Holy cow! Moo-vie star Patrick Stewart milks his time on air and keeps podcast listeners udderly entertained with bovine impressions

By Felicity Thistlethwaite

PUBLISHED: 11:47 EST, 31 December 2013 | UPDATED: 04:40 EST, 1 January 2014


He’s the man behind great Hollywood movies such as X Men and Star Trek but it looks like Patrick Stewart’s career has taken a new direction: cow impressions.

The famous British star spent ten minutes doing impressions of cows from various places including west Oxfordshire, rural northern  England and Nevada, America.

The star of stage and screen, 73,  was invited onto the 30 minute weekly podcast called How To Do Everything hosted by Mike Danforth and Ian Chillag to explain the difference between northern and southern cows’ calls.

He's a joker: Patrick Stewart spent nearly 10 minutes doing impressions of cows on a podcast called How To Do Everything

He's a joker: Patrick Stewart spent nearly 10 minutes doing impressions of cows on a podcast called How To Do Everything

Ian began: ‘Hi Mike, Hi Ian. And you’d like me to answer that question, which I’m happy to do. It’s not a straightforward simple answer.

 

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‘Unlike probably many other countries where a cow’s moo is a cow’s moo, in England we are dominated by class, by social status and by location. So, for example, a cow that is in a field next to my house in West Oxfordshire would moo in one kind of way and a cow in a field in the semi-industrial town I grew up in would moo in another kind of way.’

The conversation began when the two podcast hosts had a call from a listener called Rachel asking: ‘How do cows moo in a British accent?’

 

The question then developed into Patrick teaching the listeners the difference between certain milk-producing animal’s moos and how to develop each specific moo.

Continuing, Patrick asked ‘Am I clear so far’ before continuing with his passionate speech.

‘If I were at home in west Oxfordshire right now and I walk down my lane, and I say “Hi good morning cows” they would moo something like this [Makes a moo noise].

‘Now that’s a very conservative moo – you must understand I live in the constituency of David Cameron, our Prime Minister, who is a Torie and I presume these cows voted for him. I don’t actually vote there I vote at another place in London.’

Amoosing: Patrick said he speaks to his cows at his house in west Oxfordshire and they speak back

Amoosing: Patrick said he speaks to his cows at his house in west Oxfordshire and they speak back

The star added: ‘If I were at home where I grew up in Yorkshire, not that there are many fields left where I grew up, but I would find one and I would find some cows, they moo like this [moos more aggressively]. Can you hear the difference?’

The weekly 30 minute podcast, which describes itself as ‘half advice show, half survival guide. We answer all your questions, from how to find a date, to how to find water in the desert’, had Patrick Stewart’s cow lesson running for nearly ten minutes in total.

The presenters went on to ask if Sir Patrick could do an impression of a Nevada cow, which is where their called Rachel was from.

The 73-year-old gleefully answered: ‘Well, you know it’s very funny you should say that because my wife is also from Nevada. So I have some experience of Nevada cattle and, if you like, I can give you my impression. It goes something like this.

‘It’s much higher pitched and much more nasal, because that’s the way you people talk. Because the cows are influenced by the way you talk and you are influenced by the cows.’

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Patrick, my dear man... you are classic.

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And he's so serious about it lol

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loved him in nightmare on elm street, brilliant.

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Just had to check that it's January not April.

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This man can literally do nothing that doesn't warm your heart.

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I liked him until I heard he was a socialist.

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Would have loved it to have been me he humiliated & bullied at that awards ceremony instead of James Corden. He would never have done it to anyone again! Think what you like about Corden, but no-one deserves that on national television.

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Mooke it so Number One!!

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Patrick Stewart has a truly awesome and surreal sense of humour. To think he made this all up ON THE HOOF! Pride of Britain.

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I love this man! And cows do moo back. It's hilarious to get a bunch of them going.

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