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[ - ] Anyone have kids at Dalton and now regret it? Why? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:28 PM Flag
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^^^^ or any other or the independent schools discussed on UB? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:32 PM Flag
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What is the obsession with Dalton this week? Even more than usual. Get accepted first and then stress about whether you made the right decision LOL. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:43 PM Flag
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Question is about how reality stood up to expectations. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:45 PM Flag
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^^^^ and reputation. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:46 PM Flag
[ - ] I'm pretty sure DH and I are done with one child. It feels right for us. But sometimes, I see my DC play alone in the living room, and it almost makes me sad (even though he seems happy, smiling and all..) I think, wouldn't it be nice for DC to have a playmate? Am I projecting? I don't think it's a good enough reason to have another if our family works well with one. I am honestly happy with one, and so is DH.. I just see a lot of siblings play together and seeing DC alone makes me feel a little bad. 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:22 PM Flag
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My friends have one dd ... She is the best young woman I know! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:27 PM Flag
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And my friends have a fantastic marriage. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:27 PM Flag
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She went to HM. Is in graduate school now. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:29 PM Flag
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OP: Thanks for this :). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:30 PM Flag
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Don't worry about it. Sibs aren't always the best of friends. You could have another dc and the two kids might totally diverge from one another in terms of personality. You're fine with the choice you make. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:31 PM Flag
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Exactly, I have a sister and she and I are not close. I feel more like I need to "manage her" bc she's is way out in left field. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:42 PM Flag
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You are me. I'm the oldest of three and hated having siblings. I do sometimes wish DD had a built -in playmate but she's very outgoing and has plenty of friends. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:35 PM Flag
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I think there are a lot of advantages to having one, and you should do what's best for your family. My dh is a well adjusted only child. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:42 PM Flag
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Don't worry. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:41 PM Flag
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From experience, the feeling intensifies if its already there. Keep an open mind and a few years down the line you may choose to have another [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:44 PM Flag
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I feel the same way. But as dd gets older, I feel less bad about it. How old is your dc? Mine is almost 5. Now that she's in school all day, the lack of siblings is much less of an issue. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:44 PM Flag
[ - ] I'm sooo bored, but I'm not bored enough to clean my apartment. 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:02 PM Flag
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Welcome to the club! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:05 PM Flag
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Set a timer for 20 minutes, see what you can get done, relax for 20 minutes, repeat. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:05 PM Flag
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I make myself watch live TV and then clean on the commercials. Then I end up getting so caught up in the cleaning that I have to rewind the program, or I end up forgetting about it entirely. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:07 PM Flag
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Clean it. I am doing it tonight so I can have fun all weekend. Get it over with. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:12 PM Flag
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I do that, too. But I never get so caught up in the cleaning that my ass isn't back on the couch after two mins. Still, it gets the laundry done and the dishwasher loaded. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:44 PM Flag
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I've been relaxing on the couch for 3 hours already [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:12 PM Flag
[ - ] Help a midwest girl buck the trends... NYC: what's coming our way?!?! 15 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:59 PM Flag
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Booties, heavy "cats eye" eye liner, gluten free [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:03 PM Flag
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gluten free is so 5 years ago, at this point. Same with booties, frankly. Are cats eyes back? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:14 PM Flag
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I think booties will be big this fall and winter. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:35 PM Flag
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What do you mean "buck the trends?" [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:05 PM Flag
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supergas, patterned jeans [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:15 PM Flag
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bingo! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:44 PM Flag
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short nails, black polish [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:16 PM Flag
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Navy polish [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:20 PM Flag
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Balyage [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:24 PM Flag
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^^^ balayage [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:25 PM Flag
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balayage is over [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:42 PM Flag
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Not even close. What makes you say this? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:44 PM Flag
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2005 mom? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:45 PM Flag
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Stripes, metallic cap toes, oxblood lips and shoes, colored handbags. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:43 PM Flag
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What's the next Keratin? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:45 PM Flag
[ - ] Is maple a good wood for a dining room table? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:56 PM Flag
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Good for country look [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:03 PM Flag
[ - ] Do a lot of parents at your dc school have second homes? Makes it hard to weekend get togethers. 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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NY Schools 10.12.12, 09:49 PM Flag
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weekends are family time [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:52 PM Flag
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Yes they do but as dcs get older many stay in for sports stuff. Also most people respect family time. It's not like you would be missing out on play dates if you don't have one. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:55 PM Flag
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ewww. Snob. Don't you ever try soemthing new? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:42 PM Flag
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Whether they do or not most prefer to meet up during the week and spend the weekend with family. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:54 PM Flag
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Yes. We'll stay in the city for most birthday parties, but otherwise we're at our country house. Same as the majority of our kid's grade. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:59 PM Flag
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We never make playdates on the weekends even if we do not go to the house. It is family time. From time to time we do things with families that we like, but not just kid playdates. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:02 PM Flag
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But your kids hang out with your friends kids on the weekends? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:43 PM Flag
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yes, but we don't get together on weekends with kids anyway. who has time for that??? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:07 PM Flag
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IDK. I know we're at the beach on weekends and close friends are always welcome. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:16 PM Flag
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We have a house that we use from early spring to late fall. As we have an only, we often bring one of dd's friends for the wkend. We enjoy having her friends around. And when it's reciprocated we love the time alone. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:43 PM Flag
[ - ] DH and I were raised Catholic but have since abandoned the faith. Now that I'm looking for schools for DD, I've become interested in a few Catholic schools, but didn't consider joining a parish because I thought it would look like we were doing it just for the discount. Called the admissions office of one of the schools, and the woman who answered said "join the parish if you'd like, you'll get a major discount!" 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:47 PM Flag
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So do it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:49 PM Flag
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Follow your conscience. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:51 PM Flag
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You don't need to return to the faith, but if the two of you are actively turned off by Catholicism, then it is hypocritical. Of course if you don't like the faith, you shouldn't be sending your daughter there. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:51 PM Flag
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I know someone who did this and they are very happy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:55 PM Flag
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they went back to being practicing Catholic? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:05 PM Flag
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or they are turned off by Catholicism but like Catholic school? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:15 PM Flag
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OP: I'm turned off by the Vatican and many American bishops. But I love nuns, I love the work done by the church around the world to help the poor. I love that the school curriculum teaches the importance social justice and charity. One of the churches is considered liberal and I'm thinking about attending mass to see if it really is before making a decision. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:58 PM Flag
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np: ITA. It's a disgrace the way Rome persecutes nuns. All that my-way-or-the-highway patriarchy is what is wrong with the Catholic church, not to mention the scandals they sweep under the rug. But the boots-on-the-ground people dp spme tremendous good in the world. Signed, Lapsed Catholic mom who understands the value of the catholic faith. Haters, go away. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:19 PM Flag
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Do it and donate part of your savings to the church. Win for everyone. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:54 PM Flag
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OP: ah, that's a good idea! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:02 PM Flag
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Of course. The church and school want you to be involved. They don't see themselves as a cheap private school. And they give preference to parishioners. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:08 PM Flag
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Join if you are going to send the kids. You have to actually go though and use your envelopes or Parish pay. They don't give a discount just for signing up; you have to be part of the community. You don't have to agree w/ the Church on every issue, but you have to show up. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:21 PM Flag
[ - ] Most days I look forward to having a beer or a couple glasses of wine when the kids go to bed Anything wrong with that? I feel guilty sometimes because its a daily occurence. 15 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:46 PM Flag
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I don't know how anyone gets through a day at work then all evening with small kids without having a drink. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:52 PM Flag
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LOL! I was about to write that. Wine is the only way to get through imo. If you have a few glasses fine. If it's a bottle or two every night that's a different story. You know the difference. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:56 PM Flag
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4 glasses is a bottle [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:17 PM Flag
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yes! this! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:36 PM Flag
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Sounds fine if you tolerate it well and it doesn't cause you 4am insomnia, irritability or depression. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:55 PM Flag
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Its UB we all do the same! If you are looking for anyone to tell you to stop you won't find it here. So CHEERS! But honestly I think it is fine, it is after they go to bed, as long as you are not getting drunk every night and not able to function in an emergency if something happens I think you are ok. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:57 PM Flag
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oh there are definitely women on here that will tell you that you are an alcoholic for drinking every day. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:37 PM Flag
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It's fine. Some Americans have hang ups about drinking reasonable amounts. You know if it's having adverse effects. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:00 PM Flag
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Unfortunately, those who do have a problem rarely know it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:02 PM Flag
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BS. They know it they just don't want to do anything about it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:08 PM Flag
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A few real size glasses ( 6oz) or the kind of glasses that you can finish the bottle in 2/3 glasses. I think I need smaller wine glasses :) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:00 PM Flag
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Drinking daily increases the chances for cancer. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:04 PM Flag
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Yes, but I would like my shorter life to be enjoyable [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:21 PM Flag
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Does your DH say anything? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:08 PM Flag
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It's what I do. I'm up at 5am every morning and never, ever drink during any other time of day, but at 5pm, if there is nothing else on the agenda and I don't have to drive anywhere, I'm having a few drinks. But, for example, if I'm at an event or doing dinner and theater or something, I rarely drink anything. Drinking makes me zone out and want to nap. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:20 PM Flag
[ - ] Q for people who throw kid bday parties at home: How messy does your apartment get and how do you clean up? Especially the rugs. 14 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:35 PM Flag
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we put everything left over in a garbage bag and throw it in the trash. Then we vacuum the rug. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:48 PM Flag
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You do realize, yo're going to get flamed up the ass for this? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:49 PM Flag
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why? I would like a realistic idea of what it will be like having 25 kids + caregivers in my apartment [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:50 PM Flag
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On how to clean up a apartment? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:52 PM Flag
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25 kids is way too many..... we just did 17 and was way too many.... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:56 PM Flag
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im expecting/hoping all won't show [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:12 PM Flag
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We invited 17 on same premise. All RSVPd yes. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:16 PM Flag
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Have kids take off shoes. Food only in one place. Same for anything messy like paints, crayons, etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:50 PM Flag
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Why would she get flamed? I think it's brave to attempt an in home party. Very normal question. I wouldn't know answer because I always do out of apt. parties. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:56 PM Flag
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OP: would also like to know if any rooms are kept off limit. How do you handle it [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:55 PM Flag
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Yes, designate rooms that are off limits (like your BR and bathroom), close doors and put up a "friendly" keep out sign on doors. Also tell all the kids, ESP your dc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:59 PM Flag
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Oh, Very important: tell your dc to put away any toys, instruments, other "special things" that he doesn't want anyone touching or playing with. You could put them all in one of the off limits rooms. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:01 PM Flag
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How big is your apt that you can fit 50 people comfortably? How old are these kids? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:22 PM Flag
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5 yo. My apt is a good size but I'm not interested in having the kids go into all the bedrooms. Now that I'm seriously thinking about it, don't think I want 35 people, most of whom I don't know, running about my place. Sheesh! Think we will have to find someplace outside that is reasonable [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:41 PM Flag
[ - ] Wats your fall coat look like? 19 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:28 PM Flag
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Same as last years. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:29 PM Flag
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+1. Hooded, one side is winter checker flannel in some bright flattering colors, reversible to a neutral waterproof if that is better at the time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:11 PM Flag
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Same as my fall coat for the last several seasons. I wear 'em till they wear out. Signed, non-fashion mom. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:30 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:56 PM Flag
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The best fashion moms don't buy new. They would rather wear something quality, not quantity so you're fine. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:56 PM Flag
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Shorts and a t-shirt, I live in Texas. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:29 PM Flag
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I am outside a lot so I have a parka with removable lining depending on the weather. Not a llbean type one, more of a militaryish style. Probably last years trend but I don't care as it is really functional [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:30 PM Flag
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i have a barbour jacket for fall, then transition into a postcard when it gets colder. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:32 PM Flag
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What's a postcard coat? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:35 PM Flag
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more like a wintercoat (it is a specific brand) UB seems to bash them, but they are funtional and warm, and i like them (have 2). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:37 PM Flag
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Same! Debating the Barbour liner this year...for now, I layer with a vest (down or fur, depending on the weather and/or my outfit) on colder days. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:49 PM Flag
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I actually purchased several new coats this year. I haven't gotten new coats in years. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:57 PM Flag
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Can't say it will give me away. Very unique brands. Really. Spent way too much but got all of them on sale and probably won't buy again for years. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:13 PM Flag
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I also have a down vest, never tonight to layer...I just have that in the mix too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:11 PM Flag
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Which one? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:55 PM Flag
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J. Crew vest. Old J. Crew black wool car coat. I'm in the South so don't need the heavy duty stuff. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:02 PM Flag
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barn coat by llbean on weekends and quilted llbean 3/4 length otherwise. both are old (not that you asked) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:08 PM Flag
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Do you like the quilted LL Bean? I'm thinking about buying one this year. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:12 PM Flag
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.I'm on my second - the first model was better, but i do love these coats. the first one had a different finish and was toasty warm until the early winter. the second one has a shiny finish and is still warm, but the first one. i still wear it, shabby as it has become. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:15 PM Flag
[ - ] Has anyone experienced secondary infertility? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:27 PM Flag
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What is that? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:55 PM Flag
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Np -When you get pg easy first time around and have a baby, but have issues when trying to get pg for #2. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:06 PM Flag
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I think this has to do with repeated MCs, right? I had one MC trying for #2 and now I am very paranoid. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:06 PM Flag
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I experienced secondary fertility [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:11 PM Flag
[ - ] Superbas cool or euro trash? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:25 PM Flag
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Supergas [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:25 PM Flag
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I really like them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:49 PM Flag
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what is a super bra? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:11 PM Flag
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The sneakers? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:37 PM Flag
[ - ] At what age did you start throwing birthday parties for DC? We celebrated DS's first birthday earlier this year with family in our apartment, but this was unusual among my friends and acquaintances who have DC. 23 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:07 PM Flag
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At 1 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:09 PM Flag
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this [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:10 PM Flag
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this [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:15 PM Flag
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we had a fewfamily and friends for brunch for 1st and 2d birthdays; at 3 started parties. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:10 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:57 PM Flag
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OP again, so I'm just curious if DH and I are just no fun! Am considering throwing a casual party for DS's second birthday in a few months. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:13 PM Flag
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Depends. Do you have a lot of family, friends nearby? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:17 PM Flag
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Yes, in the metro area! DH has convinced me a party is not necessary and I sometimes agree but would love to throw a pizza party or something esp. since so many of my friends have DCs close in age. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:31 PM Flag
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Then the party is for you not your child. I 2yo does not understand birthday parties. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:52 PM Flag
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my kids are 2 and 3. so far all parties have been at our house with family. DS is turning 4this year and I'm considering a kids party 4 guests (one for each year old) but most likely will stick to a family party. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:12 PM Flag
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Everyone is different. Some people are big into birthdays, like to do it up, fancy invitations all the trimmings. Some more low key. Do what feels like you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:21 PM Flag
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family party age 1, with dc's friends age 2 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:27 PM Flag
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At a gym or playspace [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:29 PM Flag
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a 2yo does not have friends. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:53 PM Flag
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First kid had a party with "friends" every year. 2nd kid had his first party age 4. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:35 PM Flag
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1st bday we threw a huge bbq party. I had suffered 11 years of infertility. For dc #2 parties started at age 4. Dc #3 had his first friends party at age 6. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:40 PM Flag
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for turning 1 we had family in the apt and a cake. For 2 we started having a real bday party with other DCs. But I only did this because we have a lot of friends with DCs the same ages as ours, so they had a built in group of "friends" very early on. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:43 PM Flag
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OP here, this is us...wondering if I should throw age 2 bday party since most of my friends have kids. I just did a list in excel grid, though, and already counted 50 people (assuming 2 parents accompany kids) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:45 PM Flag
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3 or 4. Silly before that, imo. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:45 PM Flag
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4. ITA. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:46 PM Flag
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We did a few family/adult friend's for 1, just family for 2, a couple of his friends for 3 then a big party at 4 when he really wanted it. I am not into th being fancy party for little kids thing, way too much effort for me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:45 PM Flag
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1-3 was just family and our close friends with kids the same age. Oldest is in pre-k and we may do a kid party for 4, but only if all the other kids in his class do or if he asks. We're not bringing it up and will just do family otherwise and do kid party at 5. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:27 PM Flag
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). we just make a cake and sing happy birthday. dd is 12 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:28 PM Flag
[ - ] How was the Barbra Steisand concert? Did you go? 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:02 PM Flag
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I'm not sure UB is the best audience. Don't 60 year old women and/or gay men like her? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:08 PM Flag
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Beatles too? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:12 PM Flag
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i like her and im in my 30's [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:13 PM Flag
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You rock! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:14 PM Flag
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You have no taste in music. I don't care how old you are. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:15 PM Flag
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She has one of the best pop voices of all time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:11 PM Flag
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Maybe UB doesn't do Bklyn. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:18 PM Flag
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Plenty of school and apt posts about Brooklyn. So I doubt this explains it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:36 PM Flag
[ - ] Question re Trinity K admission process: When do tours start and does the playdate and family interview happen on the same day, with two families coming in at once (kids play together though parents interview seperately). 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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NY Schools 10.12.12, 09:02 PM Flag
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We did our last year and we had our interview (with Jennifer Levine) and our dc had pd at same time with one other child. The two sets of parents sat together in the waiting area. Was a bit awkward because dh knew the other dh. Gl. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:08 PM Flag
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Our interview was delayed because the other family was late! We did not interview together (with the other family) so I'm not clear on why we had to sit in the waiting area with DC for so long. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:15 PM Flag
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Because the kids do the pd together. To op you don't do your interview with another couple. Only the child does it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:00 PM Flag
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Tour was given by a parent volunteer about 1 week before the interview. Two families go on the tour. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:12 PM Flag
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So first the tour with another family and then a week or two later the pd/pi? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:24 PM Flag
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We did our tour by ourselves. No other family. It is given by a parent. Maybe the other family couldn't make it. Everyone thought it odd that we were alone but I didn't ask why. Everyone was really nice. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:01 PM Flag
[ - ] Hada sitter from back up care at my house with my 2 kids since 8am. I literally have no idea what we're paying her per hour bc it's through a service. What should I tip? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 08:59 PM Flag
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0$ [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:02 PM Flag
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You do not have to tip. I don't knOw anyone who would. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:04 PM Flag
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Nada [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:16 PM Flag
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nothing [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:16 PM Flag
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you don't tip babysitters! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:42 PM Flag
[ - ] Your best dating wisdom? Mine: No one likesthe crazy girl. Until she's not crazy about you anymore. 15 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 08:46 PM Flag
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doing personal tasks for superiors at the firm - which takes a lot of time away from my work. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 08:46 PM Flag
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oh sorry meant to post this on the ridic/ludic part of your job post lol [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 08:46 PM Flag
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he who cares least wins [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 08:46 PM Flag
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THIS [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 08:48 PM Flag
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+1000 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 08:49 PM Flag
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He's only a man, not God. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 08:53 PM Flag
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Men can smell desparate-ness from a mile away [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:08 PM Flag
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DH here. So can women. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:53 PM Flag
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1.Don't waste your time with a loser, thinking he will change. 2.People show you who they are, it your pay attention. 3. Pay attention, don't live in a dream world. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:14 PM Flag
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If he wants to see you or get in touch with you...he will. The man who really wants to be with you, will contact you so much that may even seem excessive. It's not, he just knows he wants to be with you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:19 PM Flag
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This is so true [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:22 PM Flag
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To quote George Costanza, "If they lke me I don't like them. If I like them they don't like me." [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:21 PM Flag
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This. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:25 PM Flag
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unmarried men are like taxi drivers, they pick up, drop off, repeat. When ready to marry, there's no return to old passengers. They start with the latest [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:01 PM Flag
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weird analogy. i was with you til the last sentence. don't taxi drivers continue to pick up and drop off forever. What would the taxi analogy be to getting married? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:04 PM Flag
[ - ] Pg with twins. Want TT ongoing. What steps can we take to guarantee this outcome? 66 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 08:45 PM Flag
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Pick the school that you have chosen to send your twins, and send the school a honking big check. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 08:49 PM Flag
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OP: But we have no connections to the schools. Basically, we want Dalton or HM or Trinity (B/G twins). You obviously cant just write a check. Should I ask for a meeting with a development officer? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 08:53 PM Flag
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If you're serious and wealthy, yes, make appointment with head of development and say you want to meet to discuss your making a major gift to the school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 08:58 PM Flag
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You are pregnant with twins and this is your concern? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 08:51 PM Flag
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word! concentrate on having the babies first. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 08:54 PM Flag
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OP: Thanks for your advice, but I've got that covered. I want to know about school. Please dont hijack my thread. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 08:56 PM Flag
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Call head of development. Say you want to meet because you are a big supporter of school D/T/HM and are considering making a major 6/7 figure donation to support the school. No need to mention your twins. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:00 PM Flag
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OP: thanks, but dont you think we need some kind of a face saving cover story for why we're supporters. I grew up in the city (DH did not), but have no connection to any of the TT coeds. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:01 PM Flag
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No, say that you heard of the school's World reputation. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:03 PM Flag
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if you have enough money to give the school, those are barriers you can overcome [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:04 PM Flag
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Say you grew up in NYC, are passionate about education and think school XYZ is a model of educational excellence and something you want to ensure will continue and thrive. Or any other BS. If you want to give 6 or 7 figures, the school won't really care what your stated reason is as long as they're sure you're good for the $$. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:08 PM Flag
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OP: Im not sure we're willing to write a 7 figure check. That seems a bit steep. I was thinking more like $250k. Does that not move the needle? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:15 PM Flag
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Yes [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:16 PM Flag
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OP: Yes it is enough, or no it is not enough? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:18 PM Flag
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Yes, I assume it is enough. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:21 PM Flag
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^^^^ but I am just giving you my assumptions. I am not in development or admissions, so I am guessing. Did have two dc go to one of the schools you like. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:23 PM Flag
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I think if you're going to give low six-figures, the best way is to spread it out over time. Give $50k a year, like a tease. By giving consistently, they're always thinking of you year after year. You'll be invited to the various events, and can meet the people in the development office regularly. By giving over time, you signal that you'll step up your donation pattern once the kids are in. I know that at HM if you gave $50k to the annual fund, you would be in the top tier of recognition. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:31 PM Flag
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OP: This! Great thought. The idea of writing a check all at once seems crass, and a bunch of small checks that add up seems much better. Thanks! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:34 PM Flag
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I'm 50/50. They also like the "bird in hand" and can designate for particular purpose -- library upgrade, gym renov., new lobby, technology, etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:40 PM Flag
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This is sick. Donate to charity [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:21 PM Flag
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OP: Thanks for your advice. We donate plenty to charity. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:22 PM Flag
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You could also pledge an annual donation, say $50k for 12 years. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:33 PM Flag
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Nobody will believe this. Nobody gives a donation to a private school they have no connection to unless there's a social motive. You will look like a social climber. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:12 PM Flag
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You've "got that covered"???? Have an in with the man upstairs that we don't know about? How entitled are you? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:03 PM Flag
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I think the obvious first step is to hire a consultant. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 08:58 PM Flag
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This is a good idea, too. One of those consultants who help get your kid into a good school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:24 PM Flag
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OP: Which ones are connected to the right ADs? I dont want a consultant that is going to give me a bunch of ERB prep books or help me with essays. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:27 PM Flag
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I agree, wouldn't go this route. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:40 PM Flag
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How far along are you? Your focus should be healthy babies. Twin pregnancies are difficult. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:03 PM Flag
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Join TT preschool temple or church NOW and get highly involved. Temple Emanuel or Brick Church maybe. If you're not going the way of writing a big honking check, then develop and tighten connections. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:02 PM Flag
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OP: Hm, we're at Central now, do you think it is worth switching to TE? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:07 PM Flag
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If you want tippity top preschool yes. But joining now is also no guarantee at all for TE. Can you donate alot AND get pretty involved (like join women's committee, go to all tot shabbats, kiss ass to director) for next two years? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:08 PM Flag
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OP: Frankly, I'd rather give money instead of time. And honestly, growing up, I never liked the congregation at TE. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:09 PM Flag
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And you think you'll like the parent body at the schools you want? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:11 PM Flag
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You sound like a snob [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:18 PM Flag
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I hated the TE congregation but the preschool was terrific and the head of the preschool is very smart and very well connected. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:26 PM Flag
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^^^^ she would want some $$ for TE, too! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:41 PM Flag
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Working through the preschool director of one of these Is a great idea. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:10 PM Flag
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100% Fake [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:05 PM Flag
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Serious question: how do you know these schools will be a good fit for your dc? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:06 PM Flag
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Duh, she doesn't care. It's about HER bragging rights. Who cares about the kids. Silly question. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:09 PM Flag
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See of you know a trustee at any of these schools ... Or a friend who knows someone. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:09 PM Flag
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OP: Unfortunately, and I was surprised at this, we literally don't know a soul on any of the Boards. If we did, it would be easy to make a discreet gift. Too bad Im not carrying G/G because we have excellent contacts at two of the girls schools. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:12 PM Flag
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Just be grateful and hope for healthy children. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:15 PM Flag
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(I suspect that this isn't a real post) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:17 PM Flag
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Get your little boy an operation. Problem solved. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:15 PM Flag
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Lol, I had the same, sick thought. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:26 PM Flag
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During the Renaissance and early modern age, you know, Italian parents would arrange for surgery for their sons who they wanted to be opera stars, so that the boys would develop the powerful voice of a man, but they would never go below soprano. It was all illegal, of course; the parents would tell the doctors that they boys had had "accidents". [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:32 PM Flag
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Castrati. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:51 PM Flag
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Wow! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:39 PM Flag
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What about asking friends for connections? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:17 PM Flag
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OP: I want to be discreet. That's why I'm on UB. In person, I prefer to not be known as a crazy, neurotic, NYC woman! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:18 PM Flag
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Ask your girl school contacts to introduce you to someone at D, T or HM. The three of you can have tea, [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:18 PM Flag
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Also it's possible some of your girl school board friends have sons at one of the schools you like. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:27 PM Flag
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A honking big gift, or even a $250K gift to a school from someone who isn't an alum or a parent, is not discreet. Development and admissions staff are not stupid. You need to go through an intermediary. Get a consultant or send DC to a fancy preschool, and start by giving the preschool a nice gift, then tell PSD your ulterior motive. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:30 PM Flag
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I agree on working thru the PSD. But remember she'll want a nice donation, too. I don't know what kind of consultant would be helpful. Do you know anyone on the board of the Parents League? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:42 PM Flag
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This is a joke right? Because it is really funny [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:31 PM Flag
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I am not very susperstitious, but I would not jinx myself by thinking this way. What if your kids aren't smart enough to get in or don't test well? Money will get you far, but not all the way if they don't measure up to the baseline. What if they're autistic or have some other disability? I certainly hope they don't for your sake. But why be so presumptous and set yourself up for massive disappointment (and them for massive pressure and unfair expectations)? You and your DH may have high IQs, but as I am sure many women on this board can attest to, that doesn't mean your kids are going to be as brilliant as you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:53 PM Flag
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^^^ Also, I don't know if there is any evidence backing this up, but aren't twins more likely to have learning disabilities, etc.? If you did IVF, I would also worry a little bit. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:54 PM Flag
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+1. I'd wait and make sure the kids are healthy and seem like good candidates. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:01 PM Flag
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What was the story several years ago about the wall street honcho who paid to get his kids into 92y? Maybe worth researching this. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 09:56 PM Flag
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Grubman. I think he gave $1M gift to get his twins in. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:18 PM Flag
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Why is this so important to you? I think you said you belong to Central Synagogue. Don't you know that Jews aren't even supposed to decorate the nursery ahead of time, not less arrange K admissions. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:05 PM Flag
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Why don't you give your synagogue a big gift? It will be noticed. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:19 PM Flag
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I agree. Start getting yourself a reputation as a big donor. All the schools you mentioned will know this when you apply. Just make sure your generous gifts are well publicized, so they show up in google. Become associated with educational charity, or cancer society or head start or prep for prep or something like that. OTOH .... You can always send your dc to Avenues! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:43 PM Flag
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Are you a social climber? Is that what this is about? Because you stress how unconnected you are. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.12.12, 10:42 PM Flag
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