T YOU LOVE ME, LILY?
>> Nomad !4.qAlone4U 1/13/11(Thu)17:45:47 No.12909865
LOL I'm downloading this shit so hard I'm gonna break my WiFi.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:46:0 No.12909868
>>12909836
I'll always be here for you fellow robot

;_; we godda stick together man, stay strong
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:47:2 No.12909884
>>12909836
>GODDAMNITLOVEHIM!!!!!
;_;
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:48:0 No.12909885
     File :1294958881199.jpg-(164 KB, 888x732, neveralone13.jpg)
164 KB
Okay, going to try something new.

Old and busted: Lily
New hotness: randomly-generated girl number 2

I've given her traits that should make her more receptive, note that the "not a virgin" box is UNSELECTED so she should still be OK by r9k's standards, we'll assume her sexual experience in the cowgirl position comes from studying textbooks and other research materials.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:48:5 No.12909896
bump moar screenshots

prtsc pl0x
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:48:5 No.12909897
>>12909885
>Old and busted:
>New hotness:

Awesome.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:49:1 No.12909900
Easy-modo

>>12909152

>Childhood friend
>Extremely Jealous

>Talk to other girls
>Let her get jealous as fuck
>Talk to her
>Have sex
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:49:5 No.12909907
>>12909885

Try putting some damn clothes on this one.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:50:0 No.12909909
>>12909885

>old
>virgin

That's not right.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:53:5 No.12909954
     File :1294959233934.jpg-(92 KB, 436x851, neveralone14.jpg)
92 KB
>>12909907

Okay, here we are, NEW GIRL HAS ARRIVED

And this time she's wearing clothes!

Look at that expression, robots. She wants me. She totally wants me.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:55:4 No.12909977
     File :1294959347631.jpg-(236 KB, 865x824, neveralone15.jpg)
236 KB
I can't believe this.

She's just playing hard to get, right? Right?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:57:0 No.12909991
>>12909977

>old
>sailor outfit

Also, have you tried just talking to her?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:58:0 No.12909998
>>12909977
no...no...no NO NON NONONOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

;_; ~ y?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)17:58:2 No.12910003
Im resisiting but I know I will eventually download this game...

So lonely ;.;
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:00:5 No.12910048
>>12909977
>>12909954

>new girl arrives
>2 minutes later tries to have sex

nope.bmp

Chat her up OP, or take her out first.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:02:4 No.12910069
     File :1294959763687.gif-(142 KB, 1024x753, 1278477821188.gif)
142 KB
>>12909675

Star trek is not nerdy, it is cool
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:04:0 No.12910091
     File :1294959845543.jpg-(127 KB, 887x602, neveralone16.jpg)
127 KB
Progress, anons! Progress!
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:04:3 No.12910098
>>12910069

what exactly are those 'factors' a measurement of?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:05:5 No.12910111
Nice man nice, maybe you should play a nice game of Jenga?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:07:1 No.12910122
     File :1294960036602.jpg-(124 KB, 711x792, neveralone17.jpg)
124 KB
Holy shit guys, it's happening, I was standing behind her holding down right click and then suddenly I was touching her boobs!
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:07:2 No.12910123
Mouth rape her when she sleeps
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:08:0 No.12910127
>>12910122

I was thinking about going to sleep. Now I've changed my mind.
>> Skåningen !!wTLzgOZ0J 01/13/11(Thu)18:08:0 No.12910128
Downloading ;_;
How exactly does the interaction and controls work?
Knowing Jap games they are bound to be fubar..
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:08:2 No.12910133
>>12910122
>now have butterflies

W...T...H....?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:08:4 No.12910137
>>12910098
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Warp_drive_%28Star_Trek%29
It makes a lot more sense than most FTL myths (looking at star wars here)
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:08:4 No.12910140
i think i have to get this game. New fap material
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:09:4 No.12910155
>>12910122

Shit, that must be what I've been doing wrong all this time!
The game is telling you to press c, do it!
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:10:2 No.12910170
     File :1294960226968.jpg-(57 KB, 314x569, neveralone18.jpg)
57 KB
Okay, I seem to have entered some kind of... sex mode. Depending on where my cursor is it changes to a hand, a pair of lips, or this picture of a mushroom.

I guess they wanted to make the simulated sex just as difficult and confusing as the real deal, huh? :(
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:10:5 No.12910177
Good. Now fuck her doggy-style on the couch.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:11:1 No.12910184
>>12910170

ITS A TRAP

SHE WANTS TO FUCK YOU IN THE ASS WITH A MUSHROOM
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:11:1 No.12910185
>>12910170
Mushroom Dick. Gross
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:12:0 No.12910194
>>12909056

>Breast orientation
Needs to be 100%, bro.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:12:4 No.12910201
>>12910185
Maybe she is hinting she wants to eat his dick? Surely that would please a woman.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:12:5 No.12910202
http://scratchpad.wikia.com/wiki/Artificial_Girl_3_Ecchi_guide

OP, THIS IS HOW YOU SEX.

It's an unbelievably complicated system of mouse gestures and timing puzzles.

What the hell Japan.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:13:2 No.12910206
>>12910170
she has a mushroom farm in her vagina
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:13:3 No.12910210
>>12910170

I think it means you are going to be a mushroom-cloud layin' motherfucker, motherfucker.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:14:4 No.12910225
     File :1294960483058.jpg-(181 KB, 1083x746, neveralone19.jpg)
181 KB
Ohoho, progress, progress.

Unfortunately I reached this stage by wiggling the mouse randomly and clicking every so often. Unsure how to proceed.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:15:0 No.12910231
>>12910206
Magic mushrooms in her vagina? Nice bro, you got a keeper.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:17:1 No.12910261
     File :1294960638658.jpg-(75 KB, 426x590, neveralone20.jpg)
75 KB
Am poised, and ready to enter. Unsure how to proceed. Holding the cursor over her clothes seems to make them disappear after a certain interval of confused clicking.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:17:2 No.12910262
>>12910225
>Unfortunately I reached this stage by wiggling the mouse randomly and clicking every so often. Unsure how to proceed.

It's just like real life....
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:18:1 No.12910279
>>12910261
Right click and hold, then move the mouse so you thrust in. This is how you sex.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:19:4 No.12910299
     File :1294960781184.jpg-(320 KB, 1266x849, FOREVERANDEVERALONE.jpg)
320 KB
Oh my god.

Oh my fucking god.

I just...

WHY ;_;

WHYYYYYYYYY
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:20:3 No.12910313
     File :1294960835567.jpg-(85 KB, 706x433, FOREVERANDEVERALONE2.jpg)
85 KB
Who... who the hell would make a game like that? I don't understand!
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:20:4 No.12910318
>>12910299
I'm sorry anon ;_;
Beaches and Shores man
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:21:1 No.12910328
>>12910299
YES!

YYEESSSSSS!

Delicious tears are delicious tears. OP confirmed for avatar of /r9k/.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:21:2 No.12910329
>>12910299
>>12910313
ITS JUST LIKE REAL LIFE ;_;
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:21:4 No.12910333
>>12910299
You got no game, son. Seriously, it's not hard to figure out how to rape.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:22:3 No.12910345
>WHY AM I JELLY?!
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME?!
>> Skåningen !!wTLzgOZ0J 01/13/11(Thu)18:22:3 No.12910346
>>12910202
Fuck that! God damn controls.
*cancels download*
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:23:3 No.12910359
Go for the nudist girl instead!
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:23:5 No.12910364
>>12910299
>>12910313
I laughed so fucking hard!
Way to go.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:24:5 No.12910382
>>12910313
BITCHES AND WHORES BITCHES AND WHORES BITCHES AND WHORES, SLIT HER THROAT THEN FUCK HER DEAD CORPSE
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:25:1 No.12910386
at least you know what a simulated version of yourself touching a virtual breast feels like
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:25:1 No.12910388
>>12910313
>>12910299
buy a computer and log onto /r9k/
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:27:1 No.12910414
NOOOOOOOO ;_;
And here I was, hoping that /r9k/ would finally lose it's virginity, virtually if nothing else.
Ask her if you can still be friend at least. You can always try sneaking in your dick again in an unguarded moment.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:27:2 No.12910419
>Wild girl simulation appears!
>Go /r9k/!
>/r9k/ uses Sweet Kiss!
>It's not very effective....
>Girl simulation flees!
>Wild girl simulation 2 appears!
>Go /r9k/!
>/r9k/ uses confused click!
>It's not very effective...
>Girl simulation 2 flees!

I have not laughed so hard in many days
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:27:5 No.12910425
Should have picked "easily aroused" OP.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:28:3 No.12910430
     File :1294961310975.jpg-(123 KB, 945x730, neveralone21.jpg)
123 KB
>>12910388

No! There is still hope!

At least, this girl seems to be more receptive to me watching her peeing.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:28:3 No.12910434
WHY IS WOMAN SO HARD TO UNDERSTAND
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:29:1 No.12910446
Should set up a stream op
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:29:3 No.12910453
This thread needs to be archived, and then stickied, and then put into a museum.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:30:3 No.12910470
OP

WHY YOU NO MAKE CATGIRL LOLI?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:31:0 No.12910478
this thread is golden, seriously
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:31:2 No.12910480
     File :1294961484771.jpg-(118 KB, 783x552, neveralone22.jpg)
118 KB
Okay, take two, had my character sleep on it, and then jumped her while she was getting out of bed.

She seems to have forgotten yesterday... are real girls so forgiving? :(

>>12910446

I'm afraid I don't know how to into stream.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:31:5 No.12910490
WHAT THE FUCK IS THE MUSHROOM FOR
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:32:1 No.12910498
>not putting breast size to maximum

MOVE OVER FAGGOT LEMME TRY NEXT
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:32:2 No.12910500
Not even numbers will love you...
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:34:2 No.12910522
>>12910480

She wants your mushroom, OP! Finally we are winning!
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:34:2 No.12910524
     File :1294961667052.jpg-(131 KB, 758x590, neveralone23.jpg)
131 KB
Erm, I want to, but I don't know how...
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:35:2 No.12910532
>>12910524
How does penis
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:35:2 No.12910535
>>12910480
>>12910490
DON'T DO IT!
SHE'S GOT A FUNGAL INFECTION
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:35:4 No.12910540
>>12910524

>Erm, I want to, but I don't know how...

I think this sums up everything.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:36:2 No.12910545
>>12910524
How do I stuck penis?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:36:4 No.12910551
>>12910524
HOLD THE RIGHT MOUSE BUTTON. THEN MOVE THE CURSOR SO THAT YOU JAM IT IN

GODDAMN YOU PEOPLE ARE STUPID
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:36:5 No.12910555
     File :1294961816912.jpg-(100 KB, 993x604, neveralone24.jpg)
100 KB
So, there seems to be something coming out of her vagina, I assume this is a positive physiological sign?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:38:1 No.12910572
>>12910555

You're doing it right OP!
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:38:2 No.12910575
For the love of god mouthrape her
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:38:4 No.12910577
     File :1294961920435.png-(984 KB, 800x600, wtfamiplaying.png)
984 KB
Click on mushroom-penis and drag mouse up!
QUICKLY OP BEFORE SHE GETS BORED AGAIN.

pic very related
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:38:4 No.12910580
>>12910555
I'M TELLING YOU MAN IT'S THE FUNGUS
I WARNED YOU BRO
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:39:1 No.12910586
I am
crying out of laughter
AHAHAHA
ahaha
this thread is the best EVER MOOT you need to sticky this. AHAHAHAHA
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:40:0 No.12910595
This is the best r9k can hope for...
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:40:1 No.12910599
JESUS CHRIST THE FACT THAT THIS THREAD EXISTS MAKES ME WANT TO LIVE ON THE MOON!!!!!!!!!
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:40:4 No.12910607
Download game.
Slow as fuck. what the hell?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:42:0 No.12910628
     File :1294962126579.jpg-(159 KB, 980x473, neveralone25.jpg)
159 KB
She's a classy gal, /r9k/.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:42:5 No.12910639
>>12910555

She pissed herself. Trufax.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:44:1 No.12910657
     File :1294962254889.jpg-(253 KB, 1275x949, neveralone26.jpg)
253 KB
..I think it means she likes me?

I'M GOING IN, ROBOTS, unless the interface makes me suddenly disengage.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:44:3 No.12910662
Thanks for your request.
It has been added to our database and the thread will be archived as soon as enough request for that thread have been made.
This thread has been requested 3 times now.

Fuck lurking, I need to tell this thread must be archived at all costs.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:45:0 No.12910666
>>12910555

Her vagoo seems moldy, OP. I think I know what the mushroom means now.
Not that us robots would mind, of course :(
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:46:1 No.12910679
Please fail please fail.. I think if you do that I can kill myself in laughter.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:46:3 No.12910681
>>12910657

Is this what I say to girls to make them love me?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:46:4 No.12910684
>>12910657
>>12910657
>wooden floor

her back must be feeling very cold!
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:47:2 No.12910698
     File :1294962443670.jpg-(132 KB, 1001x695, neveralone27.jpg)
132 KB
I... I can't get my cock to stay inside or establish any kind of rhythm! I drag the mouse up but I keep on sliding back out :/
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:48:3 No.12910712
>>12910698
>her face
oh god
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:48:4 No.12910716
even your virtual cock is too small to please a woman
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:48:5 No.12910717
>>12910698
It has to go ALL THE WAY IN. You can't half ass it. Seriously, man, this is not a difficult minigame.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:49:5 No.12910734
     File :1294962593587.jpg-(160 KB, 1191x912, neveralone28.jpg)
160 KB
God damn this game's interface is retarded! I'm kneeling in front of her, staring at my cock and rubbing it introspectively, HOW THE HELL DO I PUT IT IN?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:50:2 No.12910741
.>>12910698

AHAHAHA
she is so totally thinking
"just get it done. I only agreed to do it out of pitty"
AHAHAHAHA
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:50:3 No.12910746
>fully clothed during sex

>this ain't kosher
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:50:3 No.12910748
>>12910712
>>12910698

>Nee-chan I am dissapoint.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:50:4 No.12910749
>>12910734

>God damn this game's interface is retarded! I'm kneeling in front of her, staring at my cock and rubbing it introspectively, HOW THE HELL DO I PUT IT IN?

Just like real life.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:50:4 No.12910754
     File :1294962648344.jpg-(68 KB, 1024x768, THEPOSE.jpg)
68 KB
OP, you are horrible at AG3. Just look at what I can do.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:51:0 No.12910757
loololololololololololollololollllllololol
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:52:3 No.12910775
>>12910734

Give it up man, just fap on her instead.
Even computer sex was not meant for the likes of you and me.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:52:2 No.12910778
This thread is gIorious!
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:52:4 No.12910782
     File :1294962765630.jpg-(85 KB, 673x539, neveralone29.jpg)
85 KB
PROGRESS REPORT:

She has gotten bored and gone to sleep.

I sit on the edge of her bed, wondering if there are enough pills in the medicine cabinet to end my misery :(
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:53:3 No.12910792
>>12910778

Indeed this is the best fucking thing I have ever read about ever on 4chan AHAHAHAHA..
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:53:4 No.12910796
>>12910782
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

im dying OP kill me now end my pain!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:53:4 No.12910797
>>12910754

You are the master of fucking computers.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:54:0 No.12910803
>>12910782

OP, even though you suck at obtaining even virtual women, you are still entertaining us all.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:54:3 No.12910809
     File :1294962870725.jpg-(42 KB, 1024x768, 2008_0905_1858_23531.jpg)
42 KB
>>12910797
You know it. Just look at how pleased she is.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:54:4 No.12910817
>>12910782

HAHAH AHAH A im about to blow a funny fuse.. OP I love you you are golden AHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHHAHHA
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:55:1 No.12910826
>>12910782

Now is your chance OP! Awkwardly attempted buttraep ahoy!
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:55:4 No.12910835
>>12910782
>>12910782
>>12910782
>>12910782
>>12910782
>>12910782
OMG im dieng i cant breath
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:55:4 No.12910836
r9k
you always manage to entertain me :D
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:56:5 No.12910846
3rd time's the charm OP!!
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:56:5 No.12910853
>>12910555
>>12910809

wtf is with all the leaky shit? Do they melt if you fuck them too hard?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:57:4 No.12910862
>>12910853

Yes.

Women melt if you fuck them too hard.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)18:58:4 No.12910870
KEEP TRYING OP

GOOD LUCK AND GOD SPEED
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:00:0 No.12910896
     File :1294963206211.jpg-(165 KB, 1058x695, neveralone30.jpg)
165 KB
Day four: every time I go into her room, she is asleep. I try to wake her up, but she doesn't respond.

I think she's just pretending to be asleep ;_;
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:00:4 No.12910900
>>12910862

D:
I'll never have sex ever. I could not live with that kind of burden.
I mean, what would you even tell any future employers when they ask to see your criminal record?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:00:5 No.12910903
>>12910862

Everything said in this thread only furthers and builds upon the already hilarious stereotype of the average r9kers understanding of the wimmins.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:01:1 No.12910913
OP, you need to move your mouse UP more to jam it in.
Either clear a fucking runway on your desk so you can go for a long-range insertion with one swift movement, or just raise your mouse sensitivity.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:01:1 No.12910914
This is one of those absolutely legendary threads that we mortal men are lucky enough to experience at least once in our lives.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:01:3 No.12910920
>>12910896
Seems like playing this game is more depressing than not playing this game

;_;
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:01:3 No.12910921
>>12910896
I think she killed herself with the medicine in the caupboard, just so YOU wouldn't be able to.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:01:4 No.12910924
     File :1294963300090.jpg-(87 KB, 933x468, neveralone31.jpg)
87 KB
Oh wait, I seem to have woken her up by kneeling awkwardly over her.

This is totally going to go my way this time, I can feel it. I've even upped the mouse sensitivity to see if it'll make my cock work properly.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:02:4 No.12910938
>>12910896

Great job, asshole. She's gone into a coma from not getting laid for three days straight.

DON'T YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT WOMEN???
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:03:2 No.12910952
>>12910900

You tell them that they were witches.

Everyone knows water melts witches, and killing witches is good for society.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:03:3 No.12910954
Can someone link me to the download?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:03:3 No.12910955
>>12910924
>I've even upped the mouse sensitivity to see if it'll make my cock work properly.
Only /r9k/ could produce a sentence like this. Doesn't that make you feel good?
Never change.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:03:4 No.12910956
>>12910924

>I've even upped the mouse sensitivity to see if it'll make my cock work properly.

Only on /r9k/.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:04:3 No.12910967
>>12910956
Brofist, hivemindbro!
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:04:4 No.12910971
     File :1294963487882.jpg-(75 KB, 426x648, neveralone32.jpg)
75 KB
Okay, okay, back on track. I convinced her to kiss me while we are standing, precariously balanced on the edge of the bed.

>>12910913

I have cleared all the junk off my desk, so I can move my mouse about two feet now.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:05:5 No.12910992
>>12910971
I love imagining you playing it, I wish I could draw, so I could draw you.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:06:1 No.12910998
>>12910971

>inb4 broken neck and dead girl

I'M ON TO YOU, OP
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:06:4 No.12911004
>>12910952

I think I've found the plot device for a new Hellsing anime.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:07:4 No.12911029
>>12910971
I should've gone to bed an hour ago and I just can't...
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:08:2 No.12911041
     File :1294963705707.jpg-(128 KB, 953x636, neveralone33.jpg)
128 KB
Okay, some response! But I must have pushed my mouse about a hundred yards forward and I can't seem to actually fuck her
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:08:2 No.12911042
>>12910971

>I have cleared all the junk off my desk, so I can move my mouse about two feet now.

Inb4 OP cocks clear through the girl, spilling guts everywhere.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:08:5 No.12911052
>>12911029
I was supposed to work but now AHAHAHA I just can't ahahahaha
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:10:0 No.12911075
>>12911041

Is that blood on her thighs?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:10:2 No.12911079
>>12911041

Looks like her pussy is spitting blood at you.
Is that a good sign?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:10:2 No.12911084
Is that blood coming out of her vagina?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:10:3 No.12911087
>>12911041
Her face XDDD
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:10:5 No.12911092
     File :1294963858463.jpg-(125 KB, 1020x439, neveralone34.jpg)
125 KB
Okay, trying again on the floor!

She... she says hurtful things, /r9k/, as far as I know I was inside.

>>12911042
Made me lol heartily
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:12:5 No.12911119
>>12911092

OP, stick it in her ass, see if she notices then.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:14:3 No.12911146
     File :1294964079492.jpg-(161 KB, 1079x839, neveralone35.jpg)
161 KB
HOLY SHIT, I DID IT

You need to use the scrool wheel as well as drag upwards!
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:14:4 No.12911148
>>12911092

Even in the virtual world /r9k/s pen0r is too small.
Oh well. At least you've got a virtual computer to chase away the roneryness ;_;
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:15:5 No.12911161
>>12911146

I take it you've just lost your virtual virginity before your irl.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:17:0 No.12911176
     File :1294964220047.jpg-(124 KB, 908x648, neveralone36.jpg)
124 KB
It looks like something is happening, although the game does seem to clip off the model for my penis in a rather disturbing way.

>>12911161

Feels good man, feels good.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:17:0 No.12911178
This is amazing.

iloveyour9kblox
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:17:0 No.12911179
>>12911146

YES! I AM GETTING LAID OVER THE INTERNET!!!!
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:18:4 No.12911198
Alright, that's it. Downloading.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:18:5 No.12911201
>>12911176
Vagina dentata
X.x
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:20:2 No.12911233
     File :1294964429987.jpg-(94 KB, 767x464, neveralone37.jpg)
94 KB
And as soon as it's over, she starts acting like she doesn't know me.

I don't know what to say.

Well, I'm sure we've all learned something today, anons.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:20:3 No.12911234
>>12911146
>You need to use the scrool wheel as well as drag upwards!
just like IRL
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:21:1 No.12911243
>>12911146
>>12911176
Bravo OP! You make /r9k/ proud.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:23:0 No.12911278
>>12911233

She just wanted to mutilate your dick OP.
Fucking cyber-women :(
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:24:0 No.12911293
>>12911176

WHAT. THE FUCK.
It's like somebody cut the end off of a sausage...
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:24:3 No.12911301
>>12911278

Moot needs to read this this needs to be archived..
jesus christ this is epic beyond telling.
ALSO AHAHHAHAHHAHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAHAHAHAHHAHA *dies*
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:25:1 No.12911314
>>12911233

Witches and Bores.
lolcommentnotoriginalyoufagbloxx
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:27:2 No.12911345
>>12911233
Women - they cut off your dick, and then they don't want anything to do with you.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:29:1 No.12911372
>>12911345
>>12911233
This must be how babies are made
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:29:2 No.12911375
Great success OP. This thread was hilarious!
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:29:3 No.12911377
ARCHIVE THIS
*requests*

Hurry!
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:32:0 No.12911409
>>12911372

I was too embarassed to listen to what the woman in Sex Ed was saying, but I'm pretty sure you're right.
Congrats OP, you're going to be a dad!
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:33:5 No.12911427
>I've even upped the mouse sensitivity to see if it'll make my cock work properly.
PFFFTHAHAHAH THIS IS WHY I FUCKING COME HERE

/r9k/, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:37:5 No.12911479
Oh dear god this thread made my day, Thank you OP from the bottom of my heart.

Download 72% complete.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:38:0 No.12911480
Thankyou for this thread OP!

and WELL DONE!!
>> R@0 01/13/11(Thu)19:42:1 No.12911532
She's fucking the neighbor.
Forget her !!
...Good lord. I am on /r9k/ too much.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:42:2 No.12911536
>>12911479
How is yours at 72%? Fuck
I am still at 6% and I started when the thread was pretty new
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:44:1 No.12911557
>>12911176
>>12911233

OP has become a man. Virtually.
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:45:5 No.12911579
i have a mac.

foreveralone.jpg
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:47:2 No.12911598
>>12911579

Is the incompatibly of the software an allegory for you being autistic in life?
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)19:55:2 No.12911688
>>12911479
>>12911536

Glad I could introduce it to some other anons too :)

It would be neat if there were a way to interface the game with a chat-bot or something, so you could talk to the girls as well...
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)20:01:2 No.12911776
>>12911688
>>12911688
You should talk to chatbot, /r9k/'s original waifu
>> Anonymous 01/13/11(Thu)20:10:4 No.12911896
I was informed Real Kanojo would cure my ronriness.

I'll never fall for it again.
>> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)00:59:1 No.12915061
This is fucking brilliant.
4chanarchive this shit.
>> moot FF0000;font-weight:no No.12915258
i love you /r9k/

never change
>> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)01:16:2 No.12915269
>>12915258
>>12915258
FIRST
I LOVE YOU
>> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)01:16:3 No.12915276
>>12915258
Love you too.

Awesome job, OP.
>> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)01:18:4 No.12915293
Imma try this
>> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)01:19:0 No.12915299
lol forever beta

also moot
>> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)01:19:3 No.12915304
>>12915258
>>12915276
>>12915269

Group hug? Group hug.
>> Suddenly, Tripcodes! !yRd8SXc/L. 1/14/11(Fri)01:20:30 No.12915317
>>12911427
This is my favorite quote in a really long time.
>> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)01:20:3 No.12915318
moot posted and no shitstorm?
whats going on?
>> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)01:20:5 No.12915320
>>12915258
mootGET
if dubbz moot is an everlasting faggot
>> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)01:21:0 No.12915324
>>12915258
OH FUCK ITS MOOT.
wub to you <3
>> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)01:21:4 No.12915329
>>12915258
we lub you too moot, we lub you too.
>> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)01:28:4 No.12915399
>>12915304
Group huuuuug. <3

This thread is awesome.
>> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)01:30:5 No.12915409
If I can't have sex from behind like virtual man can does that mean my penis is small? Or is his just really large?
>> Shy Lurker 01/14/11(Fri)01:37:4 No.12915478
love you, moot. And congrats, OP- you're a man now
>> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)01:39:3 No.12915493
My download is going too slow. Two more days. Hold me, /r9k/.
>> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)01:43:3 No.12915531
>>12915258
>mfw

i love you op. so many laughs.
>> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)01:49:1 No.12915589
     File :1294987757449.jpg-(70 KB, 351x440, 1294667153559.jpg)
70 KB
>THIS FUCKING THREAD
Oh lawdy lawdy.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ndX2RFHmMNg
7 seconds to 9/10 seconds.

I still feel bad for that guy.
>> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)01:49:5 No.12915596
I love you OP.

I hope one day you'll be able to do this IRL too.
>> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)01:54:1 No.12915645
>>12915596
awkwardness and everything!
>> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)02:02:0 No.12915726
This is totally worth staying up way, way too late.

I love you, robutts. I love you all.
>> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)02:03:5 No.12915742
Why is Japan so sick fuck everyday all the time?
>> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)02:05:2 No.12915757
this is the first thread that has literally made me laugh out loud in a long long long time. much respect OP
>> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)02:09:0 No.12915793
GAAAH Download faster!
I wish to test this for myself!
>> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)02:25:2 No.12915947
6GB is a bit much for a vortual girl

>>12915258

OMG ITS MOOT
>> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)02:45:0 No.12916133
And then, Who said /r9k/ doesn't believe in love?
>> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)02:49:2 No.12916178
     File :1294991369493.jpg-(123 KB, 1024x767, sacrifice.jpg)
123 KB
Didn't sacrifice your waifu? You don't know shit about video games.
>> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)04:05:2 No.12916718
erm download finished. how do i english?
>> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)06:01:5 No.12917408
>>12916718

Did you download the version with the patched installer? If not you want to use the patched installer from the forum link in the OP.

You quite probably also need to change your language settings to allow moon runes.

comments

by anonymous | 2011-10-16 03:54:10 UTC

what the fuck did i just look at?

by anonymous | 2011-11-14 10:21:33 UTC

There's so much beauty in the world.


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